(The first self-induced double KO since Hamill vs. Munoz, everybody. Gif courtesy of @ZProphet_MMA.)
While attending a charity boxing event yesterday — the cleverly dubbed “Haymakers for Hope” — my roommate and I got into a discussion about what ethnic and geographic backgrounds could be combined to make the “perfect” boxer, or MMA fighter for that matter. It was basically a hypothetical game of Racist Transformers, but is it really racist if it’s both hypothetical and rooted in positive stereotypes? I digress.
In any case, we both agreed that a Russian component would have to be in the mix somehow. While my roommate argued that a Russian-born Irishman raised in Brazil would make for a true “Ultimate Fighter” (which, considering what the average trip to the gas station can be like down there, is a sound choice), I believed a Brazilian-born Samoan raised in the desolate, hopeless tundras of Mother Russia would surely become the undefeatable killing machine prophesied in the before times. “All Russians know is despair,” I said. “And that makes them stronger.”
Last night’s ProFC 50 bout between Boris Miroshnichenko and Herman Yakubov both confirmed and denied my suspicions about the Russian people. While Yakubov, a Russian, was KO’d in the first round by his Belarusian counterpart, he also made sure to knock himself out again with his own knee on the way down, lawn chair style, and a third time when his head hit the canvas — as if to say, “Although you have damaged me, comrade, know that your damage holds not a candle to those wrought by my own devices. For what is life but the prolonging of inevitable death? And what is death, if not a face at peace…”
(The first self-induced double KO since Hamill vs. Munoz, everybody. Gif courtesy of @ZProphet_MMA.)
While attending a charity boxing event yesterday — the cleverly dubbed “Haymakers for Hope” — my roommate and I got into a discussion about what ethnic and geographic backgrounds could be combined to make the “perfect” boxer, or MMA fighter for that matter. It was basically a hypothetical game of Racist Transformers, but is it really racist if it’s both hypothetical and rooted in positive stereotypes? I digress.
In any case, we both agreed that a Russian component would have to be in the mix somehow. While my roommate argued that a Russian-born Irishman raised in Brazil would make for a true “Ultimate Fighter” (which, considering what the average trip to the gas station can be like down there, is a sound choice), I believed a Brazilian-born Samoan raised in the desolate, hopeless tundras of Mother Russia would surely become the undefeatable killing machine prophesied in the before times. “All Russians know is despair,” I said. “And that makes them stronger.”
Last night’s ProFC 50 bout between Boris Miroshnichenko and Herman Yakubov both confirmed and denied my suspicions about the Russian people. While Yakubov, a Russian, was KO’d in the first round by his Belarusian counterpart, he also made sure to knock himself out again with his own knee on the way down, lawn chair style, and a third time when his head hit the canvas — as if to say, “Although you have damaged me, comrade, know that your damage holds not a candle to those wrought by my own devices. For what is life but the prolonging of inevitable death? And what is death, if not a face at peace…”
(As is usually the case with potato-filmed Brazilian fight videos, we recommend that you turn down your speakers before pressing play.)
We find it a bit sardonic that, just a day after we passed along Joe Rogan’s picks for the greatest head kick knockouts in UFC History, we received a video of what might be the slowest head kick knockout we have ever seen.
This six-second, first “punch” knockout comes to us courtesy of Thiago Xplode, who we are just going to assume is the alter ego of the Youtube user who uploaded this video last month, Thiago Fernandes. Similarly troubling is the fact that this fight supposedly took place at Parabellum Fight 2 in 2010, although neither “Xplode” nor his opponent/victim, Fabio Diniz, are listed on the event’s Sherdog page.
But none of that really matters. What matters is how this mysterious Thiago character was able to execute a completely telegraphed, half-speed head kick knockout with zero setup. Without sounding too much like a keyboard warrior, I will just say that in the time it took Thiago to deliver that kick, I was able to complete my Master’s thesis, “The Effect of Tachyon Destabilization on the Warp Core.”
(As is usually the case with potato-filmed Brazilian fight videos, we recommend that you turn down your speakers before pressing play.)
We find it a bit sardonic that, just a day after we passed along Joe Rogan’s picks for the greatest head kick knockouts in UFC History, we received a video of what might be the slowest head kick knockout we have ever seen.
This six-second, first “punch” knockout comes to us courtesy of Thiago Xplode, who we are just going to assume is the alter ego of the Youtube user who uploaded this video last month, Thiago Fernandes. Similarly troubling is the fact that this fight supposedly took place at Parabellum Fight 2 in 2010, although neither “Xplode” nor his opponent/victim, Fabio Diniz, are listed on the event’s Sherdog page.
But none of that really matters. What matters is how this mysterious Thiago character was able to execute a completely telegraphed, half-speed head kick knockout with zero setup. Without sounding too much like a keyboard warrior, I will just say that in the time it took Thiago to deliver that kick, I was able to complete my Master’s thesis, “The Effect of Tachyon Destabilization on the Warp Core.”
(Props: Adiga69)
Usually we only see knockouts this fast when one of the competitors fakes the glove tap or rushes in like an animal/moron. During a bout at last week’s Desert Force Championship 1 — the first MMA event held in Amman, Jo…
Usually we only see knockouts this fast when one of the competitors fakes the glove tap or rushes in like an animal/moron. During a bout at last week’s Desert Force Championship 1 — the first MMA event held in Amman, Jordan — the fighters come out normally, touch gloves, and then the knockout victim just kind of hangs out in concussion-range with his hands down. The sound of the impact is just ridiculous. Great show of respect from the winning fighter, who comes back to…kiss the loser’s ankle? Hmm. Well, it’s a different culture and we must not judge.
