Jon Jones Injury Update: How It Happened, And Reactions From Daniel Cormier and Alexander Gustafsson


(“So grateful to have Alistair Overeem as a new teammate!! What a humble and hard-working individual” — Jon Jones on July 18th. Keep reading, this will become relevant soon.)

By now, you’ve surely heard that Jon Jones vs. Daniel Cormier has been postponed to January due to Bones suffering a torn left meniscus and sprained ankle in training on Monday. We should point out that these things happen all the time in MMA, and it’s nobody’s fault…but feel free to shake your little fists at Alistair Overeem. From a Sherdog report:

According to [Jones’s trainer Greg Jackson], the injury occurred while Jones was defending a takedown from UFC heavyweight talent Alistair Overeem during wrestling practice.

“It’s part of the game, it wasn’t like…somebody went for a flying kick and dislocated [something]. Somebody went for a takedown, [Jones] stepped the wrong way, twisted the wrong way and down he went. He was fighting it, and he just twisted it. And then it just popped,” Jackson said.

“Alistair’s maybe 240, Jon’s 220. It’s not like he was working with a giant moose. It was just one of those things.”

I’m sure Jackson’s right, but considering that Overeem previously left the Blackzilians team in the wake of allegations that he destroyed Guto Inocente’s knee out of frustration, it doesn’t reflect well on the Reem as a training partner.

As you can imagine, Jones’s rivals Daniel Cormier and Alexander Gustafsson have some opinions about the scrapped fight between Jones and DC. Short version: They’re not too psyched about it. First, here’s Cormier respectfully implying that Jones is a pussy…


(“So grateful to have Alistair Overeem as a new teammate!! What a humble and hard-working individual” — Jon Jones on July 18th. Keep reading, this will become relevant soon.)

By now, you’ve surely heard that Jon Jones vs. Daniel Cormier has been postponed to January due to Bones suffering a torn left meniscus and sprained ankle in training on Monday. We should point out that these things happen all the time in MMA, and it’s nobody’s fault…but feel free to shake your little fists at Alistair Overeem. From a Sherdog report:

According to [Jones’s trainer Greg Jackson], the injury occurred while Jones was defending a takedown from UFC heavyweight talent Alistair Overeem during wrestling practice.

“It’s part of the game, it wasn’t like…somebody went for a flying kick and dislocated [something]. Somebody went for a takedown, [Jones] stepped the wrong way, twisted the wrong way and down he went. He was fighting it, and he just twisted it. And then it just popped,” Jackson said.

“Alistair’s maybe 240, Jon’s 220. It’s not like he was working with a giant moose. It was just one of those things.”

I’m sure Jackson’s right, but considering that Overeem previously left the Blackzilians team in the wake of allegations that he destroyed Guto Inocente’s knee out of frustration, it doesn’t reflect well on the Reem as a training partner.

As you can imagine, Jones’s rivals Daniel Cormier and Alexander Gustafsson have some opinions about the scrapped fight between Jones and DC. Short version: They’re not too psyched about it. First, here’s Cormier respectfully implying that Jones is a pussy…

It’s very disappointing,” Cormier told MMAFighting.com. “I started to train very hard. It’s a little discouraging, but now I have time to get completely healthy. I don’t know how hurt Jon is but we have to remember that I took this fight with a pre-existing (knee) injury. I could have fought through it, I just wish he would have done the same.”

Cormier expanded on his thoughts during an appearance on FOX Sports 1′s America’s Pregame show yesterday:

“I’ll get a full training camp now,” Cormier said. “When I heard Jon was hurt, now him and Gustafssson are on the same schedule in order to be healthy. So my first question was, ‘I don’t have to go behind Gustafsson again now, right?’ And I was assured that it’s going to be me in January. He’s not going to take my place again…

“I said from the beginning that Jon Jones isn’t afraid of anyone,” Cormier said. “But if I can go in there with a partially torn ACL, I think he should have fought; tough it up and fight.

I don’t know the extent of his injuries, and if it’s really bad, I’ll take it back. But on the surface, I heard he hurt himself. But people hear ACL, they think you’re out for a year. I’ve been hurt, and I’ve been training. I wish he would have just fought.

I’m saying tough it out sometimes,” he added. “Sometimes you’ve got to go in there and tough it out and just fight…

I think people recognize that it’s a big fight,” he said. “I think by January, people will understand, and maybe people will stop thinking about us fighting on stage or getting caught cussing each other when the cameras were on.

You’ve got two of the best fighters in the world competing for the light heavyweight championship, so maybe it will let some of this time die down, people worrying about the stuff outside the cage and focus on the fact that in 37 fights, Jon Jones has not lost two rounds combined. But in terms of fan interest, people were excited about this fight, and I’m glad that they’re still going to get the fight.”

So, there’s a silver lining for Daniel Cormier. Meanwhile, Alexander Gustafsson is getting straight screwed. Keep in mind that Cormier was originally an injury replacement for Gustafsson, who had to withdraw from his rematch against Jones due to a knee injury of his own. Now that Jones and Gustafsson will be healthy again around the same time, shouldn’t the UFC go back to Plan A, and re-book Jones vs. Gustafsson? Well, of course not, because now everybody wants to see Jones and Cormier settle their feud.

“It was MY fight to begin with and I WANT the fight as the number 1 contender. End of story!!”, Gustafsson wrote on Facebook. “Apparently @ufc thinks that acting like clowns on a press conference will hype a fight more than doing the fight of the century, that’s ridiculous,” Gustafsson added.

Well, it’s reality. Instead of complaining on social media, maybe Gustafsson should start tossing publicists off a stage and throwing his shoes. That’ll get our attention.

Gustafsson’s next opponent and return date are TBA.

Pressing Pause: Can the Daniel Cormier vs. Jon Jones Fight Survive a Delay?

Being an MMA fan isn’t always easy. Nice things are few and far between. For every truly compelling fight such as like light heavyweight champion Jon Jones vs. Olympian Daniel Cormier, we get our share of random and pointless dreck, a culture informed …

Being an MMA fan isn’t always easy. Nice things are few and far between. For every truly compelling fight such as like light heavyweight champion Jon Jones vs. Olympian Daniel Cormier, we get our share of random and pointless dreck, a culture informed by the grossest misogyny imaginable and a dark cloud of steroid abuse that continues to linger over the entire sport.  

The fights keep us coming back for more, making the rest of it manageable. At its best MMA is about the triumph of the human will—about science and tactics combining with strength and courage in the most beautiful ways.

Top-level MMA contests between the most gifted and stubborn fighters on the planet represent competition in its purest form. It’s primal, ugly and magnificently regal, often in the span of just seconds. Nothing else comes close.

That’s why the announcement that an injured Jones has pulled out of his bout with Cormier hurt so much. There are a lot of MMA fights on television. Most of them are random displays of violence between anonymous competitors that either end spectacularly or drone on for a seemingly endless 15 minutes.

This was not going to be that fight.

Jones vs. Cormier was the best fight of the yearnot only athletically but as a spectacle. Jones, the first fighter who feels like a real-life professional athlete, is already the most dominant light heavyweight champion in UFC history. Cormier, an Olympic wrestler who has spent the last several years developing a surprisingly multifaceted striking game, was to be his greatest challenge. 

That alone was enough to sell the fight. Then magic happenedthe two spilling off a stage during a press conference staredown and rolling on the ground. The dustup was described as either bad for the sport, fake as can be or simply business as usual, depending on your source.

The brawl got people’s attention. The interviews that followed, both televised and live on a hot mic, kept it. Even non-fans like Deadspin’s Greg Howard were enthralled:

What makes this amazing is that neither fighter can see the other and they’re in separate rooms, so without the added stimuli, they’re both speaking rather pleasantly and calmly to one another while kind of staring into space. The conversation gets more and more tense without either man showing any signs of getting heated.

At one point, Cormier, sounding as exasperated as a substitute math teacher, said, “You are just terrible. You are the f*cking scum of the earth, you are a terrible human being, but you can sure turn it on, huh?”

“Thank you,” Jones said, inclining his head.

We were on the edge of our seats as a fandom, waiting to see what was going to happen next. For once, our mainstream brethren were sitting right beside us. And then the folding chair collapsedthe entire apparatus betraying us just when we needed it the most.

Like that, UFC 178, scheduled for September 27, has been irrevocably changed. It’s gone from a show likely to hit one million pay-per-view buys to one that will struggle to hit 100,000.

In boxing they’d cancel the event with the loss of the headliner like Jones, preferring to wait until the star was again ready to shine. In team sports the show would go on, with injuries and change built into the system long ago to make sure no one athlete could make or break any game. 

Only in MMA does the promotion simply bump up the next best thing, shrug its collective shoulders and hope for the best. 

The most appealing fight of 2014 has been replaced by Demetrious Johnson vs. Chris Cariaso. That’s the MMA equivalent of replacing a Mercedes with a Vespa. It’s fun to ride a Vespa, but there’s nothing quite like a Benz. And, while the official word is that we’ll get our Jones vs. Cormier fix next January, savvy fans know that in MMA “later” can become “never” with a painful suddenness. 

What will become of the fight, and the interest it engendered, is anyone’s guess. Bitter blood feuds between top fighters, believe it or not, are few and far between. There are, however, several precedents for how it might play out.

In the early days, as fighters first made their mark in the UFC, the hottest potential fight was between Ken Shamrock and Tank Abbott. The matchmakers wanted to see the fight in the worst way. Fans were equally enthused. Even the two men’s entourages were circling each other like packs of rabid dogs. 

“Ken had the Lion’s Den guys, and they were marching around. And Abbott had his guys, and they were marching around,” former UFC president David Isaacs told me in Total MMA. “You got the feeling if those guys turned the corner at the wrong time and stood there looking at each other it might get pretty hairy.”

At the Ultimate Ultimate 96, they were put on the same side of the bracket in an eight-man tournament. But when Shamrock broke his hand in his first fight against Brian Johnston, his night was through. He wouldn’t fight again for almost four years, leaving a dying sport for professional wrestling. When he finally returned, it was Abbott who was chasing big-time money in World Championship Wrestling. The dream of finally seeing the World’s Most Dangerous Man against Abbott was dead. 

Ten years later, little had changed. The hottest feud in the sport was Matt Serra vs. Matt Hughes. An improbable UFC welterweight champion, Serra had overcome both Georges St-Pierre and the odds to earn gold. Hughes, the former champion, was Serra’s polar opposite.

One was a Midwestern wrestler, twangy and cocky in a polite and old-fashioned way, the kind of fighter who made traditional sports writers smile; the other was a fast-talking New Yorker with a hot temper and a loud mouth. It was a combination that sent sparks flying on The Ultimate Fighter, both when Serra was a contestant on the show and later when the two men coached against each other in Season 6.

Fans were ready for the grudge match to end all grudge matches. 

Then a herniated disc forced Serra out of the Octagon and onto an MRI table. By the time the two finally met in the cage almost two years later, some of the energy had dissipated. Now in the co-main event spot, the fight became a middle-of-the-road performer for UFC at the box office. It was an opportunity lost.

More successful was another battle of TUF coaches, Rashad Evans and Quinton “Rampage” Jackson. Former light heavyweight champions and future Jones opponents, the two seemed to clash over matters large and small. It was a battle over no less than what it means to be a black man in MMA, and the timing couldn’t have been better—thanks to YouTube sensation Kimbo Slice, their season of The Ultimate Fighter was the most watched ever. 

Their showdown, set for UFC 107 in Jackson’s hometown of Memphis, Tennessee, promised to be one of the most exciting bouts in UFC history. But when Hollywood called in the form of B.A. Baracus, a role popularized by the iconic Mr. T, Jackson jumped at the opportunity.

The A-Team was in. The UFC was out. It was a decision, he says, that has haunted his career ever since.

“I was wrong, I did the movie instead of fighting Rashad (Evans) in Memphis. I admit I was wrong for doing that, but I had to do it,” Jackson told Bleacher Report. “That killed our relationship, and nothing went right after that.”

Still, when the two finally got around to business five months after their originally scheduled dance, the crowd stuck with them. At least until the bell rang. That’s when the expected grudge match became a tactical struggle instead. Yahoo’s Kevin Iole was not impressed

The fight was a letdown after literally months of over-the-top trash talking from both men. It was a tactical, technical affair that would have been a perfectly acceptable match had it been stuck in the middle of a card somewhere.

After all the trash these men talked, through a season of “The Ultimate Fighter,” three episodes of a preview show, during a circus-like conference call, throughout innumerable media appearances and on their personal Twitter accounts, Evans’ unanimous decision before a sellout crowd of 15,081 at the MGM Grand Garden Arena on Saturday was clearly a letdown.

While the fight was no barnburner, for our purposes here that hardly matters. It survived a delay whereas Serra vs. Hughes did not, in part because pressing pause didn’t make the underlying issues disappear. Nor was the time off significant enough to change fans’ perceptions of either man. 

On January 3, Cormier will still be Jones’ most significant challenge to date. He will still be the best wrestler in MMA, still train with the best heavyweight in MMA in Cain Velasquez and still hate Jones with a burning passion. 

Likewise, on January 3, Jones will still be a genetic freak. He will still be the meanest and smartest fighter in the sport. He will still be looking to cement his legacy as the best to ever step in the Octagon. 

This fight doesn’t get worse with age—it gets better. Jones will be healthy. Cormier will have a chance to put in a full training camp. Both will have plenty of time to let every insult simmer in their souls.

No, Jones vs. Cormier won’t be able to save UFC’s dismal 2014 on pay-per-view. But it will be a heck of a way to jump-start 2015.

Read more MMA news on BleacherReport.com

Daniel Cormier Comments on Canceled Fight with Jon Jones

Daniel Cormier is going to have to wait awhile to get his hands on Jon Jones.
While the former Olympic wrestler-turned-mixed martial artist and the reigning light heavyweight king were set to collide at UFC 178 on Sept. 27, “Bones” suffered an injury d…

Daniel Cormier is going to have to wait awhile to get his hands on Jon Jones.

While the former Olympic wrestler-turned-mixed martial artist and the reigning light heavyweight king were set to collide at UFC 178 on Sept. 27, “Bones” suffered an injury during training camp and was forced to withdraw from the fight. The news broke Tuesday on Fox Sports 1, and this turn of events puts the freeze on some serious heat built up between the two fighters as of late.

Last week during a two-city press tour for their showdown in Las Vegas, Jones and Cormier came to blows during a routine faceoff. The scuffle dominated headlines across the MMA media landscape and instantly made their upcoming 205-pound title tilt the most anticipated fight of the year.

Yet, with Jones now nursing an injury and the fight projected to be pushed back to UFC 182 on Jan. 3, the hottest scrap of the year lost its pulse for the time being.

And while “D.C.” is undoubtedly disappointed, he believes the bout being delayed will hopefully help put fans’ perspective on what will happen inside the cage and not the grudge that exists between the two men on the outside. 

Following the report of Jones’ injury, the AKA staple talked to America’s Pregame about having to wait to have his shot at the pound-for-pound great.

I think people recognize that it’s a big fight. I think by January, people will understand, and maybe people will stop thinking about us fighting on stage or getting caught cussing each other when the cameras were on.

“You’ve got two of the best fighters in the world competing for the light heavyweight championship, so maybe it will let some of this time die down, people worrying about the stuff outside the cage and focus on the fact that in 37 fights, Jon Jones has not lost two rounds combined. But in terms of fan interest, people were excited about this fight, and I’m glad that they’re still going to get the fight.

In addition to the matchup being off the radar for awhile, the rescheduling will also give Cormier time to give some attention to a lingering knee injury.

Following his dominant win over Dan Henderson back in May, the Louisiana native revealed he had been dealing with a partially torn ACL that he was going to have surgically repaired when the next shot at the light heavyweight title was going to Alexander Gustafsson. But “The Mauler” suffered an injury of his own and was forced out of his rematch with Jones, which caused the UFC to tap the former heavyweight-turned-205-pound contender.

With his long-awaited title shot now in hand, the 35-year-old decided to put off the corrective surgery until after his bout with Jones because the scheduled recovery time would keep him from competing on Jan. 3. 

Outside of his own physical situation, upon hearing the news of Jones’ injury, Cormier was concerned the Swedish striker would jump back in to replace him in the title picture. Yet, once the UFC brass confirmed this was not to be the case, Cormier turned his thoughts to wishing the current champion would have battled through the injury and toughed it out to face him.

I would be outside of myself to not say I went into this fight knowing my knee was pretty jacked up, and I was going to fight through it to get a title. I’ll get a full training camp now. When I heard Jon was hurt, now him and Gustafsson are on the same schedule in order to be healthy. So my first question was, ‘I don’t have to go behind Gustafsson again now, right?’ And I was assured that it’s going to be me in January. He’s not going to take my place again.”

“I don’t know the extent of his injuries, and if it’s really bad, I’ll take it back. But on the surface, I heard he hurt himself. But people hear ACL, they think you’re out for a year. I’ve been hurt, and I’ve been training. I wish he would have just fought. I’m saying tough it out sometimes. Sometimes you’ve got to go in there and tough it out and just fight.

  

Duane Finley is a featured columnist for Bleacher Report. All quotes are obtained firsthand unless noted otherwise. 

Read more MMA news on BleacherReport.com

Jon Jones Injures Leg, Fight With Daniel Cormier Moved to UFC 182 on January 3rd [FUUUUUUUUUUCK]


(Yeah, “postponed.” Like we don’t all know what that really means.)

Let’s be honest, the past 24 hours have been nothing short of miserable for us. And by “us” I mean, like, humanity. It has been a day that saw beloved actor/comedian Robin Williams pass and woman-beating piece of shit War Machine (see also: Oden, G) continue to sit somewhere inhaling air (Canada, maybe?). It was a day which all but confirmed that atheism is the right way to go. And now, this bullshit.

Thanks to an ill-timed “leg injury” (that is being reported as everything from a torn meniscus to a sprained ankle, or possibly both), Jon Jones has been forced out of his UFC 178 main event title fight with Daniel Cormier. As a result, the fight has been moved to UFC 182 at the MGM Grand on January 3rd.

Taking the place of Jones vs. Cormier in the main event of UFC 178 will be Demetrious Johnson‘s flyweight title fight against Chris Cariaso, which if you recall, was originally booked as the *co* main event of UFC 177. In one fell swoop, UFC 178’s estimated pay-per-view buys have gone from 1 million+ guaranteed to 250k if it’s lucky. But I can’t wait to see how the UFC tries to sell me this one as worthy of $60 (Hint: It rhymes with Conor McGregor. It’s Conor McGregor.)

No word yet if Jones’ injury is a delayed reaction from getting hit by Cormier’s *other* shoe as I speculate, but one thing’s for sure: Bones won’t be literally killing anyone anytime soon.

We’ll update you on this story as it develops.

J. Jones


(Yeah, “postponed.” Like we don’t all know what that really means.)

Let’s be honest, the past 24 hours have been nothing short of miserable for us. And by “us” I mean, like, humanity. It has been a day that saw beloved actor/comedian Robin Williams pass and woman-beating piece of shit War Machine (see also: Oden, G) continue to sit somewhere inhaling air (Canada, maybe?). It was a day which all but confirmed that atheism is the right way to go. And now, this bullshit.

Thanks to an ill-timed “leg injury” (that is being reported as everything from a torn meniscus to a sprained ankle, or possibly both), Jon Jones has been forced out of his UFC 178 main event title fight with Daniel Cormier. As a result, the fight has been moved to UFC 182 at the MGM Grand on January 3rd.

Taking the place of Jones vs. Cormier in the main event of UFC 178 will be Demetrious Johnson‘s flyweight title fight against Chris Cariaso, which if you recall, was originally booked as the *co* main event of UFC 177. In one fell swoop, UFC 178′s estimated pay-per-view buys have gone from 1 million+ guaranteed to 250k if it’s lucky. But I can’t wait to see how the UFC tries to sell me this one as worthy of $60 (Hint: It rhymes with Conor McGregor. It’s Conor McGregor.)

No word yet if Jones’ injury is a delayed reaction from getting hit by Cormier’s *other* shoe as I speculate, but one thing’s for sure: Bones won’t be literally killing anyone anytime soon.

We’ll update you on this story as it develops.

J. Jones

Jon Jones Uncensored: Why the Reserved UFC Champ Is Suddenly Losing His Cool

For my money, the best part of last week’s instantly infamous off-air SportsCenter squabble between Jon Jones and Daniel Cormier comes before either of them even utters a word.
The death threats and trash talk are fine—to borrow a phrase fr…

For my money, the best part of last week’s instantly infamous off-air SportsCenter squabble between Jon Jones and Daniel Cormier comes before either of them even utters a word.

The death threats and trash talk are fine—to borrow a phrase from Nick Diaz, it’s whatever—but the truly golden moment of this exchange emerges the instant Jones decides he’s going to go in on Cormier. You can see it as he fiddles his earpiece into place, a little grin creeping across his face before he opens his mouth and says: “Hey p—y, are you still there?”

And for a moment even Cormier has to laugh.

Whether Jones knew this recording would eventually become public or not, that one mischievous half smile tells us everything we need to know about how the light heavyweight champion is approaching this fight. With their mega-bout looming at UFC 178 on Sept. 27, it’s no accident the notoriously aloof Jones is picking this moment to abruptly lose his cool.

After spending years carefully painting a picture of himself as reserved and overly calculated, the Octagon’s 27-year-old fighting genius is suddenly throwing UFC PR reps through press conference sets in his haste to get to Cormier.

A guy who historically has been loath to even look his opponents in the eye during staredowns is suddenly eager to get all up in this one’s personal space, provoking on-stage brawls—shoes thrown, cellphones lost—and leaving the world to pick through the footage like it’s the Zapruder film.

This guy who normally greets his foes’ feeble prefight jousts with a shrug and a knowing sigh is suddenly off the rails. He’s tossed out his own playbook, or is at least significantly rewriting it in an effort to sell this fight or get in Cormier’s head—or a combination of both.

It’s a jarring contrast to the cloying, self-righteous Jones who more often than not has rubbed a lot of MMA fans the wrong way since winning the title in March 2011, but it’s not completely unexpected either.

Back in April, I noted that Jones appeared to be coming out of his shell a bit. In the wake of his easy-peasy victory over Glover Teixeira at UFC 172, he’d begun mocking the haters in Instagram videos he posted and quickly deleted. You could still see him carefully parsing his answers in interviews, but cracks were starting to show around the edges of his carefully constructed public persona.

Soon after Cormier was announced as a replacement for the injured Alexander Gustafsson last month, those cracks became gushers.

Jones turned a corner from sly, simpering backbiting to unabashed verbal warfare. While it seems off-base to say the champion has “gone full heel” (as is the unfortunate parlance of our times), it’s obvious he’s made the conscious choice to get in Cormier’s face—both literally and figuratively—in a way we’ve not seen leading up to his previous fights.

Granted, these two have history, and Cormier specifically called Jones out after a victory over Dan Henderson at UFC 173, but it feels like there is more at work here than simple bad blood or straightforward dollars and cents. Considering how exacting Jones has been thus far in his career, it seems unlikely he’d go as far as a public brawl just to prop up a pay-per-view buyrate or teach Cormier who’s boss.

Jones is nothing if not conscious of his bottom line, but I doubt he’d risk all the work he’s put into his image—not to mention those high-profile Nike and Gatorade sponsorships—simply because he and DC don’t like each other.

No, something else is obviously going on.

Perhaps for the first time in Jones’ six-year UFC career we’re seeing how he reacts when he feels threatened.

When he feels nervous.

It’s likely Jones knows as well as we all do that this Cormier fight is special. Provided the challenger’s injured knee is as much of a non-issue as he says it is, he shapes up as not only Jones’ most lucrative fight as 205-pound champion, but his toughest test as well.

So far, Jones has manhandled nearly all of his light heavyweight opponents while barely breaking a sweat. He had a close call against Gustafsson last September but had approached their rematch with a confidence that said it wouldn’t be nearly as close the second time around.

Cormier, though, is a different animal. This is a guy who spent the first 13 fights of his undefeated career blowing past heavyweights. This is a guy who picked up Josh Barnett and body-slammed him. This is a guy whose Olympic wrestling credentials are a world beyond what Jones accomplished as a junior college All-American.

Jones is the top pound-for-pound fighter in the world for a reason, and it seems inconceivable that he would ever get outgunned in a 205-pound fight. But if you were going to dream up a current fighter who might be able to give him a run for his money, it would be a healthy, well-prepared Cormier.

It could be that Jones shifting into ultra alpha-male mode leading up to this fight is a product of his feeling vulnerable by Cormier’s sudden entry into the division.

In any case, what we’re seeing now is a beefed-up, edgier version of Bones we’ve never witnessed before, at least in public. In fact, it feels as though he’s finally showing us the guy he’d taken such pains to hide all those years.

Perhaps—if we’re very lucky—these next couple of months will reveal more than we thought we’d ever get to know about the guarded pound-for-pound great.

We might even get to see him sweat.

Read more MMA news on BleacherReport.com

Martial Arts Fail of the Week: Smear Shit on Yourself to Prevent Rape

Rape prevention is a serious topic and a noble endeavor but the guys in this video have pretty much no clue about it.

Many of the techniques are “street” techniques that simply assume someone is going to let you eye gouge them or hit them in the balls without doing anything–like they’ll just stand there and let you do it. To quote Daniel Cormier, “Do you think I’m just gonna sit there and let you kill me?

Anyway, these guys are basically peddling martial arts snake oil–or snake excrement. That’s right, shitting and pissing yourself is among the techniques they advocate. They also suggest rubbing shit on your arms and on your face, a Martial Arts Fail of the Week first.

Get a rundown of who these guys are (and what popular movie one of them was in) after the jump.

Rape prevention is a serious topic and a noble endeavor but the guys in this video have pretty much no clue about it.

Many of the techniques are “street” techniques that simply assume someone is going to let you eye gouge them or hit them in the balls without doing anything–like they’ll just stand there and let you do it. To quote Daniel Cormier, “Do you think I’m just gonna sit there and let you kill me?

Anyway, these guys are basically peddling martial arts snake oil–or snake excrement. That’s right, shitting and pissing yourself is among the techniques they advocate. They also suggest rubbing shit on your arms and on your face, a Martial Arts Fail of the Week first.

The knee-jerk reaction is “You know what? That’d probably work!” Well it might if you had the time to pull your pants down, shit into your hands, and then rub it on yourself. If somebody suddenly jumps you, it’s hard to do all that. You can shit yourself, though.

These guys also claim burping and farting are legit techniques.

Oh, and “these guys” are Lou Casamassa’s Red Dragon Karate (what an original name). Lou Casamassa is a 10th degree black belt in karate and the founder of the American Karate Kung Fu Federation. He claims to have used “Yankee ingenuity” to combine the 7 greatest martial arts into his Red Dragon Karate style. Ugh.

Funnily enough, his son–Chris Casamassa–was actually Scorpion in the first Mortal Kombat movie. You know what else he was in? WMAC MASTERS! His nickname was “Red Dragon,” no doubt an homage to his father’s style. Remember WMAC Masters?

A shame Casamassa didn’t smear shit all over himself on the show. That would’ve driven ratings through the fucking roof. The ENTIRE FIRST SEASON of the show is on YouTube. We highly suggest you watch it because it’s incredibly terrible–so terrible it’s great.

By the way, thanks to Josh S. for sending us this week’s video.

If you see any video that’s good (or bad) enough to make the cut, let us know! Send it to [email protected].