I’ve got a dilemma on my hands, Nation. I’m trying to think of the most hacky, Holland-esque series of puns to inform you that Bellator fighter Joe “The Doctor” Vedepo was arrested over the weekend for his eleventh alcohol-related offense, and I’m not sure which option to choose. Should it be Joe Vedepo Fills Iowa Officer’s Prescription for Head-Butts, or maybe something with more alliteration, like Buzzed Bellator Brawler Beats Bobby in Bloody Bar Battle? So many choices, but I think I’ll go with my original idea: “The Doctor” Is In, And He’s F*cking Sh*tfaced.
I should’ve gone with the second one. Aaaaaanyway, former UFC fighter turned Bellator fighter Joe “The Doctor” Vedepo has something you might call “an alcohol problem”, in that he’s been “arrested” “ten times” for “public intoxication” in his native Iowa and been deemed a “habitual line-stepper offender of the state intoxication law.” This all culminated last weekend when Vedepo, likely drinking off the sorrows of his third round TKO loss to King Mo Lawal at Bellator 131, decided to get into a drunken brawl with police outside an Iowa bar that left one officer hospitalized. The Gazette reports:
According to Iowa City police criminal complaints, officers responded to the Sports Column at 2:22 p.m. Friday for a report of a man inside who refused to leave. Responding officers encountered Jody “Joe” Vedepo, 31, of Columbus Junction.
Police said Vedepo told officers he “knew his rights” and was going back into the bar. Vedepo resisted the officers and head butted one officer in the chest, sending him to the hospital with injuries to his back. Officers took Vedepo to the ground and attempted to handcuff him, but he rolled his body and kicked his legs. Officers deployed a Taser in an attempt to subdue Vedepo, but it was ineffective, police said.
Ah, Vedepo went with the old “I know my rights” defense. Classic mistake. Had Vedepo been watching the news lately instead of getting blackout drunk by 2 pm each day, he would know that police officers are well-aware that we “know our rights.” They know that, technically, they can’t frisk anyone they stop on the street, or arrest you for being black on a Tuesday. It’s just that they don’t care.
(*nails fadeaway three-pointer*)
Well, I’m pretty much out of jokes for this one. You got anything else for us, Gazette?
Vedepo had slow, slurred speech, was “very unsteady” on his feet and had difficulty speaking in complete sentences, police said. His post arrest breath test indicated he had a blood alcohol content of .241 percent or three times the legal limit to operate a vehicle in Iowa.
Vedepo was arrested and now faces one count of assault causing injury to a peace officer, an aggravated misdemeanor; two counts of assault on peace officers, a serious misdemeanor; and one count of public intoxication, a simple misdemeanor. He remains in custody on a $10,000 cash-only bond.
How to Tell That You Have a Drinking Problem, Pt. 1: Your blood alcohol percentage is a higher number than the f*cking time of day that you were arrested.
In response to the news of Vedepo’s arrest, Bellator President Scott Coker sent a text message to MMAJunkie stating that, “If everything is exactly what it says, we will be cutting him.”
If it weren’t for those taser burns, I’d say the fact that Vedepo was fired via text message must sting the most right about now.