Tag: Why is Bob Sapp still fighting

VIDEO: Another Bob Sapp “TKO”, and the New “Bob Sapp Challenge”

(Video props: YouTube/MMAVictor)

There’s nothing new about Bob Sapp losing a fight without dignity, but every week he seems to hone his craft as an MMA-Theatre master thespian. A typical Sapp fight consists of him lumbering in toward his opponent, waiting until he feels incidental contact, then feigning a tko until the ref halts the bout. Wash–Rinse–Repeat. But last night he may have sunk to a new low in his bout against Soa Palelei at Cage Fighting Championship 21.

Sapp starts off the bout by touching gloves —just like they do in *real* MMA bouts! Too cute!–then he ducks his head and charges meanders forward toward “The Hulk”. This is his opponent’s cue to tag him with something—anything–that could count as a landed blow and explain his fall to the canvas. To his surprise, Sapp makes it all the way to the opposite side of the cage with Palelei nowhere to be found. Stupefied, he does the only thing he knows how: he teeters over.

As a real fighter with real intentions of fighting, Palelei tries to partake in the ‘takedown’ but his help is completely unnecessary. Sapp is all too happy to let gravity ease his menacing frame down to the canvas. And so the Australian does his thing, pounding away at a turtled-up Sapp, while Sapp does his thing, turtling-up while getting pounded. Although this isn’t the first bout where Sapp has succumbed to a phantom punch, at least his previous opponents were somewhere in the general vicinity when he fell.

The new rules of the Bob Sapp Challenge™ await you after the jump.

(Video props: YouTube/MMAVictor)

There’s nothing new about Bob Sapp losing a fight without dignity, but every week he seems to hone his craft as an MMA-Theatre master thespian. A typical Sapp fight consists of him lumbering in toward his opponent, waiting until he feels incidental contact, then feigning a tko until the ref halts the bout. Wash–Rinse–Repeat. But last night he may have sunk to a new low in his bout against Soa Palelei at Cage Fighting Championship 21.

Sapp starts off the bout by touching gloves –just like *real* fighters do, too cute!–then he ducks his head and charges meanders forward toward “The Hulk”. This is his opponent’s cue to tag him with something—anything–that could count as a landed blow and explain his fall to the canvas. To his surprise, Sapp makes it all the way to the opposite side of the cage with Palelei nowhere to be found. Stupefied, he does the only thing he knows how: he teeters over.

As a real fighter with real intentions of fighting, Palelei tries to partake in the ‘takedown’ but his help is completely unnecessary. Sapp is all too happy to let gravity ease his menacing frame down to the canvas. And so the Australian does his thing, pounding away at a turtled-up Sapp, while Sapp does his thing, turtling-up while getting pounded. Although this isn’t the first bout where Sapp has succumbed to a phantom punch, at least his previous opponents were somewhere in the general vicinity when he fell.

The new rules of the Bob Sapp Challenge™ await you after the jump.

Even though he willingly signed on for this farce, you’ve almost got to feel sorry for Palelei. The former UFC and Pride competitor got caught up in the emotional rush of a quick victory before coming to his senses on top of the cage–you can literally see the embarrassment for his involvement in this charade sweep over him in mid-celebration. Only Bob Sapp can muster up ‘winners regret’ in his opponent.

Now that the bar for defeating Sapp has been set at 12-seconds, it’s time to usher in the new Bob Sapp Challenge™. No longer should fighters strive to defeat him faster than ever before with fewer punches than previously thought possible. No, the new Bob Sapp Challenge™ should be to see how long you can force him to fight you. Who can drag him into the deep waters of minutes three or four of a fight? Who can land enough punches to leave a mark before he channels his inner-Greg Louganis. Future opponents: when Sapp falls down of his own accord, don’t swarm. Calmly back away and either force him to stand and continue the fight or shield himself from punches that will never arrive. I won’t chastise you for taking an easy payday with plenty of media attention, but don’t wallow in shame beside him. Make him fight you or make a display of his cowardice–whatever you do, don’t give his tired act a shred of legitimacy by giving him an easy way out.

 

– @ChrisColemon

 

[VIDEO] Hey, Bob Sapp Almost Put Up a Fight Last Weekend…Almost


(Photographic evidence that Sapp used to at least take a punch before calling it quits. Ah, the good old days.) 

There are only two things in this world that we here in the CP offices know to be true: Code Red is the without a doubt the best Mountain Dew spin-off of all time, and Bob Sapp will never win another fight. The bearer of perhaps the most ironic nickname in the sport already has two MMA fights lined up in May alone, but decided to kill some time last weekend by participating in a kickboxing match in Slovenia against Rok Strucl.

Though Sapp started off strong, meaning that he didn’t find a way to fake injury before the opening bell had finished resonating, what went down thereafter accomplished something we never thought possible: a new low for “The Beast.”

Join us after the jump for the video. 


(Photographic evidence that Sapp used to at least take a punch before calling it quits. Ah, the good old days.) 

There are only two things in this world that we here in the CP offices know to be true: Code Red is the without a doubt the best Mountain Dew spin-off of all time, and Bob Sapp will never win another fight. The bearer of perhaps the most ironic nickname in the sport already has two MMA fights lined up in May alone, but decided to kill some time last weekend by participating in a kickboxing match in Slovenia against Rok Strucl.

Though Sapp started off strong, meaning that he didn’t find a way to fake injury before the opening bell had finished resonating, what went down thereafter accomplished something we never thought possible: a new low for “The Beast.”


(Props to 12ozcurls for the find. One can only imagine the kind of S&M websites he was surfing until he arrived at this.) 

It shocks me, or perhaps more confuses me, to repeatedly watch someone who has been involved in combat sports for ten years show absolutely zero understanding of even the most fundamental aspects of their discipline. Such is Bob Sapp. The man throws punches like a drunken sorority girl caught in a wind storm, and doesn’t appear to be anything but horrified from a fight’s start to its finish, despite the fact that he usually holds upwards of one hundred pounds on all of his opponents. This is a “man” who defeated Ernesto Hoost twice for fuck’s sake, and look at him now. He’s like a turd that just keeps circling the drain, picking up pieces of other, more dignified turds that pass him by.

For the life of me, I cannot understand why any fighter who takes their job even remotely serious would agree to fight this pair of clown shoes. If you win, it’s because duh. If you lose…well, you can’t lose, but you get the point. And as if Sapp’s striking display wasn’t pathetic enough, skip ahead to the 1:20 mark for the beginning of the end. How does that end come about, you ask? During a typical Sapp exchange, which resembles something out of a Tasmanian Devil cartoon, “The Beast” simply falls to the ground when given the opening. Wikipedia currently has the loss listed as an “invisible punch,” which is the most correct description one could offer when trying to determine what exactly caused Sapp to come tumbling to the ground. Was it the delayed aftereffects of a liver strike? A twisted ankle? Or perhaps even a case of chronic vertigo?

Nope. It was just Bob Sapp being Bob Sapp. It’s incredible to realize that there are people in this world who can fail at failing, but Bob Sapp has brought that notion to light and nearly burned out my retina with it. And as the crowd released an oral mixture of pity and shame, often known as laughter, I yet again found myself stupefied by Sapp’s incompetence. Not only can the man not fight his way out of a wet napkin, he can’t even lose in convincing fashion.

But I’ve had enough.

I am calling you out, Sapp. You have disgraced more than one sport that I hold close to my heart for far too long, and it’s time to stop. That’s why I issue you the following challenge, you product of unchecked prison rape. You eater of bovine excrement. You human compost. You pud. Me versus you in a MMA match in the town of your choosing. The loser must sever all ties with the sport, be it as a fighter, a writer, or whatever it is you dare to call yourself these days. I may only weigh 160 pounds soaking wet, but after witnessing the walking travesty that you’ve called a career over the past decade, I can say with confidence that I would whoop your ass from here to the ebola-infested cave from whence you came. So bring it.

I await your response.

–J. Jones

Get an In-Depth Look at Bob Sapp’s Training Camp in the New ‘KSW 19? Trailer


(This is approximately how you will feel after watching the video.) 

You know, for all the bizarre shenanigans Rampage Jackson seems to be getting himself into these days, he will never hold a candle to Bob Sapp. At this point in “The Beast’s” career, he has pretty much become a walking punchline in every sense of the word; a parody of a parody, if you will. And though it is easy to take shots at perhaps the lowest hanging fruit in the MMA landscape, we’re going to do it anyway. Because we follow Bob Sapp for the same reason that people watch reality television — to feel better about themselves afterward. He is the Troll 2 of mixed martial arts, a fighter so terrible that one only watches him participate out of a need to feel ironic. Why can’t we look away, you ask? Because white america has never felt less threatened by a 300 pound muscular black man in the history of its existence, and we like the feeling.

Clearly Sapp has begun to embrace this image to its fullest extent, for what else can one do when in the midst of what will likely become a record setting losing streak? If you don’t believe us, just check out the promo he made for his upcoming May 12th KSW 19 clash with Mariusz Pudzianowski, courtesy of IronForgesIron. In a word, it is a revelation.


(This is approximately how you will feel after watching the video.) 

You know, for all the bizarre shenanigans Rampage Jackson seems to be getting himself into these days, he will never hold a candle to Bob Sapp. At this point in “The Beast’s” career, he has pretty much become a walking punchline in every sense of the word; a parody of a parody, if you will. And though it is easy to take shots at perhaps the lowest hanging fruit in the MMA landscape, we’re going to do it anyway. Because we follow Bob Sapp for the same reason that people watch reality television — to feel better about themselves afterward. He is the Troll 2 of mixed martial arts, a fighter so terrible that one only watches him participate out of a need to feel ironic. Why can’t we look away, you ask? Because white america has never felt less threatened by a 300 pound muscular black man in the history of its existence, and we like the feeling.

Clearly Sapp has begun to embrace this image to its fullest extent, for what else can one do when in the midst of what will likely become a record setting losing streak? If you don’t believe us, just check out the promo he made for his upcoming May 12th KSW 19 clash with Mariusz Pudzianowski, courtesy of IronForgesIron. In a word, it is a revelation.

Well, that just happened.

From a technical standpoint, a credit is due to Sapp’s 8 year-old niece for her ability to hold the camera so still. We’re not sure if she shot this, or if Sapp has an eight year old niece for that matter, but we dare the actual person responsible for this visual diarrhea to come forward and claim otherwise.

Aside from that, this video may just contain the most blasphemous use of the Rocky theme that we have ever seen/heard. Truly upsetting.

A few other things of note:

-Sapp prefers to consume his eggs by biting the shell and spitting the contents into the nearest sink

-He is under the impression that he is fighting someone named “Mario” on May 12th

-He REALLY enjoys evil-laughing.

-What’s with the fake scars?

-Were those literally the best highlights they could find from Sapp’s entire career?!

-We’ll admit that the Tonka Truck bit was mildly amusing. Congrats.

The promo clocks in at one minute and thirty-seven seconds. We’d like you, Potato Nation, to place your bets on the over/under for the fight itself in the comments section.

-J. Jones

Mismatch of the Century Alert: Soa Palelei to Face Bob Sapp at CFC 21 in April

(Sapp’s most recent effort attempt “showing” against James Thompson. How do you know it’s a Bob Sapp joint? Because the introductions are twice as long as the fight.) 

In the difficult economic times that we are currently experiencing, Bob Sapp’s continual ability to stay employed as a “fighter” is nothing short of inspiring. And by inspiring, we mean infuriating. The man has fought nine times in the past three years, totaling just over fifteen minutes of ring time. There is not a doubt in any of our minds that the time he spent training for those fights was less than half of that. He has lost all but one of those contests, and word has it that the one man he defeated committed Sepukku shortly thereafter. Yet he continues to get work. He lost his last fight by submission due to (fake) leg injury, and tapped out to approximately two punches thrown by a BJJ expert in the fight before that. Yet he continues to get work.

Perhaps it is a sign, like the popularity of Jersey Shore or Nicki Minaj, that our culture has truly done a 180 in terms of what we consider worthy of our attention. Where in days past, it was a person’s abilities that brought them into the public eye, it seems now more than ever that we as a society are fixated with people who lack any discernable talent whatsoever.

Bob Sapp is living, breathing proof of this phenomenon.

Thankfully, it looks as if Sapp may finally be forced to take on a fighter who could make him reconsider his line of work altogether; someone who could possibly knock Sapp out cold before he gets the chance to call it quits. That man is none other than UFC veteran Soa Palelei, who is scheduled to take on Sapp at Cage Fighting Championships 21 on April 20th.

If there is a God, he will not allow Bob Sapp to walk away from this fight completely intact.


(Sapp’s most recent effort attempt ”showing” against James Thompson. How do you know it’s a Bob Sapp joint? Because the introductions are twice as long as the fight.) 

In the difficult economic times that we are currently experiencing, Bob Sapp’s continual ability to stay employed as a “fighter” is nothing short of inspiring. And by inspiring, we mean infuriating. The man has fought nine times in the past three years, totaling just over fifteen minutes of ring time. There is not a doubt in any of our minds that the time he spent training for those fights was less than half of that. He has lost all but one of those contests, and word has it that the one man he defeated committed Sepukku shortly thereafter. Yet he continues to get work. He lost his last fight by submission due to (fake) leg injury, and tapped out to approximately two punches thrown by a BJJ expert in the fight before that. Yet he continues to get work.

Perhaps it is a sign, like the popularity of Jersey Shore or Nicki Minaj, that our culture has truly done a 180 in terms of what we consider worthy of our attention. Where in days past, it was a person’s abilities that brought them into the public eye, it seems now more than ever that we as a society are fixated with people who lack any discernable talent whatsoever.

Bob Sapp is living, breathing proof of this phenomenon.

Thankfully, it looks as if Sapp may finally be forced to take on a fighter who could make him reconsider his line of work altogether; someone who could possibly knock Sapp out cold before he gets the chance to call it quits. That man is none other than UFC veteran Soa Palelei, who is scheduled to take on Sapp at Cage Fighting Championships 21 on April 20th.

If there is a God, he will not allow Bob Sapp to walk away from this fight completely intact.

Since being bounced from the UFC following a third round TKO loss to Eddie Sanchez at UFC 79, Palelei has gone 7-1 and is currently riding a five fight win streak, with all of those victories coming by way of first round (T)KO. The last fight of Palelei’s we reported on was a brutal 28 second KO of Son Hai Suk at the AFC event that saw Bellator middleweight champion Hector Lombard submit TUF 7 finalist Jesse Taylor via second round heel hook.

One interesting fact heading into his fight with Sapp is that Palelei is expected to square off against 3-0 slugger Joe Kielur just six days beforehand. Let’s hope he doesn’t injure himself and is able to deliver the just beating Sapp truly deserves.

Also scheduled to throw down at CFC 21 are respectable MMA veterans Jeff Monson and Jim York. Monson was recently able to rebound from a unanimous decision loss to Fedor Emilianenko back in November with a decision victory of his own over Alexey Oleinik just ten days ago. York, a Sengoku and KOTC veteran, has not fought since scoring a first round TKO over Lucas Browne in November of 2010.

No other bouts are scheduled for CFC 21 as of this moment. Now here’s a video of Bob Sapp getting rag-dolled by a man one-third his size.

Amen.

-J. Jones

Hot Potato: OneFC’s New Ring Girl Park Si Hyun

One Fighting Championships has seen some ups and downs since its inception last year. After a successful debut event, they hit a slight bump in the road by agreeing to take part in the charade that is Bob Sapp. Thankfully, they’ve more than made up for that mistake by signing Korean Model Park Si Hyun to carry the cards for all of its events, starting with the upcoming Babalu/Manhoef headlined One FC 3. This former “race queen” is among the most popular and successful models in South Korea, and rightfully so. Find out all you need to know about Park (ie. more incredibly attractive photos of her) over on her Red Flava page. No, we do not know what a Red Flava page is, so click at your own risk.

One Fighting Championships has seen some ups and downs since its inception last year. After a successful debut event, they hit a slight bump in the road by agreeing to partake in the charade that is Bob Sapp. Thankfully, they’ve more than made up for that mistake by signing Korean model Park Si Hyun to carry the cards for all of its future events, starting with the upcoming Babalu/Manhoef headlined One FC 3. This former “race queen” is among the most popular and successful models in South Korea, and rightfully so. Find out all you need to know about Park (ie. more incredibly attractive photos of her) over on her Red Flava page. No, we do not know what a Red Flava page is, so click at your own risk.