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Exclusive: Bellator’s Jessica Pene Doesn’t Need a Gimmick to Kick Your Ass

(Photo courtesy of Michael Castillo)
By CagePotato contributor DL Richardson
It seems we expect female fighters to fall into one of a few archetypes, and we want to know what we’re dealing with as soon as we hear her name announced. “Th…

(Photo courtesy of Michael Castillo)

By CagePotato contributor DL Richardson

It seems we expect female fighters to fall into one of a few archetypes, and we want to know what we’re dealing with as soon as we hear her name announced. “The Karate Hottie.” “Crazy Bitch.” “Beauty but the Beast.” “Cyborg.” But what happens when you meet a fighter who doesn’t fit neatly into these pre-formed notions? How do you reconcile the image of a fighter who dotes on her Staffordshire terrier and professes love for the movies Labyrinth and Stardust with the image of a professional kicker of asses and taker of names? Stalking could lead to some interesting revelations about a person’s habits and character, but it could also land you in traction. Easier route: call her and ask her a bunch of questions. Meet Jessica Pene, a participant in Bellator’s upcoming 115-pound women’s tournament who enjoys working with children, long walks on the beach, and subbing dudes forty pounds heavier than she is.

Ask Jessica Pene about her favorite fighter, and she’ll mention a handful of names. She expresses interest in “old school” fighters like Fedor Emelianenko, members of the new wave of MMA like Gegard Mousasi, and female division standouts like Megumi Fujii. One name, though, comes up repeatedly: “I love watching BJ Penn fight,” she says, perhaps unaware of the parallels between them.

Like Penn, Pene doesn’t have to fight to pay the bills. Born to a white collar family in southern California, Pene could have cruised through life, gotten a degree at a university and moved on to a cushy job. With her good looks and quiet charm, Jessica Pene could have made good money in advertising or public relations, and never once had to worry about making weight, defending a takedown, or getting punched in the face. Pene wakes and trains when most of us are still asleep, not because she needs to put food on the table, but because she is and always has been athletically inclined. Like Penn, she doesn’t compete because she needs a big payday. Jessica Pene fights because, deep down, she’s a fighter.

The 7 Worst Predictions in CagePotato History

As the saying goes, "Men make MMA predictions and God laughs." With that in mind, let’s revisit some of the most classic blunders in CP history, in chronological order. Good thing we’re completely unaccountable for the things we say here…

From: "Gambling Addiction Enabler: UFC 84 Edition" (The very first installment of the G.A.E.)
BG said: "Look, we know the Axe Murderer was a killer in PRIDE — but he needs to win a couple in the Octagon to convince me that he’s just as fearsome over here. Take away the use of soccer kicks and knees to the head on the ground, biased refs and judges, matchmaking that had him go up against opponents that were tailor-made for his style, (*cough*steroids*cough*), and the confidence that comes from never losing, and we’re not even talking about the same guy anymore. Silva won’t be doing any axe-murdering at UFC 84 — he’s going to be fighting not to lose, and will come out a much more cautious, tentative version of himself. Meanwhile, Jardine is surely working on another great game-plan with Greg Jackson, knowing that if he pulls off another big win his title shot will be waiting."
What happened: Wanderlei Silva via KO (rape choke), 0:36 of round 1. LOL @ Jardine’s "title shot."

From: "UFC 85: Bedlam — Ipecac Rematch Picks" (this article seems to have disappeared from the Internet; you can check out a screen-shot from my Google Reader here, and a little bit of backstory here.)
BG said: "Matt Hughes may be on the decline, and Thiago Alves is definitely on the come-up, but they haven’t passed each other yet, so to speak. Though Alves caught Karo Parisyan at UFC Fight Night 13, he’s failed in previous big tests against Spencer Fisher and Jon Fitch. Hughes may have trouble with Alves’s striking and youthful energy, and a submission victory is unlikely, but I can see the future Hall of Famer dominating the young challenger with his wrestling and grinding out a decision."
What happened: Matt Hughes got utterly ruined by the Pitbull’s striking and youthful energy; Alves via TKO, 1:02 of round 2. I lost bragging rights to Fightlinker, as well as the entire contents of my stomach.

GOOOOD MORNING, POTATO NATION! It’s Time for Episode 3 of The Bum Rush Radio Show

(Goldstein during his Taxi Driver phase.)
If you’re looking for something to help you cruise into the weekend, we’ve got you covered. Episode 3 of "The Bum Rush" features more of our terribly inaccurate fight predictions, an insider rou…

(Goldstein during his Taxi Driver phase.)

If you’re looking for something to help you cruise into the weekend, we’ve got you covered. Episode 3 of "The Bum Rush" features more of our terribly inaccurate fight predictions, an insider round table featuring the usual suspects: Ben, Mike, Chad and Chad’s hype man, ReX13 discussing current MMA news and last weekend’s UFC card and an interview with UFC 116 slam master, Gerald Harris.

Find a cold, dark corner to hide in and keep your laughter to a minimum and you may be able to avoid your boss long enough to get through this damn thing.

As always, your input is appreciated. Let us know who you want to hear on the show, what we’re doing mediocrely and what areas we need to step up our games in.

We’re working to get the show on iTunes by next episode to make it more easily accessible and to make it at least seem more legit.

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD EPISODE 3

Grab a Coffee, Lock Your Office Door and Waste an Hour of Your Friday Listening to ‘The Bum Rush: Episode Two’

(Bet you didn’t know we’re all fighters, too.) Well, since it’s almost the weekend and we know on Fridays how the second hand seems to move one tick forward and two ticks back, we figured we’d help you waste an hour of your day with another pod…

(Bet you didn’t know we’re all fighters, too.)

Well, since it’s almost the weekend and we know on Fridays how the second hand seems to move one tick forward and two ticks back, we figured we’d help you waste an hour of your day with another podcast.

Episode two features an interview with our The Ultimate Fighter 11 guest blogger and hero among men Rich Attonito, our take on this week’s big stories and a round table discussion panel with Ben, Mike, weekend CP editor Chad Dundas and our resident jack of all trades, master of none, DL "ReX13" Richardson, AKA "The Skirt Smasher."

We’re working on ironing out the bugs and are looking into other Voip options as Skype is hit or miss quality-wise.

Let us know in the comment section (like you needed to be told) what you think, what and who you want to hear on future episodes and any questions you may have for the panel or our future guests.

DOWNLOAD

Bellator XXIII Recap: OK, You Can Forget About FOX Sports Net Again…

(Zoila Frausto vs. Rosi Sexton. Props: YouTube.com/BellatorMMA)
By DL “All’s Well That Enswell” Richardson
Like summer vacations, dorm parties, and that time you dated the sex-crazed stripper, all good things must come to an end…

(Zoila Frausto vs. Rosi Sexton. Props: YouTube.com/BellatorMMA)

By DL “All’s Well That Enswell” Richardson

Like summer vacations, dorm parties, and that time you dated the sex-crazed stripper, all good things must come to an end. It was the final show for Bellator’s second season last night, and if you weren’t watching, it was your own damn fault. Louisville, Kentucky plays host for the finals in two weight classes, a women’s division superfight, and a bantamweight tourney qualifier, plus some regional action and (I assume) some horse races and bourbon tastings out of sheer habit. What surprises are in store? Who will turn in a stellar performance and make a name for themselves, as Ben Askren did just last week? Who will claim the poster-sized check and grin goofily as they hold it aloft for all to see, as Ben Askren also did last week? Will Alexander “The Dreidel” Shlemenko manage to keep his fight on the feet? Will we finally make up our minds about whether Joe Warren is a pretty cool guy who isn’t afraid of anything, or is he, after all, just a turbo douche? That’s a lot of questions — what are you, a preschooler? Seriously, if you start just asking “why?” every time I say something, I’ll turn this car around, and we won’t even go to the Louisville Slugger Museum and Factory Tour. Follow me past the jump, and all will be revealed. If you’re good, maybe I’ll talk your mother into seeing the zoo. If not, I’m taking us to see the World’s Largest Bottle of Booze.

Bellator XXII: Tappin’ Out Is For B!tches

(The Jose Vega vs. Jarrod Card knockout. Props: YouTube.com/BellatorMMA)
By DL “Low Blow” Richardson
Bellator XXII returned to the Kansas City Power and Light District last night, in the penultimate show of the second season. The wel…

(The Jose Vega vs. Jarrod Card knockout. Props: YouTube.com/BellatorMMA)

By DL “Low Blow” Richardson

Bellator XXII returned to the Kansas City Power and Light District last night, in the penultimate show of the second season. The welterweight tournament finals were the main event, but ~~“Boring”~~ “Funky” Ben Askren was part of that matchup, so those nice folks at Bellator tried to put on a good ol’ fashioned, bread and circuses, action packed kind of card. Most of the fighters had an invite to one of next season’s tournaments — conditional upon their performance in KC, MO. What we got was one KTFO, one technical submission, one tap to strikes like a pussy, and…wait, wait, wait, let me start from the beginning. After the jump, allow me to thrill you with my account of the action. And maybe apologize for my can’t miss predictions…