Tag: reality television

‘TUF 19? to Feature 185-Pound Men, 205-Pound Women (Not Really, But Could You Imagine?)


Bas Rutten poses with a future UFC women’s Gibraltarweight champion. Image via (COVER YOUR EYES!!) Rutten’s Facebook.

It’s a credit to reality television that it has managed to both continuously lower our expectations regarding what is an idea worthy of verbalizing (looking at you, everything on Bravo excluding Top Chef) while simultaneously redefining what we consider a “season” of television. Whereas in simpler times, a show like Seinfeld would operate at a one season per year pace, reality TV has somehow managed to dilute even the most basic of television truths, cramming upwards of four seasons into the average year. Not to mention all the spin offs. My God, all the spin offs.

The Ultimate Fighter is one of the more notable offenders of this trend, now 18 seasons deep despite being less than 10 years old. Another favorite of mine, Chopped, also requires a mention, now 14 seasons deep in just 4 years (!!). Yes, the cheap production costs and minimal staffing required for the average reality show has seen them churned out at near breakneck speed, which is why it makes sense that in the same week we received our first glimpse of TUF 18, the UFC is already putting out a casting call for TUF 19.

According to release sent out by UFC.com early today, next season’s tryouts will be open to MEN (their emphasis, not ours) competing in the middleweight and light heavyweight divisions. The requirements are as follows:


Bas Rutten poses with a future UFC women’s Gibraltarweight champion. Image via (COVER YOUR EYES!!) Rutten’s Facebook.

It’s a credit to reality television that it has managed to both continuously lower our expectations regarding what is an idea worthy of verbalizing (looking at you, everything on Bravo excluding Top Chef) while simultaneously redefining what we consider a “season” of television. Whereas in simpler times, a show like Seinfeld would operate at a one season per year pace, reality TV has somehow managed to dilute even the most basic of television truths, cramming upwards of four seasons into the average year. Not to mention all the spin offs. My God, all the spin offs.

The Ultimate Fighter is one of the more notable offenders of this trend, now 18 seasons deep despite being less than 10 years old. Another favorite of mine, Chopped, also requires a mention, now 14 seasons deep in just 4 years (!!). Yes, the cheap production costs and minimal staffing required for the average reality show has seen them churned out at near breakneck speed, which is why it makes sense that in the same week we received our first glimpse of TUF 18, the UFC is already putting out a casting call for TUF 19.

According to release sent out by UFC.com early today, next season’s tryouts will be open to MEN (their emphasis, not ours) competing in the middleweight and light heavyweight divisions. The requirements are as follows:

1. All applicants must between 21 and 34 years of age.

2. All applicants MUST have a WINNING RECORD of at least 3 PROFESSIONAL MMA fights. All records will be verified on sherdog.com and mixedmartialarts.com. If we cannot verify your record on either of these sites you will NOT be considered.

3. All applicants must have the legal ability to live and work in the United States

4. All applicants must complete and sign the application and bring the completed and signed forms to the tryouts. All applicants must attend the tryouts on Tuesday, August 27th 2013 in Indianapolis, Indiana. 

If you recall, middleweights were the focus of last year’s season’s TUF 17, with current welterweight Kelvin Gastelum eventually securing that awesome glass plaque. Minus the upcoming season, the total number of middleweight classes to pass through the TUF household is at 7. The total number of middleweight title contenders to emerge from said classes: 2. One was Travis Lutter, who failed to make weight for his title fight against Anderson Silva at UFC 67. The other was Patrick Cote, whose knee imploded in the third round of his fight with Silva at UFC 90. That Paul Bradley, though, he could have really made some waves at 185.

–J. Jones

The Next Big Dumb Thing is Here: ‘Warrior Island’

After watching several cartoonishly corny videos (the first above, more of which we will subject you to after the jump) we’re not sure what “Warrior Island” is, exactly, but from the little we can glean it is even more stupid than X-Arm. If you’re not familiar with X-Arm, watch this and realize the magnitude of the above claim.

We’ll mostly let the videos speak for themselves but it appears as if something called Global Proving Ground (GPG, to help this future pop culture phenomenon get rolling) is pitching a reality competition television show that will, in some way, include martial artists pitted against one another on an island. They are holding tryouts – you don’t want to miss the audition tapes below – and we, the ardent GPG fans will vote on who we want to see on the island, or something to that effect.

Oh yeah, they are also trying to bilk “fighters” out of $9.95/month for supposedly expert advice from a tatted up doctor that looks like every annoying guy at any MMA event ever.

In the opening trailer we see several shirtless, fat men running pained and barefoot through some vaguely Polynesian beach forest, at least one emaciated looking dude doing the same, and an unidentified Dan Severn jogging with a gray t shirt on.

The camera cuts to other exotic locations where actors perform the clunkiest sparring demonstrations you’ve ever seen: The world’s least flexible ninja doing Karate, two guys battling ever. so. slowly. with Wu Shu swords on the Great Wall of China, or something, while tinny-sounding sword clashing audio is superimposed over the video. Wait until you see the thrilling Pankration demonstration or the two guys who don’t know what Sambo is, demonstrating what Sambo is.

The audition tapes contain one perfectly nice gentleman that says he’s practiced Kung Fu every day since 1970. As he prances around delicately, completely off balance for fighting at almost every juncture, take comfort knowing that, no matter how bad your day is going, at least you haven’t wasted 42 years of your life doing something useless every day.

Audition tapes and an appeal from Dr. Douchebag after the jump.

After watching several cartoonishly corny videos (the first above, more of which we will subject you to after the jump) we’re not sure what “Warrior Island” is, exactly, but from the little we can glean it is even more stupid than X-Arm. If you’re not familiar with X-Arm, watch this and realize the magnitude of the above claim.

We’ll mostly let the videos speak for themselves but it appears as if something called Global Proving Ground (GPG, to help this future pop culture phenomenon get rolling) is pitching a reality competition television show that will, in some way, include martial artists pitted against one another on an island. They are holding tryouts – you don’t want to miss the audition tapes below – and we, the ardent GPG fans will vote on who we want to see on the island, or something to that effect.

Oh yeah, they are also trying to bilk “fighters” out of $9.95/month for supposedly expert advice from a tatted up doctor that looks like every annoying guy at any MMA event ever.

In the opening trailer we see several shirtless, fat men running pained and barefoot through some vaguely Polynesian beach forest, at least one emaciated looking dude doing the same, and an unidentified Dan Severn jogging with a gray t shirt on.

The camera cuts to other exotic locations where actors perform the clunkiest sparring demonstrations you’ve ever seen: The world’s least flexible ninja doing Karate, two guys battling ever. so. slowly. with Wu Shu swords on the Great Wall of China, or something, while tinny-sounding sword clashing audio is superimposed over the video. Wait until you see the thrilling Pankration demonstration or the two guys who don’t know what Sambo is, demonstrating what Sambo is.

The audition tapes contain one perfectly nice gentleman that says he’s practiced Kung Fu every day since 1970. As he prances around delicately, completely off balance for fighting at almost every juncture, take comfort knowing that, no matter how bad your day is going, at least you haven’t wasted 42 years of your life doing something useless every day.

Audition tapes and an appeal from Dr. Douchebag after the jump.

The biggest dufus in the videos, however, is the interviewer who, when he comes in to frame, we realize is wearing a camouflage hat, a black gi and an American flag-colored belt. This is the guy in charge, ladies and gentlemen.

They also have a mentally disabled kid auditioning. So there’s that.

Not only is this sham of an organization ok with insulting an audience and trying to swindle perfectly healthy adults, they’re also fine with stringing along mentally disabled folks. That kid is only guy in the video with credibility, as far as we’re concerned, and we hope that off camera he beat the crap out of everyone else in the room.

Looks like he probably could.

Audition Tapes:

Dr. Douchebag:

– Elias Cepeda