Author: By Dan Downes

This week opens inside the Team Nelson locker room, where Julian Lane is devastated after losing last week’s fight. Michael Hill understands why his teammate is so upset and blames Coach Roy. He says that drawing straws to decide who fights next is just plain dumb. Inside the Team Carwin locker room, victorious Bristol Marunde’s cut-up face serves as a reminder to never underestimate your opponent. Mike Ricci says they’d all expected Bristol to run through Julian, and now look at him.

Back at the house, both teams are discussing what we will now refer to as “Strawgate.” Even enemy-maker Matt Secor can’t believe it. His coaches are watching film deciding who has the best shot to win and  Roy Nelson picks straws. However, even this analysis doesn’t win Matt any friends. He calls Julian “not smart,” and a still-emotional Julian warns people not to [expletive] with him because he’ll fight somebody that and get himself sent home.

After Matt responds with some flatulence, Julian he almost makes good on his promise. He gets in Matt’s face and does your usual come-at-me-bro posturing that you see outside a frat bar. To his credit, Secor walks away. Later Julian admits that he was out of line… which is not to say he apologized for his actions.

Cut to Team Nelson’s training, where Cameron Diffley approaches Roy about their schedule. The fighters are still upset that they are only training once a day and would like to train more. To the camera Roy tells us that he thinks he’s a good coach and that he’s been around long enough to know how to make guys successful. Colton Smith has his coach’s back and says that people need to take personal responsibility for themselves if they have holes or extra cardio they need to improve.

Michael Hill adds another complaint, this one about the coaches taking their sweet time in the gym. Hill thinks they talk too much before practice and waste time. Something tells me that Roy Nelson, Gilbert Melendez and Jake Shields didn’t get to where they are today by wasting time.

Fight Selection
It’s time for the fight selection, and Team Carwin decides to pit rascally Team Nelsonite Nic Herron-Webb against their very own Igor Araujo. Carwin explains that the two are equally matched in the grappling world, but Igor possesses the striking advantage. Roy figures that Igor will shoot in, and Nic will control the ground game from there. Ricci is absolutely ecstatic. He can’t wait to see Nic get smashed. Hell hath no fury like a Tobey Maguire-lookalike scorned. Igor and Nic then have an intense/bizarre staredown which culminates in Igor saying, “I want to eat some brains.”

Back at the house we learn more about Igor Araujo the person. He trains in Albuquerque with Team Jackson/Winkeljohn. A Brazilian jiu-jitsu black belt, he started competing in MMA because he was short on rent money, and now he has 23 career wins. Also, he could really use a new sweatsuit.

After practice, Team Carwin returns to the house where Mike Ricci discovers that his mattress is missing. He immediately confronts Nic Herron-Webb and tells him to go retrieve his bed. Nic has no interest and refuses to help. Instead, he stands and watches with glee as Ricci and some friends finagle the mattress down from the top of the gazebo where it was hidden.

We then hear the Nic Herron-Webb story. Only 22 years old, he’s the creator of Nap jitsu. It is thusly named because it “puts people to sleep.” How this differs from regular jiu-jitsu? I think you have to send a check or money order to find that out.

We learn a little but more about each fighter’s inspiration. Igor says he’s one of the fighters here to fight for “bread and milk” –  he’s thinking about his family and his son’s second birthday he’s missing. He needs to win TUF to give his family opportunity and financial security. Nic Herron-Webb keeps most of his personal life close to the chest and talks about Alaskan pride.

Fight Time
The round begins with Nic throwing a wide left hook. Igor ducks, shoots in and puts Nap-Time Herron-Webb right on his back. Nic attempts some rubber guard, but Igor stacks him and moves to half guard. Soon, Igor advances again gets full mount. Nic tries to walk over to the cage to use it to get some leverage, but is stifled. He then gives up his back and Igor flattens him out. The rest of the round is spent with Igor throwing punches and attempting chokes. Nic avoids getting submitted, but that’s about it. Nic manages to roll Igor just as the round ends.

Round two: Igor throws a head kick then shoots in immediately. This time, though, Nic uses a kimura to sweep and get off his back. He throws a big elbow from top and Igor’s face swells. Igor controls Nic’s wrists, which stymies any more offense from the top. With about two minutes left, Igor sweeps Nic and regains top position. Igor tries to pass Nic’s guard but, but finds himself in a leg lock. Nic uses this to sweep and finishes the round on top of his opponent.

Everyone expects there to be a third round, but the judges give Igor the majority decision victory. Dana actually says Nic got “robbed” of a third sudden-victory round but also calls him out for not capitalizing from top position. Igor is particularly proud to have scored the win on his son’s birthday. Coach Carwin says that Igor took the first 10-8 to earn the win and Coach Nelson offers the standard “You can’t leave it in the hands of the judge,” analysis.

The show ends with a preview of next week’s episode. Who is the
mysterious chicken thief? What event causes Roy Nelson to yell at his
team? Who will be the next person to threaten Matt Secor? Find out next
week on The Ultimate Fighter! Until then here’s the season at a glance:

Team Carwin (3-1)
Sam Alvey (0-1, lost to Joey Rivera by decision in episode 3)
Bristol Marunde (1-0, defeated Julian Lane by decision in episode 4)
Mike Ricci
Neil Magny (1-0, defeated Cameron Diffley by decision in episode 2)
James Chaney
Eddy Ellis
Igor Araujo (1-0, defeated Nic Herron-Webb by majority decision in episode 5)
Matt Secor

Team Nelson (1-3)
Dom Waters
Michael Hill
Cameron Diffley (0-1, lost to Neil Magny by decision in episode 2)
Colton Smith
Jon Manley
Nic Herron-Webb (0-1, lost to Igor Araujo by majority decision in episode 5
Joey Rivera (1-0, defeated Sam Alvey by decision in episode 3)
Julian Lane (0-1, lost to Bristol Marunde by decision in episode 4)

In the meantime, be sure to follow me on Twitter @dannyboydownes the
show @TUFonFX and check out some of my other work here.

That’s right boys and girls, Danny Boy back for the hottest thing on the internet since Gagnam Style — the Downes Side. Its accompanying dance hasn’t been invented yet, but whatever it is I’m sure it’ll be great 60% of the time.

Speaking of dancing, the UFC waltzes into Minneapolis, Minnesota for UFC on FX 5 live from the Target Center. The main event features a heavyweight contest between Travis “Hapa” Brown and Antonio “Bigfoot” SIlva. The co-main event of the evening features a rematch six years in the making as UFC 151 refugees Jake “The Juggernaut” Ellenberger and Jay “Thoroughbred” Hieron finally meet again.

Justin Edwards (7-2) vs Josh Neer (33-11-1)
The main card begins in the welterweight division with an experience gap more noticeable than Mighty Mouse at a Men’s Big & Tall. Forty-five-fight veteran Josh “The Dentist” Neer looks to rebound from a loss after riding a late resurgence that’s made his current UFC stint the most successful stretch of his career so far. His opponent is TUF alum and uncreative nickname holder Justin “Fast Eddy” Edwards. Coming off a loss  to John Maguire November, he’s looking for the biggest win of his resume. Capable all around, his strength is the submission game, where he holds the majority of his wins.

Despite his 1-2 record in the Octagon, Edwards has never been in a boring fight. Unfortunately, that won’t help him against The Dentist. He’s simply overmatched here. Neer has only been submitted twice since 2006 and his striking ability far exceeds his opponent’s. Edwards’ huge heart and tenacity has helped him in previous fights, but all it’ll help him here is to take damage. Neer will beat him up on the feet, do some of his patented dental work, and finally put him away in the 2nd round.

John Dodson (13-5) vs Jussier “Formiga” da Silva (14-1)
We drop down to the flyweights for Jussier da Silva and John “The Magician” Dodson. The top 125-lb. prospect from Brazil, da Silva makes his UFC debut with seven wins via submission, five of those coming in the opening frame. After winning the TUF 14 finale with a huge TKO over T.J. Dillashaw, John Dodson decided to drop down a division and won his debut there as well.

Formiga may be a hot prospect, but one always has to take these records with a level of skepticism. His opponents have been some high-level guys (like Ian McCall) but he’s also fought his share of cans. While he does have top-level BJJ, he won’t be able to get Dodson to the ground to use it. “The Magician” has the ability to keep this fight on the feet and that’s where he’ll take control. He’ll stall da Silva’s grappling game en route to the decision victory and find himself next in line to fight Demetrious Johnson for the flyweight title.

Jake Ellenberger (27-6) vs Jay Hieron (23-5)
The next match is the early favorite for Fight of the Night as Jake “The Juggernaut” Ellenberger takes on Jay “Thoroughbred” Hieron. After winning six in a row, Ellenberger had his title shot hopes dashed with a well placed knee from Martin Kampmann in June. Hieron may be returning to the UFC for the first time in 7 years, but he’s 9-1 in his last ten fights and no stranger to high-level competition. Strong all around, he does possess Division I wrestling experience and an underrated submission game. He also handed Ellenberger his first career defeat when the two originally met in 2006.

It’s an obvious point to make, but Jake Ellenberger is not the same fighter he was in 2006. With a right hand that’s one of the most devastating in the division, he’s refined his entire game. Hieron needs to fight conservatively in the opening frame and not over-engage. He has to bring Ellenberger into the later rounds, where he’s shown a propensity of gassing. Despite that, my money (metaphorical, of course) is on Ellenberger. Hieron’s striking defense leaves holes and Ellenberger has the power to end a fight with a single strike. He gets the TKO in the 2nd.

Travis Browne (13-0-1) vs Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva (16-4)
That brings us to the main event of the evening. With the heavyweight division up for grabs, whoever wins this fight could jump to the front of the line with an impressive win. Undefeated in the UFC, Browne recently rolled through Chad Griggs with a first-round arm triangle. On a two-fight losing streak, Bigfoot has had a rough go, most recently losing in the first round against Cain Velasquez.

The real question here is Silva’s mental state of mind. The fight takes place on the 11th anniversary of a life-altering event in his personal life. Confidence and sasquatch jokes aside, speed will be the deciding factor here. Bigfoot has the clear grappling advantage, but he won’t be able to get his hands on Browne to make it happen. Brown will tag Silva with a couple shots, then move away to avoid the tie-up. Furthermore, the Velasquez fight showed us that when Silva gets put on his back, he should change his nickname to Turtle. This happens in the third round and Travis Browne earns the TKO victory.

That wraps up another edition of the world-renowned Downes Side. Be sure to check me out on Twitter  @dannyboydownes and leave comments, predictions or choreography tips on the page as well. Just don’t suggest the Achy Breaky Heart line dance. I already perfected that in the 90s.

After recapping last week’s fight, we cut to the Team Nelson locker room for the reaction. Victorious underdog Joey Rivera can barely contain his excitement. Quoth the Boom Boom: “I’m so excited for the win…which is awesome.”

Coach Roy Nelson doesn’t waste any time deciding who will fight next; and by Coach Roy Nelson I mean straws. Whoever draws the short straw “wins” and can either fight next, or pass the short straw to a teammate. The eventual short-straw-holdee will fight next and can choose his opponent. He’s pretty open about this strategy, saying, “For me there was a lot of stress in picking who to fight.” And hey, no one gets into cage-fighting expecting there to be bumps in the road.

Michael Hill doesn’t seem too enthusiastic about this type of decision making but goes along with it anyway. Julian Lane (aka “The One With the Red Mohawk”) draws the short straw and decides not to trade it away. He then muses over who he’d like to fight and narrows it down to his in-house rival Matt Secor, Mike Ricci or Bristol Marunde.

Both teams are back at the UFC gym for Dana White’s big surprise. The fighters and coaches will get to venture out of their secluded mansion hole for private screening of Kevin James’ MMA based movie Here Comes the Boom. While I’m sure they all enjoyed the movie, I think they were more excited when Uncle Dana said that they could go to the concession stand and, “Get whatever you want.”

In the Gym
Cut to Team Nelson’s training session where there are some questions about Julian Lane’s cardio. Roy doesn’t believe that Lane came fully prepared and in shape. This is affirmed after  their second round of circuit training when Nelson asks, “Who wants to go a third?” and everyone agrees except Lane.

Then it’s time for the fight announcement. Lane decides to call out Bristol Marunde because he thinks Bristol is not a well-rounded fighter. Coach Carwin disagrees and tells us that he believes this is a great matchup for the more refined Marunde. As the two finish their staredown, Bristol simply says, “Big mistake,” to Julian who responds way too late with, “Yeah! For you!” It was a comeback that would have made George Costanza proud.

We then watch Team Carwin’s training session and they really don’t seem too concerned. The coaches claim that Lane is only a brawler and Bristol should be fine. Marunde may not be concerned about Lane’s technique, but he’s certainly worried about his weight cut. When he found out about the fight, he was 186 lbs. and doesn’t have much time to whittle his way down to 170. He claims that he’s not stressed about it, but you can tell he’s not 100% sure he’ll make weight.

Back at Team Nelson practice, Coach Roy shows some signs of frustration with Julian Lane. The coaches are trying to teach him some footwork within the Octagon that will prevent him from getting stalled against the fence, but Lane struggles. Nelson worries that if Lane doesn’t move and take the center of cage, Bristol will be able to hold  Julian against the cage and stifle his offense.

It’s time for weigh-ins and Bristol is the first one up. He steps on and the commissioner shouts out that he’s 170 lbs. “on the dot!” Julian says that he didn’t make weight because the scale was still unbalanced when the commissioner called it out. Conspiracy! He tells Roy Nelson and they talk it over a little bit and don’t do anything. Lane then gets up, makes weight and they have their staredown.

In the next segment, we begin to see the man behind the mohawk as Julian Lane tells us about his personal life. Unemployed with a daughter and another child on the way, Lane sees TUF as his chance to finally provide for his family. Bristol Marunde echoes the same sentiments as he talks about his son and how at 30 years of age, it’s make it or break it time for his MMA career.

Fight Time
Round one begins with each fighter throwing a couple wild punches. Bristol closes the gap and puts Lane against the cage, right where he shouldn’t be. No real damage occurs for over a minute, but then Marunde lands a knee to the body that causes Lane to cry out. They break their clinch and trade some big shots; Marunde starts to bleed from the bridge of the nose. He ties up Lane again, but soon has the hold broken. Already appearing gassed, Lane keeps retreating, looking to land a big haymaker right hand. With 20 seconds left, he shoots in, gets stuffed and suffers a couple nasty elbows to the body as time expires.

In between rounds Roy reminds Lane about their game plan and to focus on Octagon control; Team Carwin coaches tell Marunde to clinch even more.

As the second round begins, Lane immediately backs up. Bristol lands a couple of strong leg kicks that buckle his opponent. Lane continues to throw big overhand rights, fails to connect solidly and finds himself back on the fence. He fails an inside trip attempt, but uses it to take Bristol’s back. He doesn’t have the position for long, though, and winds up back against the cage. The round ends with Team Nelson trying to talk themselves into believing Julian took the second, but odds aren’t in their favor.

The decision comes and all the judges score it 20-18 for Bristol Marunde. Coach Nelson’s reaction is mixed credits Julian for winning the standup exchanges, but is clearly frustrated with the fact that Lane got himself pushed up against the cage. Dana’s chief criticism of the fight is that Marunde should have turned it up in the second round when he had Lane hurt with the leg kicks. Coach Carwin wishes Bristol had better closed the range and says Lane’s diminished cardio helped his fighter win.

After the fight, Roy Nelson decides it’s the right time to talk to Dana about Marunde’s alleged missed weight. He asks Dana if he wants him to “keep on eye out on the commission” in the future. A beside-himself Dana makes the RUFKM face shown to the right and says, “Well if the commission said [he’s 170], it’s true.” After some time for reflection,Dana shares his thoughts on Big Country’s suggestion: “ This guy says the dumbest [expletive] [expletive]. You can’t fix stupid.”

After the coaches’ reactions, we see the fighters themselves. Bristol gives the usual, “You’re gonna have to kill me to beat me blah blah blah,” story while Julian Lane shows a moment of vulnerability. The loss plus his economic situation finally overwhelm him and he breaks down crying in the locker room. “I ain’t got no money. I got nothin’. I let my daughter down.”

The sneak peek at next week’s episode raises a couple of important questions. Does
Julian Lane go off the deep end? Will Mike Ricci finally have enough of
Nic Herron-Webb? Does Roy Nelson show up in a Columbo coat to investigate the crooked commissioner? Find out this and more next week
on The Ultimate Fighter Fridays!

Team Carwin (2-1)
Sam Alvey (0-1, lost to Joey Rivera by decision in episode 3)
Bristol Marunde (1-0, defeated Julian Lane by decision in episode 4)
Mike Ricci
Neil Magny (1-0, defeated Cameron Diffley by decision in episode 2)
James Chaney
Eddy Ellis
Igor Araujo
Matt Secor

Team Nelson (1-2)
Dom Waters
Michael Hill
Cameron Diffley (0-1, lost to Neil Magny by decision in episode 2)
Colton Smith
Jon Manley
Nic Herron-Webb
Joey Rivera (1-0, defeated Sam Alvey by decision in episode 3)
Julian Lane (0-1, lost to Bristol Marunde by decision in episode 4)

In the meantime, be sure to follow me on Twitter @dannyboydownes the
show @TUFonFX and check out some of my other work here. And if you have any suggestions for how to best attempt to fix stupid, I’m sure Dana would be all ears.

After recapping the events of the previous week, the episode opens with Coach Carwin beaming (well, for him) like a proud poppa that his fighter picked up the win. He’s glad to have fight control and doesn’t plan on losing it soon. Coach Nelson hopes that the loss will spark a fire under his guys and force them to stay on their toes since any one of them could be in the Octagon next.

Back at the house, Colton Smith joins Julian Lane as members of the Matt Secor fan club. Smith tells Secor that he can’t wait to see him get his ass kicked while Secor retorts with a solid, “You were an ugly baby” burn. Nic Herron-Webb creates more household enemies when he decides that 2:00 am is the perfect time to play pool, whistle and jump rope outside people’s bedrooms. Mike Ricci comes out looking like a Calvin Klein model and asks him to knock it off. Ever the expert at analzying social situations, Matt Secor tells us that, “Nobody likes the kid.”

Cut to the UFC gym and it’s fight announcement time. Team Carwin decides to pit their number one pick Sam Alvey against Team Nelson’s Joey “Boom Boom” Rivera. Dana thinks this is a great choice. He believes that based on the fights to get in the house — in which Alvey scored an early knockout while Rivera struggled to go the distance — Smilin’ Sam will take this one easily.

After Heron-Webb receives more grief about his late-night antics — this time from his own teammates — we get a glimpse at the two fighters competing. Joey Rivera won’t earn himself a spot on the Arizona state tourism board with his statement that there isn’t much to do out there besides train or go to bars. Nelson seems as unimpressed with Rivera, saying that he’s a solid mixed martial artist, but doesn’t really shine at anything.

Sam Alvey tells us how he met his fiancé. It’s your usual cliched love story about an MMA fighter/purveyor of steak on a stick and an America’s Next Top Model winner/bodice vendor who meet at the Bristol Renaissance Faire. While Sam gushes about young love, Julian Lane, Colton Smith and Nic Herron-Webb take his mattress from his bedroom and float it on the pool outside. Sam just gives an “Aw shucks” laugh and ignores it. Igor Araujo finds this prank to be over the line and disrespectful. Bristol Marunde says it’s “bad karma” but neither one of them help to get it back and Sam ends up sleeping on the couch that night.

Weigh-ins are next where both fighters make weight, Rivera on the first try and Sam after dropping his gladiatorial leather undergarments. Fighters give their predictions ranging from Julian Lane’s, “Sam can’t handle that grown man strength,” to James Chaney’s, “I like Joey, but no way he wins.” After a commercial break, Joey Rivera TMIs about having sex before a fight and uses the words ejaculation and spiritual energy in the same sentence. Sam Alvey gives an equally profound thought with his strategy: “hit him harder and more often than he hits me.”

Fight Time
Round one begins with Joey Rivera throwing a big head kick that lands. He throws another head kick and lands that one, too. He continues the momentum by shooting in and getting the takedown. He soon takes Alvey’s back and goes for the rear naked choke. Alvey stands, Rivera releases the hooks and puts Alvey on his back again. Sam soon gets to his feet but then finds himself in an arm triangle. Working off the fence, Rivera locks a guillotine, Sam escapes but finds himself in another guillotine attempt. Alvey finally gets his head free and achieves top position with little time left. He gets a couple punches off before the bell, but round one is all Rivera.

Before the second round begins, you can see that Rivera is clearly gassed. Unfortunately, Alvey is unable to capitalize. They spend the majority of the round against the fence with Rivera holding Sam in a lazy standing guillotine attempt. After Herb Dean breaks them apart, Rivera stuns Sam with another head kick and puts him on his back. They both make it to their feet and then spend more time against the fence. Just like the first round, Alvey gets great top position towards the end, but the round ends before he can capitalize.

The judges’ scorecards come in and it’s Joey RIvera by majority decision (19-19, 20-18, 20-18). Alvey must still be dizzy because he thinks he won both rounds and blocked the head kicks. In the locker rooms Shane Carwin speaks from the heart, saying, “It’s heart-wrenching for me to see one of our guys lose the possibility of their dream,” and somehow compares it to the Marine motto of leaving no man behind. Affable Roy Nelson attributes the Rivera victory to the fact that “he [expletive] listened.”

As the episode ends we get a sneak peak into next week’s show. Which Team Nelson member draws the short straw? What’s Dana White’s surprise? Who will win the presidency of the Matt Secor fan club? Find out next week! Until then, here’s the season at a glance.

Team Carwin (1-1)
Sam Alvey (0-1, lost to Joey Rivera by decision in episode 3)
Bristol Marunde
Mike Ricci
Neil Magny (1-0, defeated Cameron Diffley by decision in episode 2)
James Chaney
Eddy Ellis
Igor Araujo
Matt Secor

Team Nelson (1-1)
Dom Waters
Michael Hill
Cameron Diffley (0-1, lost to Neil Magny by decision in episode 2)
Colton Smith
Jon Manley
Nic Herron-Webb
Joey Rivera (1-0, defeated Sam Alvey by decision in episode 3)
Julian Lane

In the meantime, be sure to follow me on Twitter @dannyboydownes the
show @TUFonFX and check out some of my other work here. Also leave some
comments, thoughts or other strange places your mattresses have ended
up. I promise to [expletive] listen.

Don’t pinch yourself boy and girls, it’s time for the second Downes Side in as many weeks! Luckily I was still able to guide you all from the darkness this week despite the fact that Mitt Romney called me in to coach him for the US presidential debate in a couple days. The campaign thinks that my expertise in internet memes and cat pictures will help make him more relatable to the youth vote. Who am I to argue?

Meanwhile, in Nottingham England some of the world’s best fighters are busily preparing for UFC on FUEL TV 5 inside the Capital FM Arena. The main event of the evening features a heavyweight contest between Stefan “Skyscraper” Struve and Stipe Miocic. The division is up for grabs right now and the winner of this fight could really set themselves up nicely to climb up the ladder.

Che Mills (14-5) vs Duane Ludwig (21-13)
The main card kicks off (at 4 pm ET/1 pm PT, mind you) in the welterweight division with “Beautiful” Che Mills taking on Duane “Bang” Ludwig. Both fighters are looking to bounce back from knockout losses; Mills’ at the hands of Rory MacDonald while Ludwig ate a Dan Hardy counter hook in May.

This has to be the early favorite for fight of the night/knockout of the night. Both guys prefer to keep it standing and possess 17 KOs between the two of them. Mills will be the aggressor and the initiate the exchanges while Ludwig will sit back and try to counterstrike — a plan which earned him a victory against Amir Sadollah. Unfortunately, there are too many miles on “Bang” at this point in his career. He’s 2-4 in his current stint in the organization and doesn’t seem to have the explosiveness that earned him fastest KO in UFC history. Mills’ speed advantage will help him beat Ludwig to the punch and take this one by TKO in the 3rd round.

John Hathaway (16-1) vs John Maguire (18-3)
We remain in the welterweight division as John “HItman” Hathaway and John “The One” Maguire compete for the best Brit-on-Brit violence since the War of Roses. Hathaway holds a 6-1 record in the UFC after beating Pascal Krauss by decision in May. Maguire rides a seven-fight win streak, with his armbar victory of DaMarques Johnson in April earning him his tenth career submission victory.

Besides fighting for the title of England’s top welterweight, whoever wins this fight should find themselves in the top tier of the division as a whole. This fight boils down to who is the more well-rounded fighter. Maguire’s “gypsy jiu-jitsu” is certainly something to be concerned about, but Hathaway is that rare breed of English fighter who has wrestling competency. He’ll be able to dictate where he wants the fight to go and win the standup exchanges en route to a decision win.

Paul Sass (13-0) vs Matt Wiman (14-6)
We drop down to the lightweight division as submission ace Paul Sass looks to continue his climb in the division against “Handsome” Matt Wiman. Everyone knows Sass is a dangerous sub guy. He even submitted Mr. Charisma, Jacob Volkmann, at UFC 146, who thought it’d be a good idea to get the fight to the ground early against a guy who’s submitted 12 of his 13 opponents. Sidelined by injuries throughout his career, Wiman fights for the first time in 2012 and looks to finally enter upper echelon of the division.

Wiman’s greatest strength has been his ability to put fighters on their backs and grind them out. Despite the fact that he showed solid submission defense in his fight against Cole Miller, it would better serve him to use his wrestling to keep this fight on the feet. The “Sassangle” hasn’t shown much in the striking department, but why bother with a sub game that good? That’s like going to a steakhouse and ordering fish. Volkmann is a better wrestler than Wiman and the fact that even he couldn’t stop the the Sass-man’s submission does not bode well. This fight will eventually get on the ground, where Sass will work his magic and earn the tap in the 2nd round.

Brad Pickett (21-6) vs Yves Jabouin (18-7)
We head to the bantamweight division for Brad “One Punch” Pickett and Yves “Tiger” Jabouin. While he may be known for his willingness to stand and trade in the pocket, ten of Pickett’s career wins have come via submission. He showed those skills last April when he beat Damacio Page with a rear-naked choke. Since dropping down to 135, Jabouin (a Tristar Gym product) has been on a roll with three straight wins.

“Tiger” has experienced a resurgence in the bantamweight division, but two of those wins have come by controversial split decisions against opponents of a lesser caliber than Pickett. Jabouin will start fast and strong, but he doesn’t possess the firepower to put away his opponent. As the fight goes on, Jabouin will fade and Pickett will get stronger. “One Punch” will stun Yves in the second, get the takedown and finish him with a rear-naked choke. Then you will all turn on your television’s closed captioning system for the post fight interview. I’m hoping to learn some cool new slang.

Dan Hardy (24-10) vs Amir Sadollah (6-3)
That brings us to the co-main event of the evening as Dan “The Outlaw” Hardy looks to impress his countrymen against Amir Sadollah. Hardy finally returned to the win column with that aforementioned KO of Duane Ludwig at 146. Sadollah lost a decision to Duane Ludwig two fights ago, but was able to squeak out a split decision win over Jorge Lopez in May.

Predicting fights based on common opponents rarely works…except in this case. Hardy has shown that he has the power to alter a fight with one punch while his opponent does not. Sadollah does possess a strong sambo background that could get Hardy on his back, but I don’t see him being able to hold him. Everyone praises Sadollah’s clinch game, but it will only help him survive a Dan Hardy onslaught as he loses by decision.

Stefan Struve (24-5) vs Stipe Miocic (9-0)
That brings us to the main event of the evening. After a vicious KO at the hands of Travis Browne, Stefan Struve — now seven feet tall — has been on a roll, finishing three fights in a row against Pat Barry, Dave Herman and Lavar Johnson. A former Golden Gloves boxer and NCAA wrestler and baseball player, undefeated Stipe Miocic has a three-fight UFC win streak of his own. Plus, he has an easier time buying blue jeans.

Every Struve fight of the last year reads the same: He’s walking into a fight where people think that he’ll be outmatched in terms of strength and standup. Every time, though, he’s proven the doubters wrong (yours truly included). Miocic does possess the biggest grappling challenge for Struve so far, but he’s risen to the occasion his last three fights and it’ll continue here. Miocic will put Struve on his back in the 2nd, but “Skyscraper” will  find a way to put those big legs around his neck and get the triangle choke victory.

That wraps up another elucidating edition of the Downes Side. Be sure to follow me on Twitter @dannyboydownes. Also, make sure to add your own predictions, thoughts and favorite appetizers on the page. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have more cat photos to uncover.

That’s right boys and girls, you shall wander in the darkness no longer because Danny Boy Downes is back with another edition of the Downes Side! A lot has happened since the last time we were together over a month ago: UFC 151 disappeared, main events have changed and Dr. Phil McGraw celebrated his 62nd birthday.

Even without Dr. Phil’s assistance, the show will go on and UFC 152 comes to the Air Canada Centre in Toronto Saturday night with  Benavidez vs. Johnson Jones vs. Machida 2 Jones vs. Belfort. The main event features fan favorite Jon Jones as he battles Vitor Belfort to keep his light heavyweight title. In the co-main event of the evening, Joseph Benavidez and Demetrious Johnson compete for the first ever UFC flyweight championship.

Cub Swanson (17-5) vs Charles Oliveira (16-2)
The main card kicks off in the featherweight division as Greg “Sport Killer” Jackson product Cub “KO of the Night” Swanson faces off against Brazilian submission ace Charles “Do Bronx” Oliveira. Finally able to avoid training camp injuries, Swanson has looked like a world beater in his last two TKO wins over George Roop and Ross Pearson. Oliveira also has also looked strong in his last two bouts, defeating Eric Wisely with a calf cutter in January and handing Jonathan Brookins his first-ever submission loss last June.

This boils down to whether or not Do Bronx can get this fight to the ground. Even though Swanson has only tapped out once since 2007, Oliveira’s grappling skills are on a whole different level. Unfortunately for the Sao Paulo native, he’ll be standing longer than people at the DMV line (that’s still topical right?). Thanks to his fan favorite coach, Swanson will be patient and tag Oliveira without committing too much to make himself vulnerable to the takedown. He’ll utilize straight punches and quick flurries to earn himself a decision win.

Matt Hamill (10-4) vs Roger Hollett (13-3)
Next we head to the light heavyweight division as Matt “The Hammer” Hamill takes on Roger “The Hulk” Hollett. After back to back losses to Rampage Jackson and Alexander Gustafsson, Hamill looks to get back in the win column after what has to qualify as the shortest retirement in UFC history. Hollett makes his UFC debut riding a five-fight win streak. An aggressive fighter, only four of his career fights have made it out of the first round.

Whenever a fighter has an extended layoff, you have to question their conditioning as “Cage Corrosion” is much more than the next YouTube sensation. Luckily for Hamill he’s making his return against someone whose wins have mostly come via submission. Hollett has never faced someone with the Hammer’s wrestling skills and won’t be able to get him in a vulnerable position to finish. Hamill will pin the “Hulk” up against the fence, finish the takedown and show everyone why he’s the only man who’s been able to defeat Jon Jones (too soon?). TKO in the 2nd.

Michael Bisping (23-4) vs Brian Stann (12-4)
We drop down to middleweight as “Likable” Michael Bisping looks to move another rung closer to the number-one contender spot against Brian “All-American” Stann. Despite a loss to Chael Sonnen in January, Bisping rides a lot of momentum into the fight. Speaking of momentum, Brian Stann has won four of his last five fights (finishing all of them) showcasing the power that has earned him nine career knockouts.

This is a clash of two very different strikers. Stann is a heavy-handed boxer who uses his brute strength and KO power to overwhelm opponents. A more technical kickboxer, Bisping throws more combos and doesn’t seek the big single KO punch. In the grappling department, Bisping gave Chael Sonnen (the best wrestler in the UFC) all he could handle. Stann doesn’t come anywhere close to that. After learning his lesson from the Dan Henderson fight, Bisping will avoid the big right hand, counter effectively and probably even work in a few takedowns of his own. Stann is not one to go away easily and will have flashes here and there of turning the tide, but it won’t be enough. The Count takes this one with 30-27s across the board. The performance won’t earn him a title shot, but his post fight interview will give Josh Koscheck a run for his money for the title of most beloved fighter.

Joseph Benavidez (16-2) vs Demetrious Johnson (15-2-1)
That brings us to the co-main event of the evening. After a slight delay caused by an Australian judge’s poor arithmetic, Joseph Benavidez and Demetrious “Mighty Mouse” Johnson will finally decide who becomes UFC flyweight champion. Undefeated against anyone not named Dominick Cruz, Benavidez may be known for his guillotine choke, but he’s also shown knockout power, most recently in his semi-final match against Yasuhiro Urushitani. Johnson’s speed and workrate are what helped him earn a spot in the finals. His ability to transition from striking to takedowns has given all his opponents tremendous difficulty.

Both fighters are extremely well-rounded, but you have to give the edge to Benavidez in every department. He has the strength and wrestling to match Johnson grappling and holds a distinct power advantage in the striking department. The rounds will be fast-paced, entertaining and close, but Benavidez will be able to outland Johnson on the feet and negate his takedown attempts. If the flyweight division has shown us anything, it’s been that all of them are hard to put away…except this time. The fight will enter the championship rounds, Mighty Mouse will get more desperate to get the finish and find himself in the aforementioned guillotine choke. Joe B. gets submission in the fourth and sets up Bisping/Benavidez match we’ve been waiting to see.

Jon Jones (16-1) vs Vitor Belfort (21-9)
Now time for the main event! Jon Jones has taken some heat lately for his actions outside the cage, but nobody can deny what he’s done inside it. “Bones” has shown why he’s one of the most dangerous strikers in MMA with dominant wins over names like Rashad Evans, Rampage Jackson, Lyoto Machida and Mauricio Rua. Looking to derail the hype train is the self-proclaimed “young dinosaur” Vitor Belfort. For someone who made his UFC debut in 1997, Belfort finds himself in the position to achieve the most important accomplishment of his entire career.

Even considering Belfort makes the jump to light heavyweight for the first time in years, “The Phenom” still possesses knockout power. That being said, Jones never seems to put himself in vulnerable positions on the feet. Vitor will make it out of the first round, but he’ll push too hard for the big shot, Jones will counter him and that’ll be the end of it. After rolling through Vitor, no one knows what’ll be next for the 25 year old champ, but one thing’s for sure — people will have plenty to say about it.

Well that wraps up another much anticipated edition of the Downes Side. Be sure to follow me on twitter @dannyboydownes and check out some of my other writing here. Also, be sure to leave your queries, comments and list other things you’ve been longing to tell me during my absence.