(Rule #1 Tito: ALWAYS check for an Adam’s apple before you make your move.)
When we first heard that former UFC lightweight champion Tito Ortiz had purchased Oscar De La Hoya’s training compound, with only one fight left in his career, mind you, we just wrote it off as the kind of business decision that got him fired by Donald Trump. But if you know anything about “The People’s Champ,” you know that the guy more than makes up for his interview skills with business savvy. We may not be sure of the exact figure Tito dropped on this Big Bear Lake-side abode, but you only need to catch a glimpse of the place to realize it was worth it.
Fair warning: the euphoric feeling you will receive as the incredibly gorgeous, CagePotato-loving Corissa Furr leads you around this rustic villa on the latest episode of Ultimate Insiderwill immediately be followed by the crushing realization that you will NEVER live in a place so nice no matter how hard you try.
Video after the jump.
(Rule #1 Tito: ALWAYS check for an Adam’s apple before you make your move.)
When we first heard that former UFC lightweight champion Tito Ortiz had purchased Oscar De La Hoya’s training compound, with only one fight left in his career, mind you, we just wrote it off as the kind of business decision that got him fired by Donald Trump. But if you know anything about “The People’s Champ,” you know that the guy more than makes up for his interview skills with business savvy. We may not be sure of the exact figure Tito dropped on this Big Bear Lake-side abode, but you only need to catch a glimpse of the place to realize it was worth it.
Fair warning: the euphoric feeling you will receive as the incredibly gorgeous, CagePotato-loving Corissa Furr leads you around this rustic villa on the latest episode of Ultimate Insiderwill immediately be followed by the crushing realization that you will NEVER live in a place so nice no matter how hard you try.
First off, was anyone aware that Ortiz and Jenna Jameson were back together? The last we remember, these two were going at it on Twitter like a pair of attention-whoring celebutants. Secondly, what in holy Hell has happened to Jenna Jameson’s face? It looks like some Tijuana back alley surgeon stretched a piece of bologna over Gwyneth Paltrow’s elbow for Christ’s sake. That is not the same woman that captured America’s penises hearts with her acting talents just under a decade ago.
As if the house wasn’t enough to make you turn green with envy, one look at Ortiz’s car collection might just make you curse the heavens above for giving you the body structure and fighting ability of a thirteen year old girl. Not that we could relate, because the CP staff is built like the O’Doyle family and treats the rest of the MMA world as such. But anyway, a Rolls Royce Phantom, which Ortiz describes as “like a house on wheels, literally, that’s how much it cost” and 2012 Porsche rest outside his training facility, along with a few vehicles Ortiz probably didn’t have the time to talk about — apparently he isn’t aware that bitches really give it up for a Ford Fiesta covered in Spice Girls stickers from the previous owner.
Around the three minute mark you will find that *spoiler* De La Hoya actually built two houses on the grounds, the second of which contains yet another billiards table, a monster-sized jacuzzi, and a double staircase straight out of Scarface. All I’m saying is, if I had a place like this, not even the hundred men or more described in Toto’s “Africa” could drag me away from it. Then again, if the old hag I am currently throwing it to ever has the common decency to croak already, I may just get that opportunity.
Ortiz, on the other hand, will get the opportunity to retire Forrest Griffin from life at UFC 148, which goes down from the MGM Grand in Las Vegas on July 7th.
(Seen here: Bob Sapp’s most legit fight in the past five years.)
If you’ve followed this thing we call MMA for even a couple years now, then you’ve undoubtedly heard of the travesty to the sport that is Bob Sapp. If he were a band, the boys over at MetalSucks would refer to him as “A Shitstain on the Ass of the Universe,” which is perhaps the most appropriate label to place on someone who seems to be doing his damnedest to soil the metaphorical trousers of the sport we hold dear.
Possibly sent on a mission of mercy by the fellas over at Mitch and Murray, Ariel Helwani decided to bring Sapp onto his show, “The MMA Hour,” to dispel or confirm the general consensus that he has thrown most, if not all of his fights over the past four or five years. What started off as at least a coherent defense on Sapp’s part quickly spiraled into a smorgasbord of nonsensical rants and accusations punctuated by creepy, baritone laughter, before concluding with several futile attempts by “The Beast” to justify his pathetic existence through Youtube hits, or something like that. In other words, it was typical Bob Sapp.
Just take this gem, for instance, which actually came before Sapp decided to go full retard:
I will receive no damage to my body that will be long lasting for a small insignificant amount of cash. I think we’ve seen that now with examples with the NFL and the fact that some of these guys are coming back and saying, “Hey we want some money, we have brain damage.” I’m getting paid well underneath what a professional boxer would, or Manny Pacquiao. So I will, in no means ever, will I sustain long-lasting damage for a small paycheck. Never will that happen, never will “The Beast” ever have that happen.
Join us after the jump for the whole interview.
(Seen here: Bob Sapp‘s most legit fight in the past five years.)
If you’ve followed this thing we call MMA for even a couple years now, then you’ve undoubtedly heard of the travesty to the sport that is Bob Sapp. If he were a band, the boys over at MetalSucks would refer to him as “A Shitstain on the Ass of the Universe,” which is perhaps the most appropriate label to place on someone who seems to be doing his damnedest to soil the metaphorical trousers of the sport we hold dear.
Possibly sent on a mission of mercy by the fellas over at Mitch and Murray, Ariel Helwani decided to bring Sapp onto his show, “The MMA Hour,” to dispel or confirm the general consensus that he has thrown most, if not all of his fights over the past four or five years. What started off as at least a coherent defense on Sapp’s part quickly spiraled into a smorgasbord of nonsensical rants and accusations punctuated by creepy, baritone laughter, before concluding with several futile attempts by “The Beast” to justify his pathetic existence through Youtube hits, or something like that. In other words, it was typical Bob Sapp.
Just take this gem, for instance, which actually came before Sapp decided to go full retard:
I will receive no damage to my body that will be long lasting for a small insignificant amount of cash. I think we’ve seen that now with examples with the NFL and the fact that some of these guys are coming back and saying, “Hey we want some money, we have brain damage.” I’m getting paid well underneath what a professional boxer would, or Manny Pacquiao. So I will, in no means ever, will I sustain long-lasting damage for a small paycheck. Never will that happen, never will “The Beast” ever have that happen.
(The interview starts around the 2:13:00 mark.)
Some notable quotes from Sapp include:
On his appearance fee: On average, it’s roughly around that $30,000 to $40,000 a fight range. And that can be a bit misleading because in between time, I am doing the television shows and commercials and things of this nature and so when you say on average, that’s what it is. Obviously it calculates to be significant more between three to five times that, yes that is correct. However, when you talk about just the fights, with me, you have to worry about the schedule commercials and stuff like that, but just the fights right now, you are looking at basically $30,000 to $40,000.
On whether or not he is throwing fights: Am I throwing these fights? No. Will I go into that ring and receive large amounts of damage for small paychecks? No. When it came to K-1, at the time, when everyone at K-1 was doing well they get paid significantly enough to have you go into that ring, and hey, any kind of injury you get, they are going to pay. Let me give you an example: Mirko Cro Cop, he cracked my eye socket. Mirko Cro Cop, he received his paycheck, I received my paycheck and they also paid for my entire hospital bill. These small organizations that you see that look so wonderful, they pay none of your bills if you get hurt, period. If you want to get hurt for a small amount of money in a fight, we call that the military. If you would like to get hurt in an arena where it is supposed to be sanctioned and it is supposed to be safe and their supposed to pay for at least your medical bills if you get hurt, then we call that entertainment. If you want to see two strangers fight for free, you can do that. We will give you seven dollars and go in a night club and you can see two drunks getting it on in the corner, fighting. You have no idea who they are and you can do that for free. My fans and my family they will stand by me and behind me, win or lose. So, Bob Sapp, I guess it is easy to love a winner.
On how he justifies his increasingly terrible performances: One thing that I say, is let’s take a look and rewind back. You saw some historical and difficult fights that I fought with Ernesto Hoost and with Antonio Noguiera, this is correct. If you were to take a look at what recently has happened with K-1 and the fact that you had wonderful, great, strong fighters such as Ray Sefo fight for K-1 and then K-1 leaves and they were left without collecting a paycheck. So, when “The Beast” enters the ring, is he in there to collect a paycheck? The answer is hell yes! You’re asking, “Bob you are receiving less damage, there is no amount of damage that you are receiving and sometimes these fights are being lost.” Well, if you would want to put numbers on my record, whether they be a zero or number one, you will be doing so on my paycheck. That is what it is, plain and simple. The Beast is number one in the media for every 12 fights, that is correct. We see this and we know this. I’m number one in every media category. Number one in the entertainment, number one for the views, I am number one and I have a losing record. So, if I was to come in on a winning record, these small organizations, the last thing they would be able to do is afford my services and on top of it, what am I going to do? Be number one and number one? If I am, they are no longer going to be able to afford me. So I just won myself out of a job.
Other interesting things of note:
-After Helwani begs Sapp to stop with his “shtick” and just answer his questions honestly, Sapp more or less agrees to have sex with Ariel on pay-per-view if the price is right. We’ve never seen a moose impregnate a chickadee before, but we imagine that it would at the minimum last longer than twelve seconds.
-Sapp also tries to justify his loss to Minowaman as legit because Minowaman won the Super Hulk Tournament for Christ’s sake, and is therefore a champion. Technically, we must agree with him.
-Ariel makes a challenge to Sapp, not unlike our own, to see if he can last until exactly the one minute mark of his next fight, which is scheduled to take place in Kazakhstan. Clearly Ariel is not aware that Sapp can not count past eleventeen.
-Around the 2:50:00 mark, Sapp’s mind apparently short-circuits, and he launches into a series of bizarre accents and incoherent dialogue that no human on this planet including Sapp himself could even begin to understand. Helwani proceeds to hand him a verbal beatdown worse than any actual beatdown he has received in the past few years.
If there is some sort of Purple Heart handed out for MMA journalism, Helwani just earned it for suffering through that mind-numbing interview.
(Equinso Ocha: Always holding the black man down.)
We could be wrong, because he speaks with a comprehensibility that would give a stenographer an aneurysm, but it definitely sounded like boxing great/MMA not-so-great James Toney just called former UFC light heavyweight champion Quinton “Rampage” Jackson a “slave” in a recent interview with EsNewsReporting.com. Granted, he also claims that the UFC paid, and is still paying him, a grand total of 1.5 million dollars for his UFC 118 “fight” against Randy Couture, a notion that we know is complete and utter bullshit, but listen to what he had to say when asked about Rampage’s recurring plight with the UFC:
That’s what you get for being a slave to the white man. Don’t be scared. Step up and speak for yourself. That’s why I got paid the million-and-a-half dollars and am still getting paid by the UFC. You know what I’m sayin’? The highest paid fighter ever. You feel me, fat boy? Me. And you been there…what, twenty years and you’re getting paid pennies? While I make millions?
Rampage, if you wanna fight me boy? Come on down to the gym and I’ll give you a job first. …you could be the sparring partner. I pay $50 for a sparring partner.
First off, if you supposedly got paid $1.5 large at UFC 118, why is it that you only pay your sparring partners a measly fifty dollars? Who looks like an asshole now? You, Mr. Toney, that’s who.
Check out the video interview, along with our best attempt at transcribing it to English, after the jump.
(Equinso Ocha: Always holding the black man down.)
We could be wrong, because he speaks with a comprehensibility that would give a stenographer an aneurysm, but it definitely sounded like boxing great/MMA not-so-great James Toney just called former UFC light heavyweight champion Quinton “Rampage” Jackson a “slave” in a recent interview with EsNewsReporting.com. Granted, he also claims that the UFC paid, and is still paying him, a grand total of 1.5 million dollars for his UFC 118 “fight” against Randy Couture, a notion that we know is complete and utter bullshit, but listen to what he had to say when asked about Rampage’s recurring plight with the UFC:
That’s what you get for being a slave to the white man. Don’t be scared. Step up and speak for yourself. That’s why I got paid the million-and-a-half dollars and am still getting paid by the UFC. You know what I’m sayin’? The highest paid fighter ever. You feel me, fat boy? Me. And you been there…what, twenty years and you’re getting paid pennies? While I make millions?
Rampage, if you wanna fight me boy? Come on down to the gym and I’ll give you a job first. …you could be the sparring partner. I pay $50 for a sparring partner.
First off, if you supposedly got paid $1.5 large at UFC 118, why is it that you only pay your sparring partners a measly fifty dollars? Who looks like an asshole now? You, Mr. Toney, that’s who.
Considering Rampage has used almost the exact same language, figuratively speaking, to describe how the UFC has treated him, you can’t imagine he’ll be too offended/pissed off by old Mushmouth’s criticisms, right?
Toney had a lot more to say, go figure, and some of it was almost understandable. We tried our best to transcribe and translate the rest of it, and we’re pretty sure it gave us cancer. So enjoy.
On Rampage’s chances in a sparring session: “Who? Unahgigitkncokedout anddatbelt. Hes goin’ get *suffers small stroke* Comebehimenuniswill….comenuniswill, right? Comenunis…you, YOU, Kele calamari express. You watchen sparrin, UC howa, no how hard I hit. Waswalleybefor.”
[Translation: I predict that if us two gents were to have a rousing back-and-forth duel under Marquess of Queensbury rules, I would emerge victorious, thanks in no small part to my vastly superior striking and brilliant display of handwork. You’ve seen me fight, haven’t you, sir? Cheerio.]
On why his freak show fight with Ken Shamrock never happened: “…the most dangerous girl in the world. They had ‘em atheythey couldn’t afford me ’cause they had money (?) and some bullshit motherfuckin Ivalo Gutier, you know Ivalo?”
[Translation: Ken Shamrock is a ninny little ray of sunshine. The fight promoters could not afford to pay me such a daunting commission because they lacked the proper funding to do so. Also, boxing manager Ivalo Gotzev, whom you are familiar with, correct?]
On what would have happened if they had fought: “yuyuknow he’d get knocked out. You know, he know, you know, why he got scared asitizz. He scared. That mofuka….*indescernable* I don’t play. I mean bidness.”
[You and I both know what would happen, good sir knight. He is rather intimidated by me, that wretch is. I am not here to tussle my tallywacker. I am a professional.]
So when he sat down alongside current WBA (super), WBC, and The Ring super middleweight champion Andre Ward on last night’s edition of Inside MMA, the inevitable question came up: who does he think are the top five best boxers in MMA?
Check out Freddie’s top five, along with his thoughts on GSP vs. A. Silva, after the jump.
(That moment when you get hit so hard you shit your pants in front of the whole gym.)
So when he sat down alongside current WBA (super), WBC, and The Ring super middleweight champion Andre Ward on last night’s edition of Inside MMA, the inevitable question came up: who does he think are the top five best boxers in MMA?
Freddie’s Top Five 5. K.J. Noons – ”K.J. is always in my gym and he’s very dedicated with his work ethic. I just love his tenacity in the ring. He comes to fight and he’s all about action.”
4. Nick Diaz– “Nick Diaz is one of the most exciting fighters in the world, today. He’s great with his hands. He gets sidetracked a little bit, like in his last fight, but I think he’ll a great comeback. I’m looking forward to facing him with “GSP” someday, ’cause there’s a lot of talk about that.”
3. B.J. Penn– “You know, B.J., he’s one of the best strikers I’ve ever faced, and that I’ve ever been in the ring with. It’s been quite a few years ago, and I think he’s close to retiring right now, but I’d call him the “James Toney of MMA,” because his weight would fluctuate quite a bit. He’ll fight from low weights to heavyweights. He’ll fight anyone in the world. He’s a good guy to be around, and he’s just a hard, hard worker and a great striker.”
2. George St. Pierre– “GSP’s one of the greatest guys in the world. He’s a real gentleman and one of the best students I’ve ever had. I asked him, ‘How long did you go home and practice in front of the mirror last night?’ Because if I show him a move, he comes back with it the next day, and you know he practiced all night in front of the mirror. So, I love the guy. He’s a good guy and a hard worker, and that’s what it’s all about it hard work.”
1. Anderson Silva– “I had the honor of working with Anderson Silva, when he was in our gym for about five or six days in a row. He told me, ‘I’m pretty good at MMA, but I’m not too goo at boxing.’ He’s just a real humble guy and very talented. He is one of the best guys that really understands distance and timing. He fights off the ropes a little bit. I told him that can be a little bit dangerous sometimes and to be careful, but he’ll suck you in, he’ll set you up, he’s one of the most intelligent fighters I’ve ever seen and have ever worked with.”
While you’re thinking your own lists over, check out part of the interview from last night’s episode, in which Roach and Ward break down the Dana White approved Anderson Silva vs. GSP match, their favorite aspects of MMA other than boxing, and boxing’s current decline, or lack thereof.
Though Chael Sonnen claims to be “The Most Interesting Man in the World,” the title could very well go to long time UFC color commentator Joe Rogan. The man can turn an ice spill into comedy gold. He will put any referee with a last name sounding like Maserati on the spot without a seconds notice. And God forbid you try and diss him during one of his stand up routines. When he turns his hat backwards, it gives him a feeling of super strength that would make Lincoln Hawk piss his pants. Simply put, the man is a DMT tripping, BJJ grappling, spin kick throwing force that rarely fails to entertain when placed in front of a camera.
With the first ever live season of The Ultimate Fighter kicking off tonight, Rogan sat down and shared some of his favorite moments in the show’s history. Go figure, Forrest Griffin and Stephan Bonnar‘s war at the TUF 1 Finale was the first thing to be discussed. Here’s what he had to say:
The first season was the first time reality television was integrated with such an exciting and intense growing sport, and it came together in the most beautiful and poetic way possible with the finals … The estimations were that there were as many as eight million people watching this fight. That’s unfathomable! People are at home, and they were calling their friends up, and they’re like, ‘Dude! You’ve gotta watch this. There is a crazy fight going on and these two white guys are beating the fuck out of each other!’ And that was the birth of modern mixed martial arts. That was the fight that put it on the map.
Though Chael Sonnen claims to be “The Most Interesting Man in the World,” the title could very well go to long time UFC color commentator Joe Rogan. The man can turn an ice spill into comedy gold. He will put any referee with a last name sounding like Maserati on the spot without a seconds notice. And God forbid you try and diss him during one of his stand up routines. When he turns his hat backwards, it gives him a feeling of super strength that would make Lincoln Hawk piss his pants. Simply put, the man is a DMT tripping, BJJ grappling, spin kick throwing force that rarely fails to entertain when placed in front of a camera.
With the first ever live season of The Ultimate Fighter kicking off tonight, Rogan sat down and shared some of his favorite moments in the show’s history. Go figure, Forrest Griffin and Stephan Bonnar‘s war at the TUF 1 Finale was the first thing to be discussed. Here’s what he had to say:
The first season was the first time reality television was integrated with such an exciting and intense growing sport, and it came together in the most beautiful and poetic way possible with the finals … The estimations were that there were as many as eight million people watching this fight. That’s unfathomable! People are at home, and they were calling their friends up, and they’re like, ‘Dude! You’ve gotta watch this. There is a crazy fight going on and these two white guys are beating the fuck out of each other!’ And that was the birth of modern mixed martial arts. That was the fight that put it on the map.
(Seconds after becoming the world’s first active-duty UFC Champion, Brian Stann happened to witness a gang of streetwise thugs kidnapping WWE superstar John Cena’s wife. And now he won’t stop until until the streets…are safe again. Brian Stann IS The Marine 2: The Actual Marine .)
We’re not going to suggest that Brian Stann might be looking past his upcoming UFC on FUEL TV 2 bout with Italian striker Alessio Sakara, because here at CP, we don’t just jump to conclusions. But granted Stann is successful come April 14th, he already has his next opponent in mind. And believe it or not, it’s Michael Bisping. When asked on the subject of dream opponents by EsNewsReporting, Stann was quick to reply:
Michael Bisping. I wouldn’t try to do anything but walk straight through him with a right hand. Here’s the deal: I don’t know Michael personally, sometimes I think he gets a bum rap and I’ve learned not to judge people off the media and things of that nature. After my last fight he had a few comments about my technique and who I was as a fighter that I thought were a little odd. He called me a ‘white belt’ and said that I was ‘exposed’ so I’d love to see him put his money where his mouth is. We can fight and we can solve that. He may be a great guy, I don’t know, and maybe he is, but I would just like to compete against him since he made those comments.
(Seconds after becoming the world’s first active-duty UFC Champion, Brian Stann happened to witness a gang of streetwise thugs kidnapping WWE superstar John Cena’s wife. And now he won’t stop until until the streets…are safe again. Brian Stann IS The Marine 2: The Actual Marine .)
We’re not going to suggest that Brian Stann might be looking past his upcoming UFC on FUEL TV 2 bout with Italian striker Alessio Sakara, because here at CP, we don’t just jump to conclusions. But granted Stann is successful come April 14th, he already has his next opponent in mind. And believe it or not, it’s Michael Bisping. When asked on the subject of dream opponents by EsNewsReporting, Stann was quick to reply:
Michael Bisping. I wouldn’t try to do anything but walk straight through him with a right hand. Here’s the deal: I don’t know Michael personally, sometimes I think he gets a bum rap and I’ve learned not to judge people off the media and things of that nature. After my last fight he had a few comments about my technique and who I was as a fighter that I thought were a little odd. He called me a ‘white belt’ and said that I was ‘exposed’ so I’d love to see him put his money where his mouth is. We can fight and we can solve that. He may be a great guy, I don’t know, and maybe he is, but I would just like to compete against him since he made those comments.
Both Bisping and Stann are coming off losses to number one middleweight contender Chael Sonnen, the only difference being that Stann succumbed to a second round arm triangle choke at UFC 136 and Bisping dropped a controversial decision at the second UFC on Fox event. Like we said, if Stann makes it by Sakara, who has been a gatekeeper of sorts in his UFC career, a match with Bisping would make perfect sense, don’t you think?
Whether Stann is looking past Sakara or not remains to be seen, but you can definitely tell that Bisping has gotten inside the former WEC Light Heavyweight Champion’s head. Sure, Alessio hasn’t fought in nearly a year, forced out of bouts with everything from ACL tears to bad tuna fish sandwiches, and sure, Sakara’s jaw will probably be to reduced to ash when Stann’s fist finds it. But the fact that he’s already got Bisping on his mind says something about the Brit’s “world renowned” trash talking abilities, and he hasn’t even started yet. A word to the wise Brian, no good comes from looking past an opponent.
