Tag: excuses

Jessamyn Duke’s Fight Night 45 Loss Was Due to a Broken Hand, Not Getting KTFO, According to Shayna Baszler


(“Uh, Jessamyn, we’re gonna need you to stop with the hand gestures while we take this x-ray.”)

Fight Night 45 was one of the most violent non-Fight for the Troops cards in UFC History, featuring an astounding nine finishes, 8 TKOs, and a six fight main card that not once required a judge’s input. My decision to spend most of the night ranting about Microsoft tech support notwithstanding, I thoroughly enjoyed what the card had to offer, from the prelim fights all the way up to the main event, which saw Donald Cerrone finish the damn-near unfinishable Jim Miller *twice* in their two round banger.

In one of those aforementioned prelim fights, Leslie Smith destroyed Ronda Rousey training partner (as she was introduced by Jon Anik) Jessamyn Duke in the first round, finishing her with a flurry of body shots, kicks, and knees that was Liddell vs. Ortiz-esque in terms of its volume. But it was only matter of time before the excuses started flying, and luckily, Duke’s training partner, Shayna Baszler, is here to jump on that grenade.

“For everyone asking, @jessamynduke broke her hand. Didn’t know what to do once Leslie turned it on when she couldn’t grab and circle off,” Baszler posted on Twitter shortly after the fight.

While I would disagree that Duke’s inability to circle off was less the cause of her demise than her inability to use her massive reach advantage to her…uh…advantage, the above photo posted to Duke’s instagram seems to indicate that her hand was indeed broken to shit. You can check out a few other photos of Duke’s hand over at the UG, but really, this comment by UG’er rrefs sums up Duke/Baszler’s excuse perfectly…


(“Uh, Jessamyn, we’re gonna need you to stop with the hand gestures while we take this x-ray.”)

Fight Night 45 was one of the most violent non-Fight for the Troops cards in UFC History, featuring an astounding nine finishes, 8 TKOs, and a six fight main card that not once required a judge’s input. My decision to spend most of the night ranting about Microsoft tech support notwithstanding, I thoroughly enjoyed what the card had to offer, from the prelim fights all the way up to the main event, which saw Donald Cerrone finish the damn-near unfinishable Jim Miller *twice* in their two round banger.

In one of those aforementioned prelim fights, Leslie Smith destroyed Ronda Rousey training partner (as she was introduced by Jon Anik) Jessamyn Duke in the first round, finishing her with a flurry of body shots, kicks, and knees that was Liddell vs. Ortiz-esque in terms of its volume. But it was only matter of time before the excuses started flying, and luckily, Duke’s training partner, Shayna Baszler, is here to jump on that grenade.

“For everyone asking, @jessamynduke broke her hand. Didn’t know what to do once Leslie turned it on when she couldn’t grab and circle off,” Baszler posted on Twitter shortly after the fight.

While I would disagree that Duke’s inability to circle off was less the cause of her demise than her inability to use her massive reach advantage to her…uh…advantage, the above photo posted to Duke’s instagram seems to indicate that her hand was indeed broken to shit. You can check out a few other photos of Duke’s hand over at the UG, but really, this comment by UG’er rrefs sums up Duke/Baszler’s excuse perfectly…

Classic reference, rrefs. Bravo.

In other Fight Night 45 medical news, Jim Miller caught an indefinite suspension pending an x-ray on his right forearm and stomach following his loss to Cowboy Cerrone. Joe Proctor, on the other hand, got off easy with a 30 day suspension despite the fact that he apparently had a golf ball lodged into the side of his cranium midway through his eventual TKO win over Justin Salas.

The rest of the Fight Night 45 medical suspension are below, via MMAWeekly.

-Evan Dunham was suspended for 30 days with no contact for a TKO loss.

-Justin Salas was suspended for 30 days with no contact for TKO loss and for facial laceration healing.

-Alptekin Ozkilic was suspended for 30 days with no contact for TKO loss. He was also suspended indefinitely pending the results of a CT head scan.

-Alex White was suspended for 45 days for right eye laceration healing, as well as 30 days with no contact for a knockout loss. He was also suspended indefinitely pending the results of a CT head scan and neurological examination.

-Hugo Viana was suspended for 30 days with no contact for a TKO loss.

-Tina Lahdemaki was suspended for 60 days with no contact for recovery. She was also suspended indefinitely pending opthalmological clearance of her right eye.

One final note: Chris Lytle joined the FS1 team earlier this week, and his first night of fight-calling featured more body shots and all out wars than any card in recent memory. Coincidence? No, no it is not.

–J. Jones

Chael Sonnen Attempts to Explain Failed Drug Test Via Last-Second Interview With ‘Jay Mohr Sports’


(“Thank God there aren’t random drug tests in @EASPORTSUFC” — former CP writer Jason Moles dropping truth bombs.)

Just moments ago, word was handed down that Chael Sonnen had failed a random drug test administered last month (you know, the same one that he verbally executed Wanderlei Silva for skipping out on), and had been pulled from his UFC 175 fight against Vitor Belfort as a result. Being the master of spin-control that Sonnen is, The American Gangster attempted to get out in front of the story by appearing on comedian Jay Mohr’s sports radio show and explaining himself before the ESPN story broke. Attempted being the point of emphasis here.

Instead, Sonnen partook in a rushed interview that not only failed to beat the ESPN story out of the gate, but left as many questions as it answered. Mohr also chimed in at one point that Sonnen should use the next 30 days before his hearing to get “loaded up on steroids,” so there’s that to look forward to as well.

Sonnen’s statement, along with a full transcription (via MMAFighting) is after the jump. 


(“Thank God there aren’t random drug tests in @EASPORTSUFC” — former CP writer Jason Moles dropping truth bombs.)

Just moments ago, word was handed down that Chael Sonnen had failed a random drug test administered last month (you know, the same one that he verbally executed Wanderlei Silva for skipping out on), and had been pulled from his UFC 175 fight against Vitor Belfort as a result. Being the master of spin-control that Sonnen is, The American Gangster attempted to get out in front of the story by appearing on comedian Jay Mohr’s sports radio show and explaining himself before the ESPN story broke. Attempted being the point of emphasis here.

Instead, Sonnen partook in a rushed interview that not only failed to beat the ESPN story out of the gate, but left as many questions as it answered. Mohr also chimed in at one point that Sonnen should use the next 30 days before his hearing to get “loaded up on steroids,” so there’s that to look forward to as well.

Sonnen’s statement, along with a full transcription (via MMAFighting) is after the jump. 

They changed the ruling in Nevada. Earlier this year they did away with what’s known as TRT — Testosterone Replacement Therapy — in Nevada, and I was on that. So when they changed the rule, we all had to go through a transition phase. For me, for the transition, I had to take a couple of things: one is called clomiphene and the other is called HCG (human chorionic gonadotropin). So this is what we did. And I took my boards out of the water in the meantime, meaning I didn’t fight, I didn’t ask for a license. You had to wait to cross this bridge, if you will.

In the interim, they did a test. I tested positive for these things, which I should have. I took them. They were in my system. That wasn’t a surprise. These aren’t anabolics, these aren’t steroids, these aren’t performance-enhancers. None of that stuff. But they have deemed that they are banned substances.

What’s interesting, in my case, we’re out of competition. These are not things that I showed up with on gameday. This is out of competition due to a rule that they changed. So this is kind of an odd spot for me.

What happens is they do out-of-competition testing, and the lab that they went to is the USADA [United States Anti-Doping Agency] lab. Now the USADA lab is the greatest lab in the world. It’s a very sensitive test. We had done our own tests, at our own labs, and we thought that everything was out of the system. These were not secrets that I took this stuff. This is what you have to take when you’re coming off testosterone. But any rate, it was picked up on their test. Now they can handle that however they want. They can look at that and go, Yeah, this makes sense to us, or they can say, You know what? We don’t like this. And they can do either one. They’re the commission. I just got to be a reactor and live with it. The confusing part is for a non-anabolic, non-steroid, non-performance enhancing agent that is perfectly legal that I need for a healthy life, essentially they’re saying you gotta choose between health and sport.

It’s very tough for me too because I did a number of interviews talking about what I’ve done, whether it’s on UFC Tonight, Canada, UK, Brazil … I couldn’t have told any more people. So when this came back they said, Why did this come back in your system? I said, Why did it come back in my system? Because I took it. I’ve been taking it. I had to take it because you guys changed the rules. So I did feel a little bit frustrated in that regard. And they may listen to me, they may agree with me, but the way this works is I now have to go to a hearing. And that hearing gets kicked down the road who knows how many days. I have a fight in 30 days, there’s no way the hearing will be before then.

There is a little bit of a confusion on the rules. It’s kind of tough where you’re like, Oh, really? This is a banned substance? Where do we find that? Who exactly do we go to for clarity on this? And the commission has always been very clear. Whether it’s the Nevada Commission, and now there is a new guy at the helm [Bob Bennett], but the old executive director [Keith Kizer], I’ve got quotes I downloaded right off the Internet, but he has been very clear that there is a clear distinctions between gameday and out-of-competition testing. Now you could never take an anabolic or anything, I understand that. This is not an anabolic. This is not a steroid. These are just the substances I had to go to transition, who’s also having — this is a very private part of my life I wasn’t planning to share with anybody — but I’m having fertility issues.

The next scheduled meeting of the NSAC is scheduled for June 17th, where Vitor Belfort will also have his hearing for his failed drug test back in February. It has yet to be confirmed whether or not Sonnen’s hearing will go down on the same date.

Sonnen is set to appear on FOX Sports at any moment to further explain his failed test, so we will have more on this story as it develops. In the meantime, I’m just going to go lay my head down and think of how hilarious it would be if Jon Jones offered to step in and save UFC 175 by fighting Wanderlei Silva on a day’s notice.

–J. Jones

VIDEO: Wanderlei Silva Denies Fleeing From Drug Test, Still Thinks He’s Fighting at UFC 175

(Where’s your crazy heavy metal music and strobe-lights now, playboy? / Props: wandfightteam)

After Chael Sonnen accused Wanderlei Silva of literally running from an unannounced NSAC drug-test — which reportedly led to his removal from UFC 175 — Silva has released his side of the story in a new video released today. According to Silva, the whole thing is “all a big confusion.” Sadly, he doesn’t seem to realize that the fight with Sonnen has already been scrapped. Here’s his full statement:

“This is all a big confusion. Everything I’ve heard, I heard it just like you, from the Internet. Last Saturday, a guy showed up at my gym with several papers in English saying that I had to sign the papers. I asked him if all the documents were written in English and he said yes. He did not show me any identification. So I told him that I can’t read English very well and I would need my lawyer present to able to sign any documents. Then I had to leave since it was the day of Barao’s fight and I was very busy here in Vegas.

“In 20 years of career and 50 professional fights, I never refused to test or failed to apply for a license to fight. My fight will be in Las Vegas on July 5, so we were more than one month from the fight. And my plans were to do all of my obligations once I get back from Brazil since I’m going to Brazil for the TUF Brazil Finale. Once I am back in Las Vegas I will reach out to the NSAC to submit myself to any blood or urine test like I always have done. [Ed. note: Oh, so he wanted to do the drug test *after* he got back from Brazil? Makes perfect sense to me. Give this man his license!]


(Where’s your crazy heavy metal music and strobe-lights now, playboy? / Props: wandfightteam)

After Chael Sonnen accused Wanderlei Silva of literally running from an unannounced NSAC drug-test — which reportedly led to his removal from UFC 175 — Silva has released his side of the story in a new video released today. According to Silva, the whole thing is “all a big confusion.” Sadly, he doesn’t seem to realize that the fight with Sonnen has already been scrapped. Here’s his full statement:

“This is all a big confusion. Everything I’ve heard, I heard it just like you, from the Internet. Last Saturday, a guy showed up at my gym with several papers in English saying that I had to sign the papers. I asked him if all the documents were written in English and he said yes. He did not show me any identification. So I told him that I can’t read English very well and I would need my lawyer present to able to sign any documents. Then I had to leave since it was the day of Barao’s fight and I was very busy here in Vegas.

“In 20 years of career and 50 professional fights, I never refused to test or failed to apply for a license to fight. My fight will be in Las Vegas on July 5, so we were more than one month from the fight. And my plans were to do all of my obligations once I get back from Brazil since I’m going to Brazil for the TUF Brazil Finale. Once I am back in Las Vegas I will reach out to the NSAC to submit myself to any blood or urine test like I always have done. [Ed. note: Oh, so he wanted to do the drug test *after* he got back from Brazil? Makes perfect sense to me. Give this man his license!]

“If this fight doesn’t happen it will be very difficult for me. I have invested all my time and I’ve gone through a lot to make this fight happen. I’ve had to deal with a lot of pressure, and I went through a lot on TUF Brazil 3. And I’ve been putting all my strength and effort into my training camp. I’m training harder than I’ve ever trained in my life.

“This is the fight I wanted the most in my entire life. And I will do everything I can to make this fight happen. All this will get resolved, and I will be there on July 5 to put on a great show for all of you my friends. I will show our strength and willpower and I will achieve one more victory for us. From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all my supporters.”

Despite Wandy’s wishful thinking, he has definitely been removed from UFC 175, although reports of him being fired from the promotion are inaccurate. Chael Sonnen will remain on the July 5th card against Vitor Belfort, and the fight is back to being at middleweight, apparently.

Jon Jones Changes Story About Homophobic ‘Hacked Phone’ Incident


(Suddenly, the “Bones Knows” cell phone case has become the greatest MMA gag-gift of the year. Buy it here on eBay.)

Last week, Jon Jones lost his phone, a mysterious homophobic hacker found it, and then proceeded to fire gay slurs at a Swedish teenager on Instagram under Jones’s identity. At least, that’s the story Jones and his manager Malki Kawa tried to feed us. It seemed fishy from the beginning, and it probably doesn’t help that Jones has now decided to edit his story a little bit.

As Jones claims in a new interview with Newsday‘s Mark LaMonica, a member of Jones’s social media team sent the messages from his account, possibly unwittingly, and this all happened while Jones was in fact trying to get a new phone, because he lost his old one, though that had nothing to do with the alleged “hack.” Got it? From the Newsday article:

Jones said he was at the store that day getting a new phone, and Kawa couldn’t reach him. Kawa said that when he finally did get through to Jones, he asked Jones if he wrote the offensive comments. Jones had no idea what Kawa was even talking about, he said. Kawa then sent Jones screengrabs of what had been posted to his Instagram account…


(Suddenly, the “Bones Knows” cell phone case has become the greatest MMA gag-gift of the year. Buy it here on eBay.)

Last week, Jon Jones lost his phone, a mysterious homophobic hacker found it, and then proceeded to fire gay slurs at a Swedish teenager on Instagram under Jones’s identity. At least, that’s the story Jones and his manager Malki Kawa tried to feed us. It seemed fishy from the beginning, and it probably doesn’t help that Jones has now decided to edit his story a little bit.

As Jones claims in a new interview with Newsday‘s Mark LaMonica, a member of Jones’s social media team sent the messages from his account, possibly unwittingly, and this all happened while Jones was in fact trying to get a new phone, because he lost his old one, though that had nothing to do with the alleged “hack.” Got it? From the Newsday article:

Jones said he was at the store that day getting a new phone, and Kawa couldn’t reach him. Kawa said that when he finally did get through to Jones, he asked Jones if he wrote the offensive comments. Jones had no idea what Kawa was even talking about, he said. Kawa then sent Jones screengrabs of what had been posted to his Instagram account.

Jones said the comments came from someone who worked for the company he works with to enhance his presence in social media. It is the same company, Jones said, that helped get more than 1 million likes to his Facebook page.

“One of the guys that’s working for us took it into his own hands to reply to the fans some negative stuff,” Jones said. “I don’t know if the dude thought he was logged in under his name or if he knew he was logged in under my name. By the time I found out all that stuff had happened, it had been on the Internet for hours.”

Jones said that person no longer works on his social media team and that he has changed all his passwords.

Social media is tricky when you’re a celebrity. On one hand, outsourcing your tweeting and instagramming to a private firm makes sense, because who has time for that shit? (We already knew that Georges St-Pierre “never tweet once in my life.”) On the other hand, rogue social media managers have so much power to destroy their clients’ reputations that it doesn’t seem worth it. Going forward, it might be best for people like Jon Jones to, you know, not hire other folks to speak for them in the first place.

Anyway, “my social media guy did it and he’s been fired” is the new “my phone got hacked.” You buying this?

Either Jon Jones’s Phone Was Stolen, Or He Went Full Homophobe on Instagram Last Night


(Props: BloodyElbow)

UFC light-heavyweight champion Jon Jones caused quite a stir on social media last night when he apparently fired a barrage of homophobic slurs at a Swedish kid named Daniel Javid. After Javid dared to question Bones’s recent statement that he has more heart than Alexander Gustafsson, Jones — or somebody operating his account — went through Javid’s photos and left comments such as “Fag shit,” Fag boys,” and “Homosexuality is a sin.” Jones then posted a selfie as if nothing out-of-the-ordinary had happened.

The official explanation from Jones’s manager Malki Kawa is that his phone was stolen, and someone else was posting those comments without his knowledge. (Don’t worry, Jones already got a new phone.) Whether or not you believe that excuse probably reflects how you feel about Jon Jones in the first place. Do you believe that Jones is openly homophobic and lacks the self-control to keep his opinions to himself? Anecdotes like this certainly don’t help his case. Or, do you believe Kawa’s story, because it would be insane for a UFC superstar to go off like this in public? I’m inclined to lean towards the latter, but who knows?

We’ll update you if and when the UFC releases a statement about this incident.


(Props: BloodyElbow)

UFC light-heavyweight champion Jon Jones caused quite a stir on social media last night when he apparently fired a barrage of homophobic slurs at a Swedish kid named Daniel Javid. After Javid dared to question Bones’s recent statement that he has more heart than Alexander Gustafsson, Jones — or somebody operating his account — went through Javid’s photos and left comments such as “Fag shit,” Fag boys,” and “Homosexuality is a sin.” Jones then posted a selfie as if nothing out-of-the-ordinary had happened.

The official explanation from Jones’s manager Malki Kawa is that his phone was stolen, and someone else was posting those comments without his knowledge. (Don’t worry, Jones already got a new phone.) Whether or not you believe that excuse probably reflects how you feel about Jon Jones in the first place. Do you believe that Jones is openly homophobic and lacks the self-control to keep his opinions to himself? Anecdotes like this certainly don’t help his case. Or, do you believe Kawa’s story, because it would be insane for a UFC superstar to go off like this in public? I’m inclined to lean towards the latter, but who knows?

We’ll update you if and when the UFC releases a statement about this incident.

Dennis Siver Blames Failed UFC 168 Drug Test on New Nutritionist and Diet “Used by the Stars”


(Well shit, if it worked before he shot Skyfall…)

As a longtime fan of German spin-kicker/liver-destroyer Dennis Siver, I was more upset than most to learn that he had failed his UFC 168 drug test for a testicle-preserving banned substance often used in post-steroid cycles. Shocked no, because just look at the dude, but upset nonetheless. And being that we are currently living in the era of shirked responsibility, Siver has now come forth to place the blame on his nutritionist, while simultaneously claiming that his positive test is no one’s fault but his own.

Siver spoke with German publication GroundandPound, and although his excuse may not be on the level of Vinicius Queiroz’s “the sauna gave me steroids,” it is interesting to say the least:

Today I would like to issue a public statement and give my fans and supporters the opportunity to form their own opinion on how the alleged doping allegations against me came about.

Last fall, my coach Niko Sulenta was diagnosed with severe cancer, which lead to me being on my own during the preparations for a UFC fight for the first time, without me being able to draw on his longstanding care and advice. Niko has always been essential to my weight reduction.

So prior to UFC 168 I had to hire an external personal trainer and nutritionist to support me with making weight. The nutritionist recommended me a new diet method from the US, which had been successfully used by the stars.


(Well shit, if it worked before he shot Skyfall…)

As a longtime fan of German spin-kicker/liver-destroyer Dennis Siver, I was more upset than most to learn that he had failed his UFC 168 drug test for a testicle-preserving banned substance often used in post-steroid cycles. Shocked no, because just look at the dude, but upset nonetheless. And being that we are currently living in the era of shirked responsibility, Siver has now come forth to place the blame on his nutritionist, while simultaneously claiming that his positive test is no one’s fault but his own.

Siver spoke with German publication GroundandPound, and although his excuse may not be on the level of Vinicius Queiroz’s “the sauna gave me steroids,“ it is interesting to say the least:

Today I would like to issue a public statement and give my fans and supporters the opportunity to form their own opinion on how the alleged doping allegations against me came about.

Last fall, my coach Niko Sulenta was diagnosed with severe cancer, which lead to me being on my own during the preparations for a UFC fight for the first time, without me being able to draw on his longstanding care and advice. Niko has always been essential to my weight reduction.

So prior to UFC 168 I had to hire an external personal trainer and nutritionist to support me with making weight. The nutritionist recommended me a new diet method from the US, which had been successfully used by the stars.

Thereupon I asked, if I, as a competitive professional athlete, could safely use this supplement. This was confirmed to me. Then I committed the fatal mistake of not making sure through the UFC if individual substances from the supplement could have effects on the drug tests.

I flew to the US and won my fight. I was all the more shocked when the result of the A sample was deemed ’inconclusive’ and I was hoping for the result of the B sample. They found a small component of hCG in my urine sample – a minor ingredient of the diet preparation and a substance which is banned in the UFC.

I do not want to blame anyone for this result and I take full responsibility for my gullible and careless behavior. It was my mistake and it was grossly negligent. But I distance myself from any kind of doping. In my previous sixteen UFC fights, not even the smallest banned substance has been detected. This makes the current events all the more disappointing and shocking for me and my team.

Actual email I received from BG about this story:

“The nutritionist recommended me a new diet method from the US, which had been successfully used by the stars.”

In a related story, Jennifer Lawrence has been checked into a hospital for swollen testicles.

In all seriousness, I almost want to give Siver the benefit of the doubt here. Yes, the man has a physique that is…suspicious, but he’s put in some 17 fights in the UFC — dating all the way back to 2007 — without incident up to this point. His story seems reasonable — a classic tale of a fighter placing too much faith in his physician ala Antonio Silva (poor example) or Ben Rothwell – and while I would personally make sure to double, triple, and quadruple-check every substance I was putting into my body if my paycheck/employment depended on it*, I also don’t have my logical-thinking skills dimmed by a daily input of punches, kicks, and knees**.

An airtight argument, I know, and one that is definitely not biased by my appreciation for the fantastic fights Siver has put on over the years (his UFC 122 scrap with Andre Winner is a personal favorite of mine). But in the hope that his healthy, steroid-free balls may one day produce another spin-kicking, liver-destroying, Daniel-Craig-looking UFC star, I must believe him.

*Thankfully, CP has yet to actually locate my secret lair and make this hellish nightmare a reality. 

**The irony being that I’m 75% sure I received a concussion in a mosh pit last night. Never saw that 13-year old girl coming, man. 

–J. Jones