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Lavar Johnson Fired Following UFC 157 Drug Test; ‘Big’ Admits to Undergoing Testosterone Replacement Therapy

(“HYPOGONADISM BITCH, ALL DAY!” / Photo via Esther Lin @ MMAFighting)

Though his job appeared to be safe following his UFC 157 decision loss to Brendan Schaub, pissing dirty for steroids turned out to be the kiss of death for heavyweight Lavar “Big” Johnson. In light of his failed drug test, Johnson has been cut by the UFC. In addition, the California State Athletic Commission has hit him with a nine-month suspension, as well as a fine of “around $1,250” that reflects the cost of the two tests the CSAC used for his drug screening.

MMAJunkie adds some more surprising details about what led to Johnson’s PED bust:

An elevated testestosterone-to-epitestosterone (T/E) ratio of 6.6-to-1 triggered a carbon isotope ratio (CIR) test that confirmed Johnson had testosterone in his system that was “was consistent with the administration of a steroid.” Johnson, though, admitted he was undergoing testosterone replacement therapy in a recent conversation with the California State Athletic Commission, which oversaw the Feb. 23 pay-per-view event at Honda Center in Anaheim, Calif., and suspended him based on the results of his test. Johnson failed to disclose TRT on a pre-fight medical questionnaire. A rep for AKA said the fighter may seek an exemption for the treatment.

Here’s how you know TRT is nothing more than a bullshit cheating-method — when a dude who looks like this claims to need it, and then avoids mentioning it during his pre-fight medicals. Ah well. You can’t say the UFC didn’t warn you. In other UFC drug-bust aftermath news…

(“HYPOGONADISM BITCH, ALL DAY!” / Photo via Esther Lin @ MMAFighting)

Though his job appeared to be safe following his UFC 157 decision loss to Brendan Schaub, pissing dirty for steroids turned out to be the kiss of death for heavyweight Lavar “Big” Johnson. In light of his failed drug test, Johnson has been cut by the UFC. In addition, the California State Athletic Commission has hit him with a nine-month suspension, as well as a fine of “around $1,250″ that reflects the cost of the two tests the CSAC used for his drug screening.

MMAJunkie adds some more surprising details about what led to Johnson’s PED bust:

UFC middleweight Riki Fukuda, whose positive test for a trio of banned stimulants following UFC on FUEL TV 8 earlier this month led to his own release from the promotion, is blaming the result on over-the-counter cold medication, which he says he took a few weeks before the event, but forgot to disclose to UFC officials beforehand. According to MMAFighting, “Fukuda’s positive test result will be reported to the Association of Boxing Commissions, which will then make a decision regarding how long before he would be allowed to fight for another organization.”

As for Alex “One Toke Over the Line” Caceres, the featherweight released the following statement on Wednesday regarding his bust for marijuana metabolites at the same event: “I accept full responsibility for my actions and the consequences from those actions. I apologize to all that I have disappointed, including the UFC, my family, coaches, training partners and fans. I accept the sanctions from the UFC, and I look forward to completing the necessary steps to getting back in the octagon following the suspension and assuring that this never happens again.”

As we reported previously, Caceres will be suspended six months, and must attend drug rehabilitation classes and pass a drug test before he’s allowed to return to competition. I know, I know — drug rehab for weed. Don’t get us started.

‘UFC on FUEL 8? Drug Tests Nail Alex Caceres (Marijuana) and Riki Fukuda (Stimulants)

(Alex asks that you respect his privacy at this time, and would like to state for the record that Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Tacos were originally his idea. / Photo via MMAWeekly)

And the hits just keep coming, folks. In the immediate wake of Lavar Johnson’s apparent steroid bust after UFC 157, two more fighters have been flagged for failed drug tests following their performances at UFC on FUEL 8: Silva vs. Stann. With no regulating body in place, UFC officials oversaw the testing of fighters at the March 3rd event in Saitama, Japan.

First up on the naughty list is Alex “Bruce Leroy” Caceres, who tested positive for marijuana metabolites after his split-decision win over Kyung Ho Kang during the UFC on FUEL 8 prelims. Caceres will be suspended six months, and must attend drug rehabilitation classes and pass a drug test before he’s allowed to return. Furthermore, his victory over Kang — which would have been his third-straight in the UFC — has been changed to a no-contest. Caceres joins Matt Riddle, Thiago Silva, Dave Herman, Nick Diaz, and Nick Diaz’s friends in the growing list of publicly-outed potheads.

Also caught in the latest drug-sweep was Japanese middleweight Riki Fukuda, who lost a decision to Brad Tavares on the night in question. According to MMAJunkie, Fukuda tested positive for the banned stimulants phenylpropanolamine (never heard of it), norpseudoephedrine (never heard of it), and ephedrine (love that stuff). Sadly, Fukuda isn’t getting off with a suspension — he’s already been released by the UFC. The loss to Tavares dropped Fukuda’s Octagon record to 2-3, with all fights going the distance.

Damn…steroids, weed, and uppers in the same day — or as we like to call it, “The Tijuana Triathlon.” Get your shit together, UFC fighters.

(Alex asks that you respect his privacy at this time, and would like to state for the record that Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Tacos were originally his idea. / Photo via MMAWeekly)

Damn…steroids, weed, and uppers in the same day — or as we like to call it, “The Tijuana Triathlon.” Get your shit together, UFC fighters.

Lavar Johnson’s Post-UFC 157 Drug Test Comes Back Positive for Elevated Testosterone

(Image via Esther Lin/MMAFighting.com)

UFC heavyweight Lavar Johnson — who directly inspired our “Will You Be Fired…” flowchart by not getting fired following his UFC 157 loss to Brendan Schaub — caught a bit of bad news yesterday. The California State Athletic Commission revealed (via MMAJunkie) that Johnson’s post-fight drug test at the February 23rd event was flagged for elevated levels of testosterone. A follow-up carbon isotope ratio test “confirmed the testosterone was consistent with the administration of a steroid.”

No word yet on what that steroid was specifically or how high his T-levels were, but damn Lavar, you in troubllllllle. A suspension and fine are likely imminent, and the failed test could eliminate the good-will that Johnson has built up with his employers by always coming to bang.

It’s also noteworthy that Johnson’s drug test involved a carbon isotope ratio test, which “examines the atomic make-up of testosterone in the urine to determine if it is natural or synthetic.” The UFC has drawn some criticism in the past for not using this effective method of catching cheaters. Is the promotion about to get tougher in its anti-doping efforts? And could this be related to Dana White’s recent vow to “test the [expletive]” out of TRT abusers? We’ll update you when we know more…

(Image via Esther Lin/MMAFighting.com)

And the Fighter Who Failed His Drug Test at ‘UFC on FX 7? Is…[UPDATED]

(Don’t worry, it’s the guy on the bottom. Photo courtesy of Getty Images.)

Relax, Potato Nation, we can all rest assured knowing that Vitor Belfort did in fact beat the colon cannonballs out of Michael Bisping at UFC on FX 7 without needing a banned substance to do so (Author’s note: Not that we would judge him if he did. Because when you judge someone, it sounds like you are a God. And we live in a freedom country, where you are either a Republican or a Democrat. Who is right?). And while that’s all well and good, one of the tests from the event did come back positive, as Dana White had mentioned earlier this week.

According to Brazilian news outlet Tatame, the fighter who pissed dirty at UFC on FX 7 was…Thiago Tavares:

After many rumors, the results of doping tests UFC Sao Paulo left [Note: Fucking Google translate, I tell you]. According to TATAME, the name of the athlete caught is Thiago Tavares. Our sources, however, need not know the substance used for light weight. His suspension will be nine months.

(Don’t worry, it’s the guy on the bottom. Photo courtesy of Getty Images.)

According to Brazilian news outlet Tatame, the fighter who pissed dirty at UFC on FX 7 was…Thiago Tavares:

After many rumors, the results of doping tests UFC Sao Paulo left [Note: Fucking Google translate, I tell you]. According to TATAME, the name of the athlete caught is Thiago Tavares. Our sources, however, need not know the substance used for light weight. His suspension will be nine months.

Yep, the guy we last saw eating Khabib Nurmagomedov’s elbows like they were acarajes is the one who got popped for what we can only assume is some kind of steroid. It kind of makes sense when you realize that Tavares regularly drops 20 pounds in between fights to fulfill his double life as salsa artist Marc Anthony. Thankfully, his karmatic punishment was delivered in the swiftest fashion possible via 27 unanswered shots to the dome. Big Dan DOES NOT allow that kind of insolence in his octagon.

The five year UFC veteran has yet to comment on his positive test, but feel free to start speculating what his excuse will be in the comments section. Personally, I’m going to go with the old “tainted supplements” defense, which seems to be the popular rebuttal amongst Brazilians. It’s all the acai berries if you ask me. Those damn ~~stanozolol~~ drostanalone-filled acai berries.

[UPDATE]

According to MMAJunkie, the mystery substance Tavares tested positive for was drostanalone, the weight-cutting steroid of choice for such MMA fighters as King Mo Lawal and Hermes Franca. Chalk up another entry in the CagePotato Steroid Bust Timeline.

–J. Jones

Vitor Belfort Didn’t Fail His Drug Test at UFC on FX 7…But Somebody Else Might Have

(Belfort is not a “TRT abuser,” okay? He has always treated TRT with the utmost respect and tenderness. / Photo via RyanLoco.com)

On Friday morning, rumors began to spread that Vitor Belfort had failed a drug test for his UFC on FX 7 headlining fight against Michael Bisping last month. Between Belfort’s stammering recent response about TRT and his previous PED-bust in 2006, it was one of those rumors that immediately gained traction because it seemed perfectly believable. But was there any actual truth to it? Well, we have some good news and some bad news. Here’s what UFC president Dana White had to say when asked about the Belfort rumor following the UFC 156 press-conference on Saturday night (transcribed by MMAWeekly and BloodyElbow):

“There was an irregular test. Something was wrong. Whenever something wrong happens, or weird, (the samples) get retested and, usually, it’s not a good thing. It (expletive) was not Vitor Belfort. Yet, right now I bet if you talked to 100 people, 100 people will tell you that Vitor Belfort failed his drug test in Brazil. That’s (expletive)…I do know the results. They’ll be out Monday… [Ed. note: *checks calendar* Sweet!]

(Belfort is not a “TRT abuser,” okay? He has always treated TRT with the utmost respect and tenderness. / Photo via RyanLoco.com)

“That’s crazy, that some rumor from a (expletive) clown with a fake name on Twitter can do that. It’s crazy. Some (expletive) goof on Twitter puts out a tweet, and everybody starts (expletive) throwing these accusations around. I’ve got Michael Bisping (expletive) blow me up at 1 in the morning from England going, ‘Did that (expletive) fail the drug test?’ It’s (expletive) crazy, man.”

Alright, so it looks like the Phenom is out of the woods. But could this “irregular test” mean that somebody else on the card is going to get nailed today? If so, it would already be the third failed drug test this year. Feel free to speculate about the latest drug-cheat’s identity in the comments section, and we’ll update this post as soon as we hear more.

Conspiracy Theory Alert: Rafael Cavalcante Believes CSAC “Wanted to Harm Him”

(“No way! You were the completely innocent victim of a vast conspiracy aimed at soiling your reputation TOO?! Somebody call Lance, we’ve got some work to do.”)

You know, just once I would like to hear an athlete take full responsibility for their actions without needing an hour-long Oprah special to do so. I realize that as fans, we often refuse to acknowledge that the people we falsely idolize are capable of wrongdoing, but if the athletes that continue to get busted for banned substances/steroids/stevia were truly concerned about their fanbase, they probably wouldn’t be trying to cheat the system in the first place.

So you’ll excuse my rush to judgement, but suffice it to say, I ain’t buying the conspiracy theory that former Strikeforce light heavyweight champion Rafael “Feijao” Cavalcante laid out in a recent interview with Globo Esporte. As you might recall, Cavalcante tested positive for Stanozolol in the aftermath of his win over Mike Kyle last May, and was subsequently denied an appeal by the California State Athletic Commission in the months that followed. Although if you were to ask Rafael, he would tell you that the blood — or rather, the urine — is on the CSAC’s hands:

The organizers wanted to harm me. I had conducted a test in Brazil a week before the fight. I would not be so stupid to take any banned substance, the type of anabolic they claimed I took in fact makes a person gain weight. I’m already a heavyweight, would not take that.

The urine sample was manipulated. When the form was submitted, it was dated on May 18, 2012, but in reality the sample was collected a day later on may 19. When we checked the form more carefully, we saw that there was another mistake. The collection was made at the HP Pavilion, where the event was held, but in the form it says collection was made at the hotel where we were staying.

(“No way! You were the completely innocent victim of a vast conspiracy aimed at soiling your reputation TOO?! Somebody call Lance, we’ve got some work to do.”)

The organizers wanted to harm me. I had conducted a test in Brazil a week before the fight. I would not be so stupid to take any banned substance, the type of anabolic they claimed I took in fact makes a person gain weight. I’m already a heavyweight, would not take that.

The urine sample was manipulated. When the form was submitted, it was dated on May 18, 2012, but in reality the sample was collected a day later on may 19. When we checked the form more carefully, we saw that there was another mistake. The collection was made at the HP Pavilion, where the event was held, but in the form it says collection was made at the hotel where we were staying.

Now, it’s a well known fact that CSAC has bungled a drug test or two in their day — most notoriously in the case of Sean Sherk — to the point that they vowed to completely revamp their drug-testing system in the past. But like we said, that was years ago, and unless CSAC is still going around using dirty vials to take their samples, Cavalcante is probably just bullshitting us here.

In either case, Cavalcante continued to lob accusations at the members of the athletic committee like it was going out of style:

You filed a lawsuit against the CSAC?
Went in and managed to dissolve the committee. The chief inspector of the commission, Che Guevara, lied in front of the judge. He said that it was he who collected my urine, and was the inspector of the commission Roy Fahri. Until the documents were signed with different people.

Why do you think they did this?
Tough talk, do not want to accuse anyone (Author’s note: Yeah, except you just did.), but they did not accept the defeat of Mike, big star of the event.

Let’s back the truck up here for a second: The chief inspector’s name was Che Guevara? CHE FREAKING GUEVARA?! Either Cavalcante actually was the victim of some dirty shit last May or he is some kind of Verbal Kint/Keyser Soze evil genius who crafted a completely fictional story based on book titles and stray papers that littered the interviewer’s office in order to cover his tracks. Or Google translate sucks donkey rectum. Based on my past experience uncovering conspiracy theories, I’m going to go with option #2. There’s no way that you’re going to convince me that Mike Kyle was the big star of any MMA event.

Anyone buying Cavalcante’s story?

–J. Jones