Knee Injury Forces Luke Rockhold Out, Launchpad McQuack in Against Tim Boetsch at UFC 166


(Started from the bottom, now he’s here. Photo via Wrestlezone.)

Some of you might have forgotten about this by now, but TUF 7 finalist CB Dolloway was basically the catalyst that sparked Mayhem Miller‘s downward spiral into insanity. In the lead up to their battle at UFC 146, Miller vowed to retire from the sport if a certain “fart-face” was able to defeat him in their undercard battle. Dollaway did just that, Mayhem was fired thereafter, and less than a month later, Miller was arrested for disrobing and vandalizing a church.

My point? That a loss to Dollaway can do shameful, harmful things to a person. And we’d hate to see Tim Boetsch reduced to such madness should he lose to Dollaway, who will be stepping in against Boetsch on a month’s notice to replace an injured (go figure) Luke Rockhold at UFC 166: Dos Santos vs. Velasquez III.


(Started from the bottom, now he’s here. Photo via Wrestlezone.)

Some of you might have forgotten about this by now, but TUF 7 finalist CB Dolloway was basically the catalyst that sparked Mayhem Miller‘s downward spiral into insanity. In the lead up to their battle at UFC 146, Miller vowed to retire from the sport if a certain “fart-face” was able to defeat him in their undercard battle. Dollaway did just that, Mayhem was fired thereafter, and less than a month later, Miller was arrested for disrobing and vandalizing a church.

My point? That a loss to Dollaway can do shameful, harmful things to a person. And we’d hate to see Tim Boetsch reduced to such madness should he lose to Dollaway, who will be stepping in against Boetsch on a month’s notice to replace an injured (go figure) Luke Rockhold at UFC 166: Dos Santos vs. Velasquez III.

Honestly, it’s probably the best scenario that Boetsch could ask for. Despite Rockhold’s current UFC record and Dollaway’s current two-fight win streak, it would be hard to argue that Boetsch isn’t receiving a significant step down in competition here.

That’s the good news. The bad news is that Dolloway is one of the more highly-decorated wrestlers in the middleweight division (see above), whom Boetsch has struggled against in the past (see his losses to Phil Davis and Mark Munoz). With two losses in his past three contests, a loss to Launchpad McQuack up there could easily see Boetsch’s second UFC tour of duty come to an end.

The two share a common opponent in Munoz, who defeated Dollaway by first round (first minute) KO back at UFC Live 3 and Boetsch by Unanimous decision at UFC 162. So using my advanced powers of MMAth, “The Barbarian” should defeat “The Doberman” by split decision. Any takers?

J. Jones

Strikeforce Neva Die, Either: Tim Kennedy vs. Roger Gracie Booked for UFC on FX 8 in Brazil [UPDATED]


(“Laundry day. Shit. It’s still only laundry day.”)

In a booking that will surely spur flashbacks of Mauro Ranallo shrieking into a microphone, two of Strikeforce’s top middleweight talents will be making their Octagon debuts against each other at the UFC’s next Brazilian event. As first reported by MMAJunkieTim Kennedy and Roger Gracie are slated to face off on the UFC on FX 8: Belfort vs. Rockhold card, which goes down May 18th at the Arena Jaraguá in Jaraguá do Sul, Brazil. [Update: GracieMag says the fight will instead take place at an event on July 6th.]

Kennedy compiled a 4-2 record in Strikeforce, with both of his losses coming in five-round title fights against Ronaldo Souza and Luke Rockhold. He most recently choked out Trevor Smith at Strikeforce: Marquardt vs. Saffiedine in January, and has been trying to stir up interest in a fight against Gracie since last July.

Gracie, who began his MMA career at heavyweight before dropping to light-heavyweight when he entered Strikeforce in 2010, has gone 2-0 during his current stint as a middleweight, scoring wins over Keith Jardine and Anthony Smith. For Roger, the fight with Kennedy is an opportunity to not only secure his place on the UFC roster, but to snap a UFC losing streak for the legendary Gracie clan. During the Zuffa era, the Gracies have gone 0-3 in the Octagon, with Royce Gracie and Renzo Gracie getting beat up by Matt Hughes, and Rolles Gracie Jr. shitting the bed against Joey Beltran.

In other UFC on FX 8 booking news…


(“Laundry day. Shit. It’s still only laundry day.”)

In a booking that will surely spur flashbacks of Mauro Ranallo shrieking into a microphone, two of Strikeforce’s top middleweight talents will be making their Octagon debuts against each other at the UFC’s next Brazilian event. As first reported by MMAJunkieTim Kennedy and Roger Gracie are slated to face off on the UFC on FX 8: Belfort vs. Rockhold card, which goes down May 18th at the Arena Jaraguá in Jaraguá do Sul, Brazil. [Update: GracieMag says the fight will instead take place at an event on July 6th.]

Kennedy compiled a 4-2 record in Strikeforce, with both of his losses coming in five-round title fights against Ronaldo Souza and Luke Rockhold. He most recently choked out Trevor Smith at Strikeforce: Marquardt vs. Saffiedine in January, and has been trying to stir up interest in a fight against Gracie since last July.

Gracie, who began his MMA career at heavyweight before dropping to light-heavyweight when he entered Strikeforce in 2010, has gone 2-0 during his current stint as a middleweight, scoring wins over Keith Jardine and Anthony Smith. For Roger, the fight with Kennedy is an opportunity to not only secure his place on the UFC roster, but to snap a UFC losing streak for the legendary Gracie clan. During the Zuffa era, the Gracies have gone 0-3 in the Octagon, with Royce Gracie and Renzo Gracie getting beat up by Matt Hughes, and Rolles Gracie Jr. shitting the bed against Joey Beltran.

In other UFC on FX 8 booking news…

Like it or not, it looks like they’re just gonna keep throwing CB Dollaway against dudes who competed on TUF Brazil. Fresh off his split-decision victory over Daniel Sarafian at UFC on FX 7, Dollaway will make his next appearance against the guy who actually won that season’s middleweight bracket, Cezar Ferreira. “Mutante” hasn’t competed since he won the show with a unanimous decision over Sergio Moraes — Sarafian’s injury replacement — which brought Ferreira’s pro record to 5-2.

On paper, Dollaway should be a solid favorite once again. And it begs the question: Is this the plan now? Will all new Brazilian middleweight prospects be forced to spend three rounds defending takedowns against Dollaway before they’re allowed into the UFC? Or do the Brazilian fans just need another American villain to photoshop into humiliating posters?

UFC on FX 7 Betting Odds: Bisping vs. Belfort and Rothwell vs. Gonzaga Are Dead Even

Unlike the freakish mismatches that plagued last weekend’s Strikeforce show, the odds for this Saturday’s UFC on FX 7: Belfort vs. Bisping event in Sao Paulo suggest a very competitive lineup of fights. In fact, two of the matches are virtually dead even, with a razor-thin margin between the favorite and the underdog. Here are the betting lines for the FX main card, courtesy of BestFightOdds.com:

Michael Bisping (-103) vs. Vitor Belfort (-107): This is about as close as it gets in MMA betting, though Belfort still comes in as a slight favorite. The line reflects the divide among fans on how the fight will play out — either Bisping will outstrike and outhustle the Phenom to a decision victory, or Belfort will maul Bisping in short order, finishing him via punches-to-the-back-of-head TKO. If you’re leaning strongly towards one of those results, feel free to put your money where your mouth is. But keep in mind that the fight is scheduled for five rounds, which certainly gives Bisping the edge if he manages to survive the first ten minutes.

Ben Rothwell (+100) vs. Gabriel Gonzaga (-110): Another close call in terms of odds, but I’m not sure that Gonzaga should be the slight favorite here. To me, he hasn’t yet shaken his reputation as a can-crusher, while Rothwell’s most recent appearance against Brendan Schaub proved him to be a ferocious finisher, hard to rattle, and in the best physical shape of his career.

Unlike the freakish mismatches that plagued last weekend’s Strikeforce show, the odds for this Saturday’s UFC on FX 7: Belfort vs. Bisping event in Sao Paulo suggest a very competitive lineup of fights. In fact, two of the matches are virtually dead even, with a razor-thin margin between the favorite and the underdog. Here are the betting lines for the FX main card, courtesy of BestFightOdds.com:

Michael Bisping (-103) vs. Vitor Belfort (-107): This is about as close as it gets in MMA betting, though Belfort still comes in as a slight favorite. The line reflects the divide among fans on how the fight will play out — either Bisping will outstrike and outhustle the Phenom to a decision victory, or Belfort will maul Bisping in short order, finishing him via punches-to-the-back-of-head TKO. If you’re leaning strongly towards one of those results, feel free to put your money where your mouth is. But keep in mind that the fight is scheduled for five rounds, which certainly gives Bisping the edge if he manages to survive the first ten minutes.

Ben Rothwell (+100) vs. Gabriel Gonzaga (-110): Another close call in terms of odds, but I’m not sure that Gonzaga should be the slight favorite here. To me, he hasn’t yet shaken his reputation as a can-crusher, while Rothwell’s most recent appearance against Brendan Schaub proved him to be a ferocious finisher, hard to rattle, and in the best physical shape of his career.

C.B. Dollaway (+164) vs. Daniel Sarafian (-165): To refresh your memory, Daniel Sarafian is the TUF Brazil finalist who had to withdraw from his finale fight due to injury. The Sao Paulo native will be making his official UFC debut this weekend, and will face a significant jump in competition against 10-fight UFC veteran CB Dollaway. Sure, Sarafian will have hometown advantage, looked nasty on TUF, and Dollaway has been battling injuries of his own. Nevertheless, Dollaway’s advantage on the mat and experience edge makes the Doberman a worthwhile ‘dog.

Khabib Nurmagomedov (-172) vs. Thiago Tavares (+160): Are you really going to bet against a guy with an 18-0 record? Are you really going to bet against a guy who can pull off a wig like this? Don’t overthink this one.

Official CagePotato Parlay: A $20 wager on Rothwell + Dollaway + Nurmagomedov would earn you a $128.48 profit on BetUS. And if it hits, all we ask is that you buy one of our t-shirts.

And Now He’s Fired: Jason ‘Mayhem’ Miller Released over “Crazy Sh*t Backstage”


Mayhem Miller and the UFC? I never want to see those two again. Props: MMAFighting.com

While it remains to be seen whether Jason “Mayhem” Miller will actually retire after his loss to C.B. Dollaway during last night’s UFC 146, he certainly won’t be having another fight in the UFC any time soon.

During last night’s post-event press conference, Dana White announced that the UFC has parted ways with Mayhem. While the news isn’t exactly surprising in any way, it’s interesting that Dana White cites “some crazy shit” that took place backstage as the reason for Miller’s release. Before you begin to speculate, the incident was not a fight. As of right now, there are no other details on the incident.

I was about to write that Jason Miller’s UFC run has been forgettable, but honestly, it was much worse than that: His career in the UFC has been memorable for entirely the wrong reasons. He’s been little more than a class clown, insulting opponents during interviews and wearing ridiculous outfits only to get thoroughly dismantled in each of his appearances. He’s looked so bad throughout his UFC career that Dana White is on record claiming that he’s seen women in Tae Bo classes with better striking.


Mayhem Miller and the UFC? I never want to see those two again. Props: MMAFighting.com

While it remains to be seen whether Jason “Mayhem” Miller will actually retire after his loss to C.B. Dollaway during last night’s UFC 146, he certainly won’t be having another fight in the UFC any time soon.

During last night’s post-event press conference, Dana White announced that the UFC has parted ways with Mayhem. While the news isn’t exactly surprising in any way, it’s interesting that Dana White cites “some crazy shit” that took place backstage as the reason for Miller’s release. Before you begin to speculate, the incident was not a fight. As of right now, there are no other details on the incident.

I was about to write that Jason Miller‘s UFC run has been forgettable, but honestly, it was much worse than that: His career in the UFC has been memorable for entirely the wrong reasons. He’s been little more than a class clown, insulting opponents during interviews and wearing ridiculous outfits only to get thoroughly dismantled in each of his appearances. He’s looked so bad throughout his UFC career that Dana White is on record claiming that he’s seen women in Tae Bo classes with better striking.

As for his final performance in the octagon against middleweight gatekeeper C.B. Dollaway, the less we say the better. It’s one thing when a smartass hack journalist jokes about changing the channel to a basketball game during your “fight”. It’s a whole different story when your boss tweets that your fight “SUCKED!!!!” before the crowd is even done booing. Injured knee or not, if Mayhem was looking to go out on a high note, he failed miserably.

Rarely one to shy away from expressing his thoughts, Dana White commented further on Mayhem’s final performance for the UFC during the press conference. “The thing is with Mayhem Miller, his last fight was embarrassing that he had with Michael Bisping after his season of The Ultimate Fighter,” said White. “Then he still comes out with pink shit on at the weigh-ins or whatever the hell he was wearing. The guy doesn’t take it serious and he looked it tonight.” Ouch.

So what do you think happens now for Jason Miller? Does he actually retire from MMA? Does he stick to crushing cans at local shows? Do you think Bellator takes a chance on him? Let us know your thoughts in the comments section.

UFC 146 Aftermath: Five Fights, Five Finishes

By Elias Cepeda


Props: MMAFighting.com

Junior dos Santos is a walking, terrifying public relations smashing machine. Not only did he Babe Ruth it and fulfill his prediction of winning by 2nd round stoppage over former two-time champion Frank Mir Saturday night, but he also provided the best feel-good photo op of the year so far.

Junior trains out of Luis Carlos Dorea’s Champion Boxing gym in Brazil which, in addition to being headquarters for world-class fighters, is home to a vibrant youth boxing program. After training one day, the UFC Primetime cameras caught one of the little tikes hanging asking Junior to take him with him to the states for his title fight.

At the time, Junior said, “we’ll see.” But he ended up bringing the 9 year-old kid and his family to Vegas to watch him win. After beating Mir, he lifted the lucky young fighter onto his shoulders and posed for the cameras along with his coaches.

Dos Santos definitely appears to have the Wanderlei Silva nice guy/maniac fighter balance down pat. Try as I might, that image warms my cynical heart, and I don’t give a damn how orchestrated it may or may not have been. Who doesn’t like watching a kid’s dream come true before their eyes?

By Elias Cepeda


Props: MMAFighting.com

Junior dos Santos is a walking, terrifying public relations smashing machine. Not only did he Babe Ruth it and fulfill his prediction of winning by 2nd round stoppage over former two-time champion Frank Mir Saturday night, but he also provided the best feel-good photo op of the year so far.

Junior trains out of Luis Carlos Dorea’s Champion Boxing gym in Brazil which, in addition to being headquarters for world-class fighters, is home to a vibrant youth boxing program. After training one day, the UFC Primetime cameras caught one of the little tikes hanging asking Junior to take him with him to the states for his title fight.

At the time, Junior said, “we’ll see.” But he ended up bringing the 9 year-old kid and his family to Vegas to watch him win. After beating Mir, he lifted the lucky young fighter onto his shoulders and posed for the cameras along with his coaches.

Dos Santos definitely appears to have the Wanderlei Silva nice guy/maniac fighter balance down pat. Try as I might, that image warms my cynical heart, and I don’t give a damn how orchestrated it may or may not have been. Who doesn’t like watching a kid’s dream come true before their eyes?

Mir’s dream of becoming the second ever three-time UFC heavyweight champion came crashing down on him, however, when he could not drag dos Santos down to the mat. Mir eat huge hellacious shots to the dome in the latter part of the first and into the second, until the final hammer fist prompted the ref to step in and stop the action.

It has been easy for this writer to continually underestimate dos Santos in some of his biggest bouts on account of his “only” having his hands. What are the chances, I’ve often found myself thinking, that he can go a whole fight without getting put on his back? Well, so far, those chances are much less likely than the chances that his opponents can go an entire fight without being hit by him.

When dos Santos touches an opponent, they drop. That’s the way it goes, we’ve come to learn.

Who’s next for him? How about a rematch with the man he beat to win the title, Cain Velasquez?

Cain got back on the winning track by dominating and brutalizing Antonio Silva, stopping him in the first round with ground strikes. Cain made Silva bleed his own blood, a lot of it, with elbows and punches, and by the end of the brief bout he looked like he was trying out for a horror flick.

He was trying out for a title shot, and I think he earned it. The only guy I’d rather see get it next, his AKA teammate Daniel Cormier, will be out for a long time with a broken hand.

Yeah, Velasquez vs. dos Santos would be a rematch but so what? Elite fighters often hang around the top of divisions together and, if we’re lucky, we get to see the best of the best go at it over and again.

Cain lost quickly to dos Santos last fall, but before that he was unbeaten and devastated the, at the time, invincible-looking champion Brock Lesnar. Modern-day Antonio Silva only loses to the best guys out there, like Fabricio Werdum, Velasquez and Cormier, and recently dominated Fedor Emelianenko. Taking him out so impressively counts for a lot, and with the timing working out, it is time for dos Santos vs. Velasquez II.

Roy Nelson found the mark with his over hand right early and knocked Dave Herman silly. He went in to add to the punishment on the ground but thankfully the ref got in there fast and stopped it. Only way Nelson could have added to the damage would have been to eat Herman, and we all know he’s watching his boyish figure these days.

Dan Hardy showed why he was still employed after four-straight losses in beating solid veteran Duane Ludwig via first round TKO. Hardy always come in shape, always gives an entertaining fight and has only lost to the best in the welterweight division. It has to feel good for the “Outlaw” to finally get back in the win-column. Now he can go get high as a kite. Hardy joined Nelson as a “knockout of the night,” bonus check recipient.

To pull guard in MMA you have to either be suicidal or a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu boss. Paul Sass and Stefan Struve were the latter in securing submission wins off of their back at UFC 146. They shared “submission of the night,” honors. All bonus winners earned extra $70,000 checks. No “fight of the night” bonuses were given.

Jamie Varner showed why he is a former world champion by beating formerly unbeaten wrecking-ball Edson Barboza via TKO after taking the fight on short notice. Way to make a re-entry to the big leagues, Jamie. Perhaps the biggest underdog of the night, scored the huge upset.

Jason “Mayhem” Miller pleaded with the UFC to give him another fight in the organization after losing badly to Michael Bisping and he got one, against C.B. Dollaway. Miller fought well and lost a close decision to Dollaway. But still, looks like, he gone. Reports are that he pulled a stunt backstage after the fight that sealed his fate. Maybe he ran into Team Cesar Gracie.

One final note, Glover Teixeira looked great in his long-awaited UFC debut. He submitted Kyle Kingsbury with an arm-triangle choke in the first round. Is it too soon to want to see Glover against some of the best in the 205lb division?

UFC 146: Dos Santos vs. Mir — Live Preliminary Card Results and Commentary


It may be an all heavyweight main card, but the bantamweight is stealing the show. Props: MMAFighting.com

We’re just hours away from UFC 146, so it’s time to turn on FX and watch the preliminary card. This evening’s all heavyweight main card will kick off with the lighter guys, as Diego Brandao makes his first post-TUF appearance against Darren Elkins, Dan Hardy and Mayhem Miller fight for their careers against Duane Ludwig and C.B. Dollaway, and Edson Barboza takes on Jamie Varner in what may potentially be the squash match/upset of the year. Handling tonight’s liveblogging duties will be Seth Falvo, who will be frantically checking to see if his beloved Philadelphia 76ers can take Game Seven during commercial breaks. Come in after the jump for live play-by-play.


It may be an all heavyweight main card, but the bantamweight is stealing the show. Props: MMAFighting.com

We’re just hours away from UFC 146, so it’s time to turn on FX and watch the preliminary card. This evening’s all heavyweight main card will kick off with the lighter guys, as Diego Brandao makes his first post-TUF appearance against Darren Elkins, Dan Hardy and Mayhem Miller fight for their careers against Duane Ludwig and C.B. Dollaway, and Edson Barboza takes on Jamie Varner in what may potentially be the squash match/upset of the year. Handling tonight’s liveblogging duties will be Seth Falvo, who will be frantically checking to see if his beloved Philadelphia 76ers can take Game Seven during commercial breaks. Come in after the jump for live play-by-play.

Good evening, jerks. I just got back from Bellator 70 in New Orleans. I’m running on two hours of sleep and three cans of Rockstar Xdurance. What I’m trying to say is, let’s just jump right into it, and try not to complain about typos, okay?

Dan Hardy vs. Duane Ludwig

Round One: Both guys start off respecting each other’s striking, hesitant to rush each other. Hardy gets clipped, as Ludwig clinches up and lands some knees to Hardy’s body. Dan Hardy recovers, and pushes Ludwig against the cage, throwing some occasional hooks to Ludwig’s body. Hardy breaks, and lands a nice combination. And a follow-up 1-2. Head kick Ludwig. Hardy throws a 1-2, and misses with the left hook. Nice knee by Ludwig, as Dan Hardy works for a takedown. Hardy now has Ludwig pinned against the cage, but Ludwig is landing knees to the body of “The Outlaw”. Just as Joe Rogan starts praising Hardy’s lead left hook, Hardy lands one right to the jaw of Duane Ludwig. He momentarily celebrates, then finishes the fight with some elbows to a downed Ludwig until Josh Rosenthal stops it. Good start to the night.

Dan Hardy def. Duane Ludwig via KO, 3:51, Round One

And before anyone brings it up: Yes, I heard Arianny was arrested this morning. I didn’t say she was stealing the show for good reasons.

C.B. Dollaway vs. Jason “Mayhem” Miller

Round One: Miller comes out and lands a cross right to Dollaway. Mayhem appears to lock in a guillotine, but Dollaway is out and takes Mayhem’s back. Miller gets back up, and gives Dollaway a noogie. Seriously. Dollaway lands a cross, and now they’re back in the center of the cage. Dollaway drops Mayhem with another cross, causing Joe Rogan to speculate that Mayhem has blown out his knee, which is already wrapped and bandaged.  His inability to stand seems to support that theory. Dollaway takes Mayhem’s back, but he can’t get his hooks in. The crowd starts to boo, as Dollaway is doing nothing but hold on, as Mayhem is unable to stand. Miller tries getting up, although Dollaway is doing a good job at keeping Miller down. I wish he would, you know, do something, but I digress. Dollaway works for a kimura, but gives up on it and mounts Mayhem. Miller escapes, and manages to stand as the round ends.

Round Two: Nice jab by Dollaway. Miller is clearly favoring that knee, as Dollaway earns a takedown, but lets Miller back up. Miller catches Dollaway behind the ear, and works to finish, but Dollaway reverses position. Miller manages to get up, but Dollaway has him pinned against the cage. The crowd is booing the lack of action, as Dollaway unsuccessfully attempts a takedown. Miller works for a guillotine, as the crowd boos louder. Miller gives up on the guillotine, and Dollaway throws a few punches from Miller’s half guard. Emphasis on “a few”. This crowd is nearly booing these guys into actually doing something. The Boston Celtics are on top of the Philadelphia 76ers, 17-14, if you’re curious. The round ends with Dollaway in Mayhem’s guard, and the crowd is not impressed.

Round Three: Miller throws a couple of punches, but Dollaway takes him down by that bad knee, and the crowd boos. Miller’s right hand is trapped behind his back, if Dollaway wants to, you know, throw some punches or something. The ref continues to warn them to work, the crowd continues to boo…anyone mind if I change it to the Sixers/Celtics game? Okay, fine. Dollaway now has Miller’s back, and tries to get his hooks in as he occasionally throws a punch. It’s kind of funny to hear Joe Rogan try to save this one. Dollaway finally gets his hooks in, as Miller grabs the cage. C.B. is FINALLY throwing some punches that Mayhem isn’t even trying to defend. Dollaway mounts Miller as this “fight” comes to an end. The crowd boos loudly.

Peace out, Mayhem. I wish I could say it’s been fun to watch you in the UFC.

C.B. Dollaway def. Jason “Mayhem” Miller via unanimous decision.

Dollaway talks about how he was hurt during the second round, how he was injured before this contest, and gives a shoutout to Miami Heat forward Mike Miller, who is part owner of Power MMA & Fitness, where C.B. trains. The crowd is not done booing as we cut to commercials.

No comment on the judge who scored this one 30-26. 29-28 is acceptable, as anyone who gets a noogie during a round automatically loses it in my book.

Edson Barboza vs. Jamie Varner

If the prelims were a Gallagher show, this would be the point where the audience shields themselves with plastic while cheering loudly. If this one somehow doesn’t deliver blood, you can all blame me for jinxing it with that last sentence. Oh no…not Steve Mazzagatti.

Round One: Leg kicks from Barboza as this one starts off. Head kick attempt from Barboza, but Varner catches it and takes him down. Varner now in Barboza’s half guard and throwing punches. After that last “fight”, the crowd is conditioned to boo anything that happens on the ground, and reacts accordingly. Barboza gets back up and throws a leg kick. “Barboza” chants from the crowd, as Varner counters a leg kick with a nice cross. Varner is yet to check a leg kick, and Barboza is really taking advantage. Varner catches Barboza with a huge cross, and takes him down. Barboza gets away, but then gets rocked by another huge cross (?!?!?!?!) and rains down punches until Mazzagatti stops it.

Well HOL-LEE SHIT! It was short and brutal alright, but not nearly in the way that anyone who has paid attention to MMA since 2008 and isn’t named “Varner” was expecting. Yeah, you can call it a comeback.

Jamie Varner def. Edson Barboza via TKO (punches), 2:23, Round One.

True story: Autocorrect tried to fix that last sentence.

We’ve got Kyle Kingsbury vs. Glover Teixeira from the Facebook preliminary card in order to kill time. Other than Kingsbury’s killer mustache, this fight was all Teixeira. Dominant performance capped off with an arm-triangle choke submission, 1:53 into Round One.

Last fight before the PPV up next.

Diego Brandao vs. Darren Elkins

But before we get to that, we’ve got some obligatory hype for the PPV, as Rogan and Goldberg act like Velasquez vs. Bigfoot should be a close fight. Then again, after what we’ve already seen tonight, I dont know what to believe about anything anymore.

Round One: Nice combination from Brandao, capped off with a leg kick. Huge swing and a miss from Brandao, as Elkins gets Brandao to the ground. Nice reversal from Brandao, who ends up in Elkins’ guard. Elkins attempts a kimura, but loses it, as Brandao stands up. Brandao is really swinging for the fences, but he’s missing. Nice knee from Brandao, as Elkins is dropped and Brandao ends up in side control. He throws a few punches, notices Elkins attempt a submission, and then stands back up. Nice 1-2 from Elkins. Brandao lands one of those huge right hands and follows up with another cross, dropping Elkins. Elkins recovers and attempts a guillotine, but Brandao escapes and rains down punches from inside Elkins’ guard. Elkins grabs an arm, but is unable to do anything with it. Brandao stands up, throws a kick to the downed Elkins and then lands another right hand. Elkins holds on as this one comes to an end.

Round Two: They touch gloves. Elkins throws a left hook that completely misses. Nice knee from Brandao. Brandao attempts a lead uppercut, which is countered nicely by Elkins with a cross. Nice back elbow from Brandao. Rogan compares it to Anderson Silva, Goldberg compares it to Jon Jones, and they’re both wrong, as that elbow barely phased Elkins. Brandao slips, and Elkins winds up in Brandao’s guard. Brandao attempts an upkick, and nearly gives up his back as it misses. Elkins back in Brandao’s guard attempting to pass, as Brandao throws elbows from the guard. Elkins passes to half guard, and eventually gets full mount. Big punches from Elkins, and Brandao looks hurt. The crowd is chanting “Diego” as this round comes to an end.

Round Three: Brandao is clearly gassed, and throws some desperate lead uppercuts. Elkins counters with a 1-2, and manages to get Brandao to the ground. Elkins throws punches from Diego Brandao’s guard, as Rogan explains that Brandao wasted all of his energy looking for the finish in the first round. Full mount by Elkins with half of a round left, as he begins to rain down punches. Elkins with an arm-in guillotine, but Brandao escapes and stands back up. Brandao manages to drag Elkins down and looks to mount Elkins, but Elkins manages to pull guard. Brandao is too gassed to put together any meaningful offense, as this one comes to an end with Elkins throwing punches from the guard. I’ve got it 29-28 Elkins.

Okay, I’m glad I’m not the only one who heard Joe Rogan say “He’s getting fucked up” at the end of the second round.

Darren Elkins def. Diego Brandao via unanimous decision.

Very interesting night of fights. It looks like the Sixers are down by four, the heavyweights are about to take over the card, and the preliminary broadcast is coming to a close. That”s all for me tonight. Enjoy the main card.