Sad Video of The Day: Lyoto Machida Now Drinking Urine of Complete Strangers

(Props: Panico na Band via Magnum1977)

Ok, we’re starting to suspect that Lyoto Machida‘s piss-drinking habit has more to do with exhibitionism than supposed health benefits. That the former UFC light heavyweight champion learned to drink urine from his father (writing that sentence just gave me the creeps) is well documented. It is clear now, however, that Lyoto’s urine addiction is out of control.

No longer does he partake solely within the confines of secure training environments where the waste liquid he ingests can be trusted to be “clean,” as the video evidence above shows Machida is now drinking the urine of complete strangers. That is, as long as they drink his urine as well. Clearly, this has all just become a game to pee-pee party boy Lyoto. Sad.

And, no more jokes — this is just gross.

Who could have guessed that this is what “The Machida Era” would entail. We’re not saying his golden showers are directly contributing to his lackluster performances in recent years, but how could they be helping?

What do you think, nation? Is this more or less disgusting/erotic than Joe Rogan forcing blonde chicks to guzzle donkey semen? And, will this writer ever be able to redeem himself after cashing checks for writing about both of these episodes? Our answers: More disgusting, less erotic, and no.

By the way, the woman featured in this clip is Pânico na TV reporter Sabrina Sato whose resume includes “having her body covered with bees, lighting candles by fart, being buried alive, allowing a scorpion to sting her on her bare backside, belching the lyrics to songs/ stories, and even eating bugs.” WIFE MATERIAL.

Elias Cepeda


(Props: Panico na Band via Magnum1977)

Ok, we’re starting to suspect that Lyoto Machida‘s piss-drinking habit has more to do with exhibitionism than supposed health benefits. That the former UFC light heavyweight champion learned to drink urine from his father (writing that sentence just gave me the creeps) is well documented. It is clear now, however, that Lyoto’s urine addiction is out of control.

No longer does he partake solely within the confines of secure training environments where the waste liquid he ingests can be trusted to be “clean,” as the video evidence above shows Machida is now drinking the urine of complete strangers. That is, as long as they drink his urine as well. Clearly, this has all just become a game to pee-pee party boy Lyoto. Sad.

And, no more jokes — this is just gross.

Who could have guessed that this is what “The Machida Era” would entail. We’re not saying his golden showers are directly contributing to his lackluster performances in recent years, but how could they be helping?

What do you think, nation? Is this more or less disgusting/erotic than Joe Rogan forcing blonde chicks to guzzle donkey semen? And, will this writer ever be able to redeem himself after cashing checks for writing about both of these episodes? Our answers: More disgusting, less erotic, and no.

By the way, the woman featured in this clip is Pânico na TV reporter Sabrina Sato whose resume includes “having her body covered with bees, lighting candles by fart, being buried alive, allowing a scorpion to sting her on her bare backside, belching the lyrics to songs/ stories, and even eating bugs.” WIFE MATERIAL.

Elias Cepeda

UFC 135 Fan Q&A: Rashad Evans Discusses Tonight’s Main Event, Espionage, and Peeing in the Cage

(Video courtesy of zpzp420 on Vimeo)

If there’s one thing the UFC does well, it’s making its stars available to the fans. Well, actually, it’s probably putting on mixed martial arts fights, but the UFC is pretty good at making its stars available to fans as well. These fan Q&A sessions give us a chance to see a fighter’s true personality, sometimes even many of his personalities. Yesterday’s session with Rashad Evans is true to form: you’ve got the usual goofball fans asking for a staredown, the requisite racially insensitive remark (no, not from Rashad, this time), and even a frank, thought-provoking discussion on the very-real problem of in-cage urination.

If you don’t have time to watch, we took notes. Check out some quotes after the jump.

(Video courtesy of zpzp420 on Vimeo)

If there’s one thing the UFC does well, it’s making its stars available to the fans. Well, actually, it’s probably putting on mixed martial arts fights, but the UFC is pretty good at making its stars available to fans as well. These fan Q&A sessions give us a chance to see a fighter’s true personality, sometimes even many of his personalities. Yesterday’s session with Rashad Evans is true to form: you’ve got the usual goofball fans asking for a staredown, the requisite racially insensitive remark (no, not from Rashad, this time), and even a frank, thought-provoking discussion on the very-real problem of in-cage urination.

 

On whether he’d rather face Rampage or Bones (1:20):

“I would rather fight Jon Jones. I mean, you know because, we have our issues and stuff. The situation with the whole Greg Jackson thing, and the [camp] splitting up. I’d rather fight him.”

 

When asked to snap a photo,Goldberg maintains the company’s firm stance on political correctness (4:10)

“My wife’s the Asian one, but I can take a picture”. (“Ooohs” from the crowd) “She knows she’s Asian. Don’t ‘ohhh’ me. She knows.”

 

On what makes Jon Jones dangerous (6:30)

“One thing that makes Jon good is the fact that he’s so young he just throws anything and he does that because he has no fear. But, the longer he fights, he’s going to establish more fear. He’s going to fight a little more conservative, and when you start fighting a little more conservative, start thinking about your moves, then that’s when you see a slight hesitation, and then he’s going to be like everybody else. But right now he’s so young he’ll do something that makes no sense, like you wouldn’t even do it because it makes no sense. But he does it, he has the balls enough to do it and he pulls it off because no one expects him to do it.”

 

On Rampage’s assertion that Jones hasn’t fought anyone (13:05)

“He hasn’t had those epic battles like Rampage and stuff, but you can’t deny that the kid definitely put in work. It’s hard to say, you can’t take away what he’s done. He hasn’t fought all the top guys in the weight class, but he did destroy Shogun, though. He did destroy Shogun. He’s been running through people, so you can’t deny that the kit put in work, but I do agree with Rampage that he hasn’t really put in the kind of work that he has.”

 

What he would bring to cage against Jones that “Bones” didn’t already see in training camp (15:50):

“I don’t really got to bring anything more than what he’s already seen at training camp, because that was enough then and I think it will be enough later on. And that’s a promise.”

 

On what he learned from the loss to Machida (31:00):

“Well, I wouldn’t sit around and watch, for one. For two, I won’t be talking when I’m getting rained on with punches. I can get hurt; I’m not invincible. I learned I’m not invincible. Going into that fight I think I would just be more aggressive. And that’s what I was saying earlier. When you go into a fight sometimes you’re so worried about what other people are doing that you’re not really doing your gameplan. And by you sitting there, watching them, you take your own self out of your game. So sometimes when you’re in a fight with someone who’s a little bit confusing or a little bit quirky you just got to go for yours and see what happens after that.”

 

His take on the “Spygate” saga (32:30):

“I think they did it, but I don’t think Jon was really a part of it. I think it was just that Malki, his manager, knew someone that was there and he was trying to get information from him. But I don’t think that Jon was in on the plan or really knew where Malki was getting his information from. I don’t think, but I could be wrong. They definitely found somebody doing it, though.”

 

Undoubtedly inspired by our recent feature on fighting through adversity, Rashad leaks a secret about his TUF fight with Brad Imes (50:00):

“During that fight, I was so tired. I peed myself. No I swear, I did, it’s embarrassing to say, but I did. Because I was so tired, I was just like, I just let it go.”

UFC 125: Thiago Silva Admits Trying to Cheat Urine Test, Will Accept Punishment

It seems as if the long, sordid tale of Thiago Silva and his drug test from UFC 125 is coming to a close. Silva took to the UnderGround Forum to release the following statement: We make decisions every day of our lives. Some are good and some are bad. …

It seems as if the long, sordid tale of Thiago Silva and his drug test from UFC 125 is coming to a close. Silva took to the UnderGround Forum to release the following statement: We make decisions every day of our lives. Some are good and some are bad. When you make a bad decision, […]

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UFC 125: Thiago Silva Admits Trying to Cheat Urine Test, Will Accept Punishment