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Roy Nelson and Shane Carwin Announced as Coaches for ‘TUF 16: Fat David vs. Goliath’

(For his final masterpiece, Michelangelo decided to pay tribute to the Biblical hero’s fall from grace through the medium of hamstone. The results were shocking, yet delicious.)

As is likely the case for most of you, we here at CagePotato are more than willing to admit that we all but completely missed out on the failed experiment that was TUF Live. The placement of the show on Friday nights, the rehashed trash-talk and pranks between coaches; it just seemed all too played out and tired to really get us hooked. The fact that Dominick Cruz tore his ACL with only a couple episodes to go only furthered our belief that the season would have been a complete loss if not for the uplifting story of the season’s lightweight winner, Don Cheadle (or something like that).

So when Dana White informed USA TODAY Sports yesterday that the coaches for this season would be polar opposite heavyweights Roy Nelson and Shane Carwin, it more than piqued our interest. Aside from being the winner of the show’s tenth (and arguably least talent filled) season, TUF: Heavyweights, Nelson is by all accounts, one entertaining and funny sumbitch. Carwin, on the other hand, has shown before that he is up for a good joshing as long as it is not aimed at him. If you recall, the last time we got on Carwin’s bad side, Old Dad packed up his things, fled, faked his death, died his eyebrows, and attended his own funeral as a man named Phil Schiffley. The last we heard, he was still reporting on all things MMA from a one man vessel in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean out of fear that “The Engineer” was still looking for him. So clearly, the potential for hilarity between these two on the set is higher than Nelson’s cholesterol levels.

(For his final masterpiece, Michelangelo decided to pay tribute to the Biblical hero’s fall from grace through the medium of hamstone. The results were shocking, yet delicious.)

And although Carwin did in fact take a year away from action following his UFC 131 loss to Junior Dos Santos to search the world over for Fowlkes, he also spent a good deal of time rehabilitating his back. Coincidentally, it was this very injury that forced him out of his original matchup with Nelson at UFC 125.

“Big Country” most recently found his way back to the win column with a first round knockout of Dave Herman at UFC 146. Just 2-3 in his past five, Nelson certainly won’t be looking at a title shot with a win over Carwin, but a victory would undoubtedly be one of the biggest, if not the biggest, of his Zuffa career.

And in other TUF coaching news…

For those of you who didn’t stick around to catch the post-fight show on FUEL TV last night, DW also announced that the coaches for the second international season of TUF, which will see fighters from the UK square off against Australia’s finest, will be TUF 9 winner Ross Pearson and TUF 6 standout George Sotiropoulus. Both men have fallen on hard times as of late, with G Sots dropping his past two to Dennis Siver (via decision) and Rafael Dos Anjos (via lawn chair KO). After dropping to featherweight following a 4-2 UFC stint at lightweight and scoring a unanimous decision victory over Junior Assuncao, Pearson most recently screwed our parlay over royally when he was knocked out by Cub Swanson in the second round of their tilt at UFC on FX 4.

So, Potato Nation, do these matchups do anything for you?

–J. Jones

Roy Nelson, Shane Carwin to Serve as Coaches on the Ultimate Fighter 16

Get ready for a little more Big Country on your television screens.UFC heavyweights Roy Nelson and Shane Carwin have been selected as the coaches for the next season of The Ultimate Fighter.Sources close to the show informed Bleacher Report of the news…

Get ready for a little more Big Country on your television screens.

UFC heavyweights Roy Nelson and Shane Carwin have been selected as the coaches for the next season of The Ultimate Fighter.

Sources close to the show informed Bleacher Report of the news on Wednesday. USA Today confirmed the news in Thursday morning’s print edition of the newspaper.

The pair will headline the second season of the show on FX, which is scheduled to premiere in the fall.

Carwin has been out of action since losing a title eliminator bout to Junior dos Santos in 2011. Nelson, meanwhile, last appeared at UFC 146 in May, where he scored a knockout win over Dave Herman.

Read more MMA news on BleacherReport.com

Roy Nelson Calls Out Mike Russow (?) for the Right to Remain at 265 lbs.

(It took Roy 45 minutes and three chipped teeth to realize that his TUF trophy was not made of rock candy.)

This town ain’t big enough for the two of them. Literally. The town we’re referring to, of course, would be the UFC’s heavyweight division.

Let’s face it, we are currently in the era of TRT-jacked-up super Goliaths, and aside from making us common folk feel more self-conscious about our own physiques, these monsters are putting forth the idea that you have to be sculpted by the Gods themselves in order to be a successful athlete. How dare they. But there is hope, because one man has been vigorously doing the work that the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance could never even dream of doing in between trips to the buffet line. Mainly, proving that obese individuals are capable of doing more than legally stealing electrically powered wheelchairs from crippled people at the supermarket. That man is Roy “Big Country” Nelson.

Obviously fearing that fellow portly contender Mike Russow is beginning to encroach on his Burger King and Taco Bell sponsorships, as well as the “Lifetime Achievement” distinction he was set to receive at next year’s Cici’s Pizza Awards, Nelson has thrown down a good old fashioned “loser leaves town” challenge to Russow over his Twitter. The winner gets to continue eating pull pork sandwiches until they look like the gluttony victim in Seven, and the loser must drop to the land of rice cakes and milk without chocolate syrup that is the light heavyweight division.

(It took Roy 45 minutes and three chipped teeth to realize that his TUF trophy was not made of rock candy.)

This town ain’t big enough for the two of them. Literally. The town we’re referring to, of course, would be the UFC’s heavyweight division.

Here’s what he wrote:

I want Mike Russow and loser goes to 205 or becomes Dana White Rich. Let make it happen @danawhite

While it may be in bad taste to call someone out immediately after they have suffered their first UFC loss (by knockout, nonetheless), there’s no denying that this is an intriguing matchup, made even more intriguing by the possible ramifications of either man losing. Being that Russow only fights part time, we’re not sure if he’d actually be able to make the cut to 205, but Nelson, on the other hand, has shown a willingness to at least consider dropping to light heavyweight if the circumstances are ~~ridiculous enough~~ just right.

On an unrelated sidenote, what the hell does Dana White rich mean, and how would either man become so by losing their next fight? Also, Rhode Island, neither a road nor an island. Discuss.

On the heels of a first round knockout of Dave Herman at UFC 146, the TUF 10 winner’s UFC record currently stands at a mediocre 4-3, so a win over Russow would be enough to delay his own trip to 205 for at least a couple more months. One thing standing in the way of this possible matchup, however, would be the UFC’s usual policy of placing winners against winners and losers against losers. Then again, crazier fights have been booked, so it wouldn’t be completely out of left field for them to book Nelson vs. Russow in a battle for potbellied supremacy, right?

Who do you like for this one, Potato Nation?

–J. Jones

‘Long Hair Don’t Care’ Doesn’t apply to MMA according to complaint against Clay Guida

When the UFC was first created, they lived up to their tagline, “There are no rules.” But as scrutiny and protest continued, the inevitable arrival of rules and regulations were implemented gradually, if the UFC expected to grow and reform. However, with all rules, there are gray areas, and therefore cases with state athletic commissions.

Clay Guida and Gray Maynard are expected to face each other in the octagon at UFC on FX 4 this Friday. About a month ago, Maynard’s camp made a complaint to the New Jersey State Athletic Control Board that has just recently come into fruition. The complaint regarded Guida’s famous locks. Maynard’s camp believes that Guida’s long hair proves as an unfair advantage in the octagon, and creates a distraction for his opponent. While Maynard claims to have had no knowledge of this complaint until it hit the media, I find it hard to believe.

In some respects, looking at the unified rules in black and white, it makes sense. Fighters are supposed to maintain a clean, tidy appearance, and if the head or facial hair proves to be a hazard, or interferes with the contest, the fighter isn’t allowed to fight until the commission approves of any and all changes. I can see how hair could be distracting for another fighter, especially one with such an unorthodox style such as Clay Guida’s. As of UFC 15, hair pulling was banned from the sport. Dealing with a fighter with longer hair would put strain on the opponent, making sure to avoid accidentally pulling or catching the hair. This could give an advantage to the opponent with long hair, as the other fighter would have to be careful with submissions and ground game.

On the other hand, it is just hair. It seems very trivial to pick out something so minute in an opponent, as Clay Guida has never had a problem with an opponent in the history of his career. He did, however, have a slight issue when UFC undisputed didn’t put Guida in the game because designing his hair posed too much of a problem. Dana White has suggested the fighter cut his locks, offering him a sweet deal of $10,000. However, Guida still sports his trademark hair. A number of fighters in the organization also have long hair including: Roy Nelson, Cody McKenzie, Louis Gaudinot, Benson Henderson, and Urijah Faber (until recently). In most instances with other fighters, it hasn’t posed a problem.

To avoid conflict, Clay Guida has agreed to braid his hair back for the fight. While he wasn’t ecstatic about it, he was understanding, and did what had to be done to continue with this fight. With other rules being targeted and reinforced in recent years, it is safe to assume that the unified rules will eventually have clarification on hair, and whether or not it needs to always be tied back. While this seems like a trivial matter, appearance of a fighter in MMA can have just as much impact on the sport as the fight itself- just ask Dana White what he thought about Dennis Hallman’s attire choice at UFC 133.

By: Emily Kapala

MMA: Top 15 Knockouts of 2012 (So Far)

It is about half-way through 2012 now, so why not mark the half-New Year with some discussion over the best knockouts fans have seen so far? It is worth pointing out that though there are fifteen on this list (alongside an honorable mention), there wer…

It is about half-way through 2012 now, so why not mark the half-New Year with some discussion over the best knockouts fans have seen so far?

It is worth pointing out that though there are fifteen on this list (alongside an honorable mention), there were many knockouts that could have made it on this list. However, reducing it down to this number was no easy task, so do not feel as though any given absence from this list is a slight directed toward your favorite fighter.

It is also worth pointing out that even though they are numbered, again, there were a lot of fights to pour over and then to write about. Just because you totally thought the No. 9 knockout was “so way totally” cooler than No. 7 does not mean that this writer is hatin’.

Just sit back and enjoy the list!

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Alistair Overeem: 5 Fights for Him to Take Upon His Return

When Alistair Overeem returns from serving out his sentence for failing a drug test, his first fight back could be contingent on fan reception and organizational forgiveness.If Dana White finds himself in a charitable mood, maybe he’ll throw Over…

When Alistair Overeem returns from serving out his sentence for failing a drug test, his first fight back could be contingent on fan reception and organizational forgiveness.

If Dana White finds himself in a charitable mood, maybe he’ll throw Overeem a meatball to kick around. Nothing erases the stain of a hot urinalysis better than a devastating knockout victory.

However, if Uncle Dana is still perturbed that Overeem lied to his face and ruined a huge title fight, then he could end up throwing Overeem to a wolf.

Here are five great fights for the bruising Dutchman when he returns.

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