Australia native Bec Hyatt, a strawweight competitor, amassed a 4-1 record in her homeland before being signed to compete in the all-women Invicta FC promotion.
Although she sports a 1-2 record in the promotion, Hyatt remains one of the more popular fighters.
It would seem as though Hyatt is enjoying the good life at the moment, but her story doesn’t come without struggle. The UG picked up on Hyatt’s story through the FACAA detailing her survival of extreme domestic abuse.
The story begins in typical fashion with Hyatt looking to change something in her life by venturing into kickboxing. It was through training that she would meet her future husband Dan Hyatt. Dan would go out of his way to help train Bec and the two eventually traded their gym relationship for a romantic one.
It’s here where the story begins to spiral out of control.
“Two months had passed (since they started dating) and I started seeing a side to Dan that I didn’t like,” Bec said. “He would lash out saying harsh things about Zake, saying he didn’t like the kid because he reminded him of Zake’s father. That’s when the arguments began.”
The arguing and relationship issues seemed to be on hold as Bec would find out she was pregnant with Dan’s child. As Bec explains though, the happiness wasn’t without malice.
Dan was happy and so was I, but now I see why Dan was happy. He had his power now. He owned me because no way would I leave him to be a single mum of two. He would remind me of that and tell me that no one would want me. He would tell me that I have ‘two kids to two different dads’ and I ‘should be thankful that he wants me’. He would say that I’m ‘used and abused’ and that I was ‘damaged goods’.
Bec added that what began with emotional torment would turn physical soon after.
“We would have arguments over Zake and he would shove me into walls, hold me down and smother me with pillows, he would spit on me and pour things like milk and tomato sauce on my head, this wasn’t the worst of it and there is so much more that I had to deal with,” Bec said.
Bec stated that Dan would sometimes breakdown in tears saying he didn’t want to do what he had done but she (Bec) had given him no other choice.
This feeling of remorse is typical in physically abusive relationships as explained by Steven Stosny of Psychology Today. Stosny is a former professor at the University of Maryland, has appeared on countless TV programs, and has held hundreds of workshops.
“Early in the abuse cycle, a violent outburst is followed by a honeymoon period of remorse, attention, affection, and generosity, but not genuine compassion,” he said (Psychology Today).
Stosny continues with his reasoning behind why emotional damage is worse than the physical harm.
The other factor that makes emotional abuse so devastating is the greater likelihood that victims will blame themselves. If someone hits you, it’s easier to see that he or she is the problem, but if the abuse is subtle – saying or implying that you’re ugly, a bad parent, stupid, incompetent, not worth attention, or that no one could love you – you are more likely to think it’s your problem.
And that’s exactly what happened.
“The worst thing was that I believed him,” Bec said. “It was my fault and I deserved to be hit and spat on, I thought that I couldn’t leave and that nobody would ever want me. He had me believing that I really was ‘used goods’.”
There’s much more to Hyatt’s story including her packing everything up and moving with Dan to Queensland after getting married. She details how the housemate they had struggled with the ongoing arguing and abuse and how she eventually found a way out of the relationship.
It’s truly a tragic story but Bec sees it as a way to warn others not to fall into the same pitfalls she encountered. Working with FACAA and continuing to step into the cage despite what has transpired will no doubt help her cause along with giving motivation to those who desperately need some.
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