Tag: Corey Anderson

TUF 19 Finale Results: Frankie Edgar Destroys BJ Penn, Penn (Kind of?) Retires for the Umpteenth Time


(Photo via Getty)

The TUF 19 Finale headlined by BJ Penn vs. Frankie Edgar is now officially a candidate for saddest card of all time–not because of the entertainment value of the card, but because of what happened in the main event.

BJ Penn looked…old. He looked old, slow, and generally terrible. He came out with this bizarre, vertical stance reminiscent of a pose a non-fight fan would do if they were parodying a boxer. It looked really strange. Nor did it suit Penn’s style. His footwork couldn’t keep up with Edgar, nor could his hands. Edgar tagged Penn at will, and even managed to take the Hawaiian down at will. This was doubly depressing because Penn’s takedown defense used to be legendary. Eventually, Edgar landed a prolonged flurry of ground and pound in the third frame, prompting a stoppage.

BJ Penn didn’t fight like BJ Penn, and he admitted to it after the fight. He (rightly) stated he didn’t belong in the cage, and hinted he was going to retire.

But there were other important fights on the card–namely the TUF 19 finals.


(Photo via Getty)

The TUF 19 Finale headlined by BJ Penn vs. Frankie Edgar is now officially a candidate for saddest card of all time–not because of the entertainment value of the card, but because of what happened in the main event.

BJ Penn looked…old. He looked old, slow, and generally terrible. He came out with this bizarre, vertical stance reminiscent of a pose a non-fight fan would do if they were parodying a boxer. It looked really strange. Nor did it suit Penn’s style. His footwork couldn’t keep up with Edgar, nor could his hands. Edgar tagged Penn at will, and even managed to take the Hawaiian down at will. This was doubly depressing because Penn’s takedown defense used to be legendary. Eventually, Edgar landed a prolonged flurry of ground and pound in the third frame, prompting a stoppage.

BJ Penn didn’t fight like BJ Penn, and he admitted to it after the fight. He (rightly) stated he didn’t belong in the cage, and hinted he was going to retire.

But there were other important fights on the card–namely the TUF 19 finals.

In the middleweight final, Eddie Gordon ran through Dhiego Lima. To say he blitzed him would be an understatement. Gordon ran across the cage and started just bashing the shit out of Lima, who folded against the constant pressure. That’s honestly as technical as we can get. The fight was a pure beatdown, plain and simple.

We didn’t think a mugging like that could get more ferocious and violent…but then we watched Corey Anderson vs. Matt Van Buren. Anderson lived up to his ridiculous “Beastin’ 25/8″ nickname and beasted through Van Buren more dramatically than Gordon destroyed Lima!

Overall, it was a pretty entertaining night–a shame it had to end in such a disappointing yet entirely predictable way.

Here are the night’s complete results:

Main Card:

Frankie Edgar def. B.J. Penn via TKO (R3: 4:16)
Corey Anderson def. Matt Van Buren via TKO (R1: 1:01)
Eddie Gordon def. Dhiego Lima via TKO (R1: 1:11)
Derrick Lewis def. Guto Inocente via TKO (R1: 3:30)
Dustin Ortiz def. Justin Scoggins via split decision (29-28 28-29, 29-28)

Preliminary Card:

Kevin Lee def. Jesse Ronson via split decision (29-28, 28-29, 30-27)
Leandro Issa def. Jumabieke Tuerxun via submission (armbar) (R3, 3:49)
Adriano Martins def. Juan Manuel Puig via first-round KO (2:20)
Patrick Walsh def. Daniel Spohn via unanimous decision 29-28 X3
Sarah Moras def. Alexis Dufresne via unanimous decision (29-28, 29-28, 30-27)
Robert Drysdale def. Keith Berish via submission (rear-naked choke) (R1, 2:03)

Uh, Guys, You Might Want to Check Out What TUF 19 Finalist Corey Anderson’s Nickname Is

Ron “H20” Waterman. Justin “Nsane1” McCully. Jorge “The Naked Man” Ortiz. Just a few examples of why MMA fighters should never, ever be allowed to give themselves a nickname. And now, the latest and perhaps most tragic entry into the Bad Fighter Nickname Hall of Fame: TUF 19 finalist Corey “Beastin 25/8” Anderson.

I………………………..I just…………

Beastin 25/8. Beastin 25/8. I’ve said it aloud at least a dozen times already, placing emphasis on a different beat of the phrase each time, and I still haven’t cracked the code. Of all the combinations of all the words and numbers possible, he came up with fucking bee sting 25/8.

How have we allowed this to happen? I mean as, like, a collective species of likeminded individuals. I feel cold and ashamed and confused and cold and also ashamed.

Ron “H20″ Waterman. Justin “Nsane1″ McCully. Jorge “The Naked Man” Ortiz. Just a few examples of why MMA fighters should never, ever be allowed to give themselves a nickname. And now, the latest and perhaps most tragic entry into the Bad Fighter Nickname Hall of Fame: TUF 19 finalist Corey “Beastin 25/8″ Anderson.

I………………………..I just…………

Beastin 25/8. Beastin 25/8. I’ve said it aloud at least a dozen times already, placing emphasis on a different beat of the phrase each time, and I still haven’t cracked the code. Of all the combinations of all the words and numbers possible, he came up with fucking bee sting 25/8.

How have we allowed this to happen? I mean as, like, a collective species of likeminded individuals. I feel cold and ashamed and confused and cold and also ashamed.

There’s no way he’s always had that nickname, right? I know he’s only been competing a few years, but please, someone tell me that Corey Anderson has not been allowed to carry on with that nickname for this long.

Do you think Corey came up with it himself? Or do you think at some point during his training camp, one of his teammates saw him really cranking out those last few squats and was all like, “Man, you so tough, you don’t train 24/7, you train 25/8! You a beast, man!” and then Corey stopped dead in his tracks and was all “What did you just say?”

Can you imagine how Bruce Buffer is going to sound pronouncing this verbal diarrhea while channeling the power of Thor’s hammer with his voice? Do you think this will be the nickname that makes him finally crack and just burst out laughing like Steve Harvey on Family Fued? Bad enough Bruce is whoring out his vocal skills to set fighters voicemails these days, but now he has to be subjected to this?

Why, oh why have you forced me to rack my brain like this, Corey? Is this some kind of next level trolling, or did you serious think this was a snappy, original nickname? SOMEONE HELP ME UNDERSTAND THIS.

*********

I would just like to point out what several redditors already have, which is that Mr. Anderson’s nipples appear to have been photoshopped out and replaced with those of a pregnant steer. He also appears to have earned all 4 of his professional wins by neither submission, TKO, or decision, which says alot about his skillset as fighter. I almost want to root for him in his fight against whoever the other TUF 19 light heavyweight finalist is at the show’s finale this Sunday (?), but I simply can’t in good conscience.

Good luck, other TUF 19 finalist whose name I do not feel like looking up. I am in your corner.

–J. Jones