Tag: Fantasy

Hello fight fans and welcome to the first annual Fighters Creed MMA Awards, presented by Fighters Creed! Here is a list of the eight fights that earned prestigious titles and will go down in MMA history!

Each moment has been recapped in stunning detail and listed below! Be sure to vote for “Best in Show” in our poll!

*This is purely a fictitious account of fights. All have been made up for comedic and entertainment purposes only and in no way represent any personal or general negative implications of the fighters or persons named. This list is in no affiliation with other awards.

Enjoy! 

 

Award for “Best Closing of the Distance”

Winner: Stefan Struve vs. Demetrious Johnson

This fight was nearly three rounds of intense cat-and-mouse chasing, except the mouse was chasing the cat.

Demetrious continued battering at the shins of the “Skyscraper” in the second round. Near the end of the that round, Johnson went in for a single-leg takedown. Struve held his ground while Johnson went for an inverted kneebar, but the round ended seconds later.

In the third round, Struve used his reach advantage to place his hand on top of Johnson’s head and keep his distance, but Demetrious ran up Struve’s arm, took his back, slapped on a rear naked choke, and tapped out the Skyscraper.

“Mighty Mouse” wins Submission of the Night. 

 

Award for “Most Referee Timeouts in One Fight”

Winner: Clay Guida vs. Urijah Faber

The first round starts and both fighters touch gloves. Clay immediately goes for a clinch and starts to dirty box.

Urijah Faber’s cornrows become undone, and his full mane is now down. Clay Guida goes in for another close exchange, but his hair gets tangled with Faber’s. Referee Herb Dean stops the fight and fixes the hair.

Thirty seconds later, it happens again, this time on the ground. Herb Dean stands them up, and fixes it again. This continues in the second round.

Then they both go for a violent takedown simultaneously and get tangled again. Herb Dean assesses the situation and calls in Stitch to cut the hair apart.

The third round starts and it happens again. Herb Dean rushes in again, but gets his own hair stuck. Doctors stop the fight, and judges call it a three-way draw. Herb Dean is awarded Fight of the Night. 

 

Award for “Overcoming Adversity”

Winner: Frankie Edgar vs. Roy Nelson 

Frankie starts off his fight with some quick jabs. Roy Nelson takes the punches, but eats them only to setup a takedown.

He quickly grabs a double-leg using his right arm only and slams Edgar to the ground. Edgar is rocked by the slam, and while dazed, Nelson scrambles and puts Edgar into a crucifix.

Edgar manages to squirm enough to dodge Nelson’s attacks from above. He then gets Roy into side control, but loses it again.

The second round starts and Roy Nelson takes Frankie down. This time he goes immediately to the north-south position. Edgar starts making a waving motion and loses his mouth guard, so referee Herb Dean calls a timeout. He stands both of them up, returns the mouth guard to Frankie, and then tells him to go back down to the position they were just in. Frankie clearly begs Herb Dean to just stand them up, but the ref refuses and places them back the way they were.

Frankie has now endured this torture for almost two rounds, but miraculously he lifts Roy Nelson off of himself. He then proceeds to suplex Nelson and knock him out for KO of the Night and Fight of the Night.

Edgar later says that his adrenaline boost came as a result of Nelson talking trash about the Jersey Shore while he had Edgar pinned. 

 

Award for “Quickest Knockout”

Winner: Mirko Cro Cop vs. Wanderlei Silva

The bout starts and both opponents rush toward each other, meeting in the middle.

Mirko Cro Cop throws a jumping, 360 roundhouse and knocks out “The Axe Murderer” in six seconds.

After the fight doctors attempt to reattach Silva’s nose. Meanwhile Cro Cop is interviewed by Joe Rogan, where he reveals that he has been training with Steven Seagal. 

 

Award for “Fewest Number of Takedowns in a Single Fight”

Winner: Fabricio Werdum vs. Thales Leites

The fight starts and both men touch gloves. They then square off and circle each other for about 20 seconds.

All of sudden, they both fake charge at each other, and in unison, they fall on their backs.

As if tanning under the lights of Mandalay Bay Arena, the fighters refuse to move. They bait each other by kicking at each other’s in-steps from time to time before Herb Dean stands them up.

The second and third rounds continue in the same manner as the first.

Judges call it a draw, and a rematch is setup immediately by Joe Silva. The fight will be the main event, and GSP vs. Silva is its co-main. 

 

Award for “Most Disgusting Fight”

Winner: Mark Hominick vs. Dwayne Lewis

The fighters start the fight off by trading blows over and over. Lewis throws a head kick and lands flush to Hominick’s forehead. Hominick responds with a quick superman punch to the eye of Lewis.

Jabs and elbows are exchanged until hematomas have fully formed on both fighters.

In the second round, both fighters go for a quick takedown at the exact same time, causing their faces to smash together.

Joe Rogan’s commentary is briefly interrupted by a loud popping sound. Referee Herb Dean calls a stop to the fight, and corner and cut men rushed in to fix their fighters and the mess.

During the panic, six full bags of ice are spilled. Arianny Celeste slips on the ice that had been swept to the sides, which leads to her falling on her head rendering herself unconscious.

Both fighters are awarded KO of the Night, and Joe Rogan receives an Emmy for his commentary. 

 

Award for “Most Artistic Fight”

Winner: Jason Miller vs. Hermes Franca

The fight starts, and it immediately goes to the ground.

The two fighters scramble for positions, reversing each other and exchanging ground and pound. The sweat and Vaseline converge into their hair, and the dye begins to bleed out by the start of the second round.

The canvas is becoming a rainbow of current and past colors, rendering the sponsors unreadable.

By the end, the mat looks like the insides of a kaleidoscope. Dan Hardy jumps the cage and makes some final touchups. 

 

Award for “Most Memorable Entrance”

Winner: Georges St. Pierre vs. Ronaldo “Jacare” Souza

Entrance music starts and Souza comes into “Welcome to the Jungle.”

Lights dim again and “O Canada” starts to play. Suddenly, a spotlight hits St. Pierre, and he is coming to the cage riding a gigantic moose.

He parks the moose at the prep station, while they apply Maple Syrup Vaseline to Rush’s face. He then enters the cage.

The fight starts, and GSP starts to jab. Souza, being frustrated with the quickness of GSP, lunges all out for a superman punch. He lands flush, and GSP gets rocked. Seeing his companion in trouble, GSP’s moose decides to jump the cage.

In the wake of excitement, Brock Lesnar, who was lazily spectating, perks up. He reaches for his hunting rifle, grabs the ammo under his chair, and takes aim.

He lands a shot dead center of the moose’s head, killing it on the spot. Lesnar, too, jumps the cage and starts to tend to his recent kill.

Confused and thinking GSP would be disqualified, Souza believes he has won the fight and starts to do his signature crawl.

Lesnar turns around and sees this, panics, and shoots Souza, thinking he was a caiman.

GSP is awarded a win, due to Souza being unable to continue.

Fans and critics rejoice…GSP has finally broken his decision streak. 

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