(The knockout comes so quickly, they’ve replayed it for you a dozen times at the end. Video: YouTube/TheHypoparody)
Former UFC fighter (sigh)Kimbo Slice threw his second punch as a professional boxer last night, and with it he secured his second victory. I’ll say this for the bearded one: he’s efficient. For those thinking that Slice has the “sweet science” figured out, I would contend that his management and promoters are the ones wearing the lab coats. Their formula? Take one-part YouTube legend, mix with one part Glass Joe, agitate for 20 seconds, and call it a night.
Kimbo’s first opponent, James Wade, was an impressive 0-1 when he fell to a single bread-bomb in just 17 seconds. Last night, Slice was paired against the more formidable Tay Bledsoe, who stepped into the ring two wins under his belt. Sure, he’d also been knocked out thrice, in the three bouts leading up to the Kimbo fight, with two of those losses coming in under two minutes, but who’s counting? Slice dropped Bledsoe cold with an overhand right just 1:52 into the bout.
The hand speed, the footwork, are we looking at Sugar Ray Slice?
(The knockout comes so quickly, they’ve replayed it for you a dozen times at the end. Video: YouTube/TheHypoparody)
Former UFC fighter (sigh)Kimbo Slice threw his second punch as a professional boxer last night, and with it he secured his second victory. I’ll say this for the bearded one: he’s efficient. For those thinking that Slice has the “sweet science” figured out, I would contend that his management and promoters are the ones wearing the lab coats. Their formula? Take one-part YouTube legend, mix with one part Glass Joe, agitate for 20 seconds, and call it a night.
Kimbo’s first opponent, James Wade, was an impressive 0-1 when he fell to a single bread-bomb in just 17 seconds. Last night, Slice was paired against the more formidable Tay Bledsoe, who stepped into the ring with two wins under his belt. Sure, he’d also been knocked out thrice, in the three bouts leading up to the Kimbo fight, with two of those losses coming in under two minutes, but who’s counting? Slice dropped Bledsoe cold with an overhand right just 1:52 into the bout.
The hand speed, the footwork, are we looking at Sugar Ray Slice?
(Lindland, weaseling his way out of a fight with the Grim Reaper)
UFC middleweight Chael Sonnen may believe he can talk his way into another battle with Anderson Silva, but he has no illusions that he’s already secured the rematch. While “The American Gangster” continues to call out the champion as often as possible, fellow Team Quest member Matt Lindland is piling the pressure on Silva.
Black House manager Ed Soares has made it clear in recent interviews that Chael has already had his shot at the belt and that it would be a shame to squander any of Anderson’s few remaining bouts. According to “The Law”, not only is Sonnen the number one contender, but it may take a contractual mandate to force Silva into that fight.
(Lindland, weaseling his way out of a fight with the Grim Reaper)
UFC middleweight Chael Sonnen may believe he can talk his way into another battle with Anderson Silva, but he has no illusions that he’s already secured the rematch. While “The American Gangster” continues to call out the champion as often as possible, fellow Team Quest member Matt Lindland is piling the pressure on Silva.
Black House manager Ed Soares has made it clear in recent interviews that Chael has already had his shot at the belt and that it would be a shame to squander any of Anderson’s few remaining bouts. According to “The Law”, not only is Sonnen the number one contender, but it may take a contractual mandate to force Silva into that fight.
In an interview with MMAHQ.com, Lindland had this to say:
“Anderson will to find a way to weasel out of that fight. I don’t know what his contractual obligations are as far as who he has to fight as a champion but they’re already laying the ground work; I mean look at the article that came out this morning on Bloody Elbow.
His manager Ed Soares is already making excuses for Anderson to not take that fight so yeah I think they’re going to try to weasel out of it. I don’t know what his obligations are contractually to the UFC but his obligations to the fans are that he needs to take that fight.
Everyone of the fans know that Chael’s the number one contender and the guy that has a chance of beating him, can beat him and exposed his weaknesses in that fight. The fans want to see that fight and Anderson owes the fans that fight.”
While eliminating Sonnen and Belfort from the “The Spider’s” list of potential challengers, Soares doesn’t offer much in terms of opponents he deems worthy. He mentions the names GSP and Henderson, but GSP has challenges ahead of him in his own division and seems hesitant about the jump up in weight, and even if Henderson gets past Shogun he hasn’t exactly been active at Middleweight lately.
Is there any challenger that makes more sense than Sonnen at this point?
When discussing his fourth round tapout loss to UFC Light Heavyweight Champ Jon Jones, Rampage Jackson explained that he lets no man put him to sleep because he doesn’t trust people. I’m not exactly certain what Jackson fears might unfold once he goes out, but vile atrocities such as antiquing and billboarding have been perpetrated on unconscious fighters before. But there’s a certain amount of trust that goes into tapping out as well. The tapout is nothing more than a gentlemen’s agreement, really, in which one fighter admits that he’s taken enough punishment for one day. But not everyone in the face-punching business is a gentleman, and sometimes your opponent may not agree that you’ve taken all of the damage you deserve.
When you hold a submission too long there’s a chance of causing damage to a limb or unconsciousness, but it always leads to hurt feelings.
(A little club soda will get that right out.)
When discussing his fourth round tapout loss to UFC Light Heavyweight Champ Jon Jones, Rampage Jackson explained that he lets no man put him to sleep because he doesn’t trust people. I’m not exactly certain what Jackson fears might unfold once he goes out, but vile atrocities such as antiquing and billboarding have been perpetrated on unconscious fighters before. But there’s a certain amount of trust that goes into tapping out as well. The tapout is nothing more than a gentlemen’s agreement, really, in which one fighter admits that he’s taken enough punishment for one day. But not everyone in the face-punching business is a gentleman, and sometimes your opponent may not agree that you’ve taken all of the damage you deserve.
When you hold a submission too long there’s a chance of causing damage to a limb or unconsciousness, but it always leads to hurt feelings.
Renato Sobral vs. David Heath
(Click the photo for the video, and if you can translate the embed code get at me in the comments section)
Bad blood: This is probably the best known example of a fighter refusing to let go of a submission, yet most of the facts surrounding the incident are nonsense. You know how the story goes, right? Heath capped off a bevy of pre-fight trash talk by walking out to the weigh-ins in a shirt featuring Babalu’s recent mug shot. Or did he? This fight took place at UFC 74, ironically titled “Respect”. The event featured Couture-Gonzaga and GSP-Koscheck I, which means there were probably a few cameras in the stands, yet there are more photos of Dana wearing a “Free Cage Potato” shirt than of Heath in his mocking garb. According to Heath, a fan gave him such a shirt but “it never saw the light of day”. Several websites ran stories regarding Heath wearing the shirt, but later printed retractions as it simply was not true. I was there in the stands when they hit the scales, and I certainly don’t remember it.
As for pre-fight interviews where Heath talked trash, I couldn’t find anything other than this second-hand quote credited to an interview from UFC.com: “I think he’s a helluva fighter and I like his style tremendously. The guy’s as accomplished as they get, and he’s the type of guy up and coming fighters like me look at and hope that they have a career similar to his. I’ve got all the respect in the world for the guy and I can’t wait to fight him.” Pretty harsh stuff. The weigh-ins did get heated, but it was hardly a one-way street and nothing we haven’t seen before.
The fight: It didn’t take Babalu long to get this fight to the ground, and once there he went to work with punches, hammer fists and elbows from the guard. Once reversed, the Brazilian continued to rattle off strikes and submission attempts from his back, though Heath landed a shot or two of his own. Sobral secured a takedown early in round two and quickly opened up a horrific cut on Heath’s forehead. The mat soon resembled the floor of a slaughterhouse in one of the bloodiest fights to date. Heath worked his way up only to get caught in an anaconda choke and rolled back to the floor. With nowhere to go he tapped out, but Sobral ignored Mazaggatti’s attempts to end the fight and held the choke until his opponent was out cold.
In his own words: If Babalu was feeling guilty about what he’d done, he did a good job of hiding it in his post-fight interview with Joe Rogan. “I did what I did, because this guys a pretty young fighter; I’ve been in this game for ten years and he had no respect for me. He called me a “motherfucker.” When asked by Joe Rogan if he put him to sleep on purpose even though Heath tapped, Sobral responded: “Yes. He has to learn respect.” Still not thinking through the consequences of his words, Babalu inspected his work on the jumbotron and added: “Yes. That’s what I did. He deserved that shit.”
Payback’s a bitch: Sobral’s denial of intentional wrongdoing at his Nevada State Athletic Commission hearing–despite his own taped admission of the crime–set the bar high for Chael Sonnen’s future pleas of innocence. Despite his claims that he didn’t feel the tap and that he released the hold as soon as he noticed the ref’s involvement, he didn’t get off so easily. The NSAC fined him $25k (half of his purse for the fight) and his contract with the UFC was terminated. As if that wasn’t enough, he was later made the victim of a horrible post-fight atrocity himself.
After weeks of height-related gags, Struve still wasn’t done rubbing his length advantage in Barry’s face. (Photo: Tracy Lee via Yahoo Sports!)
Sandwiched between two marquee UFC cards, last night’s UFC Live flew under the promotional radar. It’s understandable that Zuffa would focus more on two stacked pay per view cards than a Versus broadcast, but in a time when fights are hyped for months only to fall short when the bell rings, it’s rare to see a card that delivers so much action from Facebook to the main event. Add to the mix that there was gold on the line and the lack of promotion for this event is borderline criminal. Only two fights on the card were decided by the judges—though just as many were decided by the referees—and either of them could have earned FOTN honors. We’ve got a lot to cover, so hunker down.
First off, I’d like to welcome back an old friend. Elbows, we’d nearly forgotten about you, but last night you were ushered back into society like the queen of a violent debutant ball. Bored with simply working on teeth, “The Dentist” performed a full-facial extraction via elbow on Keith Wisniewski during the Facebook broadcast. Cut stoppages aren’t my favorite, but these ‘bows we’re seeing from the clinch are brutal, damage inflicting blows that you’ve got to stop before they stop you, and I like them. Speaking of which…
After weeks of height-related gags, Struve still wasn’t done rubbing his length advantage in Barry’s face. (Photo: Tracy Lee via Yahoo Sports!)
Sandwiched between two marquee UFC cards, last night’s UFC Live flew under the promotional radar. It’s understandable that Zuffa would focus more on two stacked pay per view cards than a Versus broadcast, but in a time when fights are hyped for months only to fall short when the bell rings, it’s rare to see a card that delivers so much action from Facebook to the main event. Add to the mix that there was gold on the line and the lack of promotion for this event is borderline criminal. Only two fights on the card were decided by the judges—though just as many were decided by the referees—and either of them could have earned FOTN honors. We’ve got a lot to cover, so hunker down.
First off, I’d like to welcome back an old friend. Elbows, we’d nearly forgotten about you, but last night you were ushered back into society like the queen of a violent debutant ball. Bored with simply working on teeth, “The Dentist” performed a full-facial extraction via elbow on Keith Wisniewski during the Facebook broadcast. Cut stoppages aren’t my favorite, but these ‘bows we’re seeing from the clinch are brutal, damage inflicting blows that you’ve got to stop before they stop you, and I like them. Speaking of which…
Mac Danzig and Matt Wiman opened the broadcast with an outstanding rematch that saw both men fighting for the finish. Much of the bout was spent in the clinch with Wiman throwing heavy elbows with bad intent. Danzig answered with combinations and body shots, but Wiman got better of the exchanges. The action didn’t lull when the fighters hit the mat, and though Wiman attempted a few close submissions in the second round it was Danzig who nearly ended the fight with a guillotine as the final bell rang. Wiman got his hand raised, but both men earned the $65k “Fight of the Night” bonus.
For most of his 2:49 second bout, Charlie Brenneman got his face grated against the canvas and bombed on from all angles, and that was the high point for “The Spaniard”. Johnson bullied Brenneman around like his kid brother, securing a dominant position off of a stuffed takedown and landing shots at his leisure. When he scrambled back to his feet, Brenneman was greeted with a head kick that sent him scrambling back to the mat. Once back on wobbly legs, another head kick sent him tumbling backwards. It was a forceful, undefended blow to an already-rocked opponent, but Mario Yamasaki made the decision to stop the fight while Brenneman was in mid-air. Had he waited a second longer, he may have seen that “The Spaniard” braced himself on impact with the mat and was prepared to defend himself. A tough call to make in the moment? I’m sure it is, but that’s what we expect of high-level officials, and where was his concern for fighter safety earlier in the evening? It certainly wasn’t a knockout, but it was the “Knock Out of the Night”.
Freakshow bouts are a roll of the dice, and outside of its wild finish the Barry-Struve bout did not deliver. Both fought a cautious first round, with “HD” trying to work his way inside and Struve largely content to keep him at bay with front kicks. When the two finally clinched up in round two, Struve nicely transitioned from standing darce attempt to a guillotine to a deep triangle. Barry’s Rampagesque counter was exciting, but the power bomb only served to tighten up the choke. Struve earned his fourteenth submission win and “Submission of the Night” honors. This was Barry’s second consecutive stoppage defeat.
After being put into a heavyweight-induced coma last week, Cruz and Johnson gave us a clear reminder that the lighter weight classes are where the action is. This was billed as a fight between MMA’s fastest fighters, and as predicted it looked a lot like one of those cartoon fights that takes place in a cloud of smoke with only the occasional limb popping out. For a full twenty five minutes their bout exhibited the sort of wild transitions and blazing speed that only my exes can fully appreciate. Johnson’s hustle and pressure forced Cruz to abandon his herky-jerky footwork, but the champion adapted and put on an incredible display of grappling superiority, landing two picturesque German suplexes and ten total takedowns throughout the bout. This marks Cruz’s fourth consecutive title defense, all the more impressive considering he broke his hand in the first round.
Bantamweight Championship bout: Dominick Cruz def. Demetrious ‘Mighty Mouse’ Johnson via Unanimous Decision (50-45, 49-46, 50-45)
Heavyweight bout: Stefan Struve def. Pat Barry via Submission (Triangle choke) – R2 @ 3:22
Welterweight bout: Anthony Johnson def. Charlie Brenneman via TKO (Head Kick) – R1 @ 2:49
Lightweight bout: Matt Wiman def. Mac Danzig via Unanimous Decision (29-28, 29-28, 29-28)
Preliminary Card (Facebook.com/UFC)
Lightweight bout: Yves Edwards def. Rafaello Oliveira via TKO (Punches) – R2 @ 2:44
Lightweight bout: Paul Sass def. Michael Johnson via Submission (Heel hook) – R1 @ 3:00
Catchweight (138 lbs) bout: Mike Easton def. Byron Bloodworth via TKO (Knee-Punches) – R2 @ 4:52
Lightweight bout: T.J. Grant def. Shane Roller via Submission (Verbal Submission) – R3 @ 2:12
Welterweight bout: Josh Neer def. Keith Wisniewski via TKO (Doctor Stoppage) – R2 @ 5:00
Bantamweight bout: Walel Watson def. Joseph Sandoval via TKO (Kick/Punches) – R1 @ 1:17
Have you ever been watching an MMA fight and found yourself thinking, “Yeah, this is cool and all, but I wonder what it would be like if these dudes were strapped to a cocktail table and had zero training”? Well, today is your lucky day. Freshly resurrected from the MMA graveyard is “XARM”.
XARM is the brainchild of Art Davie, one of the the UFC’s original co-founders. In its first incarnation, XARM nearly usurped MMA as the next “evolution of combat sports” before abruptly calling it quits, but now the ‘extreme arm wrestling’ league has returned and is poised to take over once again.
Amazingly, they’ve found backing by experienced television producers.
Have you ever been watching an MMA fight and found yourself thinking, “Yeah, this is cool and all, but I wonder what it would be like if these dudes were strapped to a cocktail table and had zero training”? Well, today is your lucky day. Freshly resurrected from the MMA graveyard is “XARM”.
XARM is the brainchild of Art Davie, one of the the UFC’s original co-founders. In its first incarnation, XARM nearly usurped MMA as the next “evolution of combat sports” before abruptly calling it quits, but now the ‘extreme arm wrestling’ league has returned and is poised to take over once again.
Amazingly, they’ve found backing by experienced television producers. MMAJunkie.com reports that Endomol USA—responsible for such high brow projects as “Big Brother,” “Deal or No Deal,” “Fear Factor,”, and “Wipeout”–will hope to parlay their international influence to make XARM a household name in countless languages.
The promotion is planning to launch an online game and is boasting to have injected an incredible amount of new technology into the sport (spoiler: the cocktail tables are made of pure tungsten). They can add whatever in-table cameras and carbon fiber tethers they want, at the end of the day calling this a sport is a ridiculously liberal use of the word. Two guys tied down just feet from one another with restricted movement and no choice but to swing for the fences? Who would want that?
While I am looking forward to XARM dying a very public second death, I must admit that there is one MMA rematch I’d pay to see under their banner before it falls. Are there any others?
A few short days ago Dave Herman was yanked from his upcoming bout against Mike Russow following a failed drug test, and before the smoke had cleared a lively debate had sparked between our readers about marijuana’s place in the sport. We thought we’d hashed it all out and come to an understanding, but now Rodrigo “Comprido” Medeiros has weighed in on the matter with a very special PSA. According to the heavily decorated BJJ champion, those of you who lobbied in favor of mixing grass and grappling are stupid and suffer from low self-esteem. To be fair, Comprido, pretty much everyone here at the Potato Nation is stupid and suffers from low self-esteem; it’s kind of our “thing”.
“[I] just want to make this very clear: Eddie Bravo is an idiot. Ok? Using drugs don’t improve the performance of a fighter. If you want to build your self-confidence, you’re going to do sports, do martial arts, but never use drugs.”
A few short days ago Dave Herman was yanked from his upcoming bout against Mike Russow following a failed drug test, and before the smoke had cleared a lively debate had sparked between our readers about marijuana’s place in the sport. We thought we’d hashed it all out and come to an understanding, but now Rodrigo “Comprido” Medeiros has weighed in on the matter with a very special PSA. According to the heavily decorated BJJ champion, those of you who lobbied in favor of mixing grass and grappling are stupid and suffer from low self-esteem. To be fair, Comprido, pretty much everyone here at the Potato Nation is stupid and suffers from low self-esteem; it’s kind of our “thing”.
“[I] just want to make this very clear: Eddie Bravo is an idiot. Ok? Using drugs don’t improve the performance of a fighter. If you want to build your self-confidence, you’re going to do sports, do martial arts, but never use drugs.”
“If you choke when you talk with a girl, you should go to the gym, and train, and build your self-confidence. Not use a fake medicine, or use a fake drug, to feel better than you should.” (Seriously, it’s like he knows us. What’s his screen name?)
“It’s a shame that a guy who teach in martial arts, who been involved with competitions—even if he’s not competing—talk using marijuana is good for jiu jitsu. That’s bullshit. That’s probably why he’s thinking, he’s ten years ago come [up] with something [taught] by his teacher Jean Jacques Machado and he call himself an innovator. That was ten years ago. If you are a coward, you will be a coward using marijuana or not.”
Rodrigo Medeiros: not a fan of drugs, and clearly not a fan of Eddie Bravo. We could start talking now about a grudge match at ADCC, but we’ve been there before and it’s exhausting. Until someone sets up a “Stoner vs. Straight Edge” tournament, we’ll just have to settle for bickering amongst ourselves.
