Sometimes, there’s no shame in being a can crusher. As much as we love watching close fights between our sport’s top fighters, some of our sport’s most entertaining finishes came to fruition because a fighter of reasonable competence was locked in the cage with an utterly hopeless ham-n-egger. There’s nothing wrong with pounding the bejesus out of a hapless jobber every once in a while, which is exactly what Mariusz Pudzianowski, Jan Blachowicz and Dusan Panajotovic did yesterday. Fortunately for us, they filmed it for posterity as well.
At thirty-five years old, “can crusher” is probably the ceiling for five-time World’s Strongest Man Mariusz Pudzianowski’s MMA career. The odds of him ending up in the big leagues outside of his home country are pretty slim- which is perfect, because he seems more than content to smash freaks and nobodies in front of enthusiastic Polish fans. At yesterday’s KSW 20, Pudzianowski faced 4-1 Greek American prospect Christos Piliafas. All of Piliafas’ fights have ended by TKO- four of which in the first round. A technical grappling clinic this would not be, as Pudzianowski scored takedowns and eventually punched out Piliafas 3:48 seconds into round one. Unfortunately, videos of this scrap have quickly been taken off of YouTube. We know, we’re just as heartbroken as you are.
But as a consolation prize, we’re going to offer you KSW Light Heavyweight Champion Jan Blachowicz’s successful title defense against Houston Alexander from the same card. A win over Alexander may not mean too much anymore, yet Blachowicz never appeared in trouble throughout the fight. Unfortunately, save for an armbar at the end of round one and a triangle choke at the end of round two, neither did Alexander. Okay, so it’s a pretty lousy consolation prize. Whaddayagonnado?
*sigh*
Sometimes, there’s no shame in being a can crusher. As much as we love watching close fights between our sport’s top fighters, some of our sport’s most entertaining finishes came to fruition because a fighter of reasonable competence was locked in the cage with an utterly hopeless ham-n-egger. There’s nothing wrong with pounding the bejesus out of a hapless jobber every once in a while, which is exactly what Mariusz Pudzianowski, Jan Blachowicz and Dusan Panajotovic did yesterday. Fortunately for us, they filmed it for posterity as well.
At thirty-five years old, “can crusher” is probably the ceiling for five-time World’s Strongest Man Mariusz Pudzianowski’s MMA career. The odds of him ending up in the big leagues outside of his home country are pretty slim- which is perfect, because he seems more than content to smash freaks and nobodies in front of enthusiastic Polish fans. At yesterday’s KSW 20, Pudzianowski faced 4-1 Greek American prospect Christos Piliafas. All of Piliafas’ fights have ended by TKO- four of which in the first round. A technical grappling clinic this would not be, as Pudzianowski scored takedowns and eventually punched out Piliafas 3:48 seconds into round one. Unfortunately, videos of this scrap have quickly been taken off of YouTube. We know, we’re just as heartbroken as you are.
But as a consolation prize, we’re going to offer you KSW Light Heavyweight Champion Jan Blachowicz’s successful title defense against Houston Alexander from the same card. A win over Alexander may not mean too much anymore, yet Blachowicz never appeared in trouble throughout the fight. Unfortunately, save for an armbar at the end of round one and a triangle choke at the end of round two, neither did Alexander. Okay, so it’s a pretty lousy consolation prize. Whaddayagonnado?
One final note: Bob Sapp apparently retired after his most recent humiliating defeat, and quickly unretired to fight Dusan Panajotovic before anyone could actually enjoy him not being around. Despite the professionalism that Ultimate Fight Serbia tries to convey- and by the way, I can’t help but feel like I’ve seen their logo before – they booked Bob Sapp to fight and got exactly what they paid for. They got a YouTube hype video that looked like this:
Hope you jerks are having a better Father’s Day than some of us.
Yesterday didn’t just provide us with depressing fights from former contenders. We also got to witness a fight from former champion Tim Sylvia and Jong Dae Kim attempt to win The Bob Sapp Challenge™. Okay, so it was still somewhat depressing. But at least you won’t feel guilty for pointing and laughing at anyone involved, so what else can you ask for?
Tim Sylvia has been making a valiant effort to win fights and get back to the UFC as of late- although the overwhelming majority of his battles have taken place on Twitter and YouTube. Fresh off of back-to-back TKO losses to Patrick Cote and dignity, Tim Sylvia decided to do his fighting inside the cage last night against Randy Smith, a thirty-eight year old journeyman who entered the bout with a 13-10-1 professional record. A can of his caliber shouldn’t last ten seconds in the cage with a former UFC champion, yet Smith defied the odds by being knocked twelve seconds into the first round.
Impressive victory over a game opponent? Not so much. Will it take our minds off of his last effort, a forgettable decision over Andreas Kraniotakes at the abysmal Pro Elite 2: Big Guns? Trick question- we’ve blocked that fight from our memories a long time ago. Low-Quality to the point of being virtually unwatchable video after the jump? You betcha.
Hope you jerks are having a better Father’s Day than some of us.
Yesterday didn’t just provide us with depressing fights from former contenders. We also got to witness a fight from former champion Tim Sylvia and Jong Dae Kim attempt to win The Bob Sapp Challenge™. Okay, so it was still somewhat depressing. But at least you won’t feel guilty for pointing and laughing at anyone involved, so what else can you ask for?
Tim Sylvia has been making a valiant effort to win fights and get back to the UFC as of late- although the overwhelming majority of his battles have taken place on Twitter and YouTube. Fresh off of back-to-back TKO losses to Patrick Cote and dignity, Tim Sylvia decided to do his fighting inside the cage last night against Randy Smith, a thirty-eight year old journeyman who entered the bout with a 13-10-1 professional record. A can of his caliber shouldn’t last ten seconds in the cage with a former UFC champion, yet Smith defied the odds by being knocked out twelve seconds into the first round.
Impressive victory over a game opponent? Not so much. Will it take our minds off of his last effort, a forgettable decision over Andreas Kraniotakes at the abysmal Pro Elite 2: Big Guns? Trick question- we’ve blocked that fight from our memories a long time ago. Low-Quality to the point of being virtually unwatchable video after the jump? You betcha.
As for Jong Dae Kim? He fought Bob Sapp at last night’s Road FC 8 in Seoul, South Korea. And believe it or not, Bob Sapp actually fought back. For a few moments, it even looked like Bob Sapp would win. We’re only one week removed from Tölegen Akylbekov setting the bar for The Bob Sapp Challenge™ at one minute, twenty four seconds, yet the bar has already been raised to three minutes, fourteen seconds of round two. That’s not a typo. Enjoy.
Speaking of things that happened last night that were laughably predictable, Kimbo Slice is still earning his bread as a professional boxer. Well, perhaps “earning” is the wrong word. Earning implies that he is making it by winning competitive matches against reasonably credible opponents. Really, $kala is just giving Kimbo his bread at this point. Or, if you’re cheesy enough to go there, Shaw is just feeding the guy.
Speaking of things that happened last night that were laughably predictable, Kimbo Slice is still earning his bread as a professional boxer. Well, perhaps “earning” is the wrong word. Earning implies that he is making it by winning competitive matches against reasonably credible opponents. Really, $kala is just giving Kimbo his bread at this point. Or, if you’re cheesy enough to go there, Shaw is just feeding the guy.
His opponent last night was a Lamar, Arkansas pugilist named Jesse Porter*, who entered the bout with a 3-4 professional boxing record. Porter had never gone the distance in his boxing career, with all seven fights ending by knockout. Furthermore, he was coming off of a knockout loss to Lee Bagan forty two seconds into the second round of their bout, which marked the longest that Porter had lasted in a fight he lost.
Kimbo Slice is now 5-0 as a professional boxer, while Jesse Porter gets to drift back into obscurity where he belongs. But look on the bright side: It was a quick fight that delivered a knockout, and both fighters got paid more for this bout than I got paid to mock it. There’s (something resembling) dignity in knowing that.
* There’s actually some confusion as to who the hapless can was. A lot of sites are reporting that 1-0 boxer Richard Dawson was his opponent last night instead of Jesse Porter. AllTheBestFights.com’s review of the bout sums up the confusion with the unintentionally hilarious ”at the moment we don’t know exactly who is his opponent”. In a way, that’s probably for the best.
It’s looking like current Bellator middleweight champion and world renowned can-crusher Hector Lombard may finally get his chance to make waves in the UFC. Yes, it seems the man who has vowed to “take Anderson Silva’s head off” was recently offered a contract with the UFC in light of his dispute-ridden contract with Bellator expiring earlier this month. The Cuban-born knockout artist has been out of action since steamrolling Trevor Prangley in the second round of their catchweight non-title affair back in November of 2011, and has still yet to grant season five middleweight tournament winner Alexander Shlemenko his much deserved rematch. We can likely call that one a wash at this point.
And although that sucks for Shlemenko, we’ve got to admit that we’d much rather see “Lightning” in the UFC. If you recall, Lombard was supposed to make his promotional debut way back at UFC 78 in November of 2007 against Karo Parisyan, but Visa issues forced him to withdraw after he was denied entry into the country. He was eventually replaced by Ryo Chonan, who couldn’t handle “The Heat” and was defeated by unanimous decision.
Five years and countless corpses of MMA journeyman later, we may finally see Lombard live up to his potential.
But before we start setting ourselves up for disappointment, we (and the UFC) are awaiting a move from the Bellator brass, who still have an opportunity to match the UFC’s offer. Bellator CEO told Sherdog that a “strategic decision” would determine Lombard’s future with the company, but that they wouldn’t even begin deliberation until after this weekend’s Bellator 66 event:
We’ve received the final proposed UFC agreement from Hector’s attorney, and right now we are in the process of reviewing it to determine whether we’re going to match the agreement. We’ve got the 60 pages of UFC contract that were forwarded to us by Hector’s counsel.
Out of respect for Hector, I think we will turn [the UFC contract] around very quickly. Obviously, we have a huge event coming up Friday. As soon as that is over, we will sit down with our partners and go through the UFC contract line-for-line and make a strategic decision whether we’re going to match it or pass. [If we pass, we will] wish him the best and let him go knock out everybody in the UFC.
It’s looking like current Bellator middleweight champion and world renowned can-crusher Hector Lombard may finally get his chance to make waves in the UFC. Yes, it seems the man who has vowed to “take Anderson Silva’s head off” was recently offered a contract with the UFC in light of his dispute-ridden contract with Bellator expiring earlier this month. The Cuban-born knockout artist has been out of action since steamrolling Trevor Prangley in the second round of their catchweight non-title affair back in November of 2011, and has still yet to grant season five middleweight tournament winner Alexander Shlemenko his much deserved rematch. We can likely call that one a wash at this point.
And although that sucks for Shlemenko, we’ve got to admit that we’d much rather see “Lightning” in the UFC. If you recall, Lombard was supposed to make his promotional debut way back at UFC 78 in November of 2007 against Karo Parisyan, but Visa issues forced him to withdraw after he was denied entry into the country. He was eventually replaced by Ryo Chonan, who couldn’t handle “The Heat” and was defeated by unanimous decision.
Five years and countless corpses of MMA journeyman later, we may finally see Lombard live up to his potential.
But before we start setting ourselves up for disappointment, we (and the UFC) are awaiting a move from the Bellator brass, who still have an opportunity to match the UFC’s offer. Bellator CEO told Sherdog that a “strategic decision” would determine Lombard’s future with the company, but that they wouldn’t even begin deliberation until after this weekend’s Bellator 66 event:
We’ve received the final proposed UFC agreement from Hector’s attorney, and right now we are in the process of reviewing it to determine whether we’re going to match the agreement. We’ve got the 60 pages of UFC contract that were forwarded to us by Hector’s counsel.
Out of respect for Hector, I think we will turn [the UFC contract] around very quickly. Obviously, we have a huge event coming up Friday. As soon as that is over, we will sit down with our partners and go through the UFC contract line-for-line and make a strategic decision whether we’re going to match it or pass. [If we pass, we will] wish him the best and let him go knock out everybody in the UFC.
When reviewing the situation, Rebney was very aware of the value Lombard holds in his promotion, but wants to assure the media that there would be no hard feelings between Lombard and Bellator were he to leave:
The reality is that Hector is going to do extremely well whether he is fighting in the Octagon or the Bellator circle, and I think everybody knew that. He’s one of the best middleweights on the face of the earth. He hasn’t fought in a long time, and he had to wait through these periods contractually to get to a point where he could go out and seek an offer from a competing organization.
We’ve been waiting on the actual contract itself to see all of the specifics and every conceivable detail and know exactly what is being offered. Now we have something really specific to look at.
We don’t want to wish any ill will towards our buddy Bjorn, but needless to say, we would really like the chance to see Hector prove (or disprove) himself against a fighter who is somewhere close to his skill level. Bellator hasn’t provided that since the first Shlemenko fight, which was absolutely dominated by Lombard. And let’s face it, after Anderson Silva guides Chael Sonnen to a higher plane of existence at UFC 147, the UFC’s middleweight division will be all but dried up. Unless you think Vitor Belfort, Brian Stann, or Mark Munoz actually stand a chance at beating Anderson, in which case, you likely eat your food through a straw and still think The Rolling Stones sound great live.
So what do you guys think about this? Will Hector do work in the UFC or prove his haters right?
(“I’m here to pick up your daughter. Or your son. Whoever’s free.”)
After a woefully shitty performance against Edwin Figueroa at UFC Live: Hardy vs. Lytle, Jason Reinhardt has officially been released by the UFC. It was Reinhardt’s third loss in the Octagon — in three different weight classes. At 41, he was the oldest active fighter in the UFC.
Reinhardt began his career as a wrecking ball in midwestern regional promotions, racking up an astounding 18-0 record with all wins by stoppage. (It should be noted that only five of his opponents had winning records, and about half were making their MMA debuts.) Though Reinhardt was originally signed to fight Roger Huerta at UFC 63 in 2006, a neck injury delayed his debut until the following year, where he was quickly choked out by Joe Lauzon at UFC 78.
Reinhardt returned to the midwest to beat up a couple more nobodies in local shows, and was inactive for a couple years nursing injuries. In February 2011, the UFC had Jason back as a featherweight, throwing him against Tiequan Zhang. Reinhardt lost by submission (again), this time in just 48 seconds. The UFC gave him one more chance earlier this month, this time at bantamweight against Edwin Figueroa. Reinhardt ran around the cage until Figueroa finally caught up to him and TKO’d him in the second round.
Also, he gave his parents crabs once. For real. That charming little story is after the jump, as told by Jason himself while wearing a coon-skin cap.
(“I’m here to pick up your daughter. Or your son. Whoever’s free.”)
After a woefully shitty performance against Edwin Figueroa at UFC Live: Hardy vs. Lytle, Jason Reinhardt has officially been released by the UFC. It was Reinhardt’s third loss in the Octagon — in three different weight classes. At 41, he was the oldest active fighter in the UFC.
Reinhardt began his career as a wrecking ball in midwestern regional promotions, racking up an astounding 18-0 record with all wins by stoppage. (It should be noted that only five of his opponents had winning records, and about half were making their MMA debuts.) Though Reinhardt was originally signed to fight Roger Huerta at UFC 63 in 2006, a neck injury delayed his debut until the following year, where he was quickly choked out by Joe Lauzon at UFC 78.
Reinhardt returned to the midwest to beat up a couple more nobodies in local shows, and was inactive for a couple years nursing injuries. In February 2011, the UFC had Jason back as a featherweight, throwing him against Tiequan Zhang. Reinhardt lost by submission (again), this time in just 48 seconds. The UFC gave him one more chance earlier this month, this time at bantamweight against Edwin Figueroa. Reinhardt ran around the cage until Figueroa finally caught up to him and TKO’d him in the second round.
Also, he gave his parents crabs once. For real. That charming little story is after the jump, as told by Jason himself while wearing a coon-skin cap.
Can-crusher (n.): MMA fighter who makes his reputation by destroying the weak and inexperienced, but falls apart when faced with an opponent who’s half-decent. In no particular order, here are the eight fighters who have defined "can-crushing&quo…
Can-crusher (n.): MMA fighter who makes his reputation by destroying the weak and inexperienced, but falls apart when faced with an opponent who’s half-decent. In no particular order, here are the eight fighters who have defined "can-crushing" more than anybody else in the sport, beginning with one who should still be very fresh in your minds…
BRANDON VERA (11-6) Notable cans crushed in the last three years: Reese Andy, Mike Patt Biggest win in the last three years: Krzysztof Soszynski Recent losses: Thiago Silva, Jon Jones, Randy Couture A cautionary tale about believing your own hype, Brandon Vera’s career has unfolded in two distinct phases: The "sky’s the limit" phase, in which Vera hacked through every opponent in his path, culminating in his beat-down of former champ Frank Mir at UFC 65 — and the "when is this dude getting fired?" phase, marked by contract disputes, unchecked ego, underwhelming performances, and a half-dozen losses. Following the Thiago Silva fight at UFC 125, we expect the Truth to be sent back down to the minors where he can prey on scrubs for a while.
ALEKSANDER EMELIANENKO (17-4) Notable cans crushed in the last three years: Miodrag Petkovic, Eddy Bengtsson, Ibragim Magomedov, Sang Soo Lee Biggest win in the last three years: Honestly, he hasn’t beaten anybody worth mentioning. Recent loss: Peter Graham Fedor’s younger brother built a fearsome reputation in PRIDE for his ice-cold demeanor and lightning-fast knockouts of equally scary-looking mofos like James Thompson and Ricardo Morais. But ever since he left the Japanese scene in 2006 to compete almost exclusively in Europe, his career has drifted steadily out of relevance. A 2008 deal with Affliction signaled a return to meaningful competition, but it didn’t work out — reportedly because of health issues that he has denied ever since. His painful loss to Peter Graham last month suggested that even his can-crushing days might be coming to an end.
