Tag: brian stann

Alexander Shlemenko Accuses UFC Fighters of Faking Injury, Mainly Brian Stann


(Jared Hamman attempts to pull a fast one on us all at UFC on FOX 4. AS IF we couldn’t tell that his leg was clearly photoshopped.) 

Perhaps two-time Bellator middleweight tournament winner Alexander Shlemenko is just a little bitter that rival Hector Lombard vacated his former promotion (and a long-awaited rematch with Shlemenko) to compete in the UFC, or maybe “Storm” is just as tired of seeing all of the UFC cards he is ordering turn to shit as the rest of us. Whatever his end game may be, Shlemenko recently stated in an interview with ValeTudo.ru that he believed many of the injuries that have been plaguing the UFC as of late were more than likely faked by the fighters in order to get out of a fight that was not a good matchup for them. His primary example was Brian Stann:

I can tell you for sure, 100%, I know why there are so many injuries. I personally find UFC fights not as exciting because of all those injuries. There are a lot of background tactics around who’s fighting who; fighters are trying really hard to have a good record in the UFC. If you’ve been offered to fight someone who’s considered a bad match-up, then it’s pretty easy to say ‘hey, I’m injured’.

For example, they offered Brian Stann to fight Hector Lombard. He got injured, and then the next thing you know – he’s fighting Michael Bisping. I can see the logic – for Brian Stann it makes more sense to fight Bisping, he’s simply more popular in the UFC than Hector Lombard. That’s why beating Bisping means more than beating Lombard, who’s a risky opponent.

You can fake every injury. Just tell [UFC doctors] about the symptoms and that’s it.

God Damn it, Alex. Your love of centrifugal forces and general badassery made you one of our favorite fighters, but NO ONE accuses “All American” of ducking a fight. And considering the bullshit-laden excuse your boy Lombard gave us three weeks after putting on one of the worst performances of the year, we’d say it’s a little presumptuous to start calling out other organizations fighters for sparing us a fifteen minute wet fart in advance.

After the jump: Stann’s response, as well as a video of Shlemenko’s most recent fight, which ends with an injury that is physically impossible to fake.


(Jared Hamman attempts to pull a fast one on us all at UFC on FOX 4. AS IF we couldn’t tell that his leg was clearly photoshopped.) 

Perhaps two-time Bellator middleweight tournament winner Alexander Shlemenko is just a little bitter that rival Hector Lombard vacated his former promotion (and a long-awaited rematch with Shlemenko) to compete in the UFC, or maybe “Storm” is just as tired of seeing all of the UFC cards he is ordering turn to shit as the rest of us. Whatever his end game may be, Shlemenko recently stated in an interview with ValeTudo.ru that he believed many of the injuries that have been plaguing the UFC as of late were more than likely faked by the fighters in order to get out of a fight that was not a good matchup for them. His primary example was Brian Stann:

I can tell you for sure, 100%, I know why there are so many injuries. I personally find UFC fights not as exciting because of all those injuries. There are a lot of background tactics around who’s fighting who; fighters are trying really hard to have a good record in the UFC. If you’ve been offered to fight someone who’s considered a bad match-up, then it’s pretty easy to say ‘hey, I’m injured’.

For example, they offered Brian Stann to fight Hector Lombard. He got injured, and then the next thing you know – he’s fighting Michael Bisping. I can see the logic – for Brian Stann it makes more sense to fight Bisping, he’s simply more popular in the UFC than Hector Lombard. That’s why beating Bisping means more than beating Lombard, who’s a risky opponent.

You can fake every injury. Just tell [UFC doctors] about the symptoms and that’s it.

God Damn it, Alex. Your love of centrifugal forces and general badassery made you one of our favorite fighters, but NO ONE accuses “All American” of ducking a fight. And considering the bullshit-laden excuse your boy Lombard gave us three weeks after putting on one of the worst performances of the year, we’d say it’s a little presumptuous to start calling out other organizations fighters for sparing us a fifteen minute wet fart in advance.

Per usual, Stann took the high road when responding to such an audacious claim on Twitter:

Shouldn’t even dignify todays comment w/ a response, but I would never fake an injury. I agreed to fight Hector b4 he was even signed. 

My injury was a 6-8 week recovery & the UFC was not interested in delaying his debut to wait for me. Fighters dont fake injuries, we have to pay the bills guys! 

Not too long ago, Elias attempted to decipher the reasoning behind the recent string of injuries the UFC has been facing, and concluded that more of the injuries could likely be written off as a result of strength training rather than intense sparring. And although Stann actually did injure his shoulder during a sparring session with UFC heavyweight Shawn Jordan, there is little reason to believe that he, along with most UFC fighters, would be willing to miss out on a paycheck to avoid a bad matchup. Most fighters live and die by the money they are able to come away with in the three or so fights they are able to squeeze in a year (if they’re lucky). And besides that, had Stann performed impressively against Lombard, it would have launched him onto the short list of contenders at 185, whereas a win over Bisping, while significant, would more or less confirm that “The Count” is simply not upper-echelon material. The Lombard fight was his to win, while the Bisping fight is mainly his to lose. Some of you will likely disagree with that notion, in which case I will tell thee to snuff it.

Speaking of injuries, Shlemenko was responsible for a nasty one in his unanimous decision win over Anthony Ruiz this past Saturday. Although Shlemenko didn’t exactly look his greatest, it was his first fight since getting into a car crash back in April, so we are willing to forgive him. Plus, he managed to smash Ruiz’s nose up something fierce, which is always fun to gawk at. On the Ryan McGillivray scale of broken noses, we’d give it about an 8.5.


(A good view of the carnage comes at 13:06, but FYI, Sensei Seagal and Oleg Taktarov make an appearance moments before. You’ll probably be excited to see at least one of them.) 

–J. Jones

Watching Fights With Dominick Cruz Is as Uncomfortably Intense as Actually Fighting Him [VIDEO]

(Props: YouTube.com/fueltv)

Dominick Cruz has that same condition Chuck Liddell has, where part of his brain automatically switches into “I’M FIGHTING” mode when he’s watching other people fight, and he begins to lose control of his body. Fuel TV has released a revealing pair of behind-the-scenes clips shot backstage during last Saturday’s Faber vs. Barao fight. In the first one, Cruz is pacing back and forth like Burt Watson just told him it’s time to roll. The sound of the interim bantamweight title fight being introduced is enough to give Dominick some painful flashbacks.

As you’ll see in the next clip (after the jump), Jon Anik and Brian Stann were at the other end of that hall the whole time, and God knows what they must have made of the pacing thing. Cruz and Stann break down the action, and unsurprisingly, Dominick is unable to stand still. You get the sense that Cruz was pulling for Urijah to win. Did he see something in Barao that spooked him, or did he just want another opportunity to beat up his old rival?


(Props: YouTube.com/fueltv)

Dominick Cruz has that same condition Chuck Liddell has, where part of his brain automatically switches into “I’M FIGHTING” mode when he’s watching other people fight, and he begins to lose control of his body. Fuel TV has released a revealing pair of behind-the-scenes clips shot backstage during last Saturday’s Faber vs. Barao fight. In the first one, Cruz is pacing back and forth like Burt Watson just told him it’s time to roll. The sound of the interim bantamweight title fight being introduced is enough to give Dominick some painful flashbacks.

As you’ll see in the next clip (after the jump), Jon Anik and Brian Stann were at the other end of that hall the whole time, and God knows what they must have made of the pacing thing. Cruz and Stann break down the action, and unsurprisingly, Dominick is unable to stand still. You get the sense that Cruz was pulling for Urijah to win. Did he see something in Barao that spooked him, or did he just want another opportunity to beat up his old rival?

Michael Bisping Asshole Quote of the Day: “No One Cares About Little Flyweights”


(“He didn’t mean it, Ian. Come on. You’re a star in my eyes, bro.” / Photo via Steve Mitchell/US PRESSWIRE)

Michael Bisping is an asshole. He’s a tremendous asshole, and he makes no apologies for it. Sometimes, his assholishness is undeniably entertaining — like when he recently described Hector Lombard as a “poison dwarf” whose mother smoked while she was pregnant. And sometimes he’s just a dick, straight up.

Case in point — at UFC 152 on September 22nd in Toronto, Bisping is fighting Brian Stann in a bout that could have title implications in the middleweight division. Technically, it’s the co-main event that night, supporting the UFC’s first-ever flyweight championship fight between Joseph Benavidez and Demetrious Johnson. (Whenever there’s a title match on a UFC card, it automatically gets main-event status, regardless of the relative popularity of those headliners compared to the card’s supporting players.) Anyway, here’s Bisping trying to sell his fight against Stann during an appearance on FuelTV on Saturday:

“In my opinion, and I think in most people’s, this is the main event. This is the real main event. Two big hard hitting guys. No one cares about little flyweights, this is the real main event, this is the real big fight, tune in cause someone’s getting knocked out, ain’t going to be me though.”


(“He didn’t mean it, Ian. Come on. You’re a star in my eyes, bro.” / Photo via Steve Mitchell/US PRESSWIRE)

Michael Bisping is an asshole. He’s a tremendous asshole, and he makes no apologies for it. Sometimes, his assholishness is undeniably entertaining — like when he recently described Hector Lombard as a “poison dwarf” whose mother smoked while she was pregnant. And sometimes he’s just a dick, straight up.

Case in point — at UFC 152 on September 22nd in Toronto, Bisping is fighting Brian Stann in a bout that could have title implications in the middleweight division. Technically, it’s the co-main event that night, supporting the UFC’s first-ever flyweight championship fight between Joseph Benavidez and Demetrious Johnson. (Whenever there’s a title match on a UFC card, it automatically gets main-event status, regardless of the relative popularity of those headliners compared to the card’s supporting players.) Anyway, here’s Bisping trying to sell his fight against Stann during an appearance on FuelTV on Saturday:

“In my opinion, and I think in most people’s, this is the main event. This is the real main event. Two big hard hitting guys. No one cares about little flyweights, this is the real main event, this is the real big fight, tune in cause someone’s getting knocked out, ain’t going to be me though.”

To say that “nobody” cares about “little” flyweights is both an exaggeration and a bit insulting. Some people do care about the 125-pound division, and having the two best flyweights in the world headline a pay-per-view is the kind of thing that UFC needs to do in order to build more interest in that weight class. (And yes Mike, you’re taller than Joseph and Demetrious; go ahead and pat yourself on the back.) Also, does Bisping really need to diminish other guys in the promotion in order to hype his own fight? I understand why he’d want to talk shit on Lombard, but publicly dissing the UFC’s newest weight division doesn’t do the company any favors from a business standpoint.

Then again…through his assholishness, Bisping manages to raise a valid point. Do all title fights deserve to get main-event status by default, when there are other fights on the card that would draw more attention? (Keep in mind that UFC 152 also features Rory MacDonald vs. BJ Penn, which is a more exciting matchup to me than Benavidez/Johnson or Bisping/Stann.)

Hardcore UFC fans will know that there are at least three interesting fights leading the UFC 152 lineup. But if you’re a casual fan and you just see “UFC 152: Benavidez vs. Johnson” on your cable listings, that probably won’t mean much to you — certainly not enough to shell out $55 on the spur of the moment. Like it or not, the main event has a significant impact on the overall interest level for a given card, and if that affects how many people turn out to see Michael Bisping fight Brian Stann, then the Count has a right to be salty about it.

What do you guys think? Does Benavidez vs. Johnson really deserve to be UFC 152′s main event? And when it comes to your interest level in MMA, how much does size matter?

CagePotato Presents: The State of the UFC’s Middleweight Division


(So, Anderson, who would *you* like to face next?) 

By Jared Jones

Let’s face it, the current state of the middleweight division is that of anarchy, a notion made all the more bewildering when you consider that it has been trapped beneath the crushing, totalitarian rule of the same king for the better part of a decade now. Yet somehow, it seems we can barely go a day without hearing that Vitor Belfort wants to fight so-and-so for the next title shot, or Michael Bisping wants to fight this guy for the right to do the same. Or that guy. Or that guy.

And indeed, the issue of solving who should rightfully receive the next beatdown shot at Anderson Silva is a tough one, dividing fans on a level that only TRT, vaseline, or Steven Seagal could match (scratch that, *no one* likes Sensei Seagal). Thankfully, CagePotato is here to clean up the mess instead of making it for once, so join us as we lay out in detail what must be done to organize the middleweight division’s long list of contenders in order of title shot worthiness (I swear to God I had something better for that). Feel free to debate this list if you want, but this is how it’s got to be.

On the Outside Looking In 

Michael Bisping

We know we like to poke fun at the guy, but in total seriousness, you’d have to be insane to believe that Bisping deserves a shot at the middleweight title. Yes, he is 4-1 in his past 5, as is the case for many of the UFC’s top middleweights, oddly enough. And yes, there’s little denying that Bisping has looked more tenacious and well rounded as of late than he ever has. But first, take a look at the names that make up his win streak. The biggest win he has under his belt in the past few years is Yoshihiro Akiyama, a 1-4 now welterweight who has been a complete bust in the UFC. Other than that, you have a now retired reality show host, a retired journeyman, and Dan Miller, who we absolutely refuse to say anything bad about.


(So, Anderson, who would *you* like to face next?) 

By Jared Jones

Let’s face it, the current state of the middleweight division is that of anarchy, a notion made all the more bewildering when you consider that it has been trapped beneath the crushing, totalitarian rule of the same king for the better part of a decade now. Yet somehow, it seems we can barely go a day without hearing that Vitor Belfort wants to fight so-and-so for the next title shot, or Michael Bisping wants to fight this guy for the right to do the same. Or that guy. Or that guy.

And indeed, the issue of solving who should rightfully receive the next beatdown shot at Anderson Silva is a tough one, dividing fans on a level that only TRT, vaseline, or Steven Seagal could match (scratch that, *no one* likes Sensei Seagal). Thankfully, CagePotato is here to clean up the mess instead of making it for once, so join us as we lay out in detail what must be done to organize the middleweight division’s long list of contenders in order of title shot worthiness (I swear to God I had something better for that). Feel free to debate this list if you want, but this is how it’s got to be.

On the Outside Looking In 

Michael Bisping

We know we like to poke fun at the guy, but in total seriousness, you’d have to be insane to believe that Bisping deserves a shot at the middleweight title. Yes, he is 4-1 in his past 5, as is the case for many of the UFC’s top middleweights, oddly enough. And yes, there’s little denying that Bisping has looked more tenacious and well rounded as of late than he ever has. But first, take a look at the names that make up his win streak. The biggest win he has under his belt in the past few years is Yoshihiro Akiyama, a 1-4 now welterweight who has been a complete bust in the UFC. Other than that, you have a now retired reality show host, a retired journeyman, and Dan Miller, who we absolutely refuse to say anything bad about.

But before you even scan through all of his past opponents, look at his last opponent. Regardless of how you scored the fight, Bisping did in fact lose to Chael Sonnen at UFC on FOX 2. To say that he would deserve a title shot with a lone victory over Brian Stann would be jumping the gun a little, don’t you think? Bisping needs to prove he can not only hang with, but defeat, at least a couple of the division’s top contenders before he should even be mentioned in the title picture by anyone but himself.

Brian Stann

A lot of what can be said for Bisping can arguably be said for Brian Stann, whose wins at middleweight, though impressive in execution, did not exactly come over a who’s who of the division either. Amidst wins over a two time promotional washout, a submission “specialist,” and the UFC’s punching bag, Stann’s biggest win is that of Chris Leben, which, while not a huge victory, is still more impressive than that of Akiyama these days.

The common link between these two is of course, Chael P. Sonnen. Stann was absolutely dominated by Sonnen from start to finish in their battle at UFC 136, stuck defending a rear-naked choke for a good deal of the first round and succumbing to an arm-triangle in the second. Bisping, on the other hand, was not only able to take Sonnen the distance, but lost a closely contested decision in doing so. Do their respective performances against Sonnen place one of them higher than the other? Absolutely not. The fact that these two were recently paired to throw down at UFC 152 is no coincidence, because they both stand on exactly the same ground, and are in need of not only a win on September 22nd, but at least one more high profile win before they get to call themselves top contenders

Chael Sonnen 

I can already hear the cries of “Anderson nuthugger” on the horizon, but if you know me at all, you know that I am a fan of Mr. Sonnen, despite his body’s inability to cash the checks that his mouth writes. That being said, we can only look into the rear-view mirror for so long, and although Sonnen’s performance against Silva at UFC 117 was nearly perfect, his performance at UFC 148 was anything but. We all know that the UFC could sell Sonnen/Silva III in its sleep, but the truth is, Sonnen simply needs a little time off to rest and recover.

His list of wins is easily the most impressive of anyone in this category, but with two losses to the champ, Sonnen finds himself in a similar position to that of Josh Koscheck. Could he beat most of his fellow contenders? Probably. Do most of us really think he stands a chance of beating Silva a third time around? Not really, but like I said, we would sure as hell watch him try again. But before Sonnen dusts off his plastic belt and starts making audacious claims about the people of Brazil, we think he needs at least a couple wins before he should be launched back up the middleweight rankings. For his return fight, perhaps he could face a guy like Mark Munoz, who was also recently knocked off the immediate contenders list. A win over Munoz, followed by a win over another contender, would easily warrant him a spot at the top once again.

Join us on page 2 for a look at the division’s upper-tier contenders…

Michael Bisping Gets his next Opponent for UFC 152. SPOILER: It’s Someone he Called Out.


ANOTHER SPOILER: It’s not Zeus, Neptune or the Kraken, either.

Okay, so the title of the article gives you no hints at all whatsoever on who Michael Bisping’s next opponent is. Given that Michael Bisping has been calling out seemingly every relevant middleweight, the title can be referring to any fighter that would make sense as an opponent for “The Count,” and even a few that wouldn’t. Big whoop, wanna fight about it?

Well, The Count now has an opponent in place for September 22’s UFC 152 in Toronto. Standing across the cage from Michael Bisping will be none other than Brian Stann.

When we last saw Stann in action, the former Marine made very quick work of Alessio Sakara at April’s UFC on FUEL TV 2, knocking him out two and a half minutes into their bout. Stann was then expected to welcome Bellator Middleweight Champion Hector Lombard to the UFC at August’s UFC on Fox 4, but a shoulder injury forced him off of the card. After being called out by none other than Michael Bisping, “The All-American” would accept Bisping’s callout on July 4th, which I’m sure has some kind of significance.


ANOTHER SPOILER: It’s not Zeus, Neptune or the Kraken, either.

Okay, so the title of the article gives you no hints at all whatsoever on who Michael Bisping’s next opponent is. Given that Michael Bisping has been calling out seemingly every relevant middleweight, the title can be referring to any fighter that would make sense as an opponent for “The Count,” and even a few that wouldn’t. Big whoop, wanna fight about it?

Well, The Count now has an opponent in place for September 22′s UFC 152 in Toronto. Standing across the cage from Michael Bisping will be none other than Brian Stann.

When we last saw Stann in action, the former Marine made very quick work of Alessio Sakara at April’s UFC on FUEL TV 2, knocking him out two and a half minutes into their bout. Stann was then expected to welcome Bellator Middleweight Champion Hector Lombard to the UFC at August’s UFC on Fox 4, but a shoulder injury forced him off of the card. After being called out by none other than Michael Bisping, “The All-American” would accept Bisping’s callout on July 4th, which I’m sure has some kind of significance.

Likewise, Michael Bisping is coming off of a unanimous decision loss at the hands of Chael Sonnen at UFC on Fox 2 in January. Bisping was expected to face Tim Boetsch at UFC 149, but fell victim to the UFC 149 injury curse.

While a victory for Stann would certainly put him “in the mix” at 185, a loss for Michael Bisping would more than likely keep him out of contention for the foreseeable future.  Losing two straight fights would already be enough to warrant a gatekeeper for his next fight, but seeing how Mayhem Miller is arguably the biggest name he’s defeated since his 2008 victory over Chris Leben, it’s doubtful he’d be getting another top contender any time soon.

In other UFC 152 booking news, the finale of the Flyweight Tournament will also take place at this event. Demetrious Johnson and Joseph Benavidez will be fighting for the right to be the first champion in the history of the UFC flyweight division. Barring any kind of mistake that forces a rematch, nothing can possibly go wrong, right?

The War of Independence Continues: Brian Stann Elects to Defend America from the Tyrannical Douchery of Michael Bisping

By George Shunick

There must be something about early July that gets Americans riled up at the British. This year it’s former Marine (not Army, as I mistakenly implied last time) Brian Stann who is ready to do battle with vile, pasty British person Michael Bisping. Ok, so if you want to get technical about it, Bisping kind of called out Stann first. Whatever. The point is that Stann is the latest in a long line of Americans who have stood against this insufferable British menace.

Now, I try not to devolve into hyperbole, but I think it’s safe to say that since his humiliating loss to Dan Henderson, Michael Bisping has had one thing on his mind – the destruction of America itself. Though presumably suffering through the devastating aftereffects of the H-Bomb, Bisping bided his time with a detour through a few Brazilians, where he met with mixed success. When he was ready, he returned to the rebellious colonies, determined to finish the war his forefathers had started centuries ago.

His first strike against Dan Miller went largely unnoticed; there was no reason to suspect Bisping would dare take any further action against America. Bisping then took on Japan’s Yoshiro Akiyama, which seemed to cement this theory – but is it a coincidence that Japan, Akiyama’s home country, is under the protection of American troops? I think not. Bisping became more brazen after this conquest, challenging Army veteran and Tim Kennedy training partner Jorge Rivera. Rivera admirably attempted to subvert the devious Brit’s diabolical scheme using psychological warfare, but it backfired in brutal fashion. Bisping was befuddled by Rivera’s tactics to the extent that he forgot the rule against kneeing the head of a downed opponent, leading to Rivera’s demise. Bisping also forgot common decency and sportsmanship, a staple of British culture from all accounts, and proceeded to spit at Rivera’s corner in the heated aftermath of the fight. Or he was never aware of them to begin with. Either way, his anti-American agenda was made clear.

By George Shunick

There must be something about early July that gets Americans riled up at the British. This year it’s former Marine (not Army, as I mistakenly implied last time) Brian Stann who is ready to do battle with vile, pasty British person Michael Bisping. Ok, so if you want to get technical about it, Bisping kind of called out Stann first. Whatever. The point is that Stann is the latest in a long line of Americans who have stood against this insufferable British menace.

Now, I try not to devolve into hyperbole, but I think it’s safe to say that since his humiliating loss to Dan Henderson, Michael Bisping has had one thing on his mind – the destruction of America itself. Though presumably suffering through the devastating aftereffects of the H-Bomb, Bisping bided his time with a detour through a few Brazilians, where he met with mixed success. When he was ready, he returned to the rebellious colonies, determined to finish the war his forefathers had started centuries ago.

His first strike against Dan Miller went largely unnoticed; there was no reason to suspect Bisping would dare take any further action against America. Bisping then took on Japan’s Yoshiro Akiyama, which seemed to cement this theory – but is it a coincidence that Japan, Akiyama’s home country, is under the protection of American troops? I think not. Bisping became more brazen after this conquest, challenging Army veteran and Tim Kennedy training partner Jorge Rivera. Rivera admirably attempted to subvert the devious Brit’s diabolical scheme using psychological warfare, but it backfired in brutal fashion. Bisping was befuddled by Rivera’s tactics to the extent that he forgot the rule against kneeing the head of a downed opponent, leading to Rivera’s demise. Bisping also forgot common decency and sportsmanship, a staple of British culture from all accounts, and proceeded to spit at Rivera’s corner in the heated aftermath of the fight. Or he was never aware of them to begin with. Either way, his anti-American agenda was made clear.

Bisping continued his campaign, this time embarrassing American reality TV host (and cagefighter) “Mayhem” Miller on the finale of a reality TV show. In conquering the most American of entertainment mediums, Bisping was poised to strike at the heart of America itself. Fortunately, the American Gangster himself, Chael P. Sonnen, scored a decisive victory over the villainous Count. However, “decisive victory” in this case refers to whatever is the exact opposite of that, as Bisping is convinced he won that fight. Bisping’s plans were merely delayed, and he has begun to mount a counteroffensive. But much as Britain reached too far when it attempted to reclaim its colonial possessions across the Atlantic, so too has Bisping bitten off more than he can chew in calling out Brian Stann.

Stann is the weapon America needs to defeat the menace that is Michael Bisping. Stann’s one weakness is the ground game. If he gets taken down, he’s in trouble. But have no fear, America, Bisping conveniently lacks the capability to bring the fight to the ground. Also conveniently, Bisping’s one observable weakness – getting hit in the face really fucking hard – happens to be somewhat of a specialty for Stann. Oh, and the fact that a brutal victory for Stann may help save the United States military’s sponsorship of the UFC is a nice touch.

While Bisping has already called out Alan Belcher – who accepted the challenge – it’s obvious which fight is far more compelling. So come on Joe Silva, let’s make Bisping vs. Stann happen. Not just for the fans but for America. Our independence doesn’t amount to squat so long as our fighters and people must suffer the malodorous douchery of Michael Bisping.