By Jason Moles
After a spectacular night of fights at UFC 134 in Rio, we’re going to try to make sense of it with a little game called ‘Buy, Sell, or Hold’. I’ll take a fighter and either buy, sell, or hold him like a stockbroker would. (It’s kind of like the real stock market, except you won’t want to throw yourself off a building afterwards.) Take my advice and you’ll end up with a nice MMA portfolio. Without further ado…
Anderson Silva: Buy! Buy! Buy!
‘The Spider‘ has everything you’d want from a blue chip stock: an x-factor that makes people want to see him fight, major corporate sponsors, and hilarious commercials. Oh yeah, and his fighting isn’t that bad either. Silva’s complete and utter domination of Yushin Okami at UFC 134 just reinforces what we already knew — we are witnessing the greatest fighter of all time every time he steps inside the Octagon™.
Yushin Okami: Dump it like your autographed picture of Carrot Top.
He is currently ranked as the #3 best Middleweight and yet it seems all for naught. Okami showed up to a gunfight with a pair of flip-flops and a bag of Skittles against Silva. Despite working with the only man to dominate the champion, he never once came close to showing a spark in Brazil. I have a feeling he’ll face the same fate as Jon Fitch while his stock becomes more cursed than Monster.
Mauricio ‘Shogun’ Rua: Buy it like they’re giving it away for free.
The ‘Shogun’ Rua that showed up Saturday night is not the same man who fought and lost to Jon Jones earlier this year. He proved that he has completely recovered from his past knee surgeries, and destroyed a Top 10 light-heavyweight fighter without breaking a sweat. Rua will once again rise to the top — you can bank on that.
Forrest Griffin: Sell
The two-time New York Times bestselling author and former UFC Light-Heavyweight champion is an open book when it comes to his feelings about fighting overseas, training, and why he continues to fight. Likewise, I too shall be an open book about where to put your money in the MMA stock market, and it’s not here. In his last five fights, Griffin has won only twice against guys who peaked five to seven years prior. Liquidate whatever stock you have in the TUF 1 winner.
Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira: Sell*
At the ripe old age of 35, Big Nog did the unthinkable in knocking out a rising star in 28-year-old Brendan Schuab. Modern medicine, or maybe witchcraft, has given Nogueira an unforgettable night in front of his compatriots and you’ve gotta know he deserves it. Nevertheless, that in no way means you should buy Big Nog stock considering the likelihood that he’ll retire in the next few years and won’t be getting a crack at the title anytime soon.
*Note: If the UFC returns to Brazil in 2012, you’d be best served to make a Bed and Breakfast deal on this stock. Just be sure to dump once you think you’ve hit the tipping point.
Brendan Schaub: Hold
People have been a little high on the Hybrid. Sure, he’s promising, but his seemingly glass chin gives me pause. You won’t get rich on him, but you could definitely go broke on him. Let’s slow down on Schaub and watch it play out.
Edson Barboza: Buy
Buy this stock now and sell it early next year, right before the bubble pops. Like we mentioned here yesterday, Barboza barely got by a hand-picked opponent. Not convinced? Consider his fight against Anthony Njokuani at UFC 128 where he struggled to take home a decision win. Listen, you’re only as good as your last night and there will be a sucker that only remembers he beat a guy who won The Ultimate Fighter and will line your pockets with hundies.
Ross Pearson: Hold
There are too many talented fighters in the Lightweight division to buy more stock of the TUF 9 winner. Although he lost, he did look much better than he has in the past, so there’s no reason to sell what stock you already have. If the Brits didn’t have such a bad reputation for having a non-existent wrestling game, I may have bought some of this stock myself.
Luiz Cane: Sell
Winning just one of his last four fights — and that was against a guy who is no longer employed by Zuffa — Luiz Cane is a sinking ship. He is the only Brazilian to lose at UFC Rio, which will stick with him for years to come. He is now the answer to a trivia question. Get out while you still can and cut your losses.
Spencer Fisher: Sell, Sell, Sell
Jordan Breen said it best on Twitter last night: As much action as he’s given us over the years, Spencer Fisher is a spent force as an enterprising UFC lightweight.
