(Man, the Jack Links people are gonna be pissed when they realize their mascot is jumping ship for Subway.)
Alright, so we all know that Daniel Cormieris fat. And, of course, we all also know that fat people are what Roy Nelson eats for his three squares each day. Preferably after they’ve been dipped in a vat of sausage gravy and deep fried.
The guy’s big.
As such, fans and fighters alike have often wondered aloud if the two would be better suited at a lighter weight class – say, light heavyweight. However, both guys continue to kick ass at heavyweight, which kinda makes it hard to say that they should feel a sense of urgency to drop a weight class (except, you know, so as not to die in ten years from a heart attack, Roy).
Nelson is coming off a knockout of professional Greek Statue Model, Cheick Kongo, and Cormier just dominated his second former UFC heavyweight champion. There has been talk of the two facing each other next. But there’s also been talk, mainly from Dana White, that Cormier could get an automatic shot at champion Jon Jones should he choose to drop down to 205lbs.
At first, it seemed liked both Nelson and Cormier were down to face one another, but then “Big Country’s” manager made him look like a chicken — a succulent, golden-fried chicken — by nixing the proposed matchup. Fortunately, Nelson spoke with Bloody Elbow recently and cleared things up once and for all. We guess.
As far Daniel [Cormier], I think the reason Mike, my manager, said anything about Daniel is because he’s supposed be getting an immediate title shot at 205. If he’s going down to 205, it doesn’t really make any sense to fight him, unless we’re going to fight for a 205 contendership. Then hey, we can do that, too.
(Man, the Jack Links people are gonna be pissed when they realize their mascot is jumping ship for Subway.)
Alright, so we all know that Daniel Cormieris fat. And, of course, we all also know that fat people are what Roy Nelson eats for his three squares each day. Preferably after they’ve been dipped in a vat of sausage gravy and deep fried.
The guy’s big.
As such, fans and fighters alike have often wondered aloud if the two would be better suited at a lighter weight class – say, light heavyweight. However, both guys continue to kick ass at heavyweight, which kinda makes it hard to say that they should feel a sense of urgency to drop a weight class (except, you know, so as not to die in ten years from a heart attack, Roy).
Nelson is coming off a knockout of professional Greek Statue Model, Cheick Kongo, and Cormier just dominated his second former UFC heavyweight champion. There has been talk of the two facing each other next. But there’s also been talk, mainly from Dana White, that Cormier could get an automatic shot at champion Jon Jones should he choose to drop down to 205lbs.
At first, it seemed liked both Nelson and Cormier were down to face one another, but then “Big Country’s” manager made him look like a chicken – a succulent, golden-fried chicken — by nixing the proposed matchup. Fortunately, Nelson spoke with Bloody Elbow recently and cleared things up once and for all. We guess.
As far Daniel [Cormier], I think the reason Mike, my manager, said anything about Daniel is because he’s supposed be getting an immediate title shot at 205. If he’s going down to 205, it doesn’t really make any sense to fight him, unless we’re going to fight for a 205 contendership. Then hey, we can do that, too.
What do you think, taters? Are we getting further into the danger zone here trying to decide who gets to be the number one contender in the light heavyweight division? First, Dan Henderson gets the shot after an amazing effort against Mauricio “Shogun” Rua that he actually should not have won. Then, Machida somehow gets back in the picture despite getting choked out by the champion in less than two rounds and turning down the rematch on short notice. Then it’s Chael Sonnen for some reason, then it’s that Swedish guy…uh…I think Guto Inocente was in the mix at one point…
And now, we have two chubby heavyweights possibly vying for the right to fight for the title of a weight class no one knows for certain they are interested (or even able to compete) in. Bull Mountain, don’t go changin’ on me!
Say what you want about how Griffin has looked in the octagon as of late (Seriously, do it. Here are a few adjective suggestions: sluggish, apathetic, hairy, manic-depressive), but even we couldn’t have seen this coming. When it was announced a few days ago that Sonnen would making his return to 205 lbs at UFC 155 against FoGriff after being tarred and feathered coming up short in his rematch with Anderson Silva, we expected that he would open as a small favorite with the former Light Heavyweight champ, if not even. Despite Griffin’s aforementioned lack of firepower lately, especially considering he was riding the TRT train for his last bout, Forrest is pretty massive for a light heavyweight, and you know, already beat Sonnen once before. There is also the fact that Sonnen’s last fight in the UFC at light heavyweight ended in submission (you know which one), and that Griffin managed to catch him with that exact same submission in their first, etc…
In either case, we were dead wrong.
Currently, BestFightOdds has Sonnen listed at an even -300 over Griffin, which must be based entirely on their respective performances against Anderson Silva, with Sonnen lasting roughly six and a half rounds and Griffin lasting roughly three and a half minutes. But those were a long three and a half minutes, you guys, like watching the puppy you got for Christmas fall through the ice in your Grandma’s pond and drown in slow motion…on that very same Christmas.
Needless to say, if this blatant disrespect doesn’t light a fire under Griffin’s ass, nothing will. We feel like we’ve typed that a lot lately.
Is that line as bad as we’re making it out to be? Join us after the jump for a good old fashioned head-to-head breakdown to see if our outrage is justified.
(Just bide your time, Chael, he’s gonna walk right into that kneebar any second now.)
Say what you want about how Griffin has looked in the octagon as of late (Seriously, do it. Here are a few adjective suggestions: sluggish, apathetic, hairy, manic-depressive), but even we couldn’t have seen this coming. When it was announced a few days ago that Sonnen would making his return to 205 lbs at UFC 155 against FoGriff after being tarred and feathered coming up short in his rematch with Anderson Silva, we expected that he would open as a small favorite with the former Light Heavyweight champ, if not even. Despite Griffin’s aforementioned lack of firepower lately, especially considering he was riding the TRT train for his last bout, Forrest is pretty massive for a light heavyweight, and you know, already beat Sonnen once before. There is also the fact that Sonnen’s last fight in the UFC at light heavyweight ended in submission (you know which one), and that Griffin managed to catch him with that exact same submission in their first, etc…
In either case, we were dead wrong.
Currently, BestFightOdds has Sonnen listed at an even -300 over Griffin, which must be based entirely on their respective performances against Anderson Silva, with Sonnen lasting roughly six and a half rounds and Griffin lasting roughly three and a half minutes. But those were a long three and a half minutes, you guys, like watching the puppy you got for Christmas fall through the ice in your Grandma’s pond and drown in slow motion…on that very same Christmas.
Needless to say, if this blatant disrespect doesn’t light a fire under Griffin’s ass, nothing will. We feel like we’ve typed that a lot lately.
Is that line as bad as we’re making it out to be? Join us after the jump for a good old fashioned head-to-head breakdown to see if our outrage is justified.
AGE
Griffin: 33 (but a nearing retirement 33)
Sonnen: 35
Advantage: Somehow Sonnen
SIZE
Griffin: 6’3″, 77 inch reach, walks around at 240 lbs
Sonnen: 6’1″, 74 inch reach, walked around at 205lbs 24 hours before fights at middleweight
Advantage: Griffin by an entire Wendy’s menu
LAST TWO FIGHTS RESULTED IN
Griffin: 1st round KO loss to Mauricio Rua, razor-thin SD win over Tito Ortiz
Sonnen: Razor-thin UD win over Michael Bisping, 2nd round TKO loss to Anderson Silva
Advantage: Sonnen, we guess
REMATCH RECORD
Griffin: 3-1
Sonnen: 3-3
Advantage: Griffin
FINISHING RATIO
Griffin: 52.6% (10 finishes in 19 victories)
Sonnen: 40.7% (11 finishes in 27 victories)
Advantage: Griffin
Disadvantage: The fans
SALARY
Griffin: $125,000 to show
Sonnen: $50,000 to show
Advantage: Griffin
CAREER ACCOMPLISHMENTS
Griffin: Won inaugural season of The Ultimate Fighter in arguably the greatest MMA fight of all time. Defeated Quinton Jackson when he was still relevant to become UFC Light Heavyweight Champion. Four time “Fight of the Night” winner and two time “Submission of the Night Winner”.
Sonnen: NCAA Division 1 All American. Defeated Paulo Filho at the exact moment he became irrelevant to unofficially win WEC Light Heavyweight Championship. Two time “Fight of the Night” winner. Headlined the highest live gate for a UFC event in the promotion’s history.
Advantage: Griffin, via accomplishments in the form of a belt
BOOK TITLES
Griffin: Be Ready When The Shit Goes Down: A Survival Guide to the Apocalypse and Got Fight?: 50 Zen Principles of Hand-to-Face Combat
Sonnen: The Voice of Reason: A VIP Pass to Enlightenment
Advantage: Sonnen via arrogance
WHO WORE TRT BETTER AT UFC 148
Griffin: Looked sloppy and spent by the third round, then decided to storm out of the cage shortly thereafter despite the fact that he had won
Sonnen: Managed to dominate Silva in the first round, then committed the biggest mental error of his career in the second
Advantage: Sonnen
ARREST RECORD
Griffin: None to our knowledge
Sonnen: Pled guilty to money laundering (don’t you dare call it mortgage fraud!!) and received two years probation and a $10,000 fine.
Advantage: Griffin
TWITTER PERSONA
Griffin: Rape advocate
Sonnen: Master Troller
Advantage: Sonnen
PREDICTION: Based on these completely valid, scientifically proven points, Griffin will keep Sonnen at a distance with his jab and defend just enough take downs to eek out a Split Decision victory.
