[VIDEO] Stephan Bonnar Details His Gameplan to Beat Anderson Silva and It Is a Doozy


(Step 1: Fake heart attack to lower Anderson’s guard. Step 2: ?????? Step 3: SCORE GREATEST UPSET OF ALL TIME.) 

Admit it: When the new headliner for UFC 153 was first announced, not one of you thought Stephan Bonnar stood a chance of beating Anderson Silva, and you probably still don’t. If you happen to be a bookie, you probably equate the likelihood of Bonnar defeating Silva to that of Bob Sapp defeating adult onset vaginitis.

Well, my friends, prepare to have your minds blown, because Bonnar’s camp just released a video that lays out in intricate detail his plans to dethrone (figuratively speaking) the untouchable legacy of “The Spider” once and for all. We’re not saying it is foolproof, but we are saying that it has no discernible flaws whatsoever and Silva is a dead man.

Video after the jump. 


(Step 1: Fake heart attack to lower Anderson’s guard. Step 2: ?????? Step 3: SCORE GREATEST UPSET OF ALL TIME.) 

Admit it: When the new headliner for UFC 153 was first announced, not one of you thought Stephan Bonnar stood a chance of beating Anderson Silva, and you probably still don’t. If you happen to be a bookie, you probably equate the likelihood of Bonnar defeating Silva to that of Bob Sapp defeating adult onset vaginitis.

Well, my friends, prepare to have your minds blown, because Bonnar’s camp just released a video that lays out in intricate detail his plans to dethrone (figuratively speaking) the untouchable legacy of “The Spider” once and for all. We’re not saying it is foolproof, but we are saying that it has no discernible flaws whatsoever and Silva is a dead man.

Video after the jump. 

“Go underneath on him!” just replaced “ball up some fists” as the single greatest piece of training advice we have ever heard.

It was nice knowing you, Andy.

J. Jones

A Note To All Flyweights: Michael Bisping Can Make Fun of *You*, Not the Other Way Around

(Benavidez REALLY lets Bisping have it at the 4:05 mark. That is sarcasm, by the way.)

It used to simply surprise me each time someone raced to defend the actions of Michael Bisping after we had given him the public tongue-lashing he so rightfully deserved, be it for his coaching exploits, his insistence on insulting every middleweight he comes across, or his general dickishness when alcohol is involved. His supporters, whom I can only assume are as crass, doltish, and incoherent as the subject at hand, often label us “anti-British,” because clearly Bisping’s ancestry is at the forefront of our issues with the guy, not the relentless douchbaggery he displays at every conceivable opportunity. But over the years, I’ve come to realize that no matter how sound a given argument is, there will always be a minority rallying against it. It’s why Old Dad was recently lambasted by the readers over at MMAJunkie for declaring that Brock Lesnar and all 8 of his professional fights had not earned him a spot in the UFC Hall of Fame because he had helped the sport get some fans (bring it on, bitches!). And it’s undoubtedly why some of you — for God knows what reason — will always be quick to defend the hooley-hoo punk-ass jabroni known as Count Bisping (seriously, BRING IT ON!).

Take his recent squabble with the UFC’s flyweight division, for instance. With no clear motivation (other than being billed below them at UFC 152), Bisping decided to launch into a diatribe aimed at the 125-pounders, declaring that “no one cares about little flyweights.” Bisping continued his attack at the UFC 152 press conference, where, when forced to deal with a response from Joseph Benavidez, stated that “when you were a glint in your dad’s eye, I was kicking ass in the UFC,” which makes sense because AGE IS DETERMINED BY HEIGHT AND WEIGHT AND THAT’S IT SHUT UP. Benavidez, along with most of us who can subtract 28 from 33, dismissed Bisping’s comments as “ridiculous” and moved on. However, when Benavidez was asked by teammate Urijah Faber in the “fighter diary” above if he thought he hit harder than Bisping, he nonchalantly declared that yes, he believed he did.

This was the kind of insolence that Bisping would simply not tolerate.

After the jump: Bisping’s response, which is as eloquently phrased and intelligent as Winston Churchill’s epic pwnage of Nancy Astor.


(Benavidez REALLY lets Bisping have it at the 4:05 mark. That is sarcasm, by the way.)

It used to simply surprise me each time someone raced to defend the actions of Michael Bisping after we had given him the public tongue-lashing he so rightfully deserved, be it for his coaching exploits, his insistence on insulting every middleweight he comes across, or his general dickishness when alcohol is involved. His supporters, whom I can only assume are as crass, doltish, and incoherent as the subject at hand, often label us “anti-British,” because clearly Bisping’s ancestry is at the forefront of our issues with the guy, not the relentless douchbaggery he displays at every conceivable opportunity. But over the years, I’ve come to realize that no matter how sound a given argument is, there will always be a minority rallying against it. It’s why Old Dad was recently lambasted by the readers over at MMAJunkie for declaring that Brock Lesnar and all 8 of his professional fights had not earned him a spot in the UFC Hall of Fame because he had helped the sport get some fans (bring it on, bitches!). And it’s undoubtedly why some of you — for God knows what reason — will always be quick to defend the hooley-hoo punk-ass jabroni known as Count Bisping (seriously, BRING IT ON!).

Take his recent squabble with the UFC’s flyweight division, for instance. With no clear motivation (other than being billed below them at UFC 152), Bisping decided to launch into a diatribe aimed at the 125-pounders, declaring that “no one cares about little flyweights.” Bisping continued his attack at the UFC 152 press conference, where, when forced to deal with a response from Joseph Benavidez, stated that “when you were a glint in your dad’s eye, I was kicking ass in the UFC,” which makes sense because AGE IS DETERMINED BY HEIGHT AND WEIGHT AND THAT’S IT SHUT UP. Benavidez, along with most of us who can subtract 28 from 33, dismissed Bisping’s comments as “ridiculous” and moved on. However, when Benavidez was asked by teammate Urijah Faber in the “fighter diary” above if he thought he hit harder than Bisping, he nonchalantly declared that yes, he believed he did.

This was the kind of insolence that Bisping would simply not tolerate.

As is typically the case for shit-stirring fighters like Bisping, the TUF 3 winner truly cannot take it as well as he can dish it out. Bisping recently declared “Pepsi Challenge” war on Benavidez for his off-the-cuff remark, even going as far as to say that Benavidez had somehow started their whole verbal quarrel in the first place. He spoke with MMAJunkie radio:

That smug-faced little t— in a prepubescent boy’s body needs to shut the f— up because I’ll take the Pepsi Challenge with that short-ass any day of the week.

People are going to say that I’m talking crap, but he’s the one trying to start in with me. [Benavidez] needs to recognize his weight class because my 11-year-old boy will take care of him.

Those of us who maintain the ability to recall basic information from less than a month ago should see the main flaw in Bisping’s argument: He did in fact start it. He always starts it. It’s this kind of willful ignorance that makes you wonder if Bisping is suffering from a Leonard Shelby-esque syndrome where he convinces himself that each person he sees is really the man who fictitiously raped and killed his wife. Of course, an H-bomb as epic as the one he received could easily be responsible for such a condition, so perhaps we should stop making fun of Bisping’s shortcomings as a human being and start being concerned for his mental health. On second thought, fuck that.

And as is usually the case when arguing with a wall, Benavidez was short and to the point in his response, posting the following on his twitter:

Wow didn’t think a big, tough, secure guy like @bisping would get all butt hurt at my blog. Pretty funny.

It’s funny because Benavidez is saying the opposite of what he really means, something Bisping will surely overlook in his profanity-filled response.

J. Jones

Mondays Suck, So Here’s Arianny Celeste in Various States of Undress [VIDEO]

No, I did not alter the title of this photo.
(“OK, Ms. Celeste, we want this calendar to reflect both your future and your past, which is why I’m going to need you to kick in the window of that Ferrari for this next shot.”)

Allow me to take you through my thought process whilst attempting to determine a worthy enough post this morning:

OK, Jared, another weekend, another dead hooker in the trunk, but that’s not important, you must focus on an MMA-related topic for the time being…let’s see here, Nick Ring has his next fight booked against Constantinos Philippou at UFC 154, but no one cares about that………dammit, Latisha, you just had to threaten to call Big Ron again, didn’t you?! Focus, focus…uh…Marloes Coenen said Ronda Rousey has “no balls”…I suppose that is true, but not really newsworthy, because bitches be crazy, right Latisha? *attempts high five, receives no response*….think Jared, what would the Potato Nation like to start their Monday off with? *looks over to Latisha once again*…TITS. Of course, it’s so obvious! Time to break out the lime, I mean computer, and get started!

So while it may not be all that significant that a behind-the-scenes video of Arianny Celeste’s 2013 Calendar shoot was recently released online, please trust that this is probably the most captivating bit of news you could come across this morning given the options at hand. So just shut up and enjoy Ms. Celeste rocking no shirt like only she can.

Video after the jump. 

No, I did not alter the title of this photo.
(“OK, Ms. Celeste, we want this calendar to reflect both your future and your past, which is why I’m going to need you to kick in the window of that Ferrari for this next shot.”)

Allow me to take you through my thought process whilst attempting to determine a worthy enough post this morning:

OK, Jared, another weekend, another dead hooker in the trunk, but that’s not important, you must focus on an MMA-related topic for the time being…let’s see here, Nick Ring has his next fight booked against Constantinos Philippou at UFC 154, but no one cares about that………dammit, Latisha, you just had to threaten to call Big Ron again, didn’t you?! Focus, focus…uh…Marloes Coenen said Ronda Rousey has “no balls”…I suppose that is true, but not really newsworthy, because bitches be crazy, right Latisha? *attempts high five, receives no response*….think Jared, what would the Potato Nation like to start their Monday off with? *looks over to Latisha once again*…TITS. Of course, it’s so obvious! Time to break out the lime, I mean computer, and get started!

So while it may not be all that significant that a behind-the-scenes video of Arianny Celeste’s 2013 Calendar shoot was recently released online, please trust that this is probably the most captivating bit of news you could come across this morning given the options at hand. So just shut up and enjoy Ms. Celeste rocking no shirt like only she can.

YOU’RE WELCOME.

Related: Behind-the-scenes of Brittney Palmer’s 2013 calendar shoot, which contains way more badonkadonk by all accounts.

J. Jones

[VIDEO] Robert De Niro, Tom Cruise, Will Ferrell & More React to the Cancellation of UFC 151

Via none other than the bossman’s Twitter account, here is the funniest thing you will see all day. I’m going to go as far as to say that it completely negates the fact that we were deprived of a pay-per-view oh so long ago. Then again, it’s Friday, and I’m already drunk. Have a great weekend, Potato Nation!

J. Jones

Via none other than the bossman’s Twitter account, here is the funniest thing you will see all day. I’m going to go as far as to say that it completely negates the fact that we were deprived of a pay-per-view oh so long ago. Then again, it’s Friday, and I’m already drunk. Have a great weekend, Potato Nation!

J. Jones

Alan Belcher vs. Yushin Okami II Slated for UFC 155 on December 29th


(“What?! Vitor’s fighting who now? God damn you, JC, you are really bending me over a barrel here!”) 

How the tides have shifted.

When Alan Belcher and Yushin Okami first met at UFC 62 all the way back in August of 2006, both men were actually making their promotional debut. In a hard fought contest, Okami used his superior grappling prowess to reel in a unanimous decision victory over “The Talent,” and would follow the victory with three more before dropping a unanimous decision to Rich Franklin at UFC 72. Belcher, on the other hand, would rebound from the defeat by scoring a head kick KO over woeful UFC washout Jorge Santiago, then dropping a third round submission via Brabo choke to TUF 3 winner Kendall Grove.

Since then, Okami has compiled a 10-4 record in the UFC, including wins over a certain Strikeforce welterweight champion and a certain injury-plagued middleweight contender, a title losing bid to Anderson Silva at UFC 134, and a shocking third round upset at the hands of Tim Boetsch that was responsible for the greatest Joe Rogan meltdown in UFC history. Belcher has gone 8-3, with an upset loss of his own to Jason Day and notable wins over Patrick Cote, Ed Herman, and most recently Rousimar Palhares. It should be noted, and has been on several occasions, that his victory over Palhares made one CagePotato writer look like a complete a-hole.

But although Belcher was a considerable underdog heading into their first contest, one has to imagine that he may find himself the favorite heading into their rematch at UFC 155 in light of their recent momentum swings.


(“What?! Vitor’s fighting who now? God damn you, JC, you are really bending me over a barrel here!”) 

How the tides have shifted.

When Alan Belcher and Yushin Okami first met at UFC 62 all the way back in August of 2006, both men were actually making their promotional debut. In a hard fought contest, Okami used his superior grappling prowess to reel in a unanimous decision victory over “The Talent,” and would follow the victory with three more before dropping a unanimous decision to Rich Franklin at UFC 72. Belcher, on the other hand, would rebound from the defeat by scoring a head kick KO over woeful UFC washout Jorge Santiago, then dropping a third round submission via Brabo choke to TUF 3 winner Kendall Grove.

Since then, Okami has compiled a 10-4 record in the UFC, including wins over a certain Strikeforce welterweight champion and a certain injury-plagued middleweight contender, a title losing bid to Anderson Silva at UFC 134, and a shocking third round upset at the hands of Tim Boetsch that was responsible for the greatest Joe Rogan meltdown in UFC history. Belcher has gone 8-3, with an upset loss of his own to Jason Day and notable wins over Patrick Cote, Ed Herman, and most recently Rousimar Palhares. It should be noted, and has been on several occasions, that his victory over Palhares made one CagePotato writer look like a complete a-hole.

But although Belcher was a considerable underdog heading into their first contest, one has to imagine that he may find himself the favorite heading into their rematch at UFC 155 in light of their recent momentum swings. Belcher’s ground game has looked nothing short of outstanding as of late, and his striking has always been top notch. The outlier here, as was the case in their first matchup, lies in Belcher’s ability to defend the takedown and/or deal with the ridiculous top control that Okami displayed throughout his career, especially in his recent win over Buddy Roberts.

So it’s not exactly the title-earning fight with Belfort or a shot at Chris Weidman that Belcher was asking for, but a chance to erase his very first UFC loss has to be enough to get “The Talent” motivated.

UFC 155 is set to go down on December 29th and is rife with rematches. Not only does the main event feature a heavyweight title rematch between Junior Dos Santos and Cain Velasquez, but Chael Sonnen will be looking to even a score of his own in a light heavyweight rematch with Forrest Griffin.

So what do you think, Potato Nation? Will Belcher score some much earned redemption, or will Okami reign taco supreme once again?

J. Jones

[GALLERY] 16 Photos of Kyra Gracie Boxing and/or Looking Hot

For the past few years, the MMA world has been anxiously awaiting the debut of a certain Brazilian grappling phenom with a list of credentials that reads like “been there, done that” of the BJJ landscape. No, not Braulio Estima, although seeing him pick up his first MMA win was pretty outstanding. We’re talking about none other than Kyra Gracie, who has been honing her boxing skills with Claudio Coelho for the past two years in preparation for her MMA debut, which she promises will happen by the end of 2012.

Recently, Brazilian fight site BJJPix.com did a photoshoot with Kyra during one such training session, so we’ve decided to compile a collection of those photos, along with some generally enticing photos of Kyra, for your enjoyment. Because like we said, you could use a distraction. Check out the gallery after the jump, and make sure to follow Kyra on Twitter. Who knows, if she gets enough followers, maybe they’ll book her against Ronda Rousey just for the hell of it. One can only fap…I mean dream!

J. Jones

For the past few years, the MMA world has been anxiously awaiting the debut of a certain Brazilian grappling phenom with a list of credentials that reads like “been there, done that” of the BJJ landscape. No, not Braulio Estima, although seeing him pick up his first MMA win was pretty outstanding. We’re talking about none other than Kyra Gracie, who has been honing her boxing skills with Claudio Coelho for the past two years in preparation for her MMA debut, which she promises will happen by the end of 2012.

Recently, Brazilian fight site BJJPix.com did a photoshoot with Kyra during one such training session, so we’ve decided to compile a collection of those photos, along with some generally enticing photos of Kyra, for your enjoyment. Because like we said, you could use a distraction. Check out the gallery after the jump, and make sure to follow Kyra on Twitter. Who knows, if she gets enough followers, maybe they’ll book her against Ronda Rousey just for the hell of it. One can only fap…I mean dream!

J. Jones