(Hello Quinton, Areva Mookjai here with the Thailand Lady-Boy Observer, I was just wondering if…wow, you go right after it, don’t you?)
We almost feel silly reporting on this, being that there is no way in hell this quarrel will actually be settled in the near future, but just in case you haven’t heard, Quinton Jackson and Chael Sonnen are apparently not a fan of one another, you guys. If you recall, during our thrilling interview with Page a couple of months ago, Jackson stated that he thought Sonnen was “a fool” and was tired of people asking him questions about the former middleweight title challenger on Twitter.
This is where we’d normally say something like, “Time has a way of healing all wounds,” but then of course, we wouldn’t be talking about Rampage Jackson, a man who seemingly has a gripe with everyone and everything from American fans to the UFC to driving down the correct side of a freeway. During a brief interview with MMAElite.net, Jackson aired out his dirty laundry in regards to Sonnen, claiming that he should “leave the UFC because that’s what he said he was going to do if he lost.” Also, “F*ck Chael.” While the former remark could be passed off as a simple criticism, the latter not so much:
Being the charismatic and media-savvy guy that he is, Chael took to his old post on FUEL TV’s UFC Tonight to issue a response. Wasting little time, Sonnen went with the time tested, “Why don’t you stick to *list prior faults of subject at hand*” defense. It was rather effective if you ask us.
Chael’s response begins at the 40 second mark, where, after patting himself on the back a little, Sonnen actually tries to take the high road, stating:
To keep it professional, my answer would simply be, listen, Rampage has one fight left and it’s not against me.
And if you had never heard of Chael Sonnen before, you would likely think that this would be the end of it. But you know better than that, Potato Nation. Sonnen is NEVER professional when it comes to the trash-talking game, and the day that he sits idly by and lets someone lob insults at him without returning fire will be the day that CagePotato receives UFC press credentials. The man is a master of emotional manipulation, and would undoubtedly be the undisputed champion of Yo Momma if that show were still around.
Matter of fact, if you pause the video at the 51 second mark, you can almost see the inner workings of Sonnen’s mind preparing a comeback. Gears are turning, data is being collected, schematics are be constructed — it’s like poetry, really. And with a simple “Now,” Sonnen makes The Switch, not unlike Sylvester Stallone in Over the Top, and unleashes the following:
Now, had you asked me in the streets, in my kingdom, amongst my people, while I’m not wearing the suit and I don’t have the earpiece, and I’m in my sponsor’s t-shirt, my answer might have been different. I’d have probably said ‘Hey Rampage, why don’t you stick to violating female reporters, making box office disasters, and driving the wrong way down the freeway while you’re jacked up on Mountain Dew. Because you ‘Page are not on my level.’ But you didn’t ask me outside, you asked me inside so let’s keep it professional. I don’t wanna get that message out there.
Notice how Sonnen turns to camera 1 to deliver his direct message to Page, as if an alternate persona is stepping in to do his dirty work. Brilliant. But perhaps less than brilliant would be claiming that a former UFC champion, a real former champion, is not “on your level.” Then again, us trying to tell Sonnen how to spit game would be like Sonnen trying to tell us how to defend a triangle choke, so we’ll just thank him for more or less giving us a shout out with the whole “violating female reporters” nod and leave it at that.
Like we said, the fact that these two will never come to blows takes a significant amount of steam out of this potential rivalry, if not all of it. But we’d be nowhere if it wasn’t for needless speculation, which is why we ask unto you:
Given a fight between Sonnen and Page were to take place nowadays, and at a catchweight of 195 lbs, who takes it and how?