Tag: Breaking the Law

Dana White Bravely Defends Asshole Jeremy Stephens From Accusations of Crime He Probably Committed

(Jeremy Stephens, shown here attempting to perform long division without a calculator.)

By George Shunick

So, Jeremy Stephens didn’t end up fighting on last night’s card. Instead, he spent the night in a jail cell, where he apparently has been denied bail.

Which is interesting, given that he is apparently is being “held on a two assault charges based on a 2011 incident in Des Moines, Iowa. One commanded $1,000 bail and the other $20,000.” Huh.

Anyway, this lack of coherence has infuriated the Baldfather, who had repeatedly tried to get Stephens out of jail in time for his fight and and claimed he was willing spend the amount of money it would take to free Charles Manson to do so. Like many things Dana White says, he may have been embellishing slightly.

While his support for his fighters is heartening and arguably the ethical course to take in these situations, Jeremy Stephens probably doesn’t deserve the benefit of the doubt in this case.

(Jeremy Stephens, shown here attempting to perform long division without a calculator.)

By George Shunick

So, Jeremy Stephens didn’t end up fighting on last night’s card. Instead, he spent the night in a jail cell, where he apparently has been denied bail.

Which is interesting, given that he is apparently is being “held on a two assault charges based on a 2011 incident in Des Moines, Iowa. One commanded $1,000 bail and the other $20,000.” Huh.

Anyway, this lack of coherence has infuriated the Baldfather, who had repeatedly tried to get Stephens out of jail in time for his fight and and claimed he was willing spend the amount of money it would take to free Charles Manson to do so. Like many things Dana White says, he may have been embellishing slightly.

While his support for his fighters is heartening and arguably the ethical course to take in these situations, Jeremy Stephens probably doesn’t deserve the benefit of the doubt in this case.

White goes on to say that he supports Jeremy Stephens in the latter’s upcoming legal battles, as he would any UFC fighter when they encounter legal trouble:

“Jeremy Stephens is a young kid, a young, dumb kid who made a mistake and made a bigger mistake by not taking care of it, but, he’s got a side to this story, everybody’s got their side of the story. I look at the problem and see what it is. I’m always going to believe my guy until I’m proven wrong. I’m always going to support the guys or girls who work for us. … There’s two sides to the story. I’m going to support my guy. You don’t have to be Rampage, or Jon Jones, or some of the big stars in the UFC, if you’re in the UFC and you’ve helped us and you’re a fighter here, I’m going to support you and I’m going to have your back, depending on how serious the situation is.”

On one hand, it’s admirable White is so willing to support his fighters no matter what. (Unless they’re accused of beating their wife. Or they make a rape joke on Twitter. Well, unless Dana likes you.) Technically, all of them are innocent until proven guilty to begin with.

Many of them, especially perennial undercard fighters like Stephens, need to fight in order to simply pay their bills. If the UFC didn’t back them and forced them to undergo legal proceedings on their own, they suffer serious financial repercussions, even though they may be innocent. And, like White claims, it appears the UFC does not discriminate in this regard between its superstars and the rest of its roster.

All in all, it’s the ethical approach to this situation from the major company.

That said, let’s be real here. Jeremy Stephens is not a “young, dumb kid.” He’s 26. He has a job.

Jeremy Stephens is not a dumb kid – he’s just dumb. In fact, he’s exceptionally dumb.

His nickname is “Lil’ Heathen” and he has a giant fucking cross on his back. Stephens probably saw an Affliction shirt at his local strip mall in Iowa with “Heathen” in some terrible font clearly intended to overcompensate for something, thought it looked really cool, asked one of his buddies to read it for him, and liked the way it sounded so much he made it his nickname. Come to think of it, his tattoo was probably inspired in a similar manner. (The words around his cross? “Only God Can Judge Me.” I’m sure the Des Moines district attorney is willing to put that to the test.)

Also, in addition to being stupid, Jeremy Stephens is an asshole.

Now, does this mean Jeremy Stephens is guilty? No.

But let’s stop pretending that he’s a victim of a justice system run wild. Jeremy Stephens’ assault case is stemming from last year.

He had time to deal with this beforehand and didn’t. Moreover, “A Des Moines police department spokesperson… said if [Stephens] had been arrested in Minnesota, it was because he missed his court date.” He brought this on himself – and, frankly, he brought Dana White, Yves Edwards and the UFC along with him by putting them through this mess. Because – I can’t stress this enough – he’s an idiot.

As for the charge itself, Stephens probably didn’t do himself any favors by – essentially – running from them for months. Even White, who has only heard Stephens’ side of the story, admits “there’s no doubt he’s responsible for the situation.” White adds a caveat that “he’s got a completely different story” from his accuser’s – shocking – but frankly, when you concede that a professional fighter is responsible for assaulting someone, it doesn’t look good.

As for the charges themelves, there’s virtually no information available on them. There’s a user on Reddit who claims Stephens beat another man badly and let a relative to take the fall instead, but the only evidence provided is a Facebook conversation. Not exactly a smoking gun.

So for now, Jeremy Stephens will remain in jail, Dana White will remain pissed, and we MMA fans will wonder just what the hell happened here. We’ll update you with more news when it becomes available, Potato Nation.

Chad Mendes Being Charged with Battery for Involvement in July Bar Fight


Props: Twitter.com/chadmendes

By George Shunick

When Chad Mendes was first accused of sucker punching a patron at a California bar during a brawl and fleeing from the cops, he dismissed the accuracy of the charges against him and stated he would cooperate fully with the investigation. In retrospect, that turned out to be a bad idea. Mendes was charged with battery yesterday, facing up to a $2,000 fine and 6 months in jail.

For those of you who missed this the first time, or have the memory span of a goldfish, here’s the official recap of what happened:

“Kings County Sheriff’s deputies say Mendes, a 27-year-old local native, sucker punched a man in the face at the Lacey Inn Bar on July 29. Leaving out the back door, he ran from law enforcement and managed to escape capture. But witnesses at the scene recognized the famous athlete. [Author’s note: people recognized “famous athlete” Chad Mendes!? MMA is finally mainstream!]

Deputies initially stopped at the bar around 1:18 a.m. in response to a call about two people fighting in the parking lot. After they pulled the men apart, about 40 more people decided to join in, turning it into a large brawl.


Props: Twitter.com/chadmendes

By George Shunick

When Chad Mendes was first accused of sucker punching a patron at a California bar during a brawl and fleeing from the cops, he dismissed the accuracy of the charges against him and stated he would cooperate fully with the investigation. In retrospect, that turned out to be a bad idea. Mendes was charged with battery yesterday, facing up to a $2,000 fine and 6 months in jail.

For those of you who missed this the first time, or have the memory span of a goldfish, here’s the official recap of what happened:

“Kings County Sheriff’s deputies say Mendes, a 27-year-old local native, sucker punched a man in the face at the Lacey Inn Bar on July 29. Leaving out the back door, he ran from law enforcement and managed to escape capture. But witnesses at the scene recognized the famous athlete. [Author’s note: people recognized “famous athlete” Chad Mendes!? MMA is finally mainstream!]

Deputies initially stopped at the bar around 1:18 a.m. in response to a call about two people fighting in the parking lot. After they pulled the men apart, about 40 more people decided to join in, turning it into a large brawl. 

Hanford police and the county Gang Task Force were called in to help break it up. When the dust settled, officers heard Mendes cursing and yelling at them. He showed signs of being intoxicated, Putnam said, and law enforcement asked him to leave. 

Instead, he turned and went back into the bar. That’s when he allegedly punched another patron.”

Obviously, the allegations are a blow to Mendes’ career. Not as big a blow as, say, a well-timed knee to the face. But a blow nonetheless. Even though these are solely allegations right now, it could adversely impact some of his sponsorship deals. His role as the rugged, masculine face of Edge Shave Gel could very well be in jeopardy. (Then again, maybe Mendes might want to consider keeping his face out of advertisement campaigns in the future. Fame doesn’t become him, it seems.)

However, it’s unlikely Mendes will spend any time in a jail cell as a result of this. The charges don’t seem to be too serious, and besides, Mendes has the resources to hire a legal team that’s more than capable of dealing with this. It’s likely the two sides will reach some type of settlement and the whole thing will blow over in a few months. That may sound a little optimistic to some of you, but if Mendes was able to avoid getting criminal charges filed for his brutalization of Cody McKenzie, he should be more than capable of beating these as well.

I’m Totally Up In This B*tch, You Guys

“Remember when ReX13 was just the goofy extra?”

Best part of being a not-at-all professional blogger contributing to this website? Being able to blatantly violate a CagePotato ban without fearing any reprisals from the powers that be. Because let’s face it, the expectations for yours truly are set lower than the credibility bar to be a 2012 Republican candidate in good ol’ ‘Merica. (Suck it, Dundas, i can pick low-hanging political fruit, too!) You bastards can expect plenty more rule-breaking from me in the future, because i color outside the lines. I’m a rebel. I walk on the wildside. I do not consistently capitalize self-referential pronouns. It’s just how i am. At least until BG and GusBuster pull my editing privileges–feel free to start a pool on how long i last, provided i can get in on the action.

“Remember when ReX13 was just the goofy extra?”

Best part of being a not-at-all professional blogger contributing to this website? Being able to blatantly violate a CagePotato ban without fearing any reprisals from the powers that be.  Because let’s face it, the expectations for yours truly are set lower than the credibility  bar to be a 2012 Republican candidate in good ol’ ‘Merica.  (Suck it, Dundas, i can pick low-hanging political fruit, too!)  You bastards can expect plenty more rule-breaking from me in the future, because i color outside the lines.  I’m a rebel. I walk on the wildside. I do not consistently capitalize self-referential pronouns. It’s just how i am.  At least until BG and GusBuster pull my editing privileges–feel free to start a pool on how long i last, provided i can get in on the action.

Some of you may have noticed that i haven’t been around much lately, and you may have heard a nasty rumor that i was hospitalized after taking part in an underground hotdog-eating contest that was unsanctioned by the Major League Eating government body.  I’d like to squash those rumors, but since my reported performance was on par with that Kobayashi cat, i’ll just let you all use your imaginations as to my status for the past month. 

Thanks to the weekend crew for soldiering on with the Bellator coverage, but i could have done without Goldstein typing up a succinct but LOL-worthy recap of Hector Lombard’s performance.  Way to go Beej, now stop making me look bad.  I’ll still be sharing my own perspective on the goings-on at BFC, even though i deuced out for the last two cards of the season.  Now i know that there are literally tens of you saying, “Oh noes, the Bellator season is over! Now where will we get a regular serving of MMA competition on the cheap?”  Relax:  Bellator will return for a full season in September, plus they have a few shows planned for the summer to tide us over until then. 

Oh and by the way, Potato Nation, i really need you to pick up your game in the caption contests and commenting strings. Assuming that you are out of practice, expect me to frequently post WTF-worthy pics and encourage you to caption them, because the less work i have to do, the better. Like having kids and orgies, if i can get you to entertain one another and still take the credit, i win. Do your worst, Nation.  No, there will be no prizes, save the amusement and admiration of your fellow readers. Similarly, i’ll be looking to resurrect the old “Ask the Potato” feature (so submit some damn questions), as well as a new regular feature involving fictional conversations between MMA personalities, since you have received our previous attempts at fictional entertainment so well.

So that’s it, Nation. Just wanted to drop a line letting you know that i’m still alive, still linking to other peoples’ hard work to entertain you, and yes, Drano, you still my boy. But damn, ya’ll — can we take it easy on MRuss? It’s only a matter of time until some big media outlet needs a real MMA reporter, and trust me, you don’t want me trying to pick up that slack, too. I really suck at interviews. Or at least, that’s what you guys have said.

[RX]