Last night’s UFC on FX 4 event was in many ways a microcosm of life. There were ups, there were downs, we laughed, we cried, we got kind of pissed off a couple of times at the end, but overall we left it with no regrets…..mostly because it was free….
CLAY GUIDA VS GRAY MAYNARD
The main event found, Gray “The Bully” Maynard with a questionable decision victory over the man simply known as “The Carpenter,” No, I’m just kidding we know his name it’s Clay Guida…
Right, so by questionable I really mean bullsh*t. Essentially we had a very technical if unorthodox lesson in stick and move style boxing from the Greg Jackson pupil while The Bully went with a different game plan consisting mostly of heavily plodding forward while wildly missing with big 1-2’s. Guida defended his opponent’s takedown attempts in brilliant fashion and in this cocky sh*t’s opinion would have had a nearly perfect performance if he hadn’t straight up run away from his opponent on at least two different occasions.
Don’t get me wrong, I WOULD RUN AWAY FROM GRAY MAYNARD, but then again I’m not a professional badass like the Carpenter. We’ve all seen Guida’s previous performances, and no one with an ounce of sense can doubt his mettle, but this latest foray into the octagon reeks of the same “running man” stench that drove the Condit-Diaz affair.
Aside from being a little boring at times, Guida’s erratic style garnered him a series of impressive combinations that culminated with a beautiful head kick to Maynard’s face that stood his @ss straight up!!
Even though I believe Guida’s clear control of the standup and superb takedown defense outweighed his lapses in technical defense (he ran like a p#ssy twice) and should have been enough to take the decision, the most exciting moment of the fight came towards the later rounds. You should really go youtube it, but essentially a very frustrated Maynard threw caution to the wind, dropped his hands and walked forward while screaming at Guida to fight, in the process eating several shots from the Carpenter all in an attempt to get his foe to engage….like a boss. This f*cking guy is crazier than your ex-girlfriend.
When all was said and done, the judges felt that Gray’s frustration at not being able to hit his opponent was enough to deserve a unanimous decision. I say make them fight again!!!
SAM STOUT VS SPENCER FISHER
In this bout we see the conclusion of a trilogy of brutal engagements between Sam “Hands of Stone” Stout, and the ever-dangerous, Spencer “The King” Fisher. This fight went much the same way as their last two fights, with both men beating the sh*t out of each other bell to bell.
For those who aren’t familiar, Stout had his UFC debut against, “The King” Fisher back in 2006, showing great heart and determination in taking a judges’ split decision. Fast forward almost a year and the rematch showed us very good standup from Fisher, who mainly used vicious boxing to carry him to a unanimous judges’ decision.
At one apiece, each man undoubtedly came ready to go all-out in the cage, and as foreshadowed by their previous clashes, the men delivered another thrilling three round war. Fisher showed the superior short boxing from the inside, employing it very successfully to bust “Hands of Stone” the f*ck up! It looked to be a repeat performance for “The King,” until Stout showcased his evolution as a mixed martial artist—from young rising prospect to veteran octagon warrior. Midway through the fight, Stout surprisingly started scoring with takedowns, allowing him to open up-with some ground-and-pound in the form of repeated short elbows to the head and arms of Fisher.
The final frame saw both men busted up and swinging until the very last seconds of the duel. While one could argue that Stout took more damage at the hands of Fisher, the takedowns as well as the limited, yet effective ground-and-pound swayed the judges in favor of Stout winning him both the battle and the war in this their third and final confrontation. To be honest I would watch these guys fight over and over again, like Nam Phan and Leonard Garcia, or Shogun and Hendo…What do you b*tches think?
BRIAN EBERSOLE VS TJ WALDBURGER
The eternal Brian Ebersole faced off against the up-and-coming TJ Waldburger in a three round battle which concluded with an Ebersole decision victory. If you were to look at their records you might not be very surprised by the outcome of the fight. On paper, Ebersole is the clear favorite. Let’s break it down a little.
Take Ebersole’s record going into this fight: 49-14-1-1. That’s forty-nine wins, and only fourteen losses in over sixty professional fights. It’s safe to say that Ebersole fits the mold for a very particular breed of pro badass, the mixed martial artist that has been around forever, fought everybody, seen EVERYTHING, and is damn near impossible to finish at this point. I call this rare breed, “The Eternals”
If you were to look at Waldburger’s resume, you might think the same thing my 16 year old brother thought when he mentioned the possibility that the UFC was feeding him to Ebersole as they sometimes do when a high profile fighter loses a bout and needs a tune-up fight. With a 15-7 pro record and a 3-1 UFC record, what my brother said made sense. The only thing odd thing was that Brian Ebersole has been on a tear going through some very high level ass-kickers in the process. Wins over fellow eternals, Chris Lytle (31-18-5), and Dennis Hallman (51-14-2-1) stood out in particular. With a 3-0 UFC record and riding a ten fight win streak Ebersole did not fit the profile for a guy needing a tune up fight.
Well one thing became readily apparent as soon as the contest began, TJ Waldburger is one bad hombre. The guy who turned pro at seventeen years old dropped the eternal with a heavy counter punch early on which is ironic considering that Ebersole’s signature arrow shaved into his chest hair is there as a testament to the fact that no one has knocked him out in over sixty fights. It also serves as a tongue-in-cheek reminder to his opponents as to where to direct their violence.
Waldburger then pounced on the stunned Ebersole putting him in several deep submission attempts that the eternal countered beautifully showing exactly how hard it can be to choke out that kind of high level grappler. Eventually Ebersole managed to reverse his situation into a top position where he rained down heavy ground and pound to a very active and still dangerous but slowly fading Waldburger. Throw in some weird ass pseudo-capoeira kick on Ebersole’s behalf and you pretty much had the same thing all the way to the end of the fight, where an Ebersole fully recovered from his near disastrous knockdown in round one raised his arms in victory (his 50th professional MMA victory) as a f*cked up TJ Waldburger took his second loss in the octagon.
CUB SWANSON VS ROSS PEARSON
Ladies and gentlemen, this one was a barnburner. The Jackson’s Mixed Martial Arts representative, Cub Swanson, showed off a very diverse and dynamic striking style as he claimed his second consecutive knockout, this time with less than a minute left in the second round and simultaneously earning Knockout of the Night.
Toward the end of the first round, his opponent Ross Pearson, had some success throwing combinations inside, exploiting the fact that midway through Swanson for some reason reverted to throwing single power strikes.
At one point Swanson through an absolutely beautiful capoeira kick—you should DEFINITELY YOUTUBE THIS ONE— and he landed it straight to dude’s f*ckin NECK. What’s even crazier than that you ask? Pearson just ate it and followed up with some tasty ground-and-pound.
Ultimately, a roughed up Cub Swanson would get to his feet and resume the ass kicking. Pearson had no answer for the speed, accuracy and unpredictability of Swanson’s flying through the air at you with strikes type standup assault.
The end came quickly when Pearson masterfully caught one of Swanson’s kicks, proceeded to drive through, pushing his opponent back towards the opposite cage. His attempts to finish the takedown earned him two hard right hands from Swanson forcing the tough Brit to drop the leg and a follow up hook floored him. A merciful referee stoppage saved him as Swanson began to swarm with punches.
With two consecutive knockout victories, both of which came in thrilling fashion, Cub Swanson is quickly becoming a fan favorite. For the audience’s sake, we can only hope Jay Silva keeps giving him strikers after the healthy diet of grapplers he was fed for so long. With any luck he’ll keep getting matches where he can show off his superb striking game for our viewing pleasure. Buahaha haha!!!!
WRAP-UP
In conclusion, DON’T FORGET TO WATCH UFC 147 TONIGHT!! Live fights from Brazil, will pit headliners, Wanderlei “The Axe Murderer “Silva, and former UFC Middleweight Champion Rich “Ace” Franklin against one another in their second encounter. It should be pretty violent so round up your crew, hit up the nearest bar, get drunk and watch these guys beat the hell out of each other! If you’re lucky you might even get laid after….but knowing you, probably not. I’ll try to have another recap on tonight’s fights for you tomorrow! Later mother*ckas!!
By: John Rivera