God damn it, you guys. God. Damn. It.
Maybe it’s just me, but everytime it seems like this thing we call MMA is finally on the right track towards honest-to-God legitimacy, Jose Canseco shows up, or the UFC signs a yoga instructor(‘s death warrant), or some shit like this happens and we’re back to square one.
Begin the SMH’ing, because some Brazilian website is reporting that Shooto, one of Brazil’s longest and (formerly) most prestigious MMA organizations, is planning a man vs. woman fight at this weekend’s Shooto Brazil 45. Specifically, Nova Uniao product Emerson Falcao vs. Team Nogueira’s Juliana Velasquez. Who will be making her professional debut.
I…I just can’t anymore, you guys. Wiping my hands of this whole thing.
And who came up with this fucking ree-dick-you-lus idea, you ask? Oh, just Andre Pederneiras, the legendary Uniao founder/trainer who has seemed like a relatively intelligent individual up until this point. Maybe he knows something we don’t. In any case, here’s the scoop, as Velasquez told MMAFighting:
Andre Pederneiras came up with the idea. He asked Team Nogueira for a female fighter and my team believes I’m ready, so I accepted the challenge. My expectations are the best. I’m well trained to get there and win.
I’m used to training with man every day. I’m a professional judoka and I know the adrenaline of the competition, I know how to handle this.
Look, it’s not like a woman can’t beat a man in an MMA fight. Ediane Gomes did it. Cyborg Santos probably does it on weekends for kicks. But there’s just something about this whole idea that seems so…
[UPDATE]
(via MMAFighting) Thank the heavens, this thing might not actually be happening:
Osiris Maia, member of the Brazilian Mixed Martial Arts Confederation, the entity responsible for regulating the Shooto Brazil events, is not sure if they will allow the male vs. female fight to happen.
“There’s nothing in the rules that specific prohibits a man to fight a woman, but when you interpret the rules you know that both athletes must be in the same level, so there’s no way a man should be allowed to fight a woman,” Maia told MMAFighting.com.
“We haven’t received the official card yet from the promotion, we’ll get that (on Thursday) at the weigh-ins,” he continued. “I wasn’t informed about that yet. They announced it to the media only, but if you ask me if we’re allowing it to happen, I don’t think so. I think it’s a disparity. We’ll see what’s going on tomorrow at the weigh-ins.”
Well, it’s good to know that there’s at least one sane individual in all of Brazil who will at least wait until the weigh-ins to call this sham off. The little victories, Nation. The little victories.
We will have more on this story travesty as details are made available.