(“Can we hurry this up? I’m on my way to the scene of Aleks’ latest crime against humanity.”)
It has been many moons since we had our last caption contest, and boy oh boy did it show in last week’s results. I’d like to think this was you Taters working out the comedy ring rust, so to speak. Some of you opted for stoner jokes, because Nick Diaz, some of you opted to make fun of the gentleman on the right’s attire (WSOF vet Martin Sano, FWIW), and some of you didn’t really even attempt jokes at all, but merely observed that Diaz was in the same picture as the GOAT. Overall, I’d say this was a moderate success.
But onto the winning caption, which came via our Facebook page and completely destroyed the competition…
(“Can we hurry this up? I’m on my way to the scene of Aleks’ latest crime against humanity.”)
It has been many moons since we had our last caption contest, and boy oh boy did it show in last week’s results. I’d like to think this was you Taters working out the comedy ring rust, so to speak. Some of you opted for stoner jokes, because Nick Diaz, some of you opted to make fun of the gentleman on the right’s attire (WSOF vet Martin Sano, FWIW), and some of you didn’t really even attempt jokes at all, but merely observed that Diaz was in the same picture as the GOAT. Overall, I’d say this was a moderate success.
But onto the winning caption, which came via our Facebook page and completely destroyed the competition…
B Donovan Fousel: ”A stoner and a metrosexual walk into a bar. It was an armbar.”
With 66 likes, I think it’s safe to say that the people have spoken. Well done, Donovan, now if you’ll kindly send us your contact info via [email protected], I’ll get right on sending you a random DVD from my vault. I hope you like torture porn as much as I do…
(The Greatest and The Realest, seen here discussing Russian trade policies and how to properly roll a blunt. via Martin Sano Jr.)
Can I level with you for a second, Nation? I’ve spent the last two days combatting a sickness something awful — chest congestion, stomach bug, milk leg, hot tub foot, scrotal migraines…the whole nine. It’s just been an absolute bacchanal of contamination and infection going on inside my body, the root of which I highly speculate to be the cobra whiskey I bought off a street urchin in (Boston) Chinatown earlier in the week.
But having awoken today with the internal storm mostly behind me, I feel like switching things up and passing along the positive vibes to you, the readers, with a good old fashioned caption contest. Lucky for me, this photo of Fedor Emelianenko and Nick Diaz made its way onto r/mma this morning, giving me/you the perfect opportunity to cash in on my newfound generosity.
You know the deal by now. Come up with your best captions for this photo — either in the comments section below, or on our Facebook page if said comments section isn’t working (which, let’s be honest, it probably isn’t). If you’re funny enough, you’ll win a random DVD from my extensive video library. Will it be an event DVD, like UFC 91 or 111? An unapologetically terrible movie starring an MMA fighter, like In the Blood or Scorpion King XVIII? Or maybe just highlights from my family trip to Myrtle Beach? BRING THE FUNNY AND FIND OUT!
(The Greatest and The Realest, seen here discussing Russian trade policies and how to properly roll a blunt. via Martin Sano Jr.)
Can I level with you for a second, Nation? I’ve spent the last two days combatting a sickness something awful — chest congestion, stomach bug, milk leg, hot tub foot, scrotal migraines…the whole nine. It’s just been an absolute bacchanal of contamination and infection going on inside my body, the root of which I highly speculate to be the cobra whiskey I bought off a street urchin in (Boston) Chinatown earlier in the week.
But having awoken today with the internal storm mostly behind me, I feel like switching things up and passing along the positive vibes to you, the readers, with a good old fashioned caption contest. Lucky for me, this photo of Fedor Emelianenko and Nick Diaz made its way onto r/mma this morning, giving me/you the perfect opportunity to cash in on my newfound generosity.
You know the deal by now. Come up with your best captions for this photo — either in the comments section below, or on our Facebook page if said comments section isn’t working (which, let’s be honest, it probably isn’t). If you’re funny enough, you’ll win a random DVD from my extensive video library. Will it be an event DVD, like UFC 91 or 111? An unapologetically terrible movie starring an MMA fighter, like In the Blood or Scorpion King XVIII? Or maybe just highlights from my family trip to Myrtle Beach? BRING THE FUNNY AND FIND OUT!
(That BJ Penn’s UFC Gym is churning out some killers, I tells ya!”)
Without giving myself too much credit, I think it’s safe to say that the #WeekofDanga was an unequivocal success that is destined to become an annually-celebrated tradition here at CP. Likewise, the #WeekofDanga caption contest churned out a ton of great entries and more fat jokes than your average King of Queens episode. I’m sure Forrest would be proud if he weren’t so steaming mad right now.
But alas, there can be only one winner, as I have but one copy of In the Blood to give. And that winner is B. Donovan Fousel for an updated take on a classic idiom:
One sometimes misses the Forrest for all the trees… And by trees I mean bacon.
I’m not 100% sure if the metaphor even works in this instance, but that’s the kind of pun that forces me to ask the tough questions, you know? For ambition alone I say bravo, Mr. Fousel. Shoot us your mailing address and I’ll get your copy of In the Blood in the mail ASAP. Thanks to everyone who entered!
(That BJ Penn’s UFC Gym is churning out some killers, I tells ya!”)
Without giving myself too much credit, I think it’s safe to say that the #WeekofDanga was an unequivocal success that is destined to become an annually-celebrated tradition here at CP. Likewise, the #WeekofDanga caption contest churned out a ton of great entries and more fat jokes than your average King of Queens episode. I’m sure Forrest would be proud if he weren’t so steaming mad right now.
But alas, there can be only one winner, as I have but one copy of In the Blood to give. And that winner is B. Donovan Fousel for an updated take on a classic idiom:
One sometimes misses the Forrest for all the trees… And by trees I mean bacon.
I’m not 100% sure if the metaphor even works in this instance, but that’s the kind of pun that forces me to ask the tough questions, you know? For ambition alone I say bravo, Mr. Fousel. Shoot us your mailing address and I’ll get your copy of In the Blood in the mail ASAP. Thanks to everyone who entered!
Many of you newer readers might not know that, long before I was ever a dumb shit douchebag writer hack here, I was just a dumb shit douchebag commenter. You know, in the pre-Facebook times. The long-long ago, as it’s called. In any case, one of my favorite features of the ‘Tato back in the day was their/our caption contests, which have waned off a bit in recent years. So, being that this is the soon-to-be celebrated annually #WeekofDanga, I figured that I might as well revive an old relic as a way to give back to you, our fiercely-loyal-except-when-you-aren’t readers.
Unfortunately, I don’t have much to offer in the way of MMA memorabilia. I do, however, have an extra copy of In the Blood (read our review here) on DVD collecting dust in my room. It’s still in the plastic and everything. So if it’s a physical copy of the movie in which Gina Carano has her underwear ripped off while handcuffed that you’re seeking, join me after the jump to find out how you can win one fo’ free.
Many of you newer readers might not know that, long before I was ever a dumb shit douchebag writer hack here, I was just a dumb shit douchebag commenter. You know, in the pre-Facebook times. The long-long ago, as it’s called. In any case, one of my favorite features of the ‘Tato back in the day was their/our caption contests, which have waned off a bit in recent years. So, being that this is the soon-to-be celebrated annually #WeekofDanga, I figured that I might as well revive an old relic as a way to give back to you, our fiercely-loyal-except-when-you-aren’t readers.
Unfortunately, I don’t have much to offer in the way of MMA memorabilia. I do, however, have an extra copy of In the Blood (read our review here) on DVD collecting dust in my room. It’s still in the plastic and everything. So if it’s a physical copy of the movie in which Gina Carano has her underwear ripped off while handcuffed that you’re seeking, join me after the jump to find out how you can win one fo’ free.
Yep, that’s TUF 1 winner and former UFC light heavyweight champion Forrest Griffin looking…fit, while hanging out backstage at a UFC charity event yesterday. The photo was snapped by none other than fellow TUFer/former light heavyweight champ Rashad Evans, along with the caption:
I’m so excited for the return of Forrest Griffin! He looked ripped at the pre,pre, pre weigh-ins today! His abs were so defined!
Not bad, Suga, but I think you Taters can do better. Caption this photo however you see fit, using as many attempts at humor as you can, and I’ll select a winner for the In the Blood DVD on Monday. But again, this is the #WeekofDanga, so feel free to be as brutal and/or dark with your captions as humanly possible. And if our comment section goes down, tweet your captions at either CagePotato or myself with the hashtag #WeekofDanga.
Have I not mentioned that it’s the #WeekofDanga yet? Because it’s kind of a big deal. Good luck, you guys!
El Drizzle: Bruce Buffer: the original “Uncle Creepy.”
Jenn Baird: At least this one acknowledges that I even exist.
Brad White: So that’s the guy who bought my T-shirt!
Rudy Rosado: IT’S TIME!!!!!! . . . . . for a threesome.
Scott Butler: Joke’s on Arianny. I am wearing Brittney Palmer underwear.
And the winner is…
B Donovan Fousel: $20 bucks to wear Arianny as a shirt? How much to wear her like a hat?
Yeaaaaaah buddy! BDF, please check the “Other” folder in your Facebook messages, because we just sent you a note. As for the rest of you, stay tuned for one more chance to win a Combat Line t-shirt — like the “Boxing Club 2013″ design shown below — and check out more killer gear at FearTheFighter.com!
Kyle Trombley: Pettis is preparing for his next opponent, Ali G.
Justin Smith: “Tell Mustard he’s next.”
Ryan O’Leary: Pettis receives ban after pissing hot for pink champagne.
Stephen Faragher: Hepatitis A B and C in no particular order.
Mike Boyd: Minimalist Santa Claus, with fellow fun-boys the tin-man and some muthafucka who manged to pop a collar on a collarless shirt.
Patrick McCready: ”Hey, are either of you worried we might get a little TOO MUCH pussy tonight?”
And the winner is…
Barrett Jarvis: Know what would take this outfit to the next level? A red shirt.
Well done, Barrett. (Check the “Other” folder in your Facebook messages, because we just sent you a note.) As for the rest of you, stay tuned next week for another chance to win a Combat Line t-shirt — like the FTF MMA design shown below — and check out more killer gear at FearTheFighter.com!
