“I got three of Richie’s guys breathing through their foreheads ova he-ya, so allow me be brief…”
Behind the scenes information and rampant speculation in the lead-up to a fight is the MMA equivalent of chicks gossiping in a powder room. It’s, like, totally fun, but when you start to base your investment portfolio around it or develop an eating disorder you know you’ve crossed the line. At least, that’s usually the case. The scoop we’re about to share with you is as solid as they come, so take advantage of this opportunity to change your fight picks and spray a bottle of Cool Whip directly into your throat.
Earlier this week, Light-Heavyweight challenger Lyoto Machida revealed that he had not been in communication with Black House’s not-so-secret weapon, Steven Seagal, during his training camp. Considering that his devastating knock out victory over Randy Couture was directly attributable (cough) to the action film star, it seemed odd that he wouldn’t turn to him for guidance while training for the fight of his life.
Have no fear, Dragon fans. As it turns out, Jon Jones‘ weaknesses are so glaring that they can be pointed out and easily exploited after a brief, last-minute teleconference. Who knew? Oh yeah, Seagal did.
In an interview with the Toronto Sun, the Akido black belt said that while he may not make it out to the Air Canada Centre, he’ll be in touch with Machida via Skype. Quoth the “Lawman”:
“I think Lyoto is a better puncher, a better kicker and he really moves better than Jon. I see some things Jon does that I think can be exploited, and I’m going to go over those things with Lyoto. In my opinion Lyoto is probably the best striker in the business. I’m not saying he hits harder than Junior Dos Santos or someone like that, but his speed, his timing and his accuracy are very good.”
Of course Machida is only one half of the equation this evening. What does Seagal think of the young champ?
“He’s a great fighter, but do I think he’s a great puncher and kicker? Absolutely not. He’s just very big and very strong and he’s a very good wrestler.”
Wrestling: it really fucks your face up.
So there you have it. Run with that information, make your predictions below, complain that we’re talking about Seagal again…basically, just do what you do, people.