While visiting the EA Sports booth at the PlayStation Experience in Las Vegas on Dec. 6, I was putting the new legends added to the EA Sports UFC roster through their paces. I picked Brock Lesnar to take on Antonio Silva. I had a good time outlasting the Brazilian with the Beast Incarnate. As I […]
While visiting the EA Sports booth at the PlayStation Experience in Las Vegas on Dec. 6, I was putting the new legends added to the EA Sports UFC roster through their paces. I picked Brock Lesnar to take on Antonio Silva. I had a good time outlasting the Brazilian with the Beast Incarnate. As I […]
When bantamweight champion T.J. Dillashaw successfully defended his title Saturday night against Joe Soto at UFC 177, he proved that he belongs in the conversation as one of the pound-for-pound toughest men in the sport. The results of the pay-per-view were much more entertaining than the card should have been. The event felt incredibly lackluster […]
When bantamweight champion T.J. Dillashaw successfully defended his title Saturday night against Joe Soto at UFC 177, he proved that he belongs in the conversation as one of the pound-for-pound toughest men in the sport. The results of the pay-per-view were much more entertaining than the card should have been. The event felt incredibly lackluster […]
There was a lot of buzz and excitement swirling around the UFC’s latest endeavor in the video game market, and fight fans across the globe were finally able to get their Octagon fix when EA Sports UFC hit shelves on June 17. While the UFC and Electronic Arts had each previously ventured into the realm […]
There was a lot of buzz and excitement swirling around the UFC’s latest endeavor in the video game market, and fight fans across the globe were finally able to get their Octagon fix when EA Sports UFC hit shelves on June 17. While the UFC and Electronic Arts had each previously ventured into the realm […]
The MMA world peered at Tyron Woodley‘s ass and saw “DUDE WIPES” emblazoned across his most private chasm. In that moment, an MMA meme was born.
Dude Wipes, in some ways, are the ultimate expression of the ridiculous Dude-Bro culture ingrained in MMA–or that marketers think is ingrained in MMA. Whether through derision, revulsion, or legitimate curiosity, Dude Wipes became one of the top trends on Twitter during the fights. While some were happy to simply laugh at Dude Wipes and write them off as some kind of oddity, CagePotato wanted to know more. Myself and everyone else on the CagePotato editorial staff will never let it be said we won’t go to any heights (or depths) to the get stories that matter most to MMA. Dude Wipes, we believed, was one of those stories.
Thus, I went out to Walgreens and Target the morning after UFC 174, but found no Dude Wipes. Dejected, I resorted to making a post about them citing several Amazon reviews. But fate tossed me a life preserver in the shape of a Dude Wipe. Dude Products, makers of Dude Wipes, found out about my dilemma and hooked me up. I was excited to get my hands (and butt cheeks) on some Dude Wipes. Check them out:
I also got two wristbands that say “Fresh ass dude” and “#DudeWipes” on them; they’re shown in the video.
So how did they measure up to my expectations? Find out after the jump.
(Unboxing the care package Dude Wipes sent CagePotato. Thanks, Dude Products!)
The MMA world peered at Tyron Woodley‘s ass and saw “DUDE WIPES” emblazoned across his most private chasm. In that moment, an MMA meme was born.
Dude Wipes, in some ways, are the ultimate expression of the ridiculous Dude-Bro culture ingrained in MMA–or that marketers think is ingrained in MMA. Whether through derision, revulsion, or legitimate curiosity, Dude Wipes became one of the top trends on Twitter during the fights. While some were happy to simply laugh at Dude Wipes and write them off as some kind of oddity, CagePotato wanted to know more. Myself and everyone else on the CagePotato editorial staff will never let it be said we won’t go to any heights (or depths) to the get stories that matter most to MMA. Dude Wipes, we believed, was one of those stories.
Thus, I went out to Walgreens and Target the morning after UFC 174, but found no Dude Wipes. Dejected, I resorted to making a post about them citing several Amazon reviews. But fate tossed me a life preserver in the shape of a Dude Wipe. Dude Products, makers of Dude Wipes, found out about my dilemma and hooked me up. I was excited to get my hands (and butt cheeks) on some Dude Wipes. Check them out:
I also got two wristbands that say “Fresh ass dude” and “#DudeWipes” on them; they’re shown in the video.
So how did they measure up to my expectations?
I talk about it a bit in the above video detailing my initial reaction to them, but I hadn’t used them at that point. That video was just an appetizer.
After filming, I made sure to put myself into two distinct scenarios where Dude Wipes would be most useful: A bout of so-called “mud butt” diarrhea and an episode of excessive sweat–both without possibility of showering afterwards.
I trekked up to Taco Bell, America’s greatest guarantor of gastrointestinal malaise, and ordered enough fuel to give the bathroom at Castle CagePotato a new paint job. I especially liked the new Quesarito dish they have. I ordered mine without sour cream and chipotle sauce. I also indulged in a churro for good measure. Delicious.
Within an hour or two, the whirring of my intestines let me know I’d need my Dude Wipes soon. I’ll spare you the next set of details.
Once the intestinal aftershocks from the Taco Bell subsided, I broke out my bike and rode it around long enough to break out into a good sweat–and then some. I got back home, whipped out some Dude Wipes, and pretended I was a 13-year-old in gym class who was too shy to use the showers. The Dude Wipes performed well enough here. I definitely felt fresher from them.
Final Impression:
Some might say Dude Wipes are a needlessly gendered product. They’re right, but it doesn’t have to be this way. My biggest complaint about the Dude Wipes is that there’s nothing “Dude” about them outside of the sleek, modern, masculine packaging. They’d be great if they smelled like, I don’t know, cologne? Let me put it another way: After I use a Dude Wipe, I want to feel like a 7-foot tall lumberjack who just fucked the prom queen. I didn’t necessarily feel that way after I used them yesterday.
Furthermore, after the Taco Bell’s migration out of my colon, I was really pumped up to see how Dude Wipes would perform, only for them to be indistinguishable from baby wipes. It’d be in their best interest to make their product standout rather than just the angle at which the product is marketed.
Dude Wipes, from what I can tell, are aiming to simultaneously fulfill the functions of both baby wipes and deodorant body spray. They want to create a product that can freshen you up (either after a nasty crap or just when you’re sweaty/dirty but can’t shower) and also make you smell manly. While it succeeds in making you feel clean–I wanted to wear my “clean ass dude” wristband with pride because I was a clean ass dude thanks to the Dude Wipes–it leaves a bit to be desired in the smell manly part.
To reiterate: I would quite like Dude Wipes if they had a good–but not overpowering–masculine scent.
In terms of pure function, Dude Wipes work fine. The “crib edition” is essentially a pack of baby wipes, however. Still, their individualized, portable wipes are extremely handy and discreet. I’ll definitely be bringing a handful with me every day before I go to work as long as I have them.
TLDR: Dude Wipes has the wipes part down but needs to work on the dude aspect. Nevertheless, they can be pretty convenient. Pick up one of the to-go packs containing 30 Dude Wipes and see how you like them. You never know when diarrhea will rear it’s ugly, malformed, liquidy, corn-flecked head!
It could be argued that mixed martial arts has become the most popular combat sport in the world. That might explain why EA Sports has chosen to create a UFC game and not a boxing title despite it being three years since the well-received Fight Night Champion was released. Back in 2010, the company released […]
It could be argued that mixed martial arts has become the most popular combat sport in the world. That might explain why EA Sports has chosen to create a UFC game and not a boxing title despite it being three years since the well-received Fight Night Champion was released. Back in 2010, the company released […]
No, really. Tyron Woodley had an ad for Dude Wipes plastered on his ass (which was intentional placement by Dude Products, makers of Dude Wipes). Within minutes, “Dude Wipes” was trending worldwide on Twitter. What, pray tell, is a Dude Wipe? Here’s the story, according to the founders:
Whether it was some unexpected physical activity or the aftermath of the lunchtime burrito, we realized, as guys, we are destined to smell. Something needed to be done. So on behalf of Dudekind [Editor’s note: Ugh] we created The Award Winning Dude Wipes™ to combat stank and put you back on your game wherever or whenever nature calls.
If you’re still wiping with just toilet paper, you’re a chump and your ass hates you for it. Any red-blooded American knows Dude Wipes™ are something you never leave the crib without.
Dude Products even created some promotional material:
Being the disheveled, grubby, low-minded, basement dwelling neckbeards we are, Dude Wipes sounded right up our alley! We wanted to buy a pack of the dudeliest wipes on Earth and review them for all MMA fans. Alas, after making a perilous trek through Father’s Day traffic to FOUR separate stores, we couldn’t find any (and we weren’t asking a clerk to check for fucking Dude Wipes).
So instead of reviewing them ourselves, we’re going to post reviews from Amazon–both positive and negative.
Let’s start it off with the most glowing reviews…
(“Official sponsor of Tyron Woodley at UFC 174 (logo on the ass, of course)” / Photo via DudeProducts.com)
No, really. Tyron Woodley had an ad for Dude Wipes plastered on his ass (which was intentional placement by Dude Products, makers of Dude Wipes). Within minutes, “Dude Wipes” was trending worldwide on Twitter. What, pray tell, is a Dude Wipe? Here’s the story, according to the founders:
Whether it was some unexpected physical activity or the aftermath of the lunchtime burrito, we realized, as guys, we are destined to smell. Something needed to be done. So on behalf of Dudekind [Editor’s note: Ugh] we created The Award Winning Dude Wipes™ to combat stank and put you back on your game wherever or whenever nature calls.
If you’re still wiping with just toilet paper, you’re a chump and your ass hates you for it. Any red-blooded American knows Dude Wipes™ are something you never leave the crib without.
Dude Products even created some promotional materials:
Being the disheveled, grubby, low-minded, basement dwelling neckbeards we are, Dude Wipes sounded right up our alley! We wanted to buy a pack of the dudeliest wipes on Earth and review them for all MMA fans. Alas, after making a perilous trek through Father’s Day traffic to FOUR separate stores, we couldn’t find any (and we weren’t asking a clerk to check for fucking Dude Wipes).
So instead of reviewing them ourselves, we’re going to post reviews from Amazon–both positive and negative.
Let’s start it off with the most glowing reviews:
What a great product. Very functional, discreet, and effective. A perfect cure for male “swamp-ass”! . I highly recommended this product. Especially great for boating or camping. – Link.
After receiving this product as a grab bag gift, I am in love. As another reviewer put it, this is not just an after bathroom wipe. I have used the Wipe to stay fresh after the gym, after toiling away in the attic fighting with Christmas decorations and running with the dog. The Dude Wipes clean and refresh my face, my armpits and of course, the “under-carriage”. I have bought more of the Wipes and will NOT be giving them away anytime soon. Throw one in your pocket, your gym bag, your luggage and your overnight bag. You will not regret it. – Link
Soft on me booty and booty hole like angels made of feathers were playing sqaush in me outback the whole time – Link
Exactly what I was looking for. I run half marathons, and I do wear thicker underwear. This product gives me that extra clean filling, and confidence I want when sitting around after a race just chatting with friends. Take one pouch put it in my front pocket, and no one notices it. After race excuse myself to the rest room, and freshen up with just one packet. Yes I do recommend this for anyone from tailgating to actually competing in an event. – Link
I love dude wipes and have been using for over 9 months. I took them to Korea when it was really humid and they fit great in the wallet and perfect for a quick cleanup or mudbutt incidents. I wish the smell was a little less baby wipe ish but other than that great price and quality. – Link
But not all reviewers felt Dude Wipes left their butt holes sparkling clean:
With the nice modern image and masculine name, I expected a wipe that would have some sort of masculine scent to it. Upon receipt, I was surprised to find out they smell very much like an baby wipe. Not worth it. – Link
packaging looks great but the scent is not manly at all. Its like they repackaged women’s wet wipes. I imagined a larger wet wipe that has a manly cologne. – Link
I’ve rated these wipes so low, because they are the exact same flushable wipes you can buy in the walmart aisle for 97 cents. I thought it would be a nice thing to have just get you through to the next shower if you’re on the go and not in anyone’s personal space, but these are really just for wiping your backside post-defecation. Only ten bucks, but don’t waste your money. The description says for wiping your… FACE!? pre and post workout. True, it probably won’t kill you, but I expected more. (I think Old Spice used to make something closer to what I was looking for that I would use after gym class in high school, but these are NOT THAT!).. just some classic “butt wipes” that they’ve apparently mislabeled (intentionally or unintentionally). Just to further my point:
The back of the box says, “Still wiping with just toilet paper and putting yourself through a daily dose of torture?”
The product arrived in an unmarked clear plastic bag, quantity 100 bulk plasti-foil packs, so you will have to find a storage container for about a half gallon’s volume. My frame of reference was the Cottonnelle individual packs I have used for years. Nothing like going through life with two packs in your left front pocket to ensure a day filled with only good experiences. The Dude Wipes are the same size, and will fit the pocket the same way. The fragrance is non-offensive, like Cottonnelle. They say they are flushable but make no septic systems claim, while Cottonnelle does say they are septic tank compatible. Dude Wipes cost me more and I don’t see any reason to prefer them. I do think the wrap is more macho manly that the cute Cottonnelle Golden Retriever puppy, but this is a function I always take care of in solitude….
Less functional with no advantages and a higher cost. My last purchase of this product. –Link
After reading all the reviews, Dude Wipes–as an idea–seem like a convenience guys could use. As a product, however, they appear to be an overpriced marketing gimmick aimed that the kind of Dude Bros who watch MMA (or at least used to watch MMA back during the boom). Still, we’re going to reserve judgement until we can actually get our hands (and butt cheeks) on a set of them. And like we said, the ad placement on Woodley’s butt got the product trending on Twitter, and even got us to write an article about it. So hats off to Dude Wipes, arguably the most successful bizarre sponsor in MMA since Dynamic Fastener.
On a more serious note, what does it say about the UFC’s product when a glorified baby wipe is drawing more attention than the fights?
. I highly recommended this product. Especially great for boating or camping. –