Ask the Potato: Injuries, TRT and Crossover Athletes


You know, Potato Nation, Coleman just really likes potatoes. I mean, I know that’s not profound or nothin’. Heck! We all do…but for him, it goes much more beyond that.

So how many of you all came here last weekend only to be disappointed by the lack of answers to your seemingly endless questions? Maybe we’re getting too far ahead of ourselves, so let’s start over: How many of you noticed that we didn’t run a new edition of Ask the Potato last week? We just saw at least three hands go up, so we’re going to assume that the rest of you are just too shy to respond. We’re keeping it short and sweet and to the point this week, much unlike this sentence, so let’s get down to business.

KarmaAteMyCat asks: What’s the most vicious injury you have ever seen in MMA to date?


You know, Potato Nation, Coleman just really likes potatoes. I mean, I know that’s not profound or nothin’. Heck! We all do…but for him, it goes much more beyond that.

So how many of you all came here last weekend only to be disappointed by the lack of answers to your seemingly endless questions? Maybe we’re getting too far ahead of ourselves, so let’s start over: How many of you noticed that we didn’t run a new edition of Ask the Potato last week? We just saw at least three hands go up, so we’re going to assume that the rest of you are just too shy to respond. We’re keeping it short and sweet and to the point this week, much unlike this sentence, so let’s get down to business.

KarmaAteMyCat asks: What’s the most vicious injury you have ever seen in MMA to date?

Injuries are pretty common in this sport, particularly if you’re a champion. From swollen heads to flayed feet, we’d like to think we’ve seen it all over the years. But of all the limbs to snap inside the cage, our nominee has a clear leg up on the competition. Just seconds into the second round of their UFC: Fight for the Troops bout, Dale Hartt checked a leg kick from Corey Hill, instantly transforming his tibia and fibula into giant sticks of Laffy Taffy. Unlike Joe Theismann’s famous injury, there was no sock or pant leg to shield viewers from the sight of his twisted, mangled leg. Another key difference: Hill returned to competition only one year later; in fact, he just racked up a win last week. Think there’s a more deserving injury? We’re all ear!

Giblets asks: TRT – Really a medical issue or a loop hole for gear monkeys?

We’re hack journalists, Giblets, not doctors. But that doesn’t stop us from performing breast exams or doling out pills behind the neighborhood 7-Eleven, and it sure as hell isn’t going to stop us from answering your question.

Testosterone is a hormone responsible for increasing bone and muscle mass as well as stimulating aggressive behavior. Now where is the last place you would expect to find a large number of men suffering from a serious testosterone deficiency? If you said “inside the Octagon”, you’re wrong. The answer is Lilith Fair–low testosterone or not, no man wants to listen to that garbage. But competing in an MMA fight is a close second, so don’t feel bad about your answer. We’re hardly authorities on the matter, so check out what the very knowledgeable Dr. Johnny Benjamin has to say on the issue. And when even Nate Marquardt’s coach thinks the therapy has no place in the sport, you’ve got to know that something’s up.

RwilsonR asks: If any athlete from any other sport, from any generation, could cross over succesfully to MMA, who would it be and why? Is it this man?

Bo Jackson was certainly one hell of an athlete in his prime. As was Herschel Walker who, in case you forgot, has had success in this sport. Really, there are plenty of exceptional athletes who may have been MMA fighters today if the sport had been around when they were first getting into sports (and even at least one college football coach).

But we’re going to take the easy route and pick someone who actually competed in combat sports before MMA was around. Given the trend of dominant wrestlers finding success in MMA, we imagine that any of your great wrestlers from yesteryear would have had successful MMA careers if the sport was around while they were in their prime. Specifically, we’ll go with Sports Illustrated’s pick for the greatest athlete to ever hail from Iowa, Dan Gable.

Dan Gable was an absolute wrecking ball in his prime, having lost only one match in his entire collegiate career (his last match, against Washington’s Larry Owings). Of course, that was just his opening act: He would go on to win a gold medal at the 1972 Olympic Games while not giving up a single point. So yeah, we imagine he would have wrestlefucked his way to a hell of a career in MMA, if it was an option for him.

One final thing worth mentioning: After retiring from competition in 1975, Dan Gable decided he wasn’t done dominating college wrestling, so he became the head coach at the University of Iowa. During his tenure from 1976–1997, Iowa won 15 NCAA team titles, including a record nine straight titles from 1978 to 1986 and 21 straight Big Ten titles. Had MMA been around, we imagine that he’d start a gym that would rival any of the top gyms today.

That’s all for now, folks. Tune in next week as we answer even more of your (hopefully at least kind of) MMA related questions. You know the drill: You can send us questions through our Facebook page. You can tweet them to our Twitter account, as well as hashtag questions with #AskThePotato. You can register for our forums and post your questions there. Or you can just post them in the comments section of this article. And we still check that Google+ page we set up. Not that we want questions from that thing, we just feel like bragging.

M-1 Challenge 30 Recap: Enomoto wins Welterweight Title, Damkovsky crushes Figueroa

Zavurov vs Enomoto, part one. All videos props to IronForgesIron.com

When we last checked in on M-1 Global, Jeff Monson was busy being the anti-Bones before his loss to Fedor, Aleksander Emelianenko got flattened by Magomed Malikov and Maxim Grishin was caught rubbing his legs down with Bengay before a losing effort in his interim heavyweight championship bout with Kenny Garner. So basically, M-1 Global has been delivering plenty of insanity is what we’re getting at. Those of you who watched last night’s M-1 Challenge 30 in Costa Mesa, California expecting a freak show were likely disappointed, but those of you who expected a night of good fights got exactly that.

The evening’s main event saw welterweight champion Shamil Zavurov, who was forced out of a title defense against Rashid Magomedov at M-1 Challenge 28 by a last minute injury, defend his title against Swiss prospect Yasubey Enomoto. Earlier this year, Zavurov took home a unanimous decision over Enomoto after Yasubey Enomoto took the fight on eight days notice. This time around, Shamil Zavurov would not be so lucky.


Zavurov vs Enomoto, part one. All videos props to IronForgesIron.com

When we last checked in on M-1 Global, Jeff Monson was busy being the anti-Bones before his loss to Fedor, Aleksander Emelianenko got flattened by Magomed Malikov and Maxim Grishin was caught rubbing his legs down with Bengay before a losing effort in his interim heavyweight championship bout with Kenny Garner. So basically, M-1 Global has been delivering plenty of insanity is what we’re getting at. Those of you who watched last night’s M-1 Challenge 30 in Costa Mesa, California expecting a freak show were likely disappointed, but those of you who expected a night of good fights got exactly that.

The evening’s main event saw welterweight champion Shamil Zavurov, who was forced out of a title defense against Rashid Magomedov at M-1 Challenge 28 by a last minute injury, defend his title against Swiss prospect Yasubey Enomoto. Earlier this year, Zavurov took home a unanimous decision over Enomoto after Yasubey Enomoto took the fight on eight days notice. This time around, Shamil Zavurov would not be so lucky.

Shamil faded in the championship rounds, causing his takedown attempts to become more and more transparent. With one minute left in the final round, Zavurov shot for a takedown against Enomoto, and Enomoto countered the attempt with a fight-ending guillotine. Yasubey Enomoto improves to 9-3 with the victory, while the loss snaps a thirteen fight win streak for Shamil Zavurov.


Zavurov vs Enomoto, part two.

Also of note, Artiom Damkovsky redeemed himself after a second round TKO in March against Jose Figueroa with a first round knockout over Figueroa. Figueroa came out attempting a quick, sloppy takedown from across the ring. That kind of thing may work in the amateur circuit, but against Damkovsky? Not so much. Figueroa was unable to get Damkovsky to the ground before the knockout, and now falls to 10-6 in his career. Coincidentally, Artiom Damkovsky improves to 10-6 with the victory.


Artiom Damkovsky vs. Jose Figueroa

Results, via MMA Junkie:

MAIN CARD (Showtime)

Yasubey Enomoto def. Shamil Zavurov via submission (guillotine choke) – Round 5, 4:10
Artiom Damkovsky def. Jose Figueroa via KO (punches) – Round 1, 2:19
Alexander Sarnavskiy def. Sergio Cortez via submission (rear-naked choke) – Round 1, 1:46
Tyson Jeffries def. Eddie Arizmendi via submission (brabo choke) – Round 2, 2:08
Bao Quach def. Alvin Cacdac via submission (triangle armbar) – Round 1, 3:33

Armchair Matchmaker: TUF 14 Finale Edition


Tebowing: None of you are doing it right.

Another season of The Ultimate Fighter has come and gone, and we’re not certain what the future holds for it. The entire format of the show we knew and loved, then decided to ignore for a while, then were all like “Dude there’s no way Kimbo gets past Roy Nelson”, then went back to ignoring it when we were proven right, then decided “Well maybe Mayhem will be fun to watch” is about to change yet again. Raise your hand if you got lost during that last sentence.

If there’s one thing we understand at Cage Potato, it’s consistency. No matter how much the show changes, we’ll be around to give you our opinions on what to do with the finale’s biggest names. So let’s get to it, shall we?

Michael Bisping: Since losing to Wanderlei Silva back at UFC 110, Michael Bisping has gone 4-0 and established himself as a Top Ten Middleweight. Or at least that’s what I keep hearing, even though the guys he’s defeated in that time period have been on the lower to middle end of the middleweight division. In his post fight-interview with Ariel Helwani, Bisping hinted that his next fight has already been booked, and it’s against someone he hasn’t fought before. A fight against Alan Belcher makes sense, and should establish the winner as a legitimate contender in the middleweight division. Don’t act too surprised if the UFC uses Bisping as a litmus test for 7-0 (3-0 UFC) prospect Chris Weidman, either.


Tebowing: None of you are doing it right.

Another season of The Ultimate Fighter has come and gone, and we’re not certain what the future holds for it. The entire format of the show we knew and loved, then decided to ignore for a while, then were all like “Dude there’s no way Kimbo gets past Roy Nelson”, then went back to ignoring it when we were proven right, then decided “Well maybe Mayhem will be fun to watch” is about to change yet again. Raise your hand if you got lost during that last sentence.

If there’s one thing we understand at Cage Potato, it’s consistency. No matter how much the show changes, we’ll be around to give you our opinions on what to do with the finale’s biggest names. So let’s get to it, shall we?

Michael Bisping: Since losing to Wanderlei Silva back at UFC 110, Michael Bisping has gone 4-0 and established himself as a Top Ten Middleweight. Or at least that’s what I keep hearing, even though the guys he’s defeated in that time period have been on the lower to middle end of the middleweight division. In his post fight-interview with Ariel Helwani, Bisping hinted that his next fight has already been booked, and it’s against someone he hasn’t fought before. A fight against Alan Belcher makes sense, and should establish the winner as a legitimate contender in the middleweight division. Don’t act too surprised if the UFC uses Bisping as a litmus test for 7-0 (3-0 UFC) prospect Chris Weidman, either.     

Jason “Mayhem” Miller: Um, wow. That happened. Admittedly, we’ve seen much worse, but Miller’s wild striking and poor cardio won’t exactly silence his critics. Nor will they guarantee him a second fight in the UFC, as Dana White seems hesitant to give Mayhem another shot after last night’s performance. But for now, let’s assume that Miller will be given another chance. If that’s the case, Miller deserves a gatekeeper like Alessio Sakara in order to properly gage whether or not he belongs in the organization. Because we’re dealing with a marketable Strikeforce middleweight who fell flat in his UFC debut, my inner sadist won’t stop bringing up Cung Le as well. Regardless of the opponent, it’ll be crystal clear that it’s “go big or go back to Strikeforce” for Jason Miller.  

Diego Brandao: The TUF 14 Featherweight champion showed off a surprising ground game with his armbar victory over Dennis Bermudez. Or maybe it wasn’t surprising at all whatsoever, considering that the guy is a BJJ blackbelt. Regardless, we weren’t expecting him to win via submission. Because four of Brandao’s seven career losses have come via TKO, don’t expect the UFC to book him against a dangerous striker in his post-TUF debut. Rani Yahya, with zero victories by knockout, makes perfect sense.  

John Dodson: The TUF 14 bantamweight champion is in a pretty interesting situation. A natural flyweight, Dodson could- and probably will- stay on the sidelines until the UFC unveils its flyweight division in 2012. But let’s assume that he sticks around at bantamweight until given a specific date for when the UFC will start booking fights at flyweight. An experienced veteran like Jeff Curran or Cole Escovedo would be an interesting, winnable fight for Dodson. Especially Cole Escovedo, if we’re leaning towards “winnable”- as the UFC tends to with its TUF champions in their post-TUF debuts.

Tony Ferguson: Ferguson looked good in his victory against “Thug-jitsu” black belt Yves Edwards last night. Unfortunately for Ferguson, it’s going to take more than a good performance against a gatekeeper like Edwards to earn a contender at lightweight. Ferguson did well stuffing takedown attempts from Edwards, but matching him up against a wrestler like Shane Roller would be a good test for him. Likewise, the winner of the upcoming tilt between Jacob Volkmann and TJ Grant makes sense.

That’s all we have for now. You can decide the fates of the other winners and/or the losers not named “Jason Miller” from last night on your own. Choose wisely.

Knockout of the Day: Marius Zaromskis Channels his Inner Eddy Gordo against Bruno Carvalho

Props: MMAFighting.com

Fights taking place in North America just haven’t worked out for the cheesily-nicknamed Marius “The Whitemare” Zaromskis. Heading into last night’s “Rumble of the Kings”, the DREAM welterweight champion was 0-3 with one no contest on North American soil. Arguably just as bad, his politically incorrect nickname typically is replaced with the totally original “Raging Demon” moniker.

Unfortunately for Bruno Carvalho, last night’s “Rumble of the Kings” took place in Stockholm, Sweden.


Props: MMAFighting.com

Fights taking place in North America just haven’t worked out for the cheesily-nicknamed Marius “The Whitemare” Zaromskis. Heading into last night’s “Rumble of the Kings”, the DREAM welterweight champion was 0-3 with one no contest on North American soil. Arguably just as bad, his politically incorrect nickname typically is replaced with the totally original “Raging Demon” moniker.

Unfortunately for Bruno Carvalho, last night’s “Rumble of the Kings” took place in Stockholm, Sweden.

Zaromskis utilized a flawless Eddy Gordo impersonation on his way to a first round TKO over Bruno Carvalho. He improves to 16-6 with one no contest with the victory. Bruno, meanwhile, drops to 13-5.

Your move, Sensei Seagal.

Bellator 59 Recap: Dantas wins Bantamweight Tournament, Heavyweight Finale No Contest

Eric Prindle vs. Thiago Santos, fight ending low blow comes at the 2:07 mark. All videos in this post props to IronForgesIron.com

Coming fresh off of Last week’s action packed show, Bellator looked to keep building momentum last night in Atlantic City, New Jersey. The good news for Bellator is that, for the most part, the card delivered exciting, entertaining fights. The bad news for Bellator? That above video not only happened, but was supposed to be this season’s heavyweight tournament finale.

Rather, this season’s heavyweight tournament ends with a controversial no contest. On one hand, it would be anti-climatic to name a number one contender by disqualification from to an illegal kick. On the other hand, if Santos was aiming for the inside of Prindle’s thigh, it sure didn’t look like it. Prindle will meet Santos again to determine a contender for Cole Konrad, although a date for their next meeting hasn’t been announced yet.


Eric Prindle vs. Thiago Santos, fight ending low blow comes at the 2:07 mark. All videos in this post props to IronForgesIron.com

Coming fresh off of Last week’s action packed show, Bellator looked to keep building momentum last night in Atlantic City, New Jersey. The good news for Bellator is that, for the most part, the card delivered exciting, entertaining fights. The bad news for Bellator? That above video not only happened, but was supposed to be this season’s heavyweight tournament finale.

Rather, this season’s heavyweight tournament ends with a controversial no contest. On one hand, it would be anti-climatic to name a number one contender by disqualification from to an illegal kick. On the other hand, if Santos was aiming for the inside of Prindle’s thigh, it sure didn’t look like it. Prindle will meet Santos again to determine a contender for Cole Konrad, although a date for their next meeting hasn’t been announced yet.

Fortunately for Bellator, this season’s bantamweight tournament ended with a much more exciting, much less controversial fight. While Alexis Vila managed to push the pace and earn takedowns in the first round, twenty two year old Brazilian prospect Eduardo Dantas came back to take the unanimous decision victory. Dantas utilized his reach advantage to keep Vila at bay and threatened with numerous submission attempts in the second and third rounds. Dantas will meet bantamweight champion Zach Makovsky for a title shot next season.

Also of note, New Jersey native Kurt Pellegrino was knocked out in just fifty seconds by Patricky “Pitbull” Freire. Pellegrino got caught early, and appeared to be working for a takedown while the fight was called. The Atlantic City crowd began chanting bullshit, but after the fight, Kurt announced that he had lost “fair and square” and that this fight would be his last. At thirty two years old, coming off of a loss to a promising lightweight prospect, it’s hard not to believe Pellegrino when he says that he’s retiring for real this time. Thanks for the memories, Batman.

 

Full results, courtesy of MMA Junkie:

OFFICIAL MAIN CARD RESULTS

Eric Prindle vs. Thiago Santos declared a no contest (unintentional foul) – Round 1, 1:24  
Patricky “Pitbull” Freire def. Kurt Pellegrino via TKO (punches) – Round 1, 0:50
Eduardo Dantas def. Alexis Vila via unanimous decision (29-28 x3)
Marcin Held def. Phillipe Nover via split decision (29-28 x2, 28-29)

OFFICIAL PRELIMINARY CARD RESULTS

Karl Amoussou def. Jesus Martinez via TKO (strikes) – Round 1, 2:20
LeVon Maynard def. Chris Wing via unanimous decision (30-27 x2, 30-26)
Lucas Pimenta def. Doug Gordon via knockout (elbows) – Round 1, 0:40
Scott Heckman def. Brylan Van Artsdalen via submission (standing guillotine choke) – Round 1, 1:38
Gregory Milliard def. Brandon Saling via unanimous decision (30-27 x3)

Ask the Potato: The Best Fight Never Made, The Biggest Letdown and More


We’d tell you how we can do this to that poor girl, but it’s already been asked.

We’re back with yet another installment of Ask the Potato. You know the drill by now. You ask us somewhat serious questions. We give you bitter, sarcastic responses. Those Black Friday discounts we got yesterday have us feeling pretty stoked, so we’re not going to be nearly as facetious as usual. Sarcasm? Only one way to find out…

RSparrow asks: Who’s the black guy that’s always at the weigh ins? Like some kinda hype man, wtf?


We’d tell you how we can do this to that poor girl, but it’s already been asked.

We’re back with yet another installment of Ask the Potato. You know the drill by now. You ask us somewhat serious questions. We give you bitter, sarcastic responses. Those Black Friday discounts we got yesterday have us feeling pretty stoked, so we’re not going to be nearly as facetious as usual. Sarcasm? Only one way to find out…

RSparrow asks: Who’s the black guy that’s always at the weigh ins? Like some kinda hype man, wtf?

That’s a pretty vague question, RSparrow. You could be referring to just about anybody. We’ll go out on a limb here and assume you’re talking about Burt Watson. If you’re unfamiliar with UFC’s “babysitter to the stars”, do yourself a favor and check out Ariel Helwani’s in depth interview:

RwilsonR asks: What is the best fight that was never made? 
 
It depends on what you mean by “best”. Do you mean what duo would have produced the most exciting scrap? Do you mean the fight that would have mattered most in the rankings? Or do you mean what fight would have meant the most to the overall landscape of the sport? There are plenty of correct answers to your query, but we’ll start the conversation with two: 
 
Three years after his departure from the UFC, Royce Gracie signed to put undefeated record to the test at Pride 2 against the Mark Kerr. “The Smashing Machine” had yet to taste defeat and was in his prime, and a pairing against the sport’s first hero would have been a blockbuster. Weeks away from the clash, Royce would pull out of the fight citing back issues.  A win for Royce would have further cemented his legacy in the sport and quelled talk of him departing when tougher competition emerged. A victory for the hulking Kerr would have served as a true passing of the torch moment in MMA.

When Affliction tossed their gaudy, skull-clad hat in the promoters ring, they used their foothold as sponsors to secure the best free agents available. Though they signed several respectable Octagon outcasts, their crowned jewel was undoubtedly Fedor Emelianenko. In late 2007 Randy Couture broke free from the UFC in a heated dispute, and a dream match-up with Fedor teetered on the brink of reality. Serious talk of the bout began and commercials were even shot before the UFC filed an injunction to silence that noise. It was then that the words “champions clause” first entered into our vocabulary. The bout would have been a coup for Affliction, who hosted two financially crippling events before folding up shop on the heels of a busted Fedor-Barnett headliner, which for that reason alone could qualify as an answer to your question.

KarmaAteMyCat asks: Hector Lombard or Anderson Silva? What have you Potato…

Look, we hate to be like that NFL fan who boldly predicts that the Packers will win every week. Even that guy’s mom hates that guy. But sometimes that jackass makes a good point. What we’re getting at is this: Until Anderson Silva loses, we’re going to keep predicting that he wins. 
 
RwilsonR asks (again): Which fighter is the biggest letdown in MMA history? Is it Paulo Filho?

Call us crazy, but no- It isn’t Paulo Filho. Sure, he’s now famous for having stupid tattoos, (allegedly) doing a lot of Roofies and pulling out of fights. But back in his WEC days, he was a legitimate top five middleweight who many were saying could beat Anderson Silva. Even though those days are in the rear-view mirror, he can’t be the biggest letdown to us because he actually did live up to the hype surrounding him at one point in time.

Rather, our pick is Satoshi Ishii. Remember when the decorated judoka was one of the hottest free agents in MMA, despite never having competed? Well, Ishii has parlayed that into a decision loss to forty year old Hidehiko Yoshida, getting disqualified from an exhibition bout, “notable” victories over Minowaman and Jerome Le Banner and a draw to the aforementioned Paulo Filho. He’s now rumored to be Fedor’s opponent for his (somewhat annual) New Year’s Eve freakshow fight. Definitely not the career trajectory we were predicting for Ishii.  

@UFC4 asks (via Twitter):  Wait, Dan Miller‘s kid needs a kidney transplant and @danawhite or @lorenzofertitta aren’t paying for it?

We’re actually a little surprised by this too. We don’t mean that in a “I can’t believe that selfish prick isn’t going to pay for this!” kind of way; we mean it in a “Dana’s actually proven to be rather generous in these situations before” kind of way. We’re the first ones to point when Dana’s horns poke out of that beautiful bald head, but he’s been known to cover them up with a white hat on multiple occassions. Not long ago, he ponied up to help a young girl get life saving surgery. He didn’t send out a press release to toot his own horn, either. He just did it. The truth is, we’re just guessing that he hasn’t already contributed. Dan says that someone already made an incredible $20,000 donation. Were not saying it came from Dana, but we can’t rule out him stepping up to the plate either.

The more important question, readers, is have YOU donated yet?

That’s all for now, folks. Tune in next week as we answer even more of your (hopefully at least kind of) MMA related questions. You know the drill: You can send us questions through our Facebook page. You can tweet them to our Twitter account, as well as hashtag questions with #AskThePotato. You can register for our forums and post your questions there. Or you can just post them in the comments section of this article. Hopefully, you haven’t been asking us questions on that Google+ page we set up, because we still haven’t figured that thing out.