Tag: freak show fights

KSW 19 Recap: Multiverse – 1 Dignity – 0


Is there ANYTHING about this man that makes him unqualified to talk about the infinitely accelerating current of creativity? Didn’t think so.

If last night taught us anything, it’s that some things never change. Nick Diaz will be Nick Diaz. Kimbo Slice will crush cans. And literally anything that involves Bob Sapp will lack anything that resembles dignity. What a universe we live in.

But today is Mother’s Day, so I’m going to try to be somewhat positive for a few sentences. The good news to come out of this event is that Matt Horwich managed to snap a four fight skid with a third round TKO over Poland’s own Antoni Chmielewski, who was 22-8 coming into this fight. Horwich has always been an interesting character, sort of a non-juiced up hippy Ultimate Warrior. Even though he’s too crazy for most major promotions to take a chance on him (not to mention his pedestrian 27-21 record), he fits in just fine with KSW’s roster. That wouldn’t usually be intended as a compliment, but in whatever section of the multiverse Matt Horwich is from, it is.

Video of Horwich’s victory and the freak show that was Bob Sapp vs. Mariusz Pudzianowski after the jump.


Is there ANYTHING about this man that makes him unqualified to talk about the infinitely accelerating current of creativity? Didn’t think so.

If last night taught us anything, it’s that some things never change. Nick Diaz will be Nick Diaz. Kimbo Slice will crush cans. And literally anything that involves Bob Sapp will lack anything that resembles dignity. What a universe we live in.

But today is Mother’s Day, so I’m going to try to be somewhat positive for a few sentences. The good news to come out of this event is that Matt Horwich managed to snap a four fight skid with a third round TKO over Poland’s own Antoni Chmielewski, who was 22-8 coming into this fight. Horwich has always been an interesting character, sort of a non-juiced up hippy Ultimate Warrior. Even though he’s too crazy for most major promotions to take a chance on him (not to mention his pedestrian 27-21 record), he fits in just fine with KSW’s roster. That wouldn’t usually be intended as a compliment, but in whatever section of the multiverse Matt Horwich is from, it is.

Okay, positive sentences over. Time to talk about Bob Sapp vs. Mariusz Pudzianowski.

I think it’s safe to say that Bob Sapp can’t do anything right at this point in his career, except be a large, scary looking guy that has zero chance of winning and even less of a chance of hurting his opponent. At the weigh-ins, he put a picture of Pudzianowski on a (presumably uncooked) chicken. See, because he thinks Mariusz is “chicken”, get it? It’s not exactly the most clever way to mock someone- especially when you remember that Bob Sapp just tapped out to a double leg takedown- but he clearly put far more effort into that than he did training.

Perhaps it’s only because he was fighting Bob Sapp, but Mariusz seems to have made strides in his standup. I’m not saying he’s ready for legit competition or anything, but still, props to him for taking this fight seriously. You know the drill by now: Sapp gets caught, Sapp covers up and waits for the “fight” to end, the referee decides that the fight should stop before Bob Sapp actually takes some kind of damage (even though Pudzianowski initially doesn’t oblige), and then everyone is laughing and giving out bro-grabs afterwards, seemingly forgetting that Sapp was “out” just a few seconds ago.

As KSW likes to say, biznes jak zwykle. At least I think it’s them that says that.

Full Results

Mariusz Pudzianowski def. Bob Sapp via TKO, Round One
Mamed Khalidov def. Rodney Wallace via KO, Round One
Michal Materla def. Jay Silva via Majority Decision
Matt Horwich def. Antoni Chmielewski via TKO, Round Three
Aslambek Saidov def. Grigor Aschugbabjan via submission (Kimura), Round One
Marta Chojnoska def. Paulina Suska via submission (Scarf Hold Armlock), Round One
Borys Mankowski def. Marcin Naruszczka via Majority Decision

Robert Burneika’s MMA Debut Was Even Shittier Than Expected [VIDEO]


(Damn. Even Tank Abbott is embarrassed by that garbage.)

You may recall Robert Burneika, the Lithuanian strongman who had been preparing for his MMA debut mostly by high-kicking watermelons. Becoming the next Mariusz Pudzianowski is a questionable goal to shoot for, but Burneika took the first step Friday night at MMA ATTACK 2 in Katowice, Poland, by scoring a second-round stoppage over Polish tomato can Marcin Najman, who also happened to be Pudz’s first MMA victim. We kept our expectations low for this matchup, and the fight still fell short, for two main reasons:

– The way Burneika lunges forward with those front kicks suggests that he may not have had a legit Muay Thai coach in his camp.

– Najman spent the entire fight running in circles to avoid engaging, which gave the match an unfortunate Kimbo/Houston vibe. In five-and-a-half minutes of fight time, Najman threw less than ten strikes. I think it’s safe to say that he respected Burneika’s power a little too much.

If you want to get a look at the future of Polish freak-show fighting, check out the full video after the jump. 3:57-4:11 is pure slapstick.


(Damn. Even Tank Abbott is embarrassed by that garbage.)

You may recall Robert Burneika, the Lithuanian strongman who had been preparing for his MMA debut mostly by high-kicking watermelons. Becoming the next Mariusz Pudzianowski is a questionable goal to shoot for, but Burneika took the first step Friday night at MMA ATTACK 2 in Katowice, Poland, by scoring a second-round stoppage over Polish tomato can Marcin Najman, who also happened to be Pudz’s first MMA victim. We kept our expectations low for this matchup, and the fight still fell short, for two main reasons:

– The way Burneika lunges forward with those front kicks suggests that he may not have had a legit Muay Thai coach in his camp.

– Najman spent the entire fight running in circles to avoid engaging, which gave the match an unfortunate Kimbo/Houston vibe. In five-and-a-half minutes of fight time, Najman threw less than ten strikes. I think it’s safe to say that he respected Burneika’s power a little too much.

If you want to get a look at the future of Polish freak-show fighting, check out the full video after the jump. 3:57-4:11 is pure slapstick.

Sadly, Brian Stann Will Not Be Fighting Minowaman in Japan


(And here we have some lovely fan art of Minowaman doing battle with Godzilla and Ghidorah, while a rocket blasts out of his crotch. / Props: mma-core)

So this is weird: Coming off his submission loss to Chael Sonnen last month, Brian Stann was briefly under the impression that he’d be getting a rebound fight against a mulleted giant-killer in the Land of the Rising Sun. As Stann told MMA Sucka (tip via MiddleEasy):

“I thought I was fighting on the UFC card in Tokyo. I thought I was going to fight a gentleman by the name of Ikuhisa Minowa or ‘Minowaman’ and unfortunately, you know, the fight didn’t happen. He actually asked to fight me. I agreed and then for some reason it just didn’t materialize…From what I was told by the UFC, I think they already filled the main card for that one, so there’s not really any room for me anymore.”


(And here we have some lovely fan art of Minowaman doing battle with Godzilla and Ghidorah, while a rocket blasts out of his crotch. / Props: mma-core)

So this is weird: Coming off his submission loss to Chael Sonnen last month, Brian Stann was briefly under the impression that he’d be getting a rebound fight against a mulleted giant-killer in the Land of the Rising Sun. As Stann told MMA Sucka (tip via MiddleEasy):

“I thought I was fighting on the UFC card in Tokyo. I thought I was going to fight a gentleman by the name of Ikuhisa Minowa or ‘Minowaman’ and unfortunately, you know, the fight didn’t happen. He actually asked to fight me. I agreed and then for some reason it just didn’t materialize…From what I was told by the UFC, I think they already filled the main card for that one, so there’s not really any room for me anymore.”

Best known for leg-locking enormous men in Japanese freak show fights, Minowa has built a career as the David to the MMA world’s Goliaths, scoring career victories over Bob Sapp, Butterbean, Giant Silva, Hong Man Choi, Kimo Leopoldo, and many other opponents who carried more mass than skill into the ring. But he also had one UFC appearance back in April 2000, stopping the relatively normal-sized Joe Slick by cut-TKO.

In a way, the “All American Hero” vs. the “Japanese Underdog in the Red Shorty-Shorts” would be an undeniably entertaining storyline for the UFC’s return to Japan — and it’s kind of a bummer that it’s not happening. Still, does this mean that the UFC is considering booking Minowaman against somebody at UFC 144? Sean McCorkle might want to clear his schedule…