(Don Frye is holding a revolver. Your argument is invalid.)
These days, Don Frye is less an MMA fighter, more a philosophizer on facial hair, poontang, and the keys to being an alpha male in every given situation that life presents. Don’t get us wrong, Frye will still lay the boots to any hooley-hoo punk-ass jabroni who’s asking for it at the drop of a hat, but thanks to our recent “Ask Don” mailbag column, we’ve been lucky enough to set Frye’s legendary MMA status aside and simply pry into his mind in the hopes that maybe some of it will rub off on our measly, pathetic lives. So check out his latest dose of sagacity below, make sure to leave your own questions in the comments section, and then visit DonFrye.com to buy some stuff that will instantly skyrocket your popularity with the ladies.
bgoldstein asks: Don, I heard you were doing some stunt-work recently for a movie. Like, you weren’t in the movie, you were just stunt-manning for some other actor. The fuck is up with that?
I enjoy stunt work. I am paid extra by the theatrical community to do the stunt work instead of acting work. Due to my extraordinary talent, all would forget about Brando, Olivier, and DeNiro when I am performing dialogue and emotions in front of the camera. Can you imagine Don Frye performing emotions in front of the camera? (Ed note: No. No I can not.)
alank asks: If you were given the chance to kick the living shit out of anybody, living or dead, who would you pick and why?
It would be Satan because he has caused all the tribulations in my life.
MoirningwoodII asks: Don, where are the best strip clubs? Don’t reply Thailand, cuz it was probably a dude that danced for you.
Iowa because of the number of tits on a belly, you get more for your money (cows).
2DaDeath asks: Roy Nelson thinks winning is the only thing that matters and Dana White thinks you should take risks so that you’re remembered (more or less). Who’s right?
In PRIDE you were paid to first entertain the crowd and second to win the fight. Roy Nelson is correct due to the “dictorial bullying” of Dana White… that if you loose two fights you are fired. So Roy Nelson is correct by default of the King’s Declaration.
crappieflopper asks: Mr. Frye, How do I convince my wife’s two sisters to have a three way with me? Please note, I am unable to grow an epic stash, or I would ask for advice on a four way with me, the wife, and her two sisters. Thank you.
Without the stash, you have no chance so just let it go and stay under the covers with your magazines.
Loki asks: My buddy Stephen ordered a shirt from you some time back and at the time you were out of stock, you called him personally to appologize and explain that your wife ran the site and didnt have all the kinks worked out yet: “Stephen. Hey there partner this is Don Frye…Its uh…7 o’clock…my time. etc.” That was pretty cool of you. My question is; were you drunk at the time? Because you sounded pretty drunk.
Apparently your friend had his phone in his front pocket when he played the message for you and the proximity made you too dizzy to hear the message correctly.
fake joe silva asks: What are your thoughts on fighters using marijuana? Should it be allowed? Do you use it?
Yes it should be allowed. If it’s not tested for the welfare class, why should it be tested for the people who work for a living?