Invicta FC 5 Announced With Two Title Fights, Zoila Gurgel and Sarah Kaufman’s Debuts, And the Return of Bec Hyatt and Veronica Rothenhausler


(Thai glamour shot via Michelle Waterson’s Facebook page.)

Not that we don’t appreciate the UFC’s generous one-female-fight-every-couple-months schedule, but in terms of competitive matchups and depth of talent, Invicta FC is still the premiere promotion for women’s MMA. And as long as they can avoid more technical foul-ups this time, Invicta’s fifth card looks like a real corker.

As announced yesterday via press-release, Invicta FC 5 will go down Friday, April 5th at the Ameristar Casino Hotel in Kansas City, Missouri, featuring two title fights and 12 more bouts featuring a deep roster of well-known contenders. Check out some of the matchup highlights below, and the full event lineup at the end of this post…

Jessica Penne (10-1) vs. Michelle Waterson (10-3), for atomweight championship: Penne won Invicta’s inaugural 105-pound title last October at Invicta 3 with her submission victory over Naho Sugiyama. The Karate Hottie won her Invicta debut at the same event, defeating Lacey Schuckman by split-decision and increasing her total win streak to four.

Barb Honchak (7-2) vs. Vanessa Porto (13-5), for inaugural flyweight championship: Honchak is on a roll with six straight wins — including a decision over Felice Herrig and a submission of Roxanne Modafferi — and has gone 2-0 under the Invicta banner. Porto is coming off her decision win over Tara LaRosa at Invicta FC 3, which followed a loss to Sarah D’Alelio.

Zoila Frausto Gurgel (12-2) vs. Jennifer Maia (6-2): With her Bellator career now in the rear-view mirror, Zoila Gurgel will make her Invicta FC debut in a flyweight bout against Chute Boxe-bred newcomer Jennifer Maia.


(Thai glamour shot via Michelle Waterson’s Facebook page.)

Not that we don’t appreciate the UFC’s generous one-female-fight-every-couple-months schedule, but in terms of competitive matchups and depth of talent, Invicta FC is still the premiere promotion for women’s MMA. And as long as they can avoid more technical foul-ups this time, Invicta’s fifth card looks like a real corker.

As announced yesterday via press-release, Invicta FC 5 will go down Friday, April 5th at the Ameristar Casino Hotel in Kansas City, Missouri, featuring two title fights and 12 more bouts featuring a deep roster of well-known contenders. Check out some of the matchup highlights below, and the full event lineup at the end of this post…

Jessica Penne (10-1) vs. Michelle Waterson (10-3), for atomweight championship: Penne won Invicta’s inaugural 105-pound title last October at Invicta 3 with her submission victory over Naho Sugiyama. The Karate Hottie won her Invicta debut at the same event, defeating Lacey Schuckman by split-decision and increasing her total win streak to four.

Barb Honchak (7-2) vs. Vanessa Porto (13-5), for inaugural flyweight championship: Honchak is on a roll with six straight wins — including a decision over Felice Herrig and a submission of Roxanne Modafferi — and has gone 2-0 under the Invicta banner. Porto is coming off her decision win over Tara LaRosa at Invicta FC 3, which followed a loss to Sarah D’Alelio.

Zoila Frausto Gurgel (12-2) vs. Jennifer Maia (6-2): With her Bellator career now in the rear-view mirror, Zoila Gurgel will make her Invicta FC debut in a flyweight bout against Chute Boxe-bred newcomer Jennifer Maia.

Sarah Kaufman (15-2) vs. Leslie Smith (5-2): Speaking of ex-champs making their Invicta debuts, former Strikeforce 135-pound champion Sarah Kaufman will enter the promotion against Cesar Gracie product Leslie Smith. Kaufman was scheduled to face Kaitlin Young at Invicta 3 but had to withdraw due to injury.

Bec Hyatt (4-2) vs. Jasminka Cive (5-0): Colorful Aussie Hyatt will try to rebound from her decision loss to Carla Esparza in their strawweight title fight, against undefeated Austrian Jasminka Cive, who has won all five of her professional fights by stoppage.

Rose Namajunas (1-0) vs. Kathina Catron (2-1): Pat Barry’s g.f. returns to the Invicta cage against fellow strawweight Kathina “Kill Switch” Catron, who’s coming off a submission loss to Jordan Nicole Gaza earlier this month

Veronica Rothenhausler (1-0) vs. Mollie Estes (1-1): Rothenhausler, the up-and-coming featherweight knockout specialist responsible for this and that, will hunt for another first-round KO against Estes, who hasn’t competed since her TKO loss to Randi Miller at Invicta 1 last April.

MAIN CARD
Jessica Penne vs. Michelle Waterson
Barb Honchak vs. Vanessa Porto
Zoila Frausto Gurgel vs. Jennifer Maia
Sarah Kaufman vs. Leslie Smith
Amanda Nunes vs. Kaitlin Young
Julia Budd vs. Ediane Gomes
Nicdali Rivera-Calanoc vs. Cassie Rodish
Bec Hyatt vs. Jasminka Cive
Katja Kankaanpaa vs. Juliana Carnerio Lima

PRELIMINARY CARD
Jessamyn Duke vs. Miriam Nakamoto
Alexandra Chambers vs. Jodie Esquibel
Rose Namajunas vs. Kathina Catron
Veronica Rothenhausler vs. Mollie Estes
Lauren Barefoot vs. River Jones

[VIDEO] Megumi Fujii Scores Unanimous Decision Victory in What May Be Her Final Fight

What a difference two years can make. Back in 2010, Megumi Fujii was basically being labeled as the Fedor Emelianenko (circa 2007) of Women’s MMA — a mysterious, unstoppable killing machine who would easily run through all American opposition whenever she decided to make the move stateside. And indeed, her first three Bellator performances cemented her status as the top dog at 115 pounds, ending in two armbar stoppages and one TKO finish. Scratch that, her first four performances lived up to the hype she had built in Japan, the only difference in her fourth performance at Bellator 34 being that she let the fight go to decision and was therefore screwed out of a title for reasons unknown. Fujii’s opponent in that fight, Zoila Gurgel, would honor this gift decision by never defending said belt again, while Fujii would fight just once more in America, losing a unanimous decision to Jessica Aguilar at Bellator 69 in May of this year.

Shame decision aside, Fujii returned to action on Christmas Eve to square off against Mei Yamaguchi at Vale Tudo Japan 2012 and walked away with a clear cut unanimous decision victory, the video of which is above. Rumors circulated before the event that this would be Fujii’s final WMMA fight, and although she has yet to officially retire, the general consensus seems to be that the rumors are true.

We will hold off on the video tribute until an official announcement is made, but join us after the jump for a wicked highlight of Fujii’s reign of terror.

What a difference two years can make. Back in 2010, Megumi Fujii was basically being labeled as the Fedor Emelianenko (circa 2007) of Women’s MMA — a mysterious, unstoppable killing machine who would easily run through all American opposition whenever she decided to make the move stateside. And indeed, her first three Bellator performances cemented her status as the top dog at 115 pounds, ending in two armbar stoppages and one TKO finish. Scratch that, her first four performances lived up to the hype she had built in Japan, the only difference in her fourth performance at Bellator 34 being that she let the fight go to decision and was therefore screwed out of a title for reasons unknown. Fujii’s opponent in that fight, Zoila Gurgel, would honor this gift decision by never defending said belt again, while Fujii would fight just once more in America, losing a unanimous decision to Jessica Aguilar at Bellator 69 in May of this year.

Shame decision aside, Fujii returned to action on Christmas Eve to square off against Mei Yamaguchi at Vale Tudo Japan 2012 and walked away with a clear cut unanimous decision victory, the video of which is above. Rumors circulated before the event that this would be Fujii’s final WMMA fight, and although she has yet to officially retire, the general consensus seems to be that the rumors are true.

We will hold off on the video tribute until an official announcement is made, but join us after the jump for a wicked highlight of Fujii’s reign of terror.

Fun Fact: In Japanese, Megumi Fujii means “Face of puppy, heart of rabid dog.” 

 

Sure, that’s a lie, but I guarantee you had to look it up first.

J. Jones

Bellator 83 Recap: The Great 2012 Injury Curse Strikes Yet, Yet, Yet, Yet Again

(I don’t know, this song seems oddly appropriate.) 

Let me ask you something, Potato Nation; after the unstoppable killing machine that is the 2012 injury curse claimed Tim Means via sauna room KO yesterday, did you think there was any possible way it could get worse? I may not know what your answer is, but I’m going to go ahead and declare you DEAD F*CKING WRONG. Last night’s Bellator 83 main event was supposed to determine the winner of the Season Seven Featherweight Tournament, pitting Shahbulat Shamhalaev against Rad Martinez. But oh, if only life were so simple. Not content with claiming fighters in the days before a fight, the injury curse struck down Shamhalaev with food poisoning during the God damn broadcast last night, forcing the bout to be shuffled to next week’s Bellator 84 card, where one of these two will probably obliterate the testicles of their opponent with a low kick and we can start this tragic experiment all over again.

Now without a main event, the co-main event matchup between former Bellator bantamweight champion Zach Mackovsky and Anthony Leone was bumped up to top billing. But I don’t want to talk about that fight (which Leone out-grappled the undersized Mackovsky en route to a SD victory). I want to talk about the flyweight matchup between Jessica Eye and Bellator 115 pound champ Zoila Gurgel, which despite lasting less than a minute was easily the highlight of a night filled with decisions.

Video and full results after the jump. 


(I don’t know, this song seems oddly appropriate.) 

Let me ask you something, Potato Nation; after the unstoppable killing machine that is the 2012 injury curse claimed Tim Means via sauna room KO yesterday, did you think there was any possible way it could get worse? I may not know what your answer is, but I’m going to go ahead and declare you DEAD F*CKING WRONG. Last night’s Bellator 83 main event was supposed to determine the winner of the Season Seven Featherweight Tournament, pitting Shahbulat Shamhalaev against Rad Martinez. But oh, if only life were so simple. Not content with claiming fighters in the days before a fight, the injury curse struck down Shamhalaev with food poisoning during the God damn broadcast last night, forcing the bout to be shuffled to next week’s Bellator 84 card, where one of these two will probably obliterate the testicles of their opponent with a low kick and we can start this tragic experiment all over again.

Now without a main event, the co-main event matchup between former Bellator bantamweight champion Zach Mackovsky and Anthony Leone was bumped up to top billing. But I don’t want to talk about that fight (which Leone out-grappled the undersized Mackovsky en route to a SD victory). I want to talk about the flyweight matchup between Jessica Eye and Bellator 115 pound champ Zoila Gurgel, which despite lasting less than a minute was easily the highlight of a night filled with decisions.

We know that Bellator CEO Bjorn Rebney reads CagePotato, like, religiously. We know this. Yet for some reason, he refuses to heed our advice about having his promotion’s champions fight in non-title fights. Granted, Bellator’s relationship with 115 pound female champion Zolia Gurgel is rocky to say the least, but the fact that she’s fought two non-title flyweight bouts since winning the belt is a little puzzling to say the least. In either case, you knew it was going to catch up to her eventually, but not many knew it would come in such quick, violent fashion as it did last night.

Squaring off against the 8-1 Jessica “Evil” Eye (official CP nickname “Easy On The“), Gurgel looked to establish her dominance on the feet early. Unfortunately for her, Eye ate her early shots and delivered some better ones of her own, dropping Gurgel mere seconds into the fight. In the scramble that ensued, Eye latched onto a standing arm-triangle ala Matt Riddle vs. Chris Clements that seemed ambitious at best at first. However, Eye made the correct adjustments and simply thrashed Gurgel against the cage until she collapsed in a heap, unconscious and pale faced. Referee Bill Bookwalter called an end to the contest just 58 seconds in. If there was ever an indication that Gurgel should stick to the class she’s the champion of, that was it. Then again, she told ReX that she plans to stay at 125, so I guess it’s back to the drawing board. A great win for Eye, though.

Full results from Bellator 83 are below.

Main Card
Rad Martinez vs. Shahbulat Shamhalaev (fight postponed to Dec. 14, Shamhalaev withdrew due to food poisoning)
Anthony Leone def. Zach Makovsky via split decision (29-28, 29-28, 28-29)
Jessica Eye def. Zoila Gurgel via arm triangle choke submission, Rd. 1 (0:58)
Darrell Horcher def. Chris Liguori via unanimous decision (29-28, 29-28, 29-28)

Undercard
Mike Wessel def. Alexei Kudin via unanimous decision (29-28, 29-28, 29-28)
Jimmie Rivera def. Jesse Brock via unanimous decision (29-28, 29-28, 29-28)
Terrell Hobbs def. Brylan Van Artsdalen via rear naked choke submission, Rd. 1 (3:07)
Tuan Phan def. Matthew Lozano via unanimous decision (29-28, 29-28, 29-28)
Claudio Ledesma def. Bo Harris via unanimous decision (30-27, 30-27, 30-27)

J. Jones

Bellator 78 Results: Good, Koreshkov Advance to Welterweight Finals

When I managed to speak to Bellator CEO Bjorn Rebney after Bellator 69 in Lake Charles, Louisiana, he spoke very highly of welterweight prospect Andrey Koreshkov, who had just improved to 10-0 that evening.  The twenty-two year old Russian fighter earned a spot in this season’s welterweight tournament, where he would quietly improve to 11-0 at Bellator 74 with a unanimous decision over Jordan Smith. At last night’s Bellator 78, Koreshkov looked to make a name for himself against Marius Zaromskis in the tournament semifinals.

But before we get too far ahead of ourselves, let’s talk about the main event of the evening. Former Bellator welterweight champion Lyman Good took the next step towards earning the title back with a second round TKO over Michail Tsarev, although he arguably could not have picked up a more unimpressive victory. This isn’t to say that Good looked bad up until that point -he didn’t – but because the stoppage was, frankly, cheap. Good accidentally poked Tsarev in the eye in the middle of the second round, causing Tsarev to turn to the referee looking for time out. It looked like the referee was about to call for a break in the action, but Lyman Good pounced on “The Lonely Wolf.” The TKO victory was awarded to Good shortly afterwards.

Video of the main event, as well as Koreshkov’s victory, is after the jump

When I managed to speak to Bellator CEO Bjorn Rebney after Bellator 69 in Lake Charles, Louisiana, he spoke very highly of welterweight prospect Andrey Koreshkov, who had just improved to 10-0 that evening.  The twenty-two year old Russian fighter earned a spot in this season’s welterweight tournament, where he would quietly improve to 11-0 at Bellator 74 with a unanimous decision over Jordan Smith. At last night’s Bellator 78, Koreshkov looked to make a name for himself against Marius Zaromskis in the tournament semifinals.

But before we get too far ahead of ourselves, let’s talk about the main event of the evening. Former Bellator welterweight champion Lyman Good took the next step towards earning the title back with a second round TKO over Michail Tsarev, although he arguably could not have picked up a more unimpressive victory. This isn’t to say that Good looked bad up until that point -he didn’t – but because the stoppage was, frankly, cheap. Good accidentally poked Tsarev in the eye in the middle of the second round, causing Tsarev to turn to the referee looking for time out. It looked like the referee was about to call for a break in the action, but Lyman Good pounced on “The Lonely Wolf.” The TKO victory was awarded to Good shortly afterwards.


Good vs. Tsarev. This fight is why they say protect yourselves at all times, guys.

In the evening’s co-main event, Andrey Koreshkov lived up to his hype with a first round TKO over Marius Zaromskis. Zaromskis couldn’t find his range against the young, aggressive Russian striker, absorbing some hard punches and knees while mounting little offense of his own. Two minutes into the fight, a left hand from Koreshkov dropped Zaromskis to the mat allowing Andrey Koreshkov to drop punches to Marius’ head until the referee waived things off.

Koreshkov and Good will fight each other in the Welterweight tournament finals.


Koreshkov vs. Zaromskis

In non-tournament action, Daniel Straus returned to action last night, opting to take a warm-up fight before his featherweight title shot against the winner of the upcoming Pat Curran/Patricio Pitbull fight. While there’s a lot that can go wrong in these situations – namely the challenger loses and/or gets injured – Straus dominated his opponent, UFC veteran Alvin Robinson, on his way to a second round rear-naked choke victory. Also on the main card, Brian Rogers took to the cage for the first time since walking away from his job as a special education teacher to focus on fighting full-time. Rogers looked impressive against Dominique Steele, showing the aggression he’s known for, but also showing the patience and control he usually lacked. In the end, Rogers walked away with a unanimous decision victory.

One final note: Zoila Gurgel, the current Bellator 115-pound women’s champion who has yet to defend her title, returned to action last night on the preliminary card. In the non-title bout, Gurgel fought 4-2 fighter Casey Noland. Booking the champion in a non-title bout on the preliminary card of an event is already a pretty bad sign, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that Bjorn Rebney said before the fight that he’d assess Gurgel afterward. The good news for Gurgel is that she obviously won the fight. However, it’ll be interesting to see how confident Rebney feels moving forward with Zoila Gurgel after watching her lose the first round to a 4-2 no-name fighter who was essentially brought in to lose.

Full Results:

Main Card

Lyman Good def. Michail Tsarev via TKO (strikes), 3:54 of Round Two
Andrey Koreshkov def. Marius Zaromskis via TKO (strikes), 2:14 of Round One
Daniel Straus def. Alvin Robinson via submission (rear-naked choke), 4:51 of Round Two
Brian Rogers def. Dominique Steele via unanimous decision

Preliminary Card

Zoila Gurgel def. Casey Noland via unanimous decision
Jason Butcher vs. Shaun Asher via submission (guillotine choke), 1:32 of Round One
Billy Horne def. Trey Houston via submission (rear-naked choke), 3:30 of Round One
Mikkel Parlo def. Jared Combs via TKO (strikes), 3:51 of Round One
Rob Hanna def. Rocky Edwards via split decision
Justin McNally def. David Blattman via submission (triangle choke), 0:38 of Round One

@SethFalvo

Zoila Frausto Gurgel Thinks Mothafuckas Forgot About Zoila Frausto Gurgel, Has Something to Say

Zoila Frausto Gurgel is the goddamn champion of the world, and don’t you forget it. PicProps:  Zoila’s FaceBook, because we’re down like that.

Bellator 66 went down in Cleveland, Ohio last night, and I assume someone here will recap it for you, because it was the usual entertaining show from Bellator.  We saw some great tournament action at lightweight and middleweight, plus the Alvarez-Aoki rematch that I’ve been waiting for, and all I had to do was watch MTV2.  Remember when MTV2 was started as the station for music 24/7? **sigh**

Something you didn’t see on the broadcast last night was an interview with reigning women’s 115 champion Zoila Frausto Gurgel.  You didn’t see it, because it didn’t happen.  It didn’t happen, because everyone would rather pretend that the entire women’s tournament didn’t happen.  Everyone, that is, except for Zoila Frausto Gurgel herself.  Zoila Frausto Gurgel wants you to remember it, and give her a high-five when you see her, too.  And if you don’t, Zoila Frausto Gurgel will go on social media and complain about it.

Zoila Frausto Gurgel is the goddamn champion of the world, and don’t you forget it. PicProps:  Zoila’s FaceBook, because we’re down like that.

Bellator 66 went down in Cleveland, Ohio last night, and I assume someone here will recap it for you, because it was the usual entertaining show from Bellator.  We saw some great tournament action at lightweight and middleweight, plus the Alvarez-Aoki rematch that I’ve been waiting for, and all I had to do was watch MTV2.  Remember when MTV2 was started as the station for music 24/7? **sigh**

Something you didn’t see on the broadcast last night was an interview with reigning women’s 115 champion Zoila Frausto Gurgel.  You didn’t see it, because it didn’t happen.  It didn’t happen, because everyone would rather pretend that the entire women’s tournament didn’t happen.  Everyone, that is, except for Zoila Frausto Gurgel herself.  Zoila Frausto Gurgel wants you to remember it, and give her a high-five when you see her, too.  And if you don’t, Zoila Frausto Gurgel will go on social media and complain about it.

Quick recap:

*  Zoila is fucking huge at 115.  It’s understandable that she cut down for the only tournament for women in 2010, but she was obviously the Rumble Johnson of the women’s division.

*  She got a gift decision over Jessica Aguilar.  Don’t argue that with me, or I’ll punch you in all twelve of your kidneys.

*  She got a gift decision over Megumi Fujii to win the belt, and worse — ended Fujii’s epic win streak.  When MegaMegu burst into tears after the decision, it did ugly things in the heart-places of Fujii fans everywhere.

*  Since winning the 115 pound tournament, Zoila has had exactly one (1) fight, at 125 pounds.  She then tore her knee because one of those Fujii fans I mentioned a second ago finally succeeded in their voodoo experiments. Apparently it has to be a chicken with all-white feathers.

*  Gurgel started a collection to cover her medical bills from aforementioned effed-up knee.  Fans did not react well.

And after all that, Zoila wants to complain because no one gives her the respect she deserves for being a champ.

 

WHY DOESN”T SOMEONE TALK TO HER ABOUT HER BELT FOR BEING CHAMP AT 115 POUNDS?

 

 
Oh.

 

[RX]

CagePotato Roundtable #2: What Was the Greatest Robbery in MMA History?

CagePotato Roundtable is our new recurring column in which the CP writing staff and some of our friends all get together to debate an MMA-related topic. Joining us this week is former CagePotato staff writer Chad Dundas, who now writes for an up-and-coming blog called ESPN. If you have a suggestion for a future Roundtable column, send it to [email protected].

CagePotato reader Alexander W. writes: “The Demetrious Johnson vs. Ian McCall fight inspired my suggestion: Greatest robberies in MMA history. I’d be curious to hear the variety of opinions out there. Surely that fight was a top ten.”

Chad Dundas

There are a lot of things about Pride Total Elimination 2003 that don’t make sense when viewed with modern MMA sensibilities. How to even comprehend a world where a skinny, haired-up, suit jacket-wearing Dana White could bet Pride bigwigs $250,000 that Chuck Liddell was going to win that company’s 2003 middleweight grand prix? Or comprehend that a bizarrely dangerous and clearly-enunciating Liddell showed up in the first round of said tournament and KTFOed an impossibly svelte Alistair Overeem? Or that Overeem had an old dude in a robe and shriners hat accompany him to the ring while carrying a big foam hammer? Or that on this night somebody got tapped out with a sleeve choke? Or that Wanderlei Silva fought Kazushi Sakuraba and it didn’t just make everybody feel sad and empty?

No sense at all.

What does still sort of make sense is this: After watching Liddell sleep Overeem, there was no way on God’s green Earth that Pride judges were going to let another UFC emissary walk out of Saitama Super Arena with a win*, so they conspired to pull off one of the greatest screwjobs in MMA history when they awarded Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira a unanimous decision over Ricco Rodriguez. The indisputable fact is, Ricco whipped Big Nog good that night, taking him down, brutalizing him, shaking off his feeble submission attempts and controlling pretty much the whole affair. At least, that’s how I remember it. Unfortunately, due to Zuffa’s ongoing war on Internet piracy it seems their bout will only be remembered by history and by the creepy old man who answers the queries you submit to the Sherdog Fight Finder.

CagePotato Roundtable is our new recurring column in which the CP writing staff and some of our friends all get together to debate an MMA-related topic. Joining us this week is former CagePotato staff writer Chad Dundas, who now writes for an up-and-coming blog called ESPN. If you have a suggestion for a future Roundtable column, send it to [email protected].

CagePotato reader Alexander W. writes: “The Demetrious Johnson vs. Ian McCall fight inspired my suggestion: Greatest robberies in MMA history. I’d be curious to hear the variety of opinions out there. Surely that fight was a top ten.”

Chad Dundas

There are a lot of things about Pride Total Elimination 2003 that don’t make sense when viewed with modern MMA sensibilities. How to even comprehend a world where a skinny, haired-up, suit jacket-wearing Dana White could bet Pride bigwigs $250,000 that Chuck Liddell was going to win that company’s 2003 middleweight grand prix? Or comprehend that a bizarrely dangerous and clearly-enunciating Liddell showed up in the first round of said tournament and KTFOed an impossibly svelte Alistair Overeem? Or that Overeem had an old dude in a robe and shriners hat accompany him to the ring while carrying a big foam hammer? Or that on this night somebody got tapped out with a sleeve choke? Or that Wanderlei Silva fought Kazushi Sakuraba and it didn’t just make everybody feel sad and empty?

No sense at all.

What does still sort of make sense is this: After watching Liddell sleep Overeem, there was no way on God’s green Earth that Pride judges were going to let another UFC emissary walk out of Saitama Super Arena with a win*, so they conspired to pull off one of the greatest screwjobs in MMA history when they awarded Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira a unanimous decision over Ricco Rodriguez. The indisputable fact is, Ricco whipped Big Nog good that night, taking him down, brutalizing him, shaking off his feeble submission attempts and controlling pretty much the whole affair. At least, that’s how I remember it. Unfortunately, due to Zuffa’s ongoing war on Internet piracy it seems their bout will only be remembered by history and by the creepy old man who answers the queries you submit to the Sherdog Fight Finder.

What stings the worst about the whole thing is that it’s easy to imagine an alternate universe where that decision went the other way. In that universe, maybe Rodriguez goes on to become one of the sport’s most beloved and respected figures, ascending to full-on legendary status and winning gold in both Pride and the UFC, before having his arm snapped by Frank Mir at UFC 140 without so much as changing the expression on his beautiful, leathery face. And instead it’s Big Nog who slips unceremoniously into obscurity, slumming it on Celebrity Rehab and fighting out his days at events like Israel FC, Cage Thug MMA, and Armageddon Fighting Championships.

If that universe is out there somewhere, I hope we all find it someday.

(*Yeah, I’m just guessing about all this, but it feels true in spirit.)

Doug “ReX CaiolaBatata” Richardson

Look, everyone knows that a robbery in PRIDE means nothing because the whole thing was fake anyway. At least in those cases, you knew that the judges had their reasons. Here in America, we have robberies based off of pure, home-grown stupid. We produced the master karate sensai judge that thinks leg kicks are pointless. Out on the regional scene, in places like Texas, Ohio, Florida, and Arizona, we’ve seen decisions passed down that were mind-gobblingly incompetent. Try to forget that those same states are players in national politics.

So let me tell you bastards about Zoila Frausto. Frausto was fighting at bantamweight and walking around at 150 pounds before Bellator announced its only tournament for women in 2010 — at 115. It was a brutal weight cut, but Frausto made it. Throughout the tournament, her most impressive victories were over the scales. A bland weight-loss diet left her unable to train intensely, and her performances in the cage were every bit as anemic as you’d expect. She out-muscled a visibly smaller boxer in Jessica Pene in the quarter-finals, earning an uncontroversial, but uninspiring win.

Her opponent in the semis at Bellator 31 was Jessica Aguilar, a fantastically well-rounded fighter out of American Top Team. The Warrior Princess spent most of the fight backpedaling, and her face told a bruising tale after fifteen minutes. Aguilar didn’t have a scratch, but Frausto got a split decision — one of the judges gave her all three rounds. I honestly thought the judges were confused about the fighters’ identities — the decision was that bad. So Frausto advanced to the finals.

Here, at least, justice would be done. Frausto’s opponent was Megumi Fujii, the undefeated, best female fighter on the planet (she’s not a can crusher ben dammit icanthearyou lalalalalalalalalalala). Fujii had outclassed both her opponents in the tournament, and she’d have her way with this interloper and claim an American title.

Except she wouldn’t. Fujii, like some kind of insane Sakuraba with a vagina, elected to stand and box with the one-dimensional striker. Frausto does her best Leonard Garcia impression [Ed. note: Hold on, I’m getting to that. -BG], putting on an impressive show of offense without actually managing to do anything or even land most of her attacks. Fujii out-lands her, out-maneuvers her, and out-works her. But those big arm movements must be impressive from a distance. Despite Frausto’s swollen face and rapidly closing eye, one Florida judge scores it four rounds to one for her, another sees it a bit closer, one judge has a brain in his head but he’s outvoted and boom: Frausto catches another gift decision and claims the Bellator Straw-weight Championship.

Rematches with both Aguilar and Fujii have been pursued, but neither have ever materialized. To this day, the women’s rankings are skewed and Frausto retains the belt. She’s hasn’t fought at 115 since October 2010.

Ben Goldstein

Greatest robbery in MMA history? Lee Murray vs. Securitas, no comparison. The dude masterminds an elaborate kidnapping/cash depot heist, and walks off with over $86 million before going on the lam in Morocco. That’s even more impressive than beating Tito Ortiz’s ass in an alley.

If you need a “real” answer, then fine: Leonard Garcia vs. Chan Sung Jung at WEC 48, which is the robbery by which all modern robberies are judged. It’s the LeBron James of robberies. Judges love Leonard Garcia because he grunts like a female tennis player when he throws punches, and that irrational love helped Garcia take a similar decision against Nam Phan in December 2010, and previously hypnotized one judge into scoring it Garcia’s way when he got blown out in all three rounds against Mark Hominick at WEC 51. But Garcia/Jung 1 has to be the worst of the lot — or anybody’s lot — because it added a foul aftertaste to the greatest MMA brawl since Griffin vs. Bonnar at the TUF 1 Finale. It’s the proverbial poop-pie at the end of a great southern meal.

According to FightMetric, Garcia shouldn’t have won any rounds of that fight, let alone two. Here’s how Bad Boy clinched the split-decision, despite being outstruck 106-71 — he scored two takedowns, and he was the aggressor for much of the fight, meaning that the faces he made while audibly whiffing his hooks were much scarier than his opponent’s, as the Korean Zombie was tagging Leonard at will. Obviously it wasn’t a career-ender for Jung, who got his revenge 11 months later. But it was such a perfect representation of what’s wrong with modern MMA judging: Striking totals don’t matter, each takedown counts for a billion points, and “Octagon Control” can always be used to justify scoring it for the guy you like better. Ugh. Terrible.

Jefferey “Karmaatemycat” Watts

Whenever I think of a robbery, normally Matt Hamill and Michael Bisping immediately come to mind. But a fight that tops even that is Machida/Rua 1 at UFC 104. That fight was incredibly hyped because of “The Machida Era.” Everyone was so entranced by the Elusive one. The Dragon had us eating out of the palm of his hand. Besides, nobody really knew which Mauricio “Shogun” Rua would show up for the fight and to be honest, who could blame them? After multiple knee surgeries, a broken arm, and some seriously lackluster performances not many people saw this as anything but an uphill battle for Rua. Machida was even favored in the odds by over 4-1, and for good reason.

However, right from the start, Shogun took to the center of the Octagon and kept cutting angles on Machida. That set the stage for some dirty boxing but more importantly some incredibly vicious leg kicks. It was evident before the end of the first round that Shogun was landing the more damaging shots. Machida started off in southpaw, but as I said, those leg kicks quickly changed all of that, seeing as Machida needed to change stances during round three.

It became apparent in round four and five that Machida had slowed down considerably. Meanwhile, Rua kept pushing forward, landing harder strikes, cutting Machida off with angles, and pushing him against the cage. It seemed like Rua had it all in the bag. It isn’t often you find yourself agreeing with Mike Goldberg but this seemed like one of those times, a clear-cut unanimous decision for the challenger, right? Wrong.

Judges Cecil Peoples, Nelson Hamilton, and Marcos Rosales scored the bout 48-47 for Machida. Rosales and Peoples both scored the first three rounds in favor of the champion, while Hamilton gave Machida rounds two, three, and four. After the fight, Cecil Peoples stated that leg kicks don’t win fights, and further explained that he thought Machida was landing the cleaner, more efficient shots during the entirety of the fight. FightMetric, however, disagreed claiming Shogun outstruck Machida in round one (19 to 11), round two (21 to 7), round three (19 to 14), round four (10 to 4), and round five (13-6). I don’t know what three of MMA’s most experienced judges were smoking the night of UFC 104, but I would wager it smelled of shenanigans.

Luckily for MMA fans and Shogun Rua, the Baldfather saw the fight a bit differently than the judges. He granted Shogun an immediate rematch. Rua won the rematch in such devastating fashion that Machida’s own father called for his son’s retirement.

Seth Falvo

Remember that scene from The Hurricane, where the black Rubin Carter beats the hell out of the white Joey Giardello, yet loses on the scorecards of the blatantly racist white judges? Yeah, it turns out that the real fight was nothing like that. At all. Not that that should surprise you. That scene displayed such over-the-top biases that I’d assume something like that could never happen in real life if I wasn’t familiar with Mariusz Pudzianowksi vs. James Thompson II.

It’s not that I want to believe that the outcome was predetermined; it’s just that literally everything about the completely unnecessary rematch leads me to that conclusion. The rematch was booked for KSW 17: Revenge — an event named by the least subtle person to ever work for the Polish MMA promotion. While Mariusz Pudzianowski was unsurprisingly the overwhelming fan favorite, his only significant offensive output was a jab he landed early in the second round. Meanwhile, Thompson landed numerous takedowns and punches from the mount and side control throughout the fight. Thompson dominated, yet Pudzianowski was still declared the winner by majority decision. While a terrible decision shouldn’t always lead one to believe the bout was a work, it doesn’t help that one of the judges’ scorecards looked like this. The hometown hero had earned his revenge — on paper, at least.

The fight has since been declared a no-contest due to miscommunication between the judges, who declared the bout a draw which should have warranted a sudden-death round, and the referee. Not that it matters. Even if the miscommunication never occurred, the sudden-death round was completely unnecessary. Thompson won easily and has nothing but a no-contest on his record to show for it. Fauh-king joooooooooke, indeed.

Jared Jones

Marcos Galvao may be the most cursed man in the history of decisions. For every gift Leonard Garcia is undeservedly given, three Christmas presents are stolen from beneath Galvao’s children in their sleep, metaphorically speaking. I would quote something about the yin and yang of life, but being that I was recently ostracized from my tree dwelling commune for urinating on one too many stray animals, I will save the liberal hippie analogy for another day.

The point is, Galvao’s fight with Joe Warren at Bellator 41 was the first time in recent memory that I actually believed the judges were paid off. Fresh off his damn-near-heroic comeback victory over Joe Soto, in which he snagged the Bellator Featherweight championship, self-proclaimed (aren’t they always?) “Baddest Man on the Planet” Joe Warren decided to make a run at the Bantamweight crown. Why he was set on trying to capture two titles before defending one is beyond me, but Warren figured he’d test the waters against journeyman Marcos Galvao in a 137-pound catchweight fight back at Bellator 41. Galvao, who was riding a three-fight win streak over mediocre competition, seemed like a perfect matchup for both Warren and Bellator to display the champ’s dominance. This idea has backfired on Bellator before, and it should have backfired on them on that cool April night.

The first round was close, but clearly Galvao’s, as Warren’s main offensive output consisted of attempting wild takedowns that succeeded in getting him mounted on more than one occasion. Perhaps that was the goal, but I can guaran-damn-tee his goal in the second round wasn’t to eat as many flying knees as humanly possibly, and yet that’s how it went down. The third was clearly Warren’s, but was nowhere near the 10-8 round he would have needed to walk away with a lucky draw. Despite all this, Warren would claim victory, and Galvao’s children would go hungry for another night, because the world can be a cold, unforgiving place. Though Warren would meet his maker in Alexis Vila shortly thereafter, Galvao would wind up on the wrong end of another bullshit decision against, you guessed it, Alexis Vila. Yin and Yang, folks.

Go ahead, TRY and throw some Fightmetric stats at me for the Warren/Galvao fight; it will be as pointless an argument as the one that tree-hugging tyrant Raiyne Thomas-Kirkpatrick-Gilligan and I had before I was kicked out of Serenity Gardens. Neither of us are going to change our ways, so we’d best just move along.

Did we leave out any good MMA robberies? Let us know *your* #1 pick in the comments section.