Tech billionaire Elon Musk is prepared to end the invasion of Ukraine by battling Russian President Vladimir Putin in “single combat,” whatever that means, with the hopes of achieving world peace. Whether or not this would be a fight to the death remains unclear.
“I hereby challenge Vladimir Putin to single combat,” Musk wrote on Twitter. “Stakes are Ukraine. Do you agree to this fight?”
Think Two Tribes from Frankie Goes to Hollywood — but with more Teslas.
YouTube star-turned-combat sports promoter Jake Paul is prepared to stage the Musk-Putin fight inside the ring, which I’m confident would break every boxing pay-per-view (PPV) record in existence.
Might be worth it just to compensate the victims in Ukraine.
“10,000 retweets and I’ll make Elon Musk vs. Vladimir Putin boxing match happen,” Paul responded. “Undercard: Kanye West vs. Pete Davidson. Me vs. Conor McGregor In MMA.”
Dmitry Rogozin, director general of Russia’s Roscosmos space program and former Russian ambassador to NATO, believes Musk has to work his way up to a fight against Putin. To be fair, you don’t just drop a quarter into the arcade machine and fight Shang Tsung right out of the gate, you first need to prove yourself worthy.
“You, little devil, are still young,” Rogozin wrote. ”Compete with me weakling. It would only be a waste of time. Overtake my brother first.”
Rogozin previously fought in the Transnistria war against Moldovan forces.
“I see you are a tough negotiator!” Musk replied. “Okay, you can have 10 percent more pay-per-view money.”
I’m sure the people who are getting blown up and shot at in Ukraine will appreciate all the Twitter banter from Musk and Co., because this is 2022 and nothing is off limits when it comes to shameless self promotion.