“That man is the least believable tough guy in the history of cinema.” — True Geordie on Jake Gyllenhaal
Hollywood was determined to bring us a remake of Road House, the 1989 classic starring the late Patrick Swayze. When the first attempt crashed and burned, a direct result of Ronda Rousey’s knockout loss to Holly Holm at UFC 193, the project bounced around development hell until late 2022, thanks to the box office clout of Jake Gyllenhaal.
Unfortunately, influencers like True Geordie (real name Brian Davis) remain unimpressed.
“The only people who can suspend belief enough to believe Jake Gyllenhaal is capable of being Bruce Lee are like virgins and WWE fans,” Davis said. “He was far more believable as a gay cowboy. This is actually a remake of a trashy but classic old school movie featuring Patrick Swayze who was actually believable in that movie. Some people just have the aura of, ‘I could just kick your ass.’ This Jake fella doesn’t have that, which is probably why they brought in Conor McGregor, who can kick people’s ass — just can’t act, unfortunately.”
Former UFC two-division champion Conor McGregor will star as “Knox,” the main antagonist who can be seen warring with Gyllenhaal’s character in the first trailer. “Notorious” drew early praise from Marshall Teague, who played “Jimmy” opposite Swayze’s “Dalton” in the original film.
“This is the dumbest movie I ever heard of. ‘Conor’s on the gear again, we’ll work it in, just keep rolling, we’ll work it out in the edit.’ It’s so s—t,” Davis continued. “He doesn’t sound remotely believable. I don’t even want to hate this. Like this whole, ‘I hate Conor McGregor’ thing — I don’t, honestly. I want it it to be good. It’s f—king trash and that’s when you know it’s bad. It’s gonna be a horrendous movie. As much as I’ll hate that movie, I’m glad Conor has something to do with himself, because it doesn’t look like he’s fighting anytime soon.”
Road House streams March 21 on Prime Video.