Where Are They Now? The Ultimate Fighter (TUF) Winners

Find out where your favorite The Ultimate Fighter winners are now:

The post Where Are They Now? The Ultimate Fighter (TUF) Winners appeared first on LowKickMMA.com.

With the UFC having now secured a new broadcasting deal with ESPN from 2019 onwards, Dana White recently admitted that ‘The Ultimate Fighter’ show may finally be on its way out after a 27season series run.

As such, now seems like a good time to take a look back at what has become of every single one of the long-running show’s 35 ‘Ultimate Fighter’ winners to date.

Find out what your favorite past winners of TUF are up to now:

SEASON 1

Diego Sanchez

It’s a testament to Diego Sanchez’s durability that 13 years after winning TUF season 1 he remains the only fighter from that historic series to still be actively competing in the UFC, having amassed 27 fights (16-11) to date.

However, after suffering back-to-back first-round knockouts in his last two fights, it’s possible that the 36-year-old’s memorable career is now entering its final stages, though Sanchez has assured his fans that, “I’m not done yet.”


Forrest Griffin

Arguably TUF’s most iconic winner, Griffin’s fight with Stephan Bonner in the Season 1 finale was declared as the most important fight in UFC history by Dana White, while he’d also go on to win the light-heavyweight title too.

Griffin retired in 2013 at the age of 33 due to chronic injuries, but he’s since been inducted into the UFC’s Hall of Fame and now works for the UFC as their Vice President of Athletic Development.

The post Where Are They Now? The Ultimate Fighter (TUF) Winners appeared first on LowKickMMA.com.

And Now They’re Fired: Pat Healy, TUF 16 Winner Colton Smith, + More


(You just keep your surfer boy hand gestures away from my daughter, pothead! Photo via Getty.)

Ever since being screwed out of his UFC 159 win over Jim Miller (and the $130,000 in bonuses that came with it) due to a positive marijuana test (a.k.a some old bullshit), Pat Healy has seen some rough times. He’s dropped his past four contests to Khabib Nurmagomedov, Bobby Green, Jorge Masvidal, and Gleison Tibau, and while none of those were exactly gimme fights, Healy’s stock in the lightweight division has plummeted nonetheless. Unfortunately, today brings news that “Bam Bam” has been released from the UFC in light of his four-fight skid.

The losing streak seems all the more surprising given Healy’s previous run under the Strikeforce banner, which saw him score five straight wins and earn a title shot against Gil Melendez (that was eventually cancelled when the latter went down with an injury). Tough luck, kid. Here’s hoping Healy can rebound in a big way when the WSOF inevitably scoops him up.

In somewhat less surprising pink slip news, TUF 16 winner Colton Smith has been fired following his lightning quick submission loss to the Wikipedia-less Carlos Diego Ferreira at Fight Night 44 last month. Since defeating Mike Ricci to win the TUF 16 trophy back in December of 2012, Smith has dropped three straight to Robert Whittaker, Michael Chiesa, and Ferreira, all by stoppage. His most recent loss dropped his professional record to 3-4, or 6-4 if you’re the promotion attempting to make their reality show winners look like above-average fighters.

In other firing news…


(You just keep your surfer boy hand gestures away from my daughter, pothead! Photo via Getty.)

Ever since being screwed out of his UFC 159 win over Jim Miller (and the $130,000 in bonuses that came with it) due to a positive marijuana test (a.k.a some old bullshit), Pat Healy has seen some rough times. He’s dropped his past four contests to Khabib Nurmagomedov, Bobby Green, Jorge Masvidal, and Gleison Tibau, and while none of those were exactly gimme fights, Healy’s stock in the lightweight division has plummeted nonetheless. Unfortunately, today brings news that “Bam Bam” has been released from the UFC in light of his four-fight skid.

The losing streak seems all the more surprising given Healy’s previous run under the Strikeforce banner, which saw him score five straight wins and earn a title shot against Gil Melendez (that was eventually cancelled when the latter went down with an injury). Tough luck, kid. Here’s hoping Healy can rebound in a big way when the WSOF inevitably scoops him up.

In somewhat less surprising pink slip news, TUF 16 winner Colton Smith has been fired following his lightning quick submission loss to the Wikipedia-less Carlos Diego Ferreira at Fight Night 44 last month. Since defeating Mike Ricci to win the TUF 16 trophy back in December of 2012, Smith has dropped three straight to Robert Whittaker, Michael Chiesa, and Ferreira, all by stoppage. His most recent loss dropped his professional record to 3-4, or 6-4 if you’re the promotion attempting to make their reality show winners look like above-average fighters.

In addition to the release of Healy and Smith, the UFC has announced the release of three other fighters. Below are their names, followed by our reaction in gif form.

Estevan Payan: 0-3 in the UFC, with stoppage losses to Alex White, Robbie Peralta, and a decision loss to Jeremy Stephens. Payan is perhaps best known for falling victim to the *first* Bellator spinning backfist heard ’round the world.

Chris Indich: 0-2 in the UFC, with losses coming to Richard Walsh (via UD) at the TUF Nations Finale and Vik Grujic (via TKO) at Fight Night 43. I honestly have no idea who any of the people I just mentioned are.

Dave Galera: 0-1, dropped a decision to ROYSTON F*CKING WEE at Fight Night 34 back in January. ROYSTON WEE, YOU GUYS!

J. Jones

‘UFC Fight for the Troops 3? Video Highlights: Tim Kennedy Scores a Knockout for America, Rustam Khabilov Tries Some Spinnin’ Sh*t + More

(Kennedy vs. Natal finish, via YouTube.com/FoxSports)

Despite the enthusiastic and supportive Fort Campbell crowd, last night’s Fight for the Troops 3 event began with some bitter defeats for the handful of UFC fighters with military backgrounds. Army Staff Sgt./TUF 16 winner Colton Smith kicked off the main card by tapping to a rear-naked choke from TUF 15 winner Michael Chiesa — which earned Chiesa a $50,000 Submission of the Night bonus — while former Marine Liz Carmouche ate her second UFC defeat in a decision loss to Alexis Davis.

Luckily, Tim Kennedy saved the operation. The Special Forces vet fed off the energy in the room and tagged Rafael Natal with a long left hook that put the Brazilian’s lights out near the end of round 1, and won Kennedy a $50,000 Knockout of the Night bump. As he explained after the fight:

I had to wait for the crowd to stop cheering because I was afraid to emotionally commit to something and not do it for the right reasons,” he said. “They’re screaming, ‘Ranger up! Ranger up!’ And I want to start throwing overhands and blitz the guy. I was waiting for them to stop, and they didn’t stop. Then they started cheering ‘U-S-A!,’ and ‘Kennedy!,’ and I was like, ‘For the love of God.’

It had a negative effect on me because I was waiting and apprehensive. If there was any amount of pressure that could be put on a single fighter for a fight, I can’t think of a situation that would be more stressful than this.

By the way, Kennedy tore his quad in the last week of training camp, but as he told Ariel Helwani later, “There’s no way you’re getting me off this card. They would have had to shoot me. If they had to roll me up with a wheelchair, I would have got in that cage, I didn’t care.”

Check out video of Kennedy’s knockout above, check out full results from the fight card right here, and follow us after the jump for lots more UFC Fight for the Troops 3 video highlights…


(Kennedy vs. Natal finish, via YouTube.com/FoxSports)

Despite the enthusiastic and supportive Fort Campbell crowd, last night’s Fight for the Troops 3 event began with some bitter defeats for the handful of UFC fighters with military backgrounds. Army Staff Sgt./TUF 16 winner Colton Smith kicked off the main card by tapping to a rear-naked choke from TUF 15 winner Michael Chiesa — which earned Chiesa a $50,000 Submission of the Night bonus — while former Marine Liz Carmouche ate her second UFC defeat in a decision loss to Alexis Davis.

Luckily, Tim Kennedy saved the operation. The Special Forces vet fed off the energy in the room and tagged Rafael Natal with a long left hook that put the Brazilian’s lights out near the end of round 1, and won Kennedy a $50,000 Knockout of the Night bump. As he explained after the fight:

I had to wait for the crowd to stop cheering because I was afraid to emotionally commit to something and not do it for the right reasons,” he said. “They’re screaming, ‘Ranger up! Ranger up!’ And I want to start throwing overhands and blitz the guy. I was waiting for them to stop, and they didn’t stop. Then they started cheering ‘U-S-A!,’ and ‘Kennedy!,’ and I was like, ‘For the love of God.’

It had a negative effect on me because I was waiting and apprehensive. If there was any amount of pressure that could be put on a single fighter for a fight, I can’t think of a situation that would be more stressful than this.

By the way, Kennedy tore his quad in the last week of training camp, but as he told Ariel Helwani later, “There’s no way you’re getting me off this card. They would have had to shoot me. If they had to roll me up with a wheelchair, I would have got in that cage, I didn’t care.”

Check out video of Kennedy’s knockout above, check out full results from the fight card right here, and follow us after the jump for lots more UFC Fight for the Troops 3 video highlights…


(Tim Kennedy bum-rushes Rogan and Goldie’s event recap in hilarious fashion. And please, Mike, stop trying to make “The Sniper” happen. It’s not happening.)


(Cuban middleweight Yoel Romero’s just-as-nasty KO of Ronny Markes, also from the main card.)


(Rustam Khabilov shows he’s more than just “that suplex guy,” landing a sweet spinning heel kick to Jorge Masvidal’s neck. Somehow Masvidal recovered and fought on, but Khabilov still won the fight by unanimous decision, pushing his UFC record to 3-0. Both men earned $50,000 Fight of the Night bonuses for their efforts.)



(Bobby Green’s controversial TKO win over James Krause, and his post-fight interview with Joe Rogan.)


(Francisco Rivera’s second-round smash-up of George Roop.)

The UFC hasn’t posted video of Michael Chiesa’s rear-naked choke of Colton Smith, but you can see Zombie Prophet‘s GIF of the finish right here.

UFC Fight for the Troops 3 — Main Card Results & Commentary


(That’s the easy, confident smile of a guy who knows he could probably call in a drone strike if things aren’t going his way. / Photo via Facebook.com/MMAFighting)

For one night only, it’s okay to be a flag-wavin’ jackass. That’s right kids, it’s Fight for the Troops time again, and the UFC is in Fort Campbell with a card full of “us vs. them” matchups. On the menu for tonight: Army Special Forces Operator Tim Kennedy faces tennis legend Brazilian guy Rafael Natal, former Marine Liz Carmouche takes on Canadian BJJ black belt Alexis Davis, and Army Staff Sgt. Colton Smith puts the boots to a filthy, bearded hippie. Plus: A Cuban and a Russian, just to keep those boos comin’. Should be fun.

Handling play-by-play for the Fox Sports 1 main card will be our own Matt Kaplan, who will be sticking live results after the jump beginning at 7 p.m. ET / 4 p.m. PT. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest, and please shoot your own thoughts into the comments section. #murica


(That’s the easy, confident smile of a guy who knows he could probably call in a drone strike if things aren’t going his way. / Photo via Facebook.com/MMAFighting)

For one night only, it’s okay to be a flag-wavin’ jackass. That’s right kids, it’s Fight for the Troops time again, and the UFC is in Fort Campbell with a card full of “us vs. them” matchups. On the menu for tonight: Army Special Forces Operator Tim Kennedy faces tennis legend Brazilian guy Rafael Natal, former Marine Liz Carmouche takes on Canadian BJJ black belt Alexis Davis, and Army Staff Sgt. Colton Smith puts the boots to a filthy, bearded hippie. Plus: A Cuban and a Russian, just to keep those boos comin’. Should be fun.

Handling play-by-play for the Fox Sports 1 main card will be our own Matt Kaplan, who will be sticking live results after the jump beginning at 7 p.m. ET / 4 p.m. PT. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest, and please shoot your own thoughts into the comments section. #murica

PRELIMINARY CARD RESULTS
– Bobby Green def. James Krause via TKO, 3:30 of round 1 (weird finish)
– Francisco Rivera def. George Roop via TKO, 2:40 of round 2
– Dennis Bermudez def. Steven Siler via unanimous decision (30-27 x 3)
– Amanda Nunes def. Germaine de Randamie via TKO, 3:36 of round 1
– Lorenz Larkin def. Chris Camozzi via unanimous decision (30-27 x 2, 29-28)
– Yancy Medeiros def. Yves Edwards via KO, 2:47 of round 1
– Seth Baczynski def. Neil Magny via unanimous decision (29-28 x 3)
– Derek Brunson def. Brian Houston via submission (rear-naked choke), 0:48 of round 1

My brother, currently a U.S. Army Ranger captain stationed in Savannah, GA, used to be at Ft. Campbell with the 101st, so I’ve been anxious to cover this event (and Tim Kennedy, of course). And here we are.

Colton Smith vs Michael Chiesa

Rd. 1: Both men paw tentatively, and Smith opens with an easy roundhouse kick that grazes. Smith kicks higher now. Chiesa kicks, and Smith smiles at him. Chiesa charges in with a punch, and they clinch. Smith gets the takedown, and Chiesa turns towards Smith. Sweep, back control, and body triangle for Chiesa as he goes for the neck. Smith pries Chiesa’s hands away for now, escapes, and takes Chiesa’s back. Chiesa is up, but Smith is all over him. Smith looks to sink in the RNC as Chiesa tries to slam Smith off of him by dropping to the mat. Chiesa is out of the choke for now, but seemed to have taken a lot from Chiesa. Smith still has back control. Chiesa escapes and gets to his feet just seconds before the bell.

Rd 2: Early clinch and Smith has Chiesa against the cage. Smith lands some knees. Chiesa is off the cage and lands some long punches. Again Smith has Chiesa against the cage. Chiesa gets the takedown, takes Smith’s back, and chokes him out. That was an emphatic slam for a takedown, and the finish came seconds later. Looks like Smith was knocked silly by the takedown. Yup; they just replayed it. Chiesa hip tossed Smith onto his head. Nice win for Michael “Maverick” Chiesa.

Winner: Michael Chiesa via submission (rear-naked choke), 1:41 of round 2

 Jorge Masvidal vs. Rustam Khabilov

Rd 1: Early jab, faked shot, and beefy overhand right from Khabilov. That was heavy. Masvidal is starting slowly, but throwing hard. Both men look poised. Khabilov keeps changing levels, which seems to be keepi ng Masvidal from opening up. Khabilov misses a big right hook and bounces around calmly. Masvidal, Joe Rogan points out, might want to go back to some leg kicks. Masvidal presses ahead, clinches, and knees Khabilov. Khabilov grabs a single leg, but Masvidal knees and escapes. Masvidal lands a kick to the body. A Masvidal flying knee ends in a brief scramble. Masvidal is catching kicks and landing leg strikes of his own now. Khabilov catches a Masvidal kick and lands an overhand right. The round ends with both men clinching on the cage. Good action so far.

Rd 2: Khabilov looks loose, as does Masvidal. Khabilov is committed to the jab and working off of it. Masvidal is kicking now. Another 1-2 from Khabilov. Masvidal knees from the clinch and gets out before Khabilov gets a real hold of him. Nice left from Masvidal. Khabilov is really looking for that big overhand right off the jab. Again they clinch against the face, where Masvidal is hitting with knees. Masvidal drags Khabilov down and throws ‘bows. Khabilov is up now, and they separate. Khabilov charges in for the double, but Masvidal is staying up. Khabilov is having a hard time keeping Masvidal down. 1-2 from Khabilov, and there’s the horn.

Rd 3: Khabilov throws an early kick upstairs, which Masvidal blocks. Both men trade jabs. Stinging straight right from Masvidal.  Spinning back heel kick to the face from Khabilov and Masvidal is down. Khabilov has his back and Masvidal is spinning away. Jeez. They scramble, but Khabilov has back control and looks for the choke. Masvidal hip escapes and seems to have recovered a bit. Wow. They’re back up. Masvidal stuffs a takedown and has Khabilov against the cage. Masvidal tosses Khabilov down, but Khabilov is back up right away.  Masvidal tries the same spinning back kick, but Khabilov smothers it and has back control. Masvidal rolls out and goes for Khabilov’s back.  They’re up against the cage. They scramble. Masvidal shoots, Khabilov pounds at the body, and there’s the horn. Good fight.

Winner: Rustam Khabilov via unanimous decision (30-27 x 2, 29-28)

Ronny Markes vs. Yoel Romero

Rd 1: Nice inside leg kick from Markes early on. Romero flicks a kick after some feeling out. Markes snatches Romero’s lead leg, gets the takedown, but Romero pops up. Romero lands a hard left hand. Romero kicks at the body, slips, but is back up again before Markes can capitalize. Markes is looking to land the right cross, but Romero is moving fluidly. They clinch, and Markes is on top of Romero in side control. Markes lands some leather and wants the kimura on the left arm. Romero escapes, and they’re up. Straight left from Romero, who’s keeping his hands very high. Another left to the chin from Romero. Markes kicks the body. Markes misses a front head kick and stuffs a takedown. Markes front kicks to the body, but Romero blocks.

Rd 2: Romero pumps his right jab, blocks a head kick from Markes, and stuffs a takedown attempt. Romero kicks at the lead leg. Markes answers with an uppercut that misses. Markes hasn’t answered Romero’s left hand, and Romero muscles Markes to the mat. Markes is up and eats another left. Markes misses with both hands, and there’s the Romero left hand, right down the middle. Heavy kick to the body from Romero. Markes is down and Romero stands over him. The ref stands Markes up. Romero changes levels and lands another hard left. Here comes Markes with punches, but Romero ducks away from each strike. Romero fakes a shot and eats a right from Markes right before the round ends.

Rd 3: Markes comes out swinging, misses the takedown, and wants Romero to follow him to the ground. Nope. Romero answers a Markes left hand with a harder left of his own. Nice body kick from Markes. Romero sticks a left hand to the body of Markes. BAM. Romero drops Markes with a left over the top, follows up with a right hammer fist, and that’s it.

Winner: Yoel Romero via TKO, 1:39 of round 3

Liz Carmouche vs. Alexis Davis

Rd 1: All the ladies in the house say, “Ye-ah.” The lefty Carmouche jabs and kicks early, but Davis defends. Davis jabs and avoids a hard right from Carmouche. Carmouche kicks the lead leg and circles away from Davis’s right hand. Carmouche kicks the inside leg, and Davis counters with a 1-2 that Carmouche blocks. Davis licks low and again fires a 1-2. Davis blocks and overhand right from Carmouche. Davis is landing that inside leg kick, and it seems to be taking a toll on Carmouche, who kicks the outside of the lead leg of Davis. Big right from Carmouche. Both ladies kick at one another’s legs now,Davis kicks low, throws a 1-2,  and there’s the horn.

Rd 2: Davis again sets up the 1-2 with the leg kick. Carmouche is kicking low and throwing the right over the top, but Davis is controlling the center of the cage. Hard punch from Carmouche, and Davis is cut. They clinch against the cage, but break subsequently. Davis is bleeding pretty heavily from her left eye brow now. She keeps coming forward though. Carmouche kicks at the body and backs off of the longer Davis. Davis pumps the left jab as Davis pumps the left jab as  kicks low. Again Davis kicks the inside of the lead leg really hard. Carmouche’s right leg is definitely bothering her now. Davis catches a Carmouche kick and throws Carmouche down. Davis is in half guard and dropping the shoulder on Carmouche. Davis keeps side control and knees the body with ten seconds left. Carmouche escapes and gets top position, but the round ends before she can get any offense going.

Rd 3: Davis fires the 1-2 and knocks Carmouche down with a hard, low kick to the lead leg. They clinch against the cage; knees from Davis to the body and thighs. Carmouche lands a knee of her own, but Davis has double underhooks. The ref breaks them up and they go back to the center of the cage. Another 1-2 from the bloodied Davis. Carmouche is circling away pretty well, but there go two more hard kicks from Davis. Davis again has Carmouche on the fence and lands an elbow from close quarters. Both women swing and miss in the center of the octagon. Davis is getting her strikes off first, and Carmouche is flat-footed now.  Davis keeps kicking and moving ahead. Carmouche lands a short uppercut and a front kick to the body, and that’s the end of the fight.

Winner: Alexis Davis via unanimous decision (30 x 27 x 2, 29-28)

Tim Kennedy vs. Rafael Natal

Rd 1: Kennedy catches a kick from Natal and fires an overhand right. Natal kicks again. And again. Once more. Natal ducks a right hand and lands a jab to Kennedy. Natal pumps the jab, and Kennedy answers with a high kick. A left hand from Natal sneaks through. Natal kicks low, Kennedy high. Natal ducks a right hook and gets a quick takedown, but Kennedy pops up. Natal drops Kennedy with a hard leg kick. Kennedy lands a kick of his own. Kennedy’s left leg is red now. Huge body kick from Kennedy. Kennedy kicks high and misses with the right. Natal kicks low steps back, and throws a spinning back fist. Natal has been switching stances, and Kennedy is staying patient. A monster left hook catches Natal backing up, and he’s down. Kennedy drops some bombs, and that’s it. Natal is out.

Winner: Tim Kennedy via KO, 4:40 of round 1

‘Murica.

I’m out.  – Mk

U.S. Army Ranger vs. Filthy Bearded Hippie Added to ‘UFC Fight for the Troops 3?


(Look, you’re either with us or against us. / Colton Smith photo via kimurawear.com)

UFC officials have confirmed that a lightweight bout between TUF 16 winner Colton Smith (3-2) and TUF 15 winner Michael Chiesa (9-1) has been added to UFC Fight for the Troops 3, November 6th in Fort Campbell, Kentucky. On paper, the matchup might not blow your socks off — Smith is a methodical wrestler coming off a TKO loss to Robert Whittaker at UFC 160, while Chiesa suffered the first loss of his professional career when he was submitted by Jorge Masvidal at UFC on Fox: Johnson vs. Moraga. It’s safe to say that title contention won’t be on the line, here.

However, there is some relevance to Colton Smith being booked for the event, as he’s an Army Ranger and an instructor of hand-to-hand Combatives at Fort Hood. Clearly, he’ll play the role of fan-favorite for the military crowd, especially considering that Chiesa looks like a propaganda cartoon making fun of a dirty, draft-dodging pacifist and possible dope-fiend. PUT THE BOOTS TO HIM, COLT.

UFC Fight for the Troops 3 will be headlined by American hero Tim Kennedy vs. disgusting piss-guzzling foreigner Lyoto Machida.


(Look, you’re either with us or against us. / Colton Smith photo via kimurawear.com)

UFC officials have confirmed that a lightweight bout between TUF 16 winner Colton Smith (3-2) and TUF 15 winner Michael Chiesa (9-1) has been added to UFC Fight for the Troops 3, November 6th in Fort Campbell, Kentucky. On paper, the matchup might not blow your socks off — Smith is a methodical wrestler coming off a TKO loss to Robert Whittaker at UFC 160, while Chiesa suffered the first loss of his professional career when he was submitted by Jorge Masvidal at UFC on Fox: Johnson vs. Moraga. It’s safe to say that title contention won’t be on the line, here.

However, there is some relevance to Colton Smith being booked for the event, as he’s an Army Ranger and an instructor of hand-to-hand Combatives at Fort Hood. Clearly, he’ll play the role of fan-favorite for the military crowd, especially considering that Chiesa looks like a propaganda cartoon making fun of a dirty, draft-dodging pacifist and possible dope-fiend. PUT THE BOOTS TO HIM, COLT.

UFC Fight for the Troops 3 will be headlined by American hero Tim Kennedy vs. disgusting piss-guzzling foreigner Lyoto Machida.

UFC 160: Velasquez vs. Bigfoot 2 — FX Prelims Liveblog


(Mike Tyson‘s first night as Dana White’s bodyguard was also his last. / Photo via the UFC 160 weigh-in photos gallery on MMAFighting.com)

The FX Prelims broadcast for UFC 160 kicks off tonight at 8 p.m. ET / 5 p.m. PT, and our man Anthony Gannon will be laying down live round-by-round results after the jump. So will Khabib Nurmagomedov redeem himself after shitting the bed at yesterday’s weigh-ins? Can Mike Pyle enter the four-fight win streak club? And which obscure TUF winner will we have to start caring about, Colton Smith or Robert Whittaker? Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest updates, and use the comments section to let us know you’re here.


(Mike Tyson‘s first night as Dana White’s bodyguard was also his last. / Photo via the UFC 160 weigh-in photos gallery on MMAFighting.com)

The FX Prelims broadcast for UFC 160 kicks off tonight at 8 p.m. ET / 5 p.m. PT, and our man Anthony Gannon will be laying down live round-by-round results after the jump. So will Khabib Nurmagomedov redeem himself after shitting the bed at yesterday’s weigh-ins? Can Mike Pyle enter the four-fight win streak club? And which obscure TUF winner will we have to start caring about, Colton Smith or Robert Whittaker? Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest updates, and use the comments section to let us know you’re here.

What up, Potato Nation? In honor of Memorial Day – as we pass the time chugging beers and stuffing our diabetic faces with Ball Park franks – let us pay homage to those who made the supreme sacrifice so we could be free to live our disgustingly gluttonous lives. That being said, before we dive into tonight’s action, a little reflection is in order.

The bloodiest war in American history – some of you know it as the Civil War; others, the War of Northern Aggression – brought this noble holiday upon us. Whatever you wish to call it, the fact remains that it was a real fucked up war. Memorial Day was born of that fucked up war as a day to remember the greater than 600,000 Americans who died in it. It’s since become a day to honor those who died in all wars – well, technically. In reality it’s a day off work where we eat, drink, and buy shit on sale. So it’s really no surprise that the true meaning of the holiday has been lost on so many.

But still, you’d think the name alone, Memorial, would at least lead a person to venture an educated guess. Not so much. This video right here some shameful shit. Luckily though, part of being a free person includes the liberty to be as ignant as you damn well please.

God bless America! Now let’s get it poppin’ up in this bitch.

If you missed the weigh-ins last night do check it out. Just peep Mike Tyson in the picture above and tell me what you see, well besides the psychotic facial tat. My man is sporting all white, like all white, down to his kicks. Normally I spend the weigh-ins in deep philosophical contemplation about who has the most little bumps on their areolas: Arianny, Britney, or Joe Silva. This time I couldn’t divert my attention from Tyson’s absurd wardrobe. Trust me, it’s a surreal must-see.

Well, at least we got us some MMA to make sense of this shit. And in case I forget later, WAR MARK HUNT!

Here’s what went down on Facebook:

Jeremy Stephens defeated Estevan Payan by unanimous decision, 30-26, 30-26, 30-27.

George Roop blasted Brian Bowles for a 2nd round TKO.

Stephen Thompson beat Nah-Shon Burrell by unanimous decision, 29-28, 30-27, 29-28.

Khabib Nurmagomedov vs Abel Trujillo starts us off on FX.

Two very promising prospects here. Khabib is 3-0 in the UFC, while Trujillo impressed in his debut back in December by demolishing Marcus LeVessuer with knees to the body that were downright criminal.

Khabib missed weight by 3 ½ pounds. Sucks for him. He chose to forfeit 20% of his purse rather than take additional years off his life by futilely trying to make the limit. Wise decision. The NSAC will get half of the fine, while his opponent will get the other half. Based on his last disclosed purse – a 10/10 contract – that would amount to $2000 in Trujillo’s pockets if he loses, $1000 is he wins. Considering Trujillo’s last purse was the dreaded 6/6, every little bit helps.

Round 1: Trujillo opens with a huge hook, misses. Misses another. Charges forward and lands a shot on Khabib. Trujillo lands a takedown, Khabib working from guard, going for an armbar. Trujillo degending so far, but he’s in a sucky position. Ok, he’s free. Khabib is up, then trips Trujillo to the ground. He stands up, but Khabib is stuck to his back. Takes him down again. Lands a knee to the ribs. Khabib tosses him to the ground again, Trujillo stands right back up. And again. And again. And Jesus H Christ, again. Trujillo reverses, now he’s on top. Khabib in guard, working a triangle. Uh-oh! Now he’s on top with the hold locked on. He’s looking to switch to an armbar, goes back to the triangle, but the round ends, Trujillo survives. 10-9 Khabib

Round 2: Trujillo whiffs a huge shot, Khabib takes his back standing again. Takes him down, but Trujillo spins out. They’re up. Khabib lands a nice shot, now on his back again, trips him to the ground, has his back, working some knees to the Charlie horse area. Now to the midsection. He gets a hook in now, has a body triangle, going for the choke. Khabib lets go of the body triangle, but Khabib is still on him. He hoists him up again and drops him. Look at this, Trujillo spins out again, but they scramble and get back to the feet. Khabib takes his ass down again, riding his back. Trujillo gets up, and guess what? Yep, Khabib drags him down yet again. A couple shots from behind from Khabib. The round ends with a clear 10-9 for Khabib.

Round 3: Here we go, final round. Trujillo begins by missing a huge shot again, seems to be the opener of choice for him. Khabib is handling him in the grappling department again, riding his back as they trade takedowns for stand ups. Khabib with some nice knees to the ribs. Trujillo is looking to Mario Yamasaki for help. What he wants here is a mystery seeing. Khabib on top now, lands a short elbow. Khabib isn’t really doing much damage, but he is dominating Trujillo here. More and more takedowns. Trujillo doesn’t even seem to know he’s in a fight. Oh, big slam by Khabib to end the fight. 10-8 Khabib.

Trujillo represented the Blackzilians in that one.

The decision is in, and it’s exactly what you’d expect, unanimous, 30-27 across the board.

Not exactly a red hot way to begin the evening, luckily Colton Smith is up next to heat this shit up.

Colton Smith and Robert Whittaker are up. Two TUF winners here, but really, does anyone actually give a shit about that anymore? I propose we strike that term from the record.

Anyway, nothing better to weaken your buzz and produce an incredible soft-on than a Colton Smith fight. He’s a stick-to-your-ribs wrestler, and, well that’s about it. The problem for anyone who cannot counter that ability is that Colton doesn’t give a scintilla of a shit how aesthetically brutal his fights are. He’s here to win. Hey, can’t fault a fellow for that. No logic in stand and bang when that clearly aint your thang.

It’s all about recognizing strengths and weaknesses and formulating a plan of attack that maximizes the probability of success. Omar would never have been able to take on the Barksdales, Prop Joe, Marlo Stanfield, or anyone else for that matter if he didn’t utilize that formula. His greatest strength was not his cantaloupe sized nuts. It was his patience in reconnaissance. Omar would sit on a stash house, corner or foe for days on end, weeks if need be until he knew every nook and cranny of his target. That was the key to his success. Colton’s strength is to take a fool down and ride out the 15 minutes. I’d bet one of Omar’s substantial testicles that’s exactly what Colton’s going to do here.

Round 1: Here we go. Whittaker has his hands very low. Colton shoots, nice, Whittaker defends. High kick by Colton misses. Colton jumps in, gets tagged. Whittaker with a jab, Colton blocks it with his forehead. Colton lands a nice right hand. Whittaker responds with a right of his own. Nice combo by Whittaker. Leg kick by Colton. Whittaker misses a left hook. Colton misses another high kick. Whittaker sticks a nice jab. Colton throws three rights in a row, misses every one of them. Whittaker stuffs another takedown. Nice TD defense, thank God. Whittaker jumps in, lands a decent shot. Colton responds with a hard shot of his own. And Colton drops him with a big right, working a Kimura. Takes him down with it, but Whittaker is up. Close round. 10-9 Whittaker

Round 2: Colton eats a huge left hook to start things off, he’s hurt. Whittaker lets him off the hook. Colton’s right eye is swollen. Colton lands a decent shot, then a straight right. Counter left by Whittaker. Colton charges in, Whittaker backs him up with a shot to the grill. Big right by Colton skims Whittaker. They exchange, Whittaker takes one in the nads. They continue. Colton with a right, then a kick to the body. Colton eats a couple as he wades in. Front kick misses by Colton. Big left by Whittaker, Colton’s face is a disaster. Whittaker lands another. Oof, Colton eats several upper cuts. Whittaker turning it up as the round closes. 10-9 Whittaker

Round 3: Colton looks like a thin Sloth, he’s banged up. Whittaker opens with a left, then drops Colton and descends on him. The ref steps in and ends it, kind of a questionable stoppage there. He was hurt, no doubt, but not finished by any means.

The official decision is in, and it’s a TKO in round three for Robert Whittaker. Nice win, and great job not letting it turn into a wrestle-hump fest.

Dennis Bermudez vs Max Holloway is up next.

Even though he sports the most pathetically predictable nickname in the biz, Dennis “The Menace” Bermudez has become quite adept at picking up Fight Night bonus checks. Four UFC fights, three checks so far. And if these guys come out and perform as they’re both capable of, this could be another one.

Holloway, at only 21 years of age, is the youngest fighter currently on the UFC roster. He’s a talented striker who’s very rangy for featherweight. If he can stay off his back he’s got a good shot here.

Round 1: Holloway misses a jab, Bermudez misses a straight right. Front kick to the body by Holloway, Bermudez grabs a leg, Holloway defends, lands a nice straight right. Then sticks a jab. Bermudez trying to figure out how to get inside Holloway’s range, eats another jab. Holloway is really working that jab, using his reach very effectively. Bermudez with a leg kick. Combo by Holloway, blocked. Bermudez shoots, Holloway defends. Bermudez has Holloway pressed against the cage, Holloway escapes. Big leg kick by Bermudez. Spinning back kick by Holloway, Bermudez rocked. Knee to the body, Holloway is working him here. Bermudez holding on against the cage for dear life, hoping to recover. Bermudez misses an uppercut, Holloway lands a hige right, then follows with a spinning body kick that looks like it sucked.  Damn, lands another one, then to the head, drops Bermudez. Wow, 10-9 Holloway

Round 2: Bermudez shoots, get sit, but Holloway reverses, takes his back, then backs off with a kick to the face. Damn! Bermudez skims an overhand right, then lands a leg kick. Holloway responds with one of his own, then eats a left hook. Holloway with a jab. High kick by Holloway, blocked. They trade jabs. Hollowat goes hard to the body then lands to the head. Bermudez misses a huge left hook. Holloway lands to the grill. Bermudez lands a hard leg kick. Holloway sticks a combination. Bermudez misses a takedown, but lands an elbow as he presses Holloway into the cage. Holloway responds with an elbow of his own. Holloway with a job, eats another hard leg kick. And another. Holloway throws another spinning kick, barely lands. Bermudez thinks Superman punch, eats another combo. Holloway misses a Matrix kixk. Bermudze gets a takedown, and working in guard. Lands an elbow. Close round. I’d give the edge to Holloway, 10-9

Round 3: They bro hug it out to start things off. Holloway lands to the body, eats a kick to the chops. Bermudze grabs a leg, takes Holloway down. Holloway up, but eats a knee off the break. Holloway goes to the body again. They trade jabs. Jab by Holloway, leg kick by Bermudez. Big right just misses by Bermudez. Jab by Holloway. Bermudez shoots again, gets it, but Holloway pops back up. Kick by Bermudez, blocked. Left lands by Bermudez. Holloway shoots, stuffed. Duel leg kicks by Bermudez, and he lands a takedown. Working from the closed guard, dropping elbows. Nice. Now Holloway has half guard now, but he’s still eating elbows. Bermudze tries to mount, has to settle for half guard again. The round ends with Holloway on top, dropping punches. 10-9 Bermudez

The decision is in, and it’s a split decision for Dennis Bermudez, 29-28 across the board.

Next up we have Mike Pyle vs Rick Story.

Almost two years ago to the day, Rick Story culminated a six fight winning streak by beating Thiago Silva. He was viewed by many as a viable title contender. The sky was the limit for the aggressive youngster from Washington. But then the poor bastard started losing fights: first to Charlie Brenneman, then to Martin Kampmann before a newly minted submission – The Face-Crank of Utter Woe – was invented by Demian Maia and tested on Story. He did, in the spirit of optimism, manage to sandwich a win in there to a guy who no one cares about. Now, coming off a first round starching of Quinn Mulhern, Story is hoping to get back on track to his previous status.

Standing in his way is Mike “King Mullet” Pyle, who at 37 years old is on a sweet hot streak of three first round knockouts, and an overall UFC record that stands at a very respectable 7-3. After ruining James Head with knees in his last outing, Pyle thought he deserved Top 10 billing and all the accoutrement that goes with that, including a Top 10 opponent. While that didn’t happen for him, Story does represent a step up in competition from his previous victims. And while a win wouldn’t exactly put him in the Top 10, it would be one step closer to proving to the world that the Samsonite theory of sporting a ridiculous hairdo is not to be taken lightly in the realm of battle. See Roy Nelson and Ben Henderson.

Round 1: Story takes the center of the cage right off the bat. Pyle lands a knee, Story tosses him to the ground. Story working from Pyle’s guard. Throwing to the body, Pyle working a high guard, looking for submissions. Pyle doing a great job of controlling Story’s posture. He grabs an arm, but Story escapes. Pyle is on his back, but he’s doing a great job of keeping Story busy defending to where he cannot do much damage. Pyle is up. Huge left by Story, then goes hard to the body. Pyle misses a jab. Story whiffs a left. Leg kick by Pyle. Story drops Pyle with a shot, dropping bombs on Pyle. Story is whaling away on Pyle from behind. Pyle survives, but took a beating. 10-9 Story

Round 2: Front kick by Pyle, misses. Huge left by Story, skims Pyle. Story lands a straight left. Pyle clinches and delivers a knee. Story going for a takedown, sticks it. Pyle going for a Kimura. Damn, looks pretty nasty. Story’s arm is free, and he’s in half guard, now full guard. Story can’t get much going from top position, Pyle is defending very well. Pyle looking to push off the cage, Story postures up, but still cannot land anything significant. The natives are getting restless. Story is just kind of laying on Pyle, can’t really do anything. The round ends without much going on. 10-9 Story

Round 3: Softest leg kick ever from Pyle, Story responds with a huge shot to the head. Story goes to the body, Pyle misses a knee. Story looked winded. Pyle lands a front kick. Story answers to the body. Pyle clinches, lands a knee. Then an elbow. Pyle clinches again, Story presses him against the cage. Pyle with another elbow over the top. More elbows from Pyle, and Story is bleeding. Story has Pyle’s back, working some knees to the thigh. The pace has slowed considerably. Story is exhausted, his punches are slow and labored. Pyle is teeing off now, but Story sticks a takedown. Pyle going for an armbar, and sweeps! Beautiful. Pyle has the body triangle, and thr round ends before he could get the submission. 10-9 Pyle

The decision is in, and it’s split. Mike Pyle gets the nod, 29-28.

I like the decision, it means the judges took into consideration that Story, even though on top, did nothing in round two. Nice.

Well that’s it for me, folks. Enjoy the main card. WAR MARK HUNT!